S02.E33: Love the Way You Lie

[BallisticNikki]

On 10/20/2019 at 12:09 AM, Spike said:

Lead actress on Little House on the Prairie.

already discussed.

Edited October 22, 2019 by BallisticNikki

[BallisticNikki]

On 10/21/2019 at 1:37 PM, Dmarie019 said:

They are just both idiots. I am fully convinced that Vince just gets into puppy love easily and has white knight syndrome and that's why he's looking for love in prisons.  Hell it was probably Amber's idea to do the show. 

So on what grounds did he adopt Puppy? Mental illness? (Hers, not his)

[JenE4]

I can’t believe that no one mentioned Alex talking about his and Glorietta’s passionate night together, which he described as “juicy” and “tight” but then quickly commented how he didn’t want to give too many details... Too late! You gave more details than anyone ever needs to know! And I’m sorry if you all managed to block this out, I needed to unburden myself from this imagery.

Almost as bad was Shane telling Lacey’s dad that he spent the night. Why?!? This saint  of a man doesn’t need to know that! For all he knows you arrived 10 minutes prior. Nice first impression there, kid. What about John, Lacey? What about John, indeed!

This show had everything: giving up religion for jewelry, breaking up over a tire. The assumption that Michael is Michelle—but what if Michael is just Michael and is Tony’s “Puppy”?

[Keywestclubkid]

On 10/21/2019 at 2:33 PM, Empress1 said:

Maybe her ex-husband isn't in the picture? I can't figure out this timeline. She's known John since high school and I get the impression she was with him romantically at some point then. Then they were no longer together for whatever reason because we know she has an ex-husband, who I assume is the father of her kids (except John might possibly be her son's father since she cheated on her husband with John), and that ex-husband isn't in the picture at all? Is that right? 

She is a serial cheater I bet you a straw penny that she has cheated in every relationship she has ever been in. That’s what makes her cheating on maybe baby daddy in prison with fetus jailbird that has known her a total of 4 days out in the real world so funny when her dad asked him why this is different? what makes you think she won’t cheat on you when she’s cheating with you.? He’s a fucking moron for thinking she won’t with me and she’s a moron for dragging her kids in this shit ass mess. She obviously was cheating on her ex with the ex that went to jail for her to think he’s the kids dad. She’s beyond skank and really shouldn’t be allowed within 100 feet of her children without supervision (oh wait she already has that because instead of raising her own children she pawns them off on her father)

Edited October 22, 2019 by Keywestclubkid

[Unsinn]

DMARIE019 SAID:

They [Vince and Amber] are just both idiots. I am fully convinced that Vince just gets into puppy love easily and has white knight syndrome and that's why he's looking for love in prisons.  Hell it was probably Amber's idea to do the show. 

Vince moves as if through water, almost somnolent, with Darth Vader-style mouth-breathing on ‘ludes, too baffled by life and silly fantasy role-playing to be a master-con contender in a who’s-zooming-who showdown with Amber. (Hercules? There might be another email accounts as TheMightyThor and Adonis... but since cartoons and movies have yet to have been made building name and story recognition for Adonis, and thus a drooling fan base, maybe not.  Vince doesn’t strike me as a Classic Mythology aficionado. 😳)

In one of his “character interviews”, Vince stated that he and Amber discussed doing the LAL show and agreed it was a “good idea”.  As the ex-cons are not paid, and Vince is not above being on the make and scams for money, the money no doubt appealed to him.  However, while Amber’s never displayed any romantic feelings for Tony (once she was “out”), but she has always shown interest in money (while not being particularly interested in working for money).

Vince, limited emotional range that he has, appears to be sincerely baffled; he’s fulfilled all the parts on his end of the “bargain”.   Amber has fufilled none, yet she‘s the one who feels herself aggrieved, “set up”, while still continuing to accept everything the hopeful Vince gives, and meanwhile talking to/about him like he’s annoyingly clingy gum stuck to the bottom of the shoes he bought her.  Yeah, he has an “agenda”: her, and he’s not above scamming (the stupid adoptions that none were smart enough to do the minimum amount of research that would reveal were not, could never, be “moneymakers”); again, to “afford“ her and whatever he thinks will please her and inspire her to even the most lukewarm show of affection.

