Sun-Bun

Oh I get it; not remotely disparaging the idea of charity. Never mind that these charity events are run by rich corporations with huge food donations/budgets. And I think for $150+ tickets that those donating for their attendance at these events deserve a bit more thought than chips and cold cut platters disguised as "hors d'oeuvres." But I've also seen non-charity events/parties that make this same snacks-disguised-as-hors d'oeuvres mistake. Just say snacks or bites, but don't act like those cold fish sticks being served are supposed to be just as elegant as caviar.

Here's a random pet-peeve I experienced at several events this weekend that will likely make me sound like more of a pretentious snob than usual: Hors d'oeuvres are often a very mixed bag. Your version of them are likely different than my version of them. At any rate, when an event mentions the inclusion of hors d'oeuvres, the usual expectation is one of elevated finger foods. Maybe something along the lines of say goat cheese toastpoints, BLT bites, peeled shrimp, ham sliders or chicken salad cups. With that in mind, please understand, event organizers/party hosts: Chips and dip/salsa are NOT hors d'oeuvres! Cheese cubes and crackers are NOT hors d'oeuvres! Bowls of pretzels and hummus/guacamole are NOT hors d'oeuvres! Dishes of candy/nuts are NOT hors d'oeuvres! Sliced deli meats are NOT hors d'oeuvres! Those are snacks. Or party bites. Or nibbles. Please don't get it twisted. Because lord knows my panties were beyond twisted when I went to several paid charity events in which I dressed myself up expecting some lovely "hors d'oeuvres" as promised only to be digging through bowls of Chex Mix and chips like I'm stuck at a middle school mixer event. Don't even get me started on plastic cups of cheap wine either. Ugh...

Ditto to those who really appreciated Carole this episode: she was awesome all around and reminded me of why I have such an ongoing soft spot for her. Loved her nude art show and her response to owning a piece from it((I'm in that same camp: I don't need any nude pics of myself hanging anywhere either, thanks)). Looked like a gorgeous show. Loved her encouragement of Tinsley to eat a "sexy salad" and check out those lovely apartments in her building((I adored that place with the two lofted areas despite that insane rent)). Tinsley could obviously use a fun older bestie/sisterly type to encourage her happy return to Manhattan, especially since Sonja has turned into such a jealous and controlling room mother from Hell. Loved how deftly she removed herself from the chaos of drunken Ramona railing at her at the Berkshires and trying to get her unsettled---she showed tremendous grace and class under fire and still was civil to Ramona while being a supportive friend to Bethenny. The episode's other MVP to me was Dorinda---Dorinda truly has the patience of Job. Really amazing to watch how calm and kind she was to Sonja and Ramona despite their ridiculously rude and childish behavior in her home. I kinda want Dorinda to adopt me now, or at least invite me to a slumber party at her awesome house. I promise I'd go upstairs to bed when I'm supposed to and leave her walls and beloved special lingerie alone! Ugh, Jill Zarin's thirsty ass...I haven't missed that bossy busybody one bit. Although Bobby is welcome to hang out anytime. He's still like a big ol teddy bear. Let Luann enjoy her creepy balding horndog in peace. If she's happy and doesn't mind offering him a "hall pass" now and then, no biggie. Ramona is getting messier and sadder. I think Bethenny should recommend her therapist's services to Ro, because she seems deeply broken and combative to me, desperately trying to find some purpose in her life now that her husband and daughter are both gone.

I was slightly saddened to hear Landon say that her rental house is being sold for a million bucks. I actually really have enjoyed seeing the various shots of her cute little house, which is about the only thing I remotely enjoy about Landon's scenes. Okay, and maybe her cute doggie Charlotte too.

