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I don't think Virginia's dog looked better behaved with Erