MAFS Social Media, Spoilers & Speculation

[cardigirl]

Unfiltered comes on after Married at First Site on the FYI channel. 

[Enero]

^ Oh ok that explains it. I watch the show on A&E. 

[BunnySlippers]

8 hours ago, Snarklepuss said:

Wow, I watched that clip of Nick at the break of "Unfiltered" - Well, now I know what he was hiding.  No surprise there, it was obvious to me anyway. What an ass, just blurting out that he doesn't find her attractive like that.  What I noticed at the very end was a clip of Sonia wheeling out her suitcase.  I wonder if that means she leaves him for good after that.

I sure hope so! She deserves better than this.

And I saw the wheeling out the suitcase thing, too. But I bet they're going to stretch the whole thing out and we'll get a cliffhanger at the end of the episode. Will Sonia leave Nick? Stay tuned!

I think that scene we saw previously in a preview that showed her taking off her ring in the car must have been after this fight.

[okerry]

Unfiltered doesn't air on A&E. AFAIK, you have to watch it on cable channel FYI or go to the FYI website to see it. But it was worth it last night to see Nick go off.

[amola]

I can't get Social Media on my work computer but wanted to post that Nick's new MO on social media is that people should not be judging him for any bad behavior until they know the facts. Sonia on the other hand posted an incredibly classy post on Instagram - saying that he didn't say it in the nicest way but the honesty was welcome. I know some don't like her voice but she seems like a very genuine, sweet person. Even if she wasn't that into him, it's got to be hard to hear that. No one wants to be told that someone doesn't find them attractive.

[BunnySlippers]

^^I think she's a very nice person, too. Sometimes I can't understand what she says, but she doesn't annoy me. I hope one day she'll meet someone who will genuinely care about her.

[stuckin60s]

If I remember correctly, early in the season, Heather mentioned on her TH that she had a very good life and knew exactly what she wanted.  Derek wasn't it.  she mentioned last night that she thought Derek was willing to be married to ANYONE he was matched with.  I think she is a shrew

Over Lily and Tom kissing

Nick and Sonja, I hope that yelling clip was a misdirect for us.  I like her and him together, or at least I want to

[Jellybeans]

I kind of think it was a misdirect but I don't know.  I think both Nick and Sonia hate talking and/or showing developing affection in front of the cameras.  Him, more than her but she is also uncomfortable.  I had to watch the whole show without captions.  I am deaf and need them... but I am not 100% sure of my theory either.  

Lily and Tom are ok for now...  Hope they are getting to know each other beyond a physical level.  

[qtpye]

Can anyone post a link to the online unfiltered video?

[crazychicken]

11 minutes ago, qtpye said:

Can anyone post a link to the online unfiltered video?

I watch on youtube as it is not geoblocked

Unfiltered

Confessions no Nick rant thought

[okerry]

If I remember correctly, early in the season, Heather mentioned on her TH that she had a very good life and knew exactly what she wanted.  Derek wasn't it.  she mentioned last night that she thought Derek was willing to be married to ANYONE he was matched with. 

(sorry, quote box not working)

Did someone forget to tell Heather that "being married to anyone you're matched with" IS the premise of the whole show? That it wasn't a dating show where you get to pick and choose??

[crazychicken]

Just now, okerry said:

If I remember correctly, early in the season, Heather mentioned on her TH that she had a very good life and knew exactly what she wanted.  Derek wasn't it.  she mentioned last night that she thought Derek was willing to be married to ANYONE he was matched with. 

(sorry, quote box not working)

Did someone forget to tell Heather that "being married to anyone you're matched with" IS the premise of the whole show? That it wasn't a dating show where you get to pick and choose??

Also that they MARRIED not dating so they would work harder to sort their issues out. I think Heather missed the memo.

[Snarklepuss]

29 minutes ago, crazychicken said:

Also that they MARRIED not dating so they would work harder to sort their issues out. I think Heather missed the memo.

I don't think Heather missed the memo.  I think Derek pissed her off so much in the way he responded to her dislike of the smoking that she couldn't get over it.  Technically being married is not enough to repair the damage when someone you just met pretty much tore their shirt and burned their bridges with you.  Which is what I suspect really happened off camera and we didn't see.  I don't trust Derek's "high road" act.  I think he knows that what he did to alienate her would never be aired anyway so he could act like she was the bad guy and he was the victim.  JMHO.