Has Vince been completely honest? Obviously not.  is he “hiding something”?  Probably, but probably not anything as dramatic as the show is implying and building up.  This is hardly a group given to a lot of introspection, strategic long-term planning and/or veracity, but, nearly catatonic as he seems, Vince appears “more sinned against than sinning”.  Amber is certainly “getting more” out of their “situation-ship“ than he is.  

Meanwhile, Amber is all suspicions, con-wise disbelief, comparing notes with all her like-minded friends.  She acts confused herself, as if she can’t understand why this Vince guy is involving, and continuing to involve, himself in her life, as if she doesn’t know him (she doesn’t, really, nor, obviously, does he know her), and all that past correspondence and phone calls were completely superficial, casual and platonic with no talk of a shared “future”.

With just a weak light shining dimly in Vince’s cranium (Breathe, Vince. Blink. Swallow. Repeat.), he dimly accepts Puppy (about and for whom the PDA-phobe Amber has no problems lavishing affection; again, even Puppy’s Mom is open about the girls’ relationship).  

Amber refuses to be as upfront as Brittany was in past seasons with her later-husband, Marcelino.  Brittany told Marcelino about her bisexuality and prior relationship with Amanda, and even that Amanda did try to woo Brittany “back”, and Brittany briefly fantasized about... having her cake and eating it, too (so to speak), Brittany put in effort to be honest and fair with all concerned.  In contrast, Amber, for all her suspicions and even accusations, appears unwilling to be completely honest at least about the basics: to tell Vince that, at the very minimums, she feels no chemistry with nor affection (or even respect) for Vince. 

Amber is only a bit savvier and subtler than other No-Physical-Contact/Unrequited-Affection LAL-Couple: Oyster Brain Tony and the Snaggletoothasaurus, Angela.  Confronted with Reality, especially the Physical Reality (in all its desiccated glory), Tony couldn’t face it (not that close, with no intervening glass window shield or video cam, COs or other protective measures) and just legged it, from the jump. Amber is tougher than Tony, she hasn’t run, she‘s just shrugged off Vince’s every attempt, subtle and obvious, with canny logic that appears so reasonable: what normal human being, one with whom another ostensibly normal human being would want to be in a relationship, would be willing to immediately jump into bed and full physical intimacy, with an effective stranger?

In this Amber shows herself more in control of herself and her situation than the majority of other LAL women... but that appears to be an “all or nothing” equation for the LAL ladies.  Either they can’t wait to pole-vault onto any level surface (indoors or outdoors; it must make their Gyn visits have its entomological aspects) or are human abacuses like the stoniest Madams.  Shady Lissy was not a great actress, but she gave both extremes her best efforts, draining Clint not just dry but deeply in debt with little more than peck-like kisses and squealed, wearily affected proclamations.

Whatever Amber’s actual fantasy involves, it doesn’t involve Vince at all; it’s a just in case measure.  She hedges, as if she worries there’s some kind of big payoff she’ll miss if she declares what’s apparent to everyone (except Vince).  The danger in that is in the chances of a messy ending increase (while the chance of an actual pay-off that can be kept diametrically decreases) with continued involvement.

BALLISTICNIKKI SAID:

So on what grounds did he adopt Puppy? Mental illness? (Hers, not his)

Puppy didn’t end up in prison because she’s Little Bo Peep.  If she’s not in prison for some kind of scam, like most inmates, she’s learned that game quickly.  Inmates are especially susceptible to “Magical Thinking” and “Too Good to Be True” scenarios.  They have nothing but time to dream and scheme, and like those they scam, they can be scammed, too.  As with bone-headed Cheryl wading into pond water to find money that dissolved into pulp years ago, yet who thought that money might pay “for her wedding decorations” (and also has big dreams for a grand wedding and primo ranching land with a spacious house and Longhorn cattle - will they be... pets? Expensive lawn mowers?), adoption seemed a possible money-making proposition for Amber and Puppy, even that both are legal adults (and thus far too old to qualify for any kind of State benefits, etc).

Adults can adopt other adults. There have been several high-profile cases in which fabulously-wealthy people have adopted adults; it can aid in inheritance, especially if the adopting party is disinheriting (or greatly diminishing the inheritance) of their own, biological children.  