Ramona looked soooo much better with her cute little flippy, shorter hair! It suited her face well and looked so healthy and shiny. Ramona and her Pinot Grigio: the romance never dies! ((glug, gurgle, glug...perfect sound effect up there, Bravo))

Yep, that's the old Sermet's, which JD recently "rebranded" to its current name/vibe. Maybe he wanted to cash in on the Gentry's name and have all his ventures share that same title, but I don't think it was a good move on his part. Sermet's was a lovely place that had been a respected local eatery/jazz joint for a good while; I even visited there several times before the show started and loved the ambiance and bar bites---I had a fave bartender there who made me one of the most amazing dirty vodka martinis. Wish I'd known to look out for JD around there back in the day!

This is one thing I respect a lot about Shep: he's a very practical spender and obviously uses his family money for things like funding business ventures/real estate and a bit of international vacationing. His SC money probably just funds his bar tabs/partying at this point. And he's been smart enough to avoid messy marriages/baby mama drama, so no spousal/child support woes...yet. Of all the rich guys on this show, Shep is the one who comes across as the most "Old Money" of the cast. Old Money folks don't wear fancy clothes or drive flashy cars((ahem, Craig)) or flaunt ridiculously gaudy homes. Like most of the men on this show, they're all well-educated at usually the finer institutions. And even Shep's house and his family's home/s appear upscale but not pretentiously posh. Thomas also has his Old Money ways but he's apparently made so much of his own money along the way that he can afford to be splashier with his earnings and afford the finest local real estate/interior designers. But he's never come across to me as overtly flashy with his wealth. Whitney and Patricia don't seem as Old Money to me though because they seem to so gladly bask in the riches of their surroundings. Pat is just THAT wealthy, apparently; like Muhammed Hadid wealthy. Must be nice, although I can't imagine just myself, umpteen dogs and a butler or two solely living in that huge rambling mansion.

Yep---much like her wardrobe, Ramona's taste in home decor has always been lackluster and outdated. I'm surprised her recent Manhattan apartment update looks nearly as good as it does, because it was equally as overdue for some updating for the past few years. She needs to focus on fixing up that old Hamptons house already; maybe she can get some Berkshires-chic design tips from Dorinda. Or just request to use Lu's decorator, because her Sag Harbor house is absolutely gorgeous both inside and out! Speaking of necessary house updates, Sonja really needs to somehow save up her check from this series and start updating her townhouse already. She's the only current HW who hasn't done anything to revamp her current living situation, and boy does it ever show!!

Not only are these people boring, charmless and unappealing to look at, but they apparently have flatulence issues. Two extreme fart scenes in one episode...talk about really scraping the bottom of the barrel for desperate attempts at humor. Only vaguely amusing moment of this show: drunk Shep's triumphant shouts of "Balding! Balding!" at drunk Lyle's head. For someone named Happy, that gal is the most miserable looking/acting female on reality television. Weeping at the table? Good lord, please go find some good meds and live up to your name already. Not even the Charleston gang can save this show.

Extremely uncharacteristically poor form from Patricia on tonight's episode---the way she completely froze out Kathryn at the birthday party was really quite rude, dare I say even GAUCHE. Like others here have mentioned, if she wanted to avoid a "hurricane", she shouldn't have even bothered going to the party period and simply sent along a nice birthday gift and card instead. And then to call Michael to pick her up during the birthday song?! To not even nod nor wave or even remotely greet Kathryn was just cruel; and I say that as a Patricia fan/Kathryn hater! On the flipside, I'm totally Team Jennifer here; Kathryn could've at least greeted/acknowledged Jennifer and her baby. Again, Kathryn was displaying just how sociopathic she truly is. Given how Kathryn/Patricia both acted at the party, maybe there is a shred of truth to Cooper's belief last season that Kat reminds Pat a bit of herself. They both certainly have displayed their snooty ice queen sides. I actually got a little misty-eyed when Cameron was crying to her therapist about how she knew her husband would be an amazing father and she hated to deny him of that. I used to feel that exact same way when I first was dating my now husband; I think I even had that same conversation with him in our early days together. And then we realized that parenthood was NOT for us and embraced our ChildFree lives together and have been grateful ever since. That being said, I don't think Cam was nearly as scared of motherhood as she claimed and played up her supposed indecisiveness for the show---she married a doctor, for chrissakes. Every Southern woman I've ever known who landed a doctor made damned well sure to eagerly hop aboard the baby train. It's automatic marital security, among many other things. Shep creeped me out for the first time, drunkenly barging into Natalie's place and eating up her food. Yikes dude...your aging fratboy schtick is getting almost as old as you are. No Whitney= more Patricia? I don't mind that. And I heart Gizmo.