[crazychicken]

Here is an article from the producers on the split

https://www.realityblurred.com/realitytv/2016/09/derek-heather-divorce-married-at-first-sight/

Interesting to me that they were not aware that the issues were so huge until the meeting with Cal and the problems they experienced were normal for a lot of the couples. The difference here I think is that the other couples were willing to try where Heather just gave up.

[Evil Queen]

10 hours ago, Enero said:

I'm on the east coast and never see Unfiltered aired on TV. I always have to watch on the FYI website. Once MAFS goes off Born This Way Comes on. MAFS did show a preview for next week but it was more awkward Sonia and Nick, no yelling. 

That said, Sonia must've finally confronted Nick about opening up or tried to jump his bones and he got mad and admitted what most of us suspected from the beginning that he's not interested in her. Like someone said, he probably thought he could play cold fish and use his "I'm really shy" mantra to get  six weeks of free advertisement for his businesses and some easy money from the show. 

I feel bad that Sonia will be rejected this way, but on the flip side I don't ever think she thought Nick was all that either, but she probably thought his personality was agreeable enough that she tried to make it work. My point, her walking away from him or him walking away from her, if that's how this goes, will IMO be no big loss to her. 

1 hour ago, amola said:

I can't get Social Media on my work computer but wanted to post that Nick's new MO on social media is that people should not be judging him for any bad behavior until they know the facts. Sonia on the other hand posted an incredibly classy post on Instagram - saying that he didn't say it in the nicest way but the honesty was welcome. I know some don't like her voice but she seems like a very genuine, sweet person. Even if she wasn't that into him, it's got to be hard to hear that. No one wants to be told that someone doesn't find them attractive.

I saw it in an ad since I dvr it when its replayed in the middle of the night and it was during the regular show. It looked like it was in a TH. Which could have been done in another room with her being able to hear him yelling it when it came to not finding her attractive or not liking her. Yet the whole screaming at her to stop saying open up. Well when he doesn't do anything at all and she tries to without stepping on his toes, what else is she suppose to do? He doesn't talk to her about anything at all (that we see). Of course on SM he is going to try to spin it. While sure what the previews/ads are at times are not always what they seem, it also can be very telling as well on someone when they behave that way. Heck even Ashley didn't throw a fit and yell like that how she didn't like David. Yet its reminding me of something that a recent guy on the Bachelor had said. Basically he played up the villain part....why? Because he knew that those that play up the villain part will get that air time and not be forgotten. So the behave gets worse and worse as the show goes on so you will remember that horrible person on "inset show". Not saying this is the case here but he seems to want to do nothing but shove this clothing line in our faces on the show. Which btw, I don't have SM accts but glanced at his Twitter where I see he has pushed his rentals or helping do remodels and his clothing line. So yeah tell me again he isn't using this to push his businesses? SMH Shame on this show for letting it happen on tv and under the SM for the show. Nick is one of the biggest frauds on this show IMO. 

 

21 minutes ago, crazychicken said:

Also that they MARRIED not dating so they would work harder to sort their issues out. I think Heather missed the memo.

Maybe the issues were not something that could get sorted out like some. We have no clue beyond the pot smoking what really happened. There is so many wholes in how it was edited and what was said in things we saw that it is obvious things were left out. Yet why we have no clue. IMO they gave her a bad edit for no reason and are giving his whiny pathetic ass the idiot to try to get sympathy that he doesn't deserve.  

7 minutes ago, crazychicken said:

Here is an article from the producers on the split

https://www.realityblurred.com/realitytv/2016/09/derek-heather-divorce-married-at-first-sight/

Interesting to me that they were not aware that the issues were so huge until the meeting with Cal and the problems they experienced were normal for a lot of the couples. The difference here I think is that the other couples were willing to try where Heather just gave up.