The phenomenally wealthy Doris Duke, whose only biological child died soon after birth, lived a long and lonely life, though one of incredible privilege.  Like many of the über-rich and famous, she cld never be certain if ppl loved her, as a person, or loved what she could do for them, give them.  At one point, she became close to a woman and, convincing herself that the woman, Chandi Heffner (who had her own special skill set of accumulating extremely rich friends and spouses) was a reincarnation of her daughter, Arden (the baby who died after birth).  Heffner became Duke’s heir. They later had a falling-out, though as I recall, Heffner managed to get 65 million US$ from her late, erstwhile “mother’s” estate.  While not adopted, a longtime butler of Duke similarly challenged Duke’s last revision of her Will (changing her Will was somewhat of a hobby, another habit/weapon of the extremely rich) and - again, as I recall - ended up with what most ppl consider a bonanza that easily would rival a multi-State lottery’s winnings.

Whatever the feasible part of Amber’s situation - not being willing/able to leap into physical intimacy with an effective stranger (albeit one she lead on for a considerable period of time when she was locked up and it wasn’t an issue) - neither she nor Puppy can be exonerated of their willingness to perpetrate and perpetuate a legal fraud.  

The idiotic idea may have been Vince’s (breathe in, breathe out, blink) but nothing forced Amber nor Puppy to participate. (And while Puppy’s mother wasn’t enthusiastic about that mess, neither did she strongly or vocally disapprove, much less object).  LAL has been putting real effort into Vince being revealed as... something.  It’s probably going to be far less shocking than all the hype and build-up is implying, a big meh, revelations-wise.  It’s doubtful it’s going to be revealed that he’s on the Feds’ Ten Most Wanted List.

Amber and Puppy, for all the clucking and con worldly-wise suspicions and chatter, remain involved (in that scam), even though it’s already been revealed to be unprofitable.  Again, just in case Vince might have something worth scamming him out of, they’re willing to ride it out, for now.

DMARIE019 SAID:

But then [Shane; Lacey’s surprise contender] doesn't care about the other baby daddies [if John, the felon fiancé that Shane has unceremoniously replaced proves to be Lacey’s eldest child Marlowe’s biological father]?  How many others does she have, just one?  Not sure why that would be your deal breaker when obviously the kids have dads.

It doesn’t appear the other “baby daddies” are involved at all.  There’s never been any mention of him, or them, nor their being an “option” (or having the obligation or opportunity, nor a schedule like shared custody) when Lacey needs to take off and get her felon freak on and her penal bad boy itches scratched.  Most parents, even those with criminal records themselves, often object to their children (especially small children) being around parolees/ex-cons, especially strangers.

Nothing shown on LAL implies that the father/fathers of Lacey’s other children are involved.  There could be many reasons for this. They may have declined to be involved in the show, they may not have been considered “necessary” to the storyline (already with two felon suitors), WETv may not have had the budget or interest to include them (they don’t pay the parolees, but the “baby daddies” may be a different story), some/all may be currently incarcerated themselves... and there’s the possibility she is not certain who they are.  

However, if John proves to be Marlowe’s biological father, this gives John entré and rights to Lacey’s life through Marlowe.  If he chose to, and many people have, work out his anger and disappointment over Lacey’s lies and infidelities, his loss of their relationship (however flawed and doomed) by making everyone as miserable as possible, it would hardly be an uncommon situation.  (And the one most likely to suffer would be, as it usually is, the innocent child, who didn’t ask to be part of any of this.)

Lacey has stated, many times and in many ways, that “bad boys” are her thing.  John’s or not, Marlowe’s father is also a felon, who may still be incarcerated.  Lacey’s other sperm donors, again, if actually known, may be incarcerated as well, or maybe they’ve just have moved on, disappeared.  There’s a big difference between child support being ordered by a court, and it actually being paid. 
Non-custodial parents may have visitation; they may also choose not to avail themself of it.

Add to the mix an ex-husband who believed that child to be his; may have been, at least at one time, paying for and attached to the child.  There may be some objections/complications for Lacey and her plans there, as well.

Until recently, John believed he was headed “home” to the high school sweetheart with whom he (relatively recently) reunited and expects to parole to her home, live with her and her kids, get married and settle down to a normal, presumably lawful life... as little likelihood of that is with an Internet cam-porn star with three small children with multiple baby daddies and a parolee with a record of gun charges and anger issues.  

John may be a complete sh*tbird a**hat, but that doesn’t put Lacey in the clear for stringing him along.  Of all people, Lacey should be familiar with the terminology “it’s either in or out”.  