Ever since he made the Norman Bates comparison in season 1((to which Cameron hilariously asked "Who's that?" HTF do you not know such a common pop cultural reference, Cam?!)), I've been unable to not see him as anyone *but* Norman Bates. Especially when he uses the whole "Yes, Mother" routine in conversation with her. You could just picture the dude running a decrepit hotel along with Patricia, creeping on the pretty ladies when he's not sneaking around in his mother's caftans. Sure, the dude's a little creepily awkward and a lot snobby, but I still like him overall---his deadpan delivery and snarky commentary are both often brilliant. And just for introducing the world to his glamourous mother alone is reason enough for me to like the guy---their scenes together are always a hoot.

Because she's a selfish, self-centered piece of sociopathic shit.

Group texts---God I hate them. The hate turns to burning, firey loathing as soon as a couple of idiots start continuing the conversation within the group text. Just text the main person back directly, but NOT IN THE GROUP TEXT; how difficult is this to understand?! I just had one such embarrassing group text exchange with one of my special needs students on my school cell. He literally started an expletive-laden text fight with one of my other students on an innocent group text she'd sent out to friends/family/staff. I had to text him separately to STAWWWWWPPPP embarrassing himself further because I suddenly had adults chiming in with their own "Da fuq is this mess?" confused reactions. First time I've ever had to lecture a student about the annoying evils of the group text.

Too late for that, as evidenced from her "If I were a golddigger I could've married Lou years ago" talking heads on S1. That's just a weird, wacky story right there...being a well-kept concubine apparently affords her quite the luxe lifestyle.

Oh comon, even that Peter Pan dude eventually "found his Tinkerbell" and got married. What's Whitney's excuse? ((besides the whole "because he's gay" thing))

The Basic and the More Basic.

I only follow her on Instagram because her IG stories always give interesting clues about her lifestyle. And the rich older dude is apparently still very much around((he was having dinner with her and was in her friend's IG story for a moment)), although it's weird that she doesn't mention or show him at all on her own feed. Embarrassed to still be a sugar baby?

And why in the Hell would Little Miss Drunk Stripping Attention Whore want to live in DUBAI???!!! If she thinks the "rules" are tough and locals are judgemental down in Savannah, she'll be in for quite a rude awakening in Dubai of all places, where women are still treated like second class citizens and drinking/wearing little clothing in public is strictly prohibited. She might wanna do a shitload of research on that city before she dares ever attempt to consider living there---I've had friends who went there in the past year who told me all about strange laws around there, and although it's one of the more relaxed and least restrictive of the larger Middle Eastern cities, it's still quite restrictive in comparison to lil'old laid back, open-container, drag queen-celebrating/LBGTQ-welcoming Savannah, GA!

I feel the exact same way about Landon: she may grate on my nerves and have a snooty/lazy streak, but I don't hate the gal. And she was actually very kind and welcoming to Kathryn until Kathryn turned on her with little provocation at that one political event of Thomas's she crashed, back when she told Landon to F off before giving her the finger. And I actually would've reacted much the same way as Landon did over that bitch move, with a shocked look and her astonished "Classy!" remark. Kathryn's undeservedly treated her like shit ever since that one event, so I don't blame Landon one iota for not wanting anything more to do with her nutty ass. As for her sad weepy date with her younger dude though, I truly did feel for her as well. I wasn't much younger than her when I was still quite single and drifting along feeling lonely and incomplete((found my unicorn I later married by age 34)). It's a tough place to be in, especially when you're a 35-year-old female divorcée having to compete with younger women for quality male attention---I'm sure it's twice as rough on a gal like her in a small town like Charleston, although I know she lives PT in LA as well, which is likely just as tough dating-wise in a completely different way. Half of her hippie-dipped affectations and flirting is likely due to generally low self-esteem or a facade she keeps up as her natural shield against getting hurt or showing that sad and vulnerable side. She strikes me as someone who's probably a lot more hurt inside by her past than she's willing to show anyone else---much like T-Rav.