This came off as the producer trying to spin things. You can't tell me they didn't realize how bad it was before that meeting. Even with the editing and all we would see how bad it was. They are sure trying to spin it like oh maybe they will get back together before its over and so they will follow them still since they had no clue what would go on. SMH IMO they should have let it go once it was said and done on wanting the divorce. 

[zxy556575]

8 hours ago, amola said:

Nick's new MO on social media is that people should not be judging him for any bad behavior until they know the facts.

Well, Nick. If there's a conspiracy to hide certain "facts" from us, now's your chance. Or, you know, you could have tried to say something or act differently while you were being filmed 16 hours a day.

His "fuck the haterz" video with the dog lapping his mouth already told me what I need to know about him.

Edited September 14, 2016 by lordonia

[AuntEdna]

https://www.instagram.com/The_Broke_Philanthropist/

This is Sonia's other Instagram account.  If we go on the date of her and Nick's wedding as beginning of April (from the photo of the card she sent to Nick on the wedding day) - then 6 weeks out is mid-April.  If you look at her posts on that Instagram account from mid-April it is all about being rejected and people hurting you.  

My opinion is that she couldn't post her feelings on her own accounts and this was a small way she could "vent" her hurt from being rejected by Nick.  So...as much as they have been trying to keep us wondering, I am fairly confident they are NOT together.  The photo of them bowling from her birthday, and the perceived friendliness between the two on SM (in my opinion) is only because she is such a forgiving, gracious person.  I felt like her Instagram post last night on her personal page (photo) was a glimpse into her hurt.  

ALSO, she says on a Facebook post https://www.facebook.com/sonia.granados?fref=ts on September 8 that we will get to know her father and I'm wondering if we will see him consoling/counseling his little girl after her broken heart.  They have to have something to fill the time and since Derek/Heather are gone and Sonia/Nick not talking, they need to fill it up...  Just MY OPINIONS.... Whatcha think? 

[SaucyMommy]

15 minutes ago, AuntEdna said:

https://www.instagram.com/The_Broke_Philanthropist/

This is Sonia's other Instagram account.  If we go on the date of her and Nick's wedding as beginning of April (from the photo of the card she sent to Nick on the wedding day) - then 6 weeks out is mid-April.  If you look at her posts on that Instagram account from mid-April it is all about being rejected and people hurting you.  

My opinion is that she couldn't post her feelings on her own accounts and this was a small way she could "vent" her hurt from being rejected by Nick.  So...as much as they have been trying to keep us wondering, I am fairly confident they are NOT together.  The photo of them bowling from her birthday, and the perceived friendliness between the two on SM (in my opinion) is only because she is such a forgiving, gracious person.  I felt like her Instagram post last night on her personal page (photo) was a glimpse into her hurt.  

ALSO, she says on a Facebook post https://www.facebook.com/sonia.granados?fref=ts on September 8 that we will get to know her father and I'm wondering if we will see him consoling/counseling his little girl after her broken heart.  They have to have something to fill the time and since Derek/Heather are gone and Sonia/Nick not talking, they need to fill it up...  Just MY OPINIONS.... Whatcha think? 

I agree with your assumption. They are done.

[crazychicken]

Except Heather & Derek are not gone the article says that they continued filming as they were still under contract and the producers were unsure what would happen once Heather was less overwhelmed.

 

From that article I assumed that Heather thought once she made her decision she was done with filming but production made her continue and she was not happy. Maybe that explains the SM silence, lack of family and friends and late filming of Unfiltered  from her as she was forced to continue.

[HZAnita]

So....Nick really is an ass.  :/

[ctbabe]

http://nypost.com/2016/09/14/derek-opens-up-about-married-at-first-sight-divorce-it-hurt-me-so-much/

[ctbabe]

http://www.theknotnews.com/mafs-pastor-calvin-roberson-derek-heather-compatible-exclusive-13183

[Paddywagon]

29 minutes ago, ctbabe said:

http://nypost.com/2016/09/14/derek-opens-up-about-married-at-first-sight-divorce-it-hurt-me-so-much/

Derek really needs to stop the whiney little bitch routine.  He's not doing himself any favors.