For all her quivering lower lip and protestations of fear, she’s stringing along a dude who’s already on the record (literally) as not having the most stable and placid personality... or impulse control.  But that, too, is part of her excitement... at least while John is still safely caged.

Now, he’s soon to be out, and the whole situation hardly sounds like a recipe for domestic bliss, especially when there are the new elements of Lacey’s deception: She wrote/romanced other inmates while engaged to John, got emotionally involved with one of those other inmates (Shane), picked him up on his (Shane’s) release, vacationed and got increasingly romantically intimate with him, all leading to the inevitable: Lacey, a well-heeled pro, predictably rocking the much-younger Shane’s world.  All within weeks of John’s release, and John knows Lacey, and not just in the Biblical sense.  

Lacey’s not only “got a thing for bad boys”, she’s got a thing for living in the midst of dramatic, emotional sh*tstorms.  (Her poor kids and father.)

[RealReality]

10 hours ago, JenE4 said:

I can’t believe that no one mentioned Alex talking about his and Glorietta’s passionate night together, which he described as “juicy” and “tight” but then quickly commented how he didn’t want to give too many details... Too late! You gave more details than anyone ever needs to know! And I’m sorry if you all managed to block this out, I needed to unburden myself from this imagery.

On 10/11/2019 at 9:39 PM, RealReality said:

YOU'VE ALREADY SAID TOO MUCH ALEXANDER!!!!!

I just want you to know that you were not alone. 

[Unsinn]

42 minutes ago, RealReality said:

REALREALITY SAID:

YOU ALREADY SAID TOO MUCH, ALEXANDER!!!!
I just want you to know that you were not alone

With you both/all. (Including JENE4 and anyone else grossed out by Alex’s puerile ”over-sharing”).

Mr Pious is all about his Faith, yet:

* Is a convicted felon.

* Has a face-full of cartoonish tats, most of them with crude imagery, which also ensure he’ll never be able to land a “straight” job , gainful/legal employment with potential to provide even a middle-class lifestyle. (However extreme Glorietta’s budget for her “Dream Wedding”, it’s probably less than it would cost to laser all that sh*t off Alex’s face and neck.)

* Has been engaging in sex outside of marriage, and describes his sexual encounter in graphic, albeit mercifully brief, terms before donning a façade of pseudo-polite reticence. (I’d think most ppl wld dump a sexual partner post haste after hearing how the details of their intimate physicality were described on national TV; international if you count the Internet.  Maybe Glorietta, for all her own professed religious attachment, is into that kind of thing and finds it complimentary.)

* The Tequila.  Alcohol is forbidden to Muslims who actually practice their Faith (and not cherry-pick). Period.  The exception is alcohol that does not come from fruit (I think), so it’s apparently all good if one decides to kick it Viking Old Style and get your “altered” on via mead (which is made from honey).  The actual rule might have meant “intoxicants” in general, but mead was not known in Old Islamic areas, and people do love their loopholes...  

All those are “rules” that are flaunted by many, but usually not by the religious, and certainly not in the very same interviews in which they speak of their religiosity and religious devotion, the contradictions, dichotomies and even hypocrisies all immortalized on videotape.  

Can’t have it both ways, Alex... either you’re a man who takes his Faith so seriously that he cannot consider a wife and children who do not share it, or you’re really an “anything goes if I like it” kinda guy.  Nothing necessarily wrong with the latter, the breaking of religious law not being the same here in the US as the breaking of civil law.  The US has the separation of Church and State. (You may want to avoid theocracies and the nations whose correct names your pseudo-fiancée seems blissfully unaware; things are dicier there.)  

You, Alex, seem fuzzy both on religious and civil law.  The sincerity of your conversion looks (very) questionable as apparently you converted for a prior girlfriend (not out of religious conviction, which probably nullifies your conversion in the eyes of adherents), while committing all these “forbidden acts”, and now making Glorietta believe you will marry her, while still in contact with your prior girlfriend (presumably the Muslim for whom you converted).  It’s highly likely you weren’t on the religious “straight and narrow” then either, no matter what religion you then professed pre-prison, as you were simultaneously off the legal “straight and narrow” as well.

