KerleyQ

Female what, now? Oh, wait, is that where the wimmens slap each other and call each other bitches? Sonny can't help look for Morgan because he's a selfish douchebag too busy wallowing in his own feelings to be there for his son. And Morgan's dangerously in love with Kiki? Since when?? Does any of the story actually happen on screen any more? We can just find out the why of it all by reading interviews, Twitter, and Instagram?

I see Bill remains creepily over invested in Liam's relationship with Steffy. Ick.

Yeah, I don't know if being proud of your ability to love you some serial killing hitman should be some point of pride, Sam. "You have some sort of moral issue with being with a man who kills people for a living (and enjoys it). I fucking love it. It makes me hot!" I think they want us to consider it some kind of hot foreplay or something. Yep. Valerie isn't mad at Lulu for setting it all in motion. She loves her for that. She'd like to send her an Edible Arrangement (do they make a "Thank you for sneaking around to save your brother, it gave me the chance to screw your husband" arrangement?) for that. What she's angry at Lulu for is coming home and clearing things up with Dante so he wasn't ready and willing to give Val another roll in the sheets. I'm also giving the "there's no bad guy here" thing the side eye. Once things were cleared up with Lulu and Dante (with regard to Lulu's leaving town), instead of accepting that what happened between her and Dante shouldn't have happened and backing off, she paid lip service to that, but then kept mooning over Dante at work and telling him (and Nathan, and Dillon, and Jordan) about her feelings for Dante. She's not straight up Cassadine levels of evil or anything, but she's certainly not "good" here either.

Because Dom's guarantees are all filled up with contrived embarrassing shit scenes with Valerie?

Agreed. It would be so easy to say that his past is him trying to cover and overcompensate. His wanting Hope was because she was the virgin who had no interest in hooking up, so he could be her Ken doll and never have to do much beyond hold her hand and kiss her. Then, he comes back from overseas, and he's pissed at Dad about something (maybe some guy Thomas had his eye on over there saw Dad at the Pride parade and developed a crush?), so, to kill two birds with one stone, he aggressively goes after Dad's girlfriend while also aggressively hitting on everything that moves at FC. It would not surprise me to find out that he and Caroline actually didn't have sex, he just let her believe they did.

I think that Nik's driver got a text saying Patrick was on his way, but the text was faked by whoever the hell is holding Robin, so they could stage that whole kidnapping for her to watch. From what I can tell, Patrick thought he was supposed to pick her up later. (Of course, I zone out a lot of the show, so I may have missed a detail.) After thinking about it, I'd be willing to bet that an actual kidnapping was never supposed to take place, the woman was likely always supposed to let Emma go at the last second. They just wanted to scare Robin into submission. Kidnapping Emma would raise too many flags and get people actively looking for Robin instead of stupidly believing she is away by her own choice.

The card is so going to say "Dear Mom, Im sorey, Luve, Dad."

And the hair. Oh, God, the hair. My favorite part was how he's too lazy to man up and order his own damn flowers and, maybe, I don't know, call her himself and apologize? What an asshole. The best part of the episode, for me, was that the grandchild of Robert and Anna Scorpio knows to scream "stranger danger!" and fight off an abductor. (Yes, she shouldn't have fallen for the "lost puppy" routine in the first place, but at least she knew how to get out of the situation.) Bonus points that it was Tracy who came to her rescue when she yelled out and not Jason, Carly, or Sonny. (Can you just see Sonny yelling for Max to wheel him over faster?) I don't even care what Liz does anymore, because the trashing of her becomes more ridiculous by the scene, I'm just going to enjoy Becky playing the hell out of her scenes. I cackled at the Patrick/Sam scenes, but that's probably not a good thing. And while I'm no Sam fan, I thought it was pretty shitty of Patrick to not let her know why he was running out after Tracy's call. She cares about Emma, and you've planted her into Emma's life as her stepmother. You don't ignore that bond because you're pissy with her.

I was saying something similar earlier today. They brought in new writers, but they're just continuing dragging out Ron's crap. What was the point?

Maybe they'll borrow a page out of OLTL's book and go for a nice full year pregnancy, so we can really marinate in it.

Everything I've seen him do, aside from playing Ryan Lavery, I've really liked him, including this one episode stint he did on What I Like About You, where he played a guy who had a collection of stuffed animals to represent every girl he's slept with. The power of the suck of Ryan Lavery just dragged all Cam's natural charm right out of him. I remain grossed out by them trying to make Nik/Hayden OK. It's not, show. It's not.

I can't even imagine a circumstance where it wouldn't be completely bat crap crazy to have an adult pick who he will be with based on letting his overbearing shrew of a "best friend" cast the deciding vote. So, naturally, it's not off the table on GH.

Shhhh! You haven't gotten the "Liz is the worst ever" memo. Silly stuff like murder, covering up a murder, hurting the nephew Jason has always loved more than anyone else, and fucking the serial killer who terrorized Jason and his loved ones pales in comparison. Pales. On another note - I just picture JT and BM having "God this sucks so hard." and "You lucky bastard, you're getting out of this shit soon" conversations frequently. Neither seems remotely interested in the shit this show churns out.

I liked JaSam way back when they first started, when she was pregnant with Sonny's spawn. Since then, I've gone from being bored to actively annoyed by them. I'll go really unpopular now and say that, today, they did absolutely nothing for me. It's like the show is just going through the motions to get from one agenda item to the next in their wrap up of a story that should have either been wrapped up 6 months ago or never written in the first place, and BM could not be less invested in it.

Now, now, Sonny can always become Wheelchair Boxing Champion of the World.

I'm sure the tree Robin left Emma in has a vacancy.

I'm guessing that a large part of that loyalty lies more with the fans and her long time co-stars than the show (and definitely more than anyone currently running the show).

Nobody at Bloomingdales could figure out how creepy that was without getting a lot of negative customer feedback?

"You can't do that in front of the baby!!!"

I'm not surprised. I also can't say I blame him. And his mother's. That kid was screwed from the get-go.

The only way it will all make sense is if Patrick isn't Patrick. (Or if he's under some Helena mind control.)

I haven't watched all of today yet...are you all saying that Carly actually called Jason to come running because she has a problem? Like he doesn't have enough heavy shit on his plate to deal with? She really expects him to just set all that aside and come running to dry her tears and fix things for her and Sonny? Run, Jason. Run now. I did, however, see Jason saying that, from what he's heard about Jason, he's not sure he wants to be him. Please don't let that ever change.

I think they recast because they wanted someone who looked a little softer than DG. He not only portrayed an edgier Michael, the part. I think it was part of their effort to make Michael more sympathetic after his time in prison.

Is anyone on this show really a "good person"? It's mostly "this person is less awful than most of the people in town," really. For the bulk of her time in town, Liz has qualified as "less awful than most of these people."

Watching it reminds me that it was damn near impossible to feel bad for Michael getting sent to prison. He acted like such a tool at that point.