[ChristmasJones]

This link may have already been posted but I agree with her assessment of Nick:

http://tamaratattles.com/2016/09/07/married-at-first-sight-for-better-or-worse/

[cardigirl]

1 hour ago, Paddywagon said:

Derek really needs to stop the whiney little bitch routine.  He's not doing himself any favors.

Eh, I didn't read much whining in that article. I don't know if it all is true, but if it is, Heather shut it down almost immediately after the wedding. He didn't stand a chance. 

[Snarklepuss]

7 hours ago, AuntEdna said:

ALSO, she says on a Facebook post https://www.facebook.com/sonia.granados?fref=ts on September 8 that we will get to know her father and I'm wondering if we will see him consoling/counseling his little girl after her broken heart.  They have to have something to fill the time and since Derek/Heather are gone and Sonia/Nick not talking, they need to fill it up...  Just MY OPINIONS.... Whatcha think? 

"So now we know he's not gay (lol)"......Could that be sarcasm?  The LOL is what's making me think that.  It's almost like a "yeah, right sure, I'm just kidding".

"The way he did it was not right, but hey he opened up" - Sonia, be careful what you wish for, you just may get it, right?  Sorry but Nick's got a lot of issues.  He's not just introverted and private, he's dysfunctional.  I don't make any excuses for him.  There are a lot of private, introverted people in this world that would never act so emotionally immature. 

"Don't hate him just yet" - Sorry, Sonia but I'm waaaay too old to be that forgiving of an asshole.  Perhaps that's one reason why I've been successful at finding love and she has not.  She's too forgiving and lets men treat her like a doormat.  I'll bet, anyway.  Or she's just trying to cover her rear end about not leaking any spoilers about how they end up.  She's probably going to end up like Sam with Neil last season, shooting herself in the foot and martyring herself vowing to "be his friend if that's what he wants".  Although I don't really think she's as into Nick as Sam was with Neil. 

BTW, Neil wasn't really that closed and introverted and neither is Nick, IMHO.  That's just the way a guy tends to act when he's not into a woman and he's forced into enduring a "desert island situation" with her.

[Paddywagon]

2 hours ago, cardigirl said:

Eh, I didn't read much whining in that article. I don't know if it all is true, but if it is, Heather shut it down almost immediately after the wedding. He didn't stand a chance. 

He never really tried to find out why she shut down though.  The thing is, nowhere in the interview does he accept any responsibility whatsoever for the breakdown between them.  He didn't make any attempt to talk to her...he just whined about things.  

I admit, being with a guy like that would just drive me nuts.  

The bike ride...it seems he didn't try to converse with her like an adult and try to find out what was wrong.  There is no evidence he tried that and he doesn't mention trying anything in the interview.  He just whines about her not riding with him.

When they were in the cave they had a moment where they actually conversed and built a small, fragile connection.  And he chose to whine at her because she left the cave without him.  He totally obliterated their connection.  Yes, he had a right to bring that up but timing and tone is everything and he blew it big time.  Not only does he not bring that up in the interview but he doesn't mention doing anything to affect the relationship negatively.  

Nor does he bring up that maybe, just MAYBE, he overreacted with the surfing instructor.  

It's like he says negative things at the wrong time in the wrong tone and then gets defensive when he doesn't get a positive reaction.  Then he blames the other person for not reacting positively.

This guy needs to grow up and accept responsibility for his actions and quit abdicating blame for the problems he causes.

[ChaChaSlide]

I still think a better match would've been Nick and Heather. From the beginning, I thought that Heather would be more Nick's type, physically at the very least, and Heather would be happier with his looks and his low 6 figure earnings. 

Derek is really immature and annoying to me, a perpetual teenager, but if there was anyone to overlook his behavior and stay married to him, it would be Sonia. She comes across as really desperate, and it's sad. I think she's a pretty woman, and has a really good heart (socialwork is probably one of the most emotionally tolling careers out there), but has really low self esteem; this marriage to Nick is just another blow to her very fragile ego. I hope she works on herself and starts believing that she is enough, when she does that a nice guy will come along.

[Enero]

5 minutes ago, ChaChaSlide said:

I still think a better match would've been Nick and Heather. From the beginning, I thought that Heather would be more Nick's type, physically at the very least, and Heather would be happier with his looks and his low 6 figure earnings. 