Glorietta, as I’ve noted before, is a radically immature goofball stuck mentally/emotionally in adolescence, with her Bridal Book and the ease with which she is “bought” with a pawn store ring.  Alex may be in over his head with dear Glorietta.  She doesn’t seem that grounded on psychological terra firma.  Adolescents are not known for their steady impulse control and full grasp of repercussions, either.  She might bounce that cell phone off his medulla oblongata if she catches him on the phone cooing to and making plans with his ex.  I don’t doubt she could send Alex to meet God, in person, if he disappoints her.  She’s fully vested in her fantasy, “winner” take all.

[sempervivum]

8 hours ago, Unsinn said:

Alcohol is forbidden to Muslims who actually practice their Faith (and not cherry-pick). Period.  The exception is alcohol that does not come from fruit (I think), so it’s apparently all good if one decides to kick it Viking Old Style and get your “altered” on via mead (which is made from honey).

Other than brandy and wines, isn't all hard alcohol made primarily from grains or potatoes, not fruit? That would leave a big loophole for Muslims (vodka, gin, scotch/whiskey, bourbon, beer, etc would all be OK) and I don't think that's actually the case.

I think that this prohibition is much like birth control and eating meat on Fridays for Catholics: these may be the official rules, but even fairly devoted Catholics treat them as 'suggestions'.

I'm actually most skeptical about Alex's religious fervor based on NEVER seeing or hearing of him unrolling his prayer rug and facing east 5 times a day.

[BallisticNikki]

18 hours ago, Unsinn said:

BALLISTICNIKKI SAID:

So on what grounds did he adopt Puppy? Mental illness? (Hers, not his)

Puppy didn’t end up in prison because she’s Little Bo Peep.  If she’s not in prison for some kind of scam, like most inmates, she’s learned that game quickly.  Inmates are especially susceptible to “Magical Thinking” and “Too Good to Be True” scenarios.  They have nothing but time to dream and scheme, and like those they scam, they can be scammed, too.  

Adults can adopt other adults. 

The phenomenally wealthy Doris Duke, whose only biological child died soon after birth, lived a long and lonely life, though one of incredible privilege.  Like many of the über-rich and famous, she cld never be certain if ppl loved her, as a person, or loved what she could do for them, give them.  At one point, she became close to a woman and, convincing herself that the woman, Chandi Heffner (who had her own special skill set of accumulating extremely rich friends and spouses) was a reincarnation of her daughter, Arden (the baby who died after birth).  Heffner became Duke’s heir.

But those are different circumstances. (I'm not familiar w/ the story; I'm just going by what you write.) That was an older adult adopting a younger adult who played the role of daughter. I think there are only a few reasons why adults can adopt each other - makeshift parent-child relationships and caregiver-patient relationships. Maybe I'm wrong. I'm just not understanding on what grounds a judge would grant an adoption btwn a similar-age man and woman who had never actually met one another. To an outsider it sounds like a human trafficking situation. I'm just trying to understand the legal basis.

[Dot]

On 10/20/2019 at 2:20 PM, Rt66vintage said:

It's been more than 40 decades since I helped an ex-boyfriend with housing . . .

So you're more than 400 years old? Wow! Hallowe'en must be your favorite holiday. Do you dress as a mummy? Or zombie?

[RealReality]

On 10/23/2019 at 9:16 AM, BallisticNikki said:

But those are different circumstances. (I'm not familiar w/ the story; I'm just going by what you write.) That was an older adult adopting a younger adult who played the role of daughter. I think there are only a few reasons why adults can adopt each other - makeshift parent-child relationships and caregiver-patient relationships. Maybe I'm wrong. I'm just not understanding on what grounds a judge would grant an adoption btwn a similar-age man and woman who had never actually met one another. To an outsider it sounds like a human trafficking situation. I'm just trying to understand the legal basis.

Diane Whipple was mauled to death by a giant dog owned by marjorie knoller and her husband.  

Marjorie knoller and her husband actually adopted the prison inmate who had trained the dogs.  They all knew each other, but adult adoptions apparently are a thing. 

https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.mercurynews.com/2015/11/16/2001-article-killer-dogs-owners-adopt-dog-breeder-whos-in-prison/amp/

Edited October 25, 2019 by RealReality

[Kroliosis]

22 hours ago, BallisticNikki said:

But those are different circumstances. (I'm not familiar w/ the story; I'm just going by what you write.) That was an older adult adopting a younger adult who played the role of daughter. I think there are only a few reasons why adults can adopt each other - makeshift parent-child relationships and caregiver-patient relationships. Maybe I'm wrong. I'm just not understanding on what grounds a judge would grant an adoption btwn a similar-age man and woman who had never actually met one another. To an outsider it sounds like a human trafficking situation. I'm just trying to understand the legal basis.

