Bastet

Favorites: Small Potatoes - Because this is flat-out hilarious from beginning to end. Never Again - Because we finally get to see Scully delve into her frustrations. And, you know, get it on with a hot man. Leonard Betts - Because Paul McCrane makes LB one of the show's most sympathetic villains, and Gillian gets to say pages worth of dialogue with the look on her face and hesitation in her step when he tells Scully, "I'm sorry, but you've got something I need." Memento Mori - Because, horrible voiceovers aside, it crawls right inside my heart and takes up permanent residence. Unruhe: Because it has an even more sympathetic villain in Jerry, and I adore Scully as an investigator in this one. I have to cheat and do an honorable mention: Paper Hearts - Because it's a Muldercentric episode even this devout Scullyist can adore. Least Favorites: The Field Where I Died - Because it sucks. As I said above: Kristen Cloke can't act, DD can't cry, and while Morgan and Wong can write they don't do it very well here. Zero Sum - Because it has zero Scully. El Mundo Gira - Because it's John Shiban. Teliko - Because literally the only thing I remember is Scully in that white shirt, crawling through something to get to a drooling Mulder. Unrequited - Because it's boring.

"Keep it up, Mulder, and I'll hurt you like that beast woman." It's in response to his teasing her by throwing her "Unlike you, Mulder, I would like to have a life" remark back at her when she decides to accompany him to the Smithsonian. I also love when she springs him from the drunk tank, saying it's easy to see how they mistook him for a vagrant, and he asks if she's going to rag on him or take him to get some food. "Am I buying, or did you manage to panhandle some spare change while you were at it?"

Scully climbing in and out of an elephant's body via ladder to do the necropsy will forever be my favorite part of that episode. While Space is awful, I do love Scully's teasing Mulder about his fanboy ways. "Didn't you want to get his autograph?" and her line about getting a pony and learning to braid her own hair are just about the only things the episode has going for it.

I rarely eat fries, but when I do I always ask for them well done (or "extra crispy"). I hate potatoes, and the only way I'll eat them is as french fries - and only if they're thin cut and very crispy, so that they no longer taste like potatoes. They're just a crunchy vessel for my ranch dressing intake, basically.

It is stuff like that and "anti-gravity is right" that make me love Season One Scully so much. Scully growing more somber and reserved as the years went on makes sense given all the shit they put her through, but they didn't have to ditch the dry humor. Or the casual clothes. Better casual clothes in later seasons would have been nice, sure, but I'll take the Scully sitting with her sister at the kitchen table in a giant denim shirt and sweats over the Scully who doesn't even unbutton her suit or take off her shoes to slog through hours of videotapes in her hotel room.

Beyond the Sea is my favorite episode of the season, and I love it just as much for its impetus as its execution (heh, pun unintended) -- Morgan and Wong were the ones who actually stood up and said that to have Scully do little more than conduct autopsies and object to Mulder's theories was a hideous waste of some obvious yet unexploited acting talent and purposely set out to write an episode in which Gillian got something to do. Ghost in the Machine is terrible, but as I've said before, I just can't hate it. First, for the elevator blow job from the gag reel, but also for little flannel-clad Scully crawling through the duct work and making an impossible shot to save the day. If I was making a list of ten instead of five, I'd add Deep Throat, The Pilot, Eve, The Jersey Devil and Lazarus. But then that leaves out The Erlenmeyer Flask and EBE. I'm going with an even dozen.

Strange Fruit was one of those episodes you knew was going to be an emotionally difficult one just based on the title (that song is wonderful, but hard to listen to), and it delivered. The actor playing the little girl did a great job in the car, but the actors playing the '60s versions of the victim and his friend/girlfriend (I can't remember if they were dating) were the real standouts for me.

I only get five? :-) Favorites: Beyond the Sea Ice Darkness Falls Squeeze Tooms Least Favorites: Space Space Space Space Space Okay, really: Space Shapes Miracle Man Born Again Young at Heart

The house-flipping shows have their own thread, so now we have one for discussing the commonalities (and differences) among the various real estate shows -- House Hunters, Property Virgins, Buy Me, My First Place, etc. What drives you crazy about all of them? Which type do you prefer? Do you think the shows all dip into some giant applicant pool of whiny, entitled buyers? Do the real estate agents get to be snarkier on certain shows? Are hosts a good thing, or do you prefer an unseen narrator? Et cetera, et cetera. For the sake of my blood pressure, I had to stop watching the shows that delved into the buyers' finances. Watching people who'd only bothered to save up the real estate equivalent of pocket change for a down payment demand that the sellers pay their closing costs was just one annoyance too many.