I disagree. Nick comes off as emotionally stunted, inexperienced with relationships and just as immature as Derek. He also occasionally smokes. Whether that's weed or cigarettes is unknown, but really I don't think his descent income (which was hardly six figures. I think the most he ever made was 90k and he has significant debt) would give him a pass with Heather. As others have stated I think she's looking for a man who is mature and sophisticated and Nick certainly isn't that. 

Regarding Sonia, I think you may be on to something. She does come off as if there is a lack of confidence there. However, that could be due to her not getting any reinforcements from Nick physically or emotionally. I think dealing with that day in and out would be a blow to any woman's ego and cause them to lose a bit of confidence in their awesomeness. 

[HZAnita]

6 hours ago, Snarklepuss said:

"So now we know he's not gay (lol)"......Could that be sarcasm?  The LOL is what's making me think that.  It's almost like a "yeah, right sure, I'm just kidding".

"The way he did it was not right, but hey he opened up" - Sonia, be careful what you wish for, you just may get it, right?  Sorry but Nick's got a lot of issues.  He's not just introverted and private, he's dysfunctional.  I don't make any excuses for him.  There are a lot of private, introverted people in this world that would never act so emotionally immature. 

"Don't hate him just yet" - Sorry, Sonia but I'm waaaay too old to be that forgiving of an asshole.  Perhaps that's one reason why I've been successful at finding love and she has not.  She's too forgiving and lets men treat her like a doormat.  I'll bet, anyway.  Or she's just trying to cover her rear end about not leaking any spoilers about how they end up.  She's probably going to end up like Sam with Neil last season, shooting herself in the foot and martyring herself vowing to "be his friend if that's what he wants".  Although I don't really think she's as into Nick as Sam was with Neil. 

BTW, Neil wasn't really that closed and introverted and neither is Nick, IMHO.  That's just the way a guy tends to act when he's not into a woman and he's forced into enduring a "desert island situation" with her.

After seeing all of that in the preview, I have no idea how Sonia can remain as seemingly friendly with Nick as she has.  His outburst in the preview kind of scared me a bit.  He seems so outwardly bland, the level of anger/frustration he showed was jarring.  I guess that's because he's been bottling his feelings up all of this time and lying to the cameras.  It's tough to live a lie.

[1992austenlover]

1 hour ago, HZAnita said:

After seeing all of that in the preview, I have no idea how Sonia can remain as seemingly friendly with Nick as she has.  His outburst in the preview kind of scared me a bit.  He seems so outwardly bland, the level of anger/frustration he showed was jarring.  I guess that's because he's been bottling his feelings up all of this time and lying to the cameras.  It's tough to live a lie.

To be honest, I'm just happy that Nick's true feelings on the matter have finally come out because I could not handle another episode of him pretending that he's into Sonia when it's been clear for awhile now that he's been silently struggling in this relationship. I've tried so hard to like Sonia and Nick (what can I say? I'm a sucker for a cute, quirky couple) but my problem with them has always revolved around the fact that the relationship has never really felt authentic and real to me as Nick's words have never matched his body language/actions. I thought that maybe he was acting this way because he was uncomfortable with the filming process and being vulnerable on camera (factors that would definitely impact my behaviour if I were put in that situation) but now it's pretty clear that his emotional detachment primarily stems from his lack of attraction to his wife. I give him some credit for trying to get to know Sonia as a person before verbalizing these feelings as opposed to potentially sabotaging things from the beginning by admitting from the get-go that he wasn't attracted to her, but I do think that his breakdown in that preview was definitely a cause for concern and it will be interesting to see if they could recover from that explosion.

However, I don't think that Nick is a bad person by any means; I just think that he's one of those people who tend to bottle their true feelings until they reach a breaking point that causes them to explode. I can relate to that--I hate confrontation so I usually tend to try to brush things off until the situation escalates to a point where I feel like it's affecting my complete mental state and only then will I feel the need to unload. Like Nick, I'm pretty shy and introverted and I need time to process my feelings before I feel comfortable making moves/concrete decisions so I do get where he is coming from in that respect. That being said, do I think that him yelling about how he doesn't find Sonia attractive after weeks of saying that he did find her attractive was the best course of action to take? Probably not. But then again, at least he was honest and now that his cards are officially on the table, he and Sonia could hopefully start interacting with each other on a deeper level. Good, bad or indifferent, I do actually think that this is progress for them. 