Camels have a natural aversion to snakes, obviously.

Something I can still smell in my mind and dearly miss is the Victoria's Secret Cucumber Melon fragrance---it was green and silky smooth, and that particular flavor of VS lotion/body spray was like *the* defining fragrance of my early-mid 90's high school memories! In the late 90's they eventually stopped selling that fragrance and I never understood why because it was quite popular among all the high school girls I knew. And it felt so hopelessly glamorous and chic as a teenager to waltz into Victoria's Secret and use my PT job money to buy such a seemingly priceless bottle of scented bliss. I'd love to smell it yet again!

On a shallow note, she really needs to step away from the Botox---her face looks like that of a wax sculpture at this point.

Lord...these people were quite insanely self-impressed with their sad little "So Savannah" dinner party. They were just gushing and preening and gasping with self-importance like they were at the Met Gala. Which tells me that they obviously don't get out to very many fancy dinner parties all that much. Also, Lyle is a gross snob. Who cares if Ashley works a random side hustle at Delta? Good for her; why does she even need to mention one of her extra gigs to anyone? She said she was busy "working"---that's more than enough info for anyone she's just met to know, so he can get over his nasty balding self already. And take his nasty drunk cheater of a girlfriend who isn't even into him along for the ride.

All the amens!! That man always seemed a little shady and off to me...something about him just didn't seem 'right.' Maybe it was the over attachment to his parents, maybe it was his passive-aggressive little jabs at Bethenny, maybe it was the fact that he was still single and unmarried by that age((sorry to sound sexist, but usually there's good reason for a man being single for that long versus a woman)), or maybe it was just the fact that he was so willing to aggressively jump upon Bethenny's gravy train((because let's face it: she's obviously a bit of a romantic challenge as well))....I just never bought into his whole nice guy schtick and thought he was way too easy to snap on Bethenny when things weren't going his way. Even Bethenny tried to say on camera that nobody ever saw his bad side and that she was usually left looking like the bad guy. As for his parents, I always thought they were wayyyy too clingy and expected wayyyy too much of Bethenny. They sure didn't come off like a genuinely supportive family but a suffocating and clueless unit that didn't even consider anyone's comfort but their own. Yes it's sad that they had once lost a child and were thus hoping to enjoy plenty of grandparent time, but they way overstepped their boundaries and Jason didn't seem to find anything remotely weird about that. Go figure that he turned out to be a mentally unstable nightmare of an ex. I'm not a huge Beth fan or anything, but even I side with her over him and his weirdly entitled behavior.

I'm gonna assume Tinsley's weird angry Chola brows in recent years are the result of excessive Botox around her eye area, because her outer brows sure didn't slant upwards like that in older photos/videos of her. Isn't there a term for that, like "Botox Brows"? Damned shame she's already hitting the facial work hard because it's actually aging her. Everything else about her seems so youthful, so I wish she could take a cue from her well-preserved roomie Sonja and learn how to enjoy some facial restraint. Even Carol would look much younger if she'd step away from the facial fillers/Botox. Much as I admittedly love Tinsley's hair/extensions though, she could definitely use a hair update just to freshen her look up and soften her face a bit more---I think she'd look far more chic and stylish with a shoulder-length funky bob. I give Carol and Bethenny major kadooze for getting fresh haircuts and switching up their looks for a bit, as opposed to desperately clinging to the long, heavy Barbie doll extensions look favored on these HW shows. I actually love the fact that this cast isn't afraid to rock fabulous shorter hairstyles.