I don't think it's confusing, and think it's telling that when the category does not happen to include any clues about female authors, it is not titled "Male Authors," but simply "Authors" (perhaps with some descriptor indicating genre, era, or the like). Of course, based on the show's history, if they did do such a thing it would be "Men Authors," so it would still annoy me even if it no longer offended me. I was watching an old episode of Law & Order: SVU last night, and heard a guest actor say "calvary" instead of "cavalry." I thought immediately of this thread, having just discovered it yesterday.

No, I wouldn't. Which is why I'd never look at such a home while house hunting. If I did, with general knowledge of the restrictions (which doesn't require reading the CC&Rs, but simply looking around) and then complained about the existence of such restrictions, I'd look like an idiot. Like she did.

That drives me nuts. I wouldn't live in a single-family home governed by an HOA if you gave it to me, so I certainly understand the "What do you mean I can't choose my own paint color?!" style of objection, but those of us who feel that way know not to look at houses in cookie cutter developments. To opt to tour such a home and THEN make the objection is just plain stupid.

Mannequin is nothing, ya'll -- my best friend and I saw Vibes in the theatre. And not that any network airs that Cyndi Lauper/Jeff Goldblum masterpiece, but if they did - I would still watch it. Because it's Cyndi Lauper and Jeff Goldblum. As psychics. On the trail of some secret mountain that contains all the universe's psychic energy. Which causes Cyndi Lauper to speak in tongues. That's gold, Jerry - gold.

My "noun as verb" pet peeve is coupon. Nails on a chalkboard. I also hate when the Jeopardy! clue writers use "woman" as an adjective. They like to have categories such as "Women Authors." It's fundamentally offensive because it presumes that authors are men by default, but it's also just plain annoying because if they're going to persist in such nonsense they should use "Female Authors."

Chris Meloni. I first saw him on NYPD Blue, where he played an awful person, and it caused such a disconnect for me because I found the actor so magnetic I kept forgetting the character was slime. Pierce Brosnan obviously became a movie star and has aged like a fine wine, but my crush on him was at its height during Remington Steele. (My all-time crush is Cary Grant, and Brosnan as Steele was reminiscent of him.) Mike Rowe from Dirty Jobs, but the stumping for Romney took care of that. Jon Stewart. Benjamin Bratt (I recently saw him in a syndicated episode of Modern Family, and he looked as good as he ever has.) I watched The Practice almost exlusively to look at Dylan McDermott. Among women, I think Cybill Shepherd is one of the most beautiful people on the planet, especially during the Moonlighting era. And my X-Files era girl crush on Gillian Anderson has only grown stronger.

I'm one of those peevish holdouts on less vs. fewer, so watching TV - especially commercials - can be quite aggravating. A few years ago, Mercedes ran a commercial for a coupe, touting more power, more this, more that and then ending with "less doors." I'd have to change the channel lest my blood start (figuratively) boiling. The oft-noted use of "and I" in place of "and me" is also a major irritant, and it seems just as widespread on television. Characters saying "imply" when they mean "infer" (or vice versa, but it seems more common that way) bothers me, so I enjoyed an episode of Law & Order: SVU in which Munch corrected someone. I'd like to drop Munch into a few shows with characters who don't understand the difference between inter and intra. Like several others, I'm tired of hearing just about anything described as "amazing," but what bugs me even more is "awesome." Thanks to Eddie Izzard, I say to the television, "It's the dog's bollocks, that's what it is."