[SaucyMommy]

Watching that clip of Nick Popping off - reminds me of an exboyfriend I had. Initially he was great - but over time became moody, quiet and would not talk to me at all. He would hold it in and then just explode at me - and it turned out he had been wanting to split up for weeks. I was like Sonia - totally clueless about what was going on because when I would try to talk to him - he would give me one word answers or basically ignore me. I can't blame her for wanting to know what is going on - I think she said in a TH - she would rather know if he didn't like her so then she WOULD KNOW. Honestly - she doesn't really seem to be that in to him at all either. I think Nick thinks she likes him because she's trying - I just think she's being polite.

[MV713]

Anyone able to find out any of the other cast members "real" social media?

[cecig75]

I've noticed on social media that Tom, Derek, Sonia and Lilly hang out. Nick has been noticeably absent from their outings including the ones with the guys alone. I'm curious if it's a total coincidence or perhaps has not been invited?

He has, however, been promoting his rentals and clothing line non-stop! I'm hoping Sonia doesn't pull a Sam on decision day. I really like her.

I agree with others that Nick should've been paired up with Heather...they are both so dry!

Sonia and Derek would've been a much better match. Perhaps production can make something happen with those 2???

[cardigirl]

10 hours ago, Paddywagon said:

He never really tried to find out why she shut down though.  The thing is, nowhere in the interview does he accept any responsibility whatsoever for the breakdown between them.  He didn't make any attempt to talk to her...he just whined about things.  

I admit, being with a guy like that would just drive me nuts.  

The bike ride...it seems he didn't try to converse with her like an adult and try to find out what was wrong.  There is no evidence he tried that and he doesn't mention trying anything in the interview.  He just whines about her not riding with him.

When they were in the cave they had a moment where they actually conversed and built a small, fragile connection.  And he chose to whine at her because she left the cave without him.  He totally obliterated their connection.  Yes, he had a right to bring that up but timing and tone is everything and he blew it big time.  Not only does he not bring that up in the interview but he doesn't mention doing anything to affect the relationship negatively.  

Nor does he bring up that maybe, just MAYBE, he overreacted with the surfing instructor.  

It's like he says negative things at the wrong time in the wrong tone and then gets defensive when he doesn't get a positive reaction.  Then he blames the other person for not reacting positively.

This guy needs to grow up and accept responsibility for his actions and quit abdicating blame for the problems he causes.

 I agree with you on some of this, and I especially wish he was less self-pitying, but I didn't think that particular article revealed any whining.  I do wish he would say something about wishing he had not spoken about her in the manner that he did.  I think that shows him in a very poor light. 

Quote

 I’m sure she’s a great person, I’m sure there were wonderful qualities why she was chosen. I regret the fact that we didn’t get to learn that about each other, even if it was only for the six weeks.

I don't know if the "show" decided to give Heather a villain cut or not.  She does appear thoughtful in her THs that I think were probably filmed after the breakup.  But, and this is big for me, I didn't see her really trying, ever, with Derek, so I'm more willing to give him the benefit of the doubt about his feelings.   Your mileage may vary. 

[Enero]

Sonia and Lily met during casting. They probably became acquainted during that process and turned to friends during and after. 

I finally saw the clip of Nick blowing up. Wow. That was ugly. The only good thing I can say about that is Sonia at least knows the truth now. Hopefully she doesn't spend another second in that house. She was never comfortable there anyway. His blow up, I hope, will be the incentive she needs to walk away. 

Regarding Heather and Derek, I thought the article on the breakup in The NY Times was hilarious.  I know it wasn't meant to be but I got flashbacks of Heather leaving him in the dust during the bike ride and him overacting to her touching the surf instructor. 

After Buzz made an interesting point that I think has been brought up here. They stated that Heather had a relationship in the past with an addict which was likely the reason why she completely shut down after seeing Derek "smoking." 