I want to see the document TLC flashed about the adoption.  I do not understand how it is possible.

[Unsinn]

23 hours ago, sempervivum said:

Other than brandy and wines, isn't all hard alcohol made primarily from grains or potatoes, not fruit? That would leave a big loophole for Muslims (vodka, gin, scotch/whiskey, bourbon, beer, etc would all be OK) and I don't think that's actually the case.

I think that this prohibition is much like birth control and eating meat on Fridays for Catholics: these may be the official rules, but even fairly devoted Catholics treat them as 'suggestions’.

The seriously devout never take the tenets of their faith as “suggestions”, but most have the acceptance that humans are fallible creatures by design.  It’s notable though that some of the most ostensibly devout nations/people/societies, even theocracies, are often privately the most “casual” about their adherence (such as Saudi - someone please teach Glorietta that word - princes who are very much a part of the theocracy run by their family, yet are habitual users of alcohol, etc.).  

One big difference is that while Islam split centuries ago over whom was their Prophet’s rightful heir, there hasn’t really been any more recent adaptions that have been widely accepted for an ancient faith in a modern world, such as the Second Vatican, or the continuing discussions and debates regarding interpretations, nor any bipartisan theological summits between the main two Islamic sects (much less ones that have born any mutually-accepted fruit). 

I’m massively simplifying here; I wish to offend no one.  However this is a  forum for the discussing, satirizating, parsing, etc, a silly “reality” show by which we all enjoy being “entertained”,  not the complexities of religion.  As much as I believe people’s sincere Faith is a private matter and shouldn't, under usual conditions of polite society, be subject to being parsed or questioned by others, especially strangers, Alex has made his alleged piety and issue in the Alex-Glorietta relationship.  

It is indeed just that: I doubt the sincerity of Alex’s faith, such as it is.  I think he’s more the genre of people who “get religion” while incarcerated.  Part of that is “résumé-building” for parole considerations (that those up for parole have shown acceptance of their involvement in, and contrition for, their crimes; been involved in such self-improvement programs as AA, NA, etc; done some kind of charitable inner-system work, like help other inmates learn to read or study for their GED, etc etc etc). 

23 hours ago, sempervivum said:

I'm actually most skeptical about Alex's religious fervor based on NEVER seeing or hearing of him unrolling his prayer rug and facing east 5 times a day.

EXACTLY.

It’s pretty late in the relationship game to have a woman believe you want to marry her, knowing she is a Roman Catholic and you are a Muslim.  It’s not uncommon for most people, and especially those who define themselves as “serious about [their] faith”, to want to marry someone of that same faith.  This means Alex was “fishing in the wrong pond” from the get-go.

It’s one thing to have a pen pal. (Even if most of us know “prison pen pals” usually are more interested in some form of “romantic” relationship, and/or one that provides financial support as well as emotional.). If Alex was so seriously devout, he would have kept the correspondence from becoming romantic (romance under such conditions being inappropriate) and if Glorietta (who doesn’t appear to be pointiest crayon in the box) continued on a romantic theme, Alex would have firmly informed her that, as a practicing Muslim, he could not, would not, continue corresponding with her, as they could have no shared future because she was of a different faith.  Most people who practice a faith seriously (Glorietta is presumably a life-long Catholic) would not promise such a serious thing as conversion for an effective stranger... but then... most people don’t plan marriages and lifetime commitments to incarcerated strangers either, and that’s the whole premise of LAL.  

As you aptly point out, SEMPERVIVUM, for all Alex’s alleged religious concerns, LAL has yet to show any examples of, or even references to, actual religious practice; no rolling out that prayer rug facing Mecca five times a day, no interest if the food he consumes is Halal, not even a visit to a mosque, much less seeking out an imam for advice.  

Their differing religions are actually the least of the issues facing the Alex-Glorietta pairing.  There’s no foundation, barely a “story”.  There’s a difference between being “book smart” and “street smart”, between being “intelligent” and being “cunning”.  For all of Glorietta’s social blunders and superficialities, this is not that girl’s first rodeo.   