This is not my style of food at all, but I've made it as comfort food for those who do like this sort of thing, and they have loved it. I think it's tailor-made for the unadventurous eater. This yields a ton, because the idea behind the recipe as given to me was to freeze half for later; unless you want to do that, too, cut it in half: NEOPOLITAN BEEF CASSEROLE 1 T oil 1 large onion, chopped 3 cloves garlic, chopped 4 medium-sized carrots diced 1 ½ lbs. lean ground beef 10-ounce box of button mushrooms, sliced 2 (6-ounce each) cans tomato paste 1 28-ounce can plum tomatoes, broken up 2/3 cup dry sherry 1 ½ tsp. each, salt, sugar, dry basil and dried oregano ½ tsp. Each, pepper and garlic powder 1 lb. elbow macaroni 2 10-oz. packages frozen chopped spinach, thawed and drained 10-ounces extra-sharp cheddar cheese, grated Heat oil in a good-sized dutch oven type pan over medium heat. and sauté onion, garlic and carrots until onions are golden, about 5 minutes. Add beef and cook, stirring, until browned and crumbly. Halfway through, add the mushrooms to get them started cooking. Add tomato paste, tomatoes and their juices, (break them up with a spoon), sherry, and all seasonings, and cook, uncovered for about 30 minutes, or till somewhat thickened. Cook macaroni in boiling salted water, according to package directions. Al dente is best, as it cooks further in the oven. Drain well and mix with the drained, squeezed spinach. Layer half of the macaroni mixture in a lightly oiled large lasagna pan. Top with meat sauce and ½ of the cheese. Repeat layering, ending with the last of the cheese. Bake uncovered in a 375 degree oven for 35-45 minutes, or till bubbling.

How could I forget In-N-Out given the fuss so many people make over it? That's another one I've tried -- the law school I attended would bring the trucks in on the last day of classes each year to treat the students before finals started. I ate it, sure, because no one paying for law school turns down free food, but it was simply a decent fast-food burger. NOT something to cross state lines for.

I like the "Maternal Reflex Technology" part of that ad, because to this day - decades after I stopped being a kid - if my mom has to stop short while I'm in the passenger seat that arm comes out. I've had friends who are moms do that to me, too. "Sorry, force of habit."

I'm sick of the sob stories and over-scheduled teens, but I liked the group of kids in this latest round in terms of how they interacted with each other. Especially the two who made it to the dessert round.

My favorite lines from DJ's religious phase come when he explains he has been going to church because he had questions about "God and stuff" and Roseanne says he should have come to them, since there is no one better to answer his questions than Roseanne and Dan. DJ: Okay. What religion are we? Roseanne: I have no idea. Dan? Dan: Well ... my family is Pentecostal on my mom's side and Baptist on my dad's. Your Mom's mom is Lutheran and her dad was Jewish. DJ: So what do we believe? Roseanne: Well, we believe in ... uh ... being good. So, basically, we're good people. Dan: Yeah, but we're not practicing

Ice cream made with fresh vanilla beans, yes. With "natural flavors," no. I only like flavors that are made from a vanilla base -- cookies and cream, chocolate chip cookie dough, vanilla chocolate chunk, etc. Even something I like - mint, chocolate, strawberry, peanut butter, etc. - I do not like as an ice cream flavor, only as an ingredient mixed in with vanilla ice cream.

And an animal lover, who adopts rather than buys and helps low-cost spay/neuter programs (he provided the artwork for California's "Pet Lovers" license plate).

This was an example of how situations we've seen a thousand times on television can still be gripping if we care about the characters. I was really into everything that happened once Jane found the girl. Having said that, though ... It wasn't necessary to make that girl so utterly perfect for Jane - and us - to care about her. I suppose next week we'll find out she reads to blind puppies in her spare time. Maura - as a doctor and her best friend - would have known by her voice Jane was in pain, and asked her about it. It wouldn't change anything in either's course of action for Maura to know Jane was likely suffering a miscarriage, so having her accept Jane's "I'm fine" just made her look daft. As obvious as it was, it wasn't overdone, though; kudos to Angie Harmon for not over-acting any of it. That vest was ridiculously short, and they even made a point of her pulling it down. New Boyfriend needs to have a seat. "I want to help." Do what, Professor? You're just wasting time. I did like the three of them in the beginning, though, and loved Jane telling Maura to relax instead of spending the whole time wondering if they were enjoying themselves. That is the world's slowest elevator, and quite impressive in that it can continue to run after Jane cut power to the entire building. A hitman who can hit an eyeball through a peephole can certainly hit at least one of two downed targets, so the fact they were able to get back inside without being shot again was ridiculous. I'd say maybe he's only good at close range, but he plucked the two of them off just fine with his first two shots. The scene between Maura and Angela had an off vibe to me, almost awkward - it was if those two had never acted together before. And is there anyone who didn't know a) Angela was going to clean the ball a little too well and b) it would turn out she'd bought a replacement dress? No big deal, just quite predictable. I'm sure next week will be one cliché and inaccuracy after another, but hopefully by the time it's over we're back to normal.

Or even bother to learn what she actually did and why, but she lays it all out here.