Edited September 15, 2016 by Enero

[gonecrackers]

1 hour ago, Enero said:

After Buzz made an interesting point that I think has been brought up here. They stated that Heather had a relationship in the past with an addict which was likely the reason why she completely shut down after seeing Derek "smoking." 

 

If so, that would definitely be a trigger & a good reason for her to want out.

[Evil Queen]

1 hour ago, cecig75 said:

I've noticed on social media that Tom, Derek, Sonia and Lilly hang out. Nick has been noticeably absent from their outings including the ones with the guys alone. I'm curious if it's a total coincidence or perhaps has not been invited?

He has, however, been promoting his rentals and clothing line non-stop! I'm hoping Sonia doesn't pull a Sam on decision day. I really like her.

I agree with others that Nick should've been paired up with Heather...they are both so dry!

Sonia and Derek would've been a much better match. Perhaps production can make something happen with those 2???

Sonia and Derek would be a bad match. Derek is just as immature as Nick. If Derek was smoking pot (which yes I still believe he was), that is the last thing someone like her would want to be around as well being she is a social worker. He is to whiny and man child like as well. Nick is way to immature I think for Heather also. They need to find her a man that was mature and had a decent, steady job. Same with Sonia too. 

It figures Nick is pushing all his rentals and clothing line. So now he can add to those sites "as seen on MAFS". SMH at them not editing all his crap out he is trying to push.

1 minute ago, gonecrackers said:

If so, that would definitely be a trigger & a good reason for her to want out.

Agree with this. If that is true about Heather then she had a good reason to want out for sure. I know many wondered if she had some relationship(s) like that before and that was what she was seeing in Derek was those warning signs so she didn't want to be stuck in that kind of bad relationship. Which in turn shows the laxed way the "experts" match...yet AGAIN! 

[gonecrackers]

17 minutes ago, Evil Queen said:

Agree with this. If that is true about Heather then she had a good reason to want out for sure. I know many wondered if she had some relationship(s) like that before and that was what she was seeing in Derek was those warning signs so she didn't want to be stuck in that kind of bad relationship. Which in turn shows the laxed way the "experts" match...yet AGAIN! 

She did say something about being past that & not wanting that kind of relationship anymore -  I can't remember her exact words but it led me to believe she's been in toxic relationships before & saw the red flags (I know I did & agree with her decision).

[psychoticstate]

14 hours ago, cardigirl said:

Eh, I didn't read much whining in that article. I don't know if it all is true, but if it is, Heather shut it down almost immediately after the wedding. He didn't stand a chance. 

I agree.  It sounds as if Heather was closed off immediately and decided that she wasn't going to give Derek a chance.

I found it interesting that he mentioned the first thing didn't seem to be the smoking but what she perceived as him being messy.  I will agree that if one person is super organized and neat and another person is extremely messy, that can create friction for both people.  But I don't think I would judge someone on their neatness/messiness scale based solely on their suitcase during a trip.  If she had made that decision after visiting his home, that's another story. 

I imagine there is quite a bit of downtime between the cameras rolling.  Even if Heather wasn't feeling it, why not speak to him while the camera isn't rolling and tell him?  Why not say "You're a nice person but I can't be with someone who ______.  So let's just build a friendship or enjoy these next ___ weeks as much as possible?"  Or something like that? 

22 minutes ago, gonecrackers said:

After Buzz made an interesting point that I think has been brought up here. They stated that Heather had a relationship in the past with an addict which was likely the reason why she completely shut down after seeing Derek "smoking." 

 

If this is true, the addict relationship most definitely should have been disclosed to the "experts" and the experts maybe should have realized that matching her with any person that engaged in a habit which could be construed as an addictive behavior would be a grave mistake.  That could be cigarette smoking, other smoking, drinking, gambling . . . you get my drift. 

This does shed a lot of light on Heather's behavior though and again, if true, makes me understand her a bit more.  I was in a relationship with an addict and I can empathize.  It's not easy.  And it does nearly terrify you to think of getting into another.  If she saw Derek's behavior/actions as similar in any way to her ex, she would have shut down and probably wanted to get as far away from Derek as possible.  And this wasn't a first date situation; they were married.