LAL is making a big deal out of Glorietta’s mother (hardly uncommon) desire for her daughter to marry someone of their own faith; Alex, though forewarned, proclaimed his faith as stolidly as if he was in the midst of circling the Kabba on Hajj, and Glorietta has passed Usain Bolt on the dash to the altar, her ire directed at her mother for anything that creates the smallest of decelerating speed bumps.  

Far more interesting (at least to me) than the manufactured religious drama is this, of the least compelling of LAL couples: what, actually, does each one of them truly want?  

Glorietta wants to be Cover Girl Fantasy Bride and a wedding to rival one of Malcolm Forbes’s weeklong parties (if she knew whom Forbes was)... okay... she says she wants children... with Alex (as apparently, she already has three?).   

Left completely unclear is what Glorietta expects as a wife, specifically, Alex’s wife (with his severely job-limiting, crude and cartoonish facial and other highly-visible tats), what she expects of life with Alex.  Even less clear is what Alex wants, period.  No clear plan there at all.  

But then, these are problems common to most of the LAL couples; the women eager and determined to be brides (and on a rock-star scale) and the parolees all facing the results of however-long they’ve been building and encouraging fantasies in one another.  None appear have any interest in the marriages they apparently promised (the immediate rising off into the golden sunset to “live happily ever after” now suddenly, albeit subtly - but not too subtle to escape notice of sensitive antennae, especially those already trying on bridal veils - pushed off to “someday” and the nebulous future, jail house proposals aside, and none have even been able to organize a steady job.  In fairness, the parolees have barely found their feet, been “outside” even a week, when their “fiancées” (fiancé, in the case of Vince) are pouring on the super-max pressure to make good on all those fantasy promises.

[BallisticNikki]

On 10/24/2019 at 12:31 PM, Unsinn said:

It’s pretty late in the relationship game to have a woman believe you want to marry her, knowing she is a Roman Catholic and you are a Muslim.  It’s not uncommon for most people, and especially those who define themselves as “serious about [their] faith”, to want to marry someone of that same faith.  This means Alex was “fishing in the wrong pond” from the get-go.

It’s one thing to have a pen pal. (Even if most of us know “prison pen pals” usually are more interested in some form of “romantic” relationship, and/or one that provides financial support as well as emotional.). If Alex was so seriously devout, he would have kept the correspondence from becoming romantic (romance under such conditions being inappropriate) and if Glorietta (who doesn’t appear to be pointiest crayon in the box) continued on a romantic theme, Alex would have firmly informed her that, as a practicing Muslim, he could not, would not, continue corresponding with her, as they could have no shared future because she was of a different faith.  Most people who practice a faith seriously (Glorietta is presumably a life-long Catholic) would not promise such a serious thing as conversion for an effective stranger... but then... most people don’t plan marriages and lifetime commitments to incarcerated strangers either, and that’s the whole premise of LAL.  

I could be wrong but I don't think Alex ever said he expected Glorietta to convert to Islam. I think he just is insisting any future kids be raised Muslim. I think he said he might have to end things if she could not agree to raise the kids Muslim. 

And when he bought her the ring, she agreed to raise the future kids Muslim. But she didn't say she would become Muslim. 

That might work for him. But Catholics aren't supposed to do that (raise kids who aren't Catholic).

[PrincessPurrsALot]

On 10/21/2019 at 7:45 AM, Kangatush said:

In the case of Lacey I just picture you directing the muppet Janice.  I'd keep asking her questions about Dr. Teeth.  

When I see Lacey's lips I think of an enlarged butthole with severe hemorrhoids. I cannot unsee that.  I really wish I could. Muppet Janice is much better looking to me. 

[KateHearts]

On 10/24/2019 at 12:31 PM, Unsinn said:

Glorietta wants to be Cover Girl Fantasy Bride and a wedding to rival one of Malcolm Forbes’s weeklong parties (if she knew whom Forbes was)... okay... she says she wants children... with Alex (as apparently, she already has three?).   

I am pretty sure Glorietta does not have any children.  Lacey and Cheryl each have three.

[AZChristian]

13 hours ago, KateHearts said:

I am pretty sure Glorietta does not have any children.  Lacey and Cheryl each have three.

Spoiler

According to WETV, she has one child.