That said, unless MAFS is choosing to keep things from us, I still think Heather could have explained her feelings and actions to Derek rather than jumping on him for being messy, noticing a casino, etc.  He might have understood, he might not have.  But at least he wouldn't have been in the dark as to why she seemed so disgusted by him.

[Jellybeans]

Heather could have found a way to be friends but he smoked something one night AND quit, said he gambled but never did it in front of her, did not unpack his suitcase like she did, nor claim to chug beer like her, wanted to ride bikes together instead of going at her speed, complained about the surfer dude touching but who really cares about his feelings...he is not worthy of MAFS friendship.

Or maybe Derick is better off not being friends with her.  :-)

Edited September 15, 2016 by Jellybeans
spelling booboo

[Snarklepuss]

6 hours ago, HZAnita said:

After seeing all of that in the preview, I have no idea how Sonia can remain as seemingly friendly with Nick as she has.  His outburst in the preview kind of scared me a bit.  He seems so outwardly bland, the level of anger/frustration he showed was jarring.  I guess that's because he's been bottling his feelings up all of this time and lying to the cameras.  It's tough to live a lie.

ITA, Nick's outburst was ugly and disturbing.  It just spoke of so many destructive issues that I can't even say that he would have been better matched with ANYONE else.  The tendency to bottle up one's emotions until they erupt Vesuvian-style is very destructive to ANY relationship and I doubt he would be that way just in this situation with Sonia.  You can't even blame her because I don't think she was being unreasonable to want an answer from him one way or the other after all this time of him acting so strangely.  If she has to walk on eggshells with him for weeks on end and then when she tries to get a response he blows up like a bomb, that's BAD.  He has relationship issues in general and would not make anyone a good match as a result, IMO. 

[Jack Sampson]

55 minutes ago, gonecrackers said:

She did say something about being past that & not wanting that kind of relationship anymore -  I can't remember her exact words but it led me to believe she's been in toxic relationships before & saw the red flags (I know I did & agree with her decision).

She specifically said that her past relationships were "not nice" guys and that Derek was the opposite.  That's probably why she wasn't attracted to him.  And her lack of attraction wasn't because of smoking or gambling or arguing, she also states that she wasn't attracted to him prior to any of that.

Edited September 15, 2016 by Jack Sampson

[ctbabe]

Heather finally showed up on twitter.

[SaucyMommy]

2 minutes ago, ctbabe said:

Heather finally showed up on twitter.

Well she's pretty much saying he's a pot smoker. Ho hum. 

[cardigirl]

I like that she thanked Derek, but wonder if she was being ironic?  And she IS right about the type of community Twitter can be.  Ha ha.

[SaucyMommy]

1 minute ago, cardigirl said:

I like that she thanked Derek, but wonder if she was being ironic?  And she IS right about the type of community Twitter can be.  Ha ha.

Twitter is brutal. I still remember being blocked by season 2 cast when I called out Jessica for being an actress and ulterior motives for being on the show. HA!

[gonecrackers]

1 hour ago, Jack Sampson said:

She specifically said that her past relationships were "not nice" guys and that Derek was the opposite.  That's probably why she wasn't attracted to him.  And her lack of attraction wasn't because of smoking or gambling or arguing, she also states that she wasn't attracted to him prior to any of that.

I don't recall; she may have said it though. Derek said his 'heart dropped a little' when he found out she was a flight attendant, so it could've gone both ways there. (edited to clarify I don't recall her saying she wasn't attracted to him, but that he had a 'kind face', but I definitely could've missed it).

As far as the 'not nice' guys, perhaps she realized Derek has issues too but she's moved past relationships with that type of guy.

Edited September 15, 2016 by gonecrackers

[Snarklepuss]

I wonder if the "other factors that couldn't be portrayed" included more than just the pot smoking.  Because didn't she kind of admit it was pot smoking somewhere already, didn't she?  There could be other stuff too.

[gonecrackers]

I think her twitter feed does allude to the fact that he was a pot smoker given she said she made the right decision not just for herself, but 'for her job'.
I'm glad she mentioned there was a lot going on that we will not see, which I'm sure is the case for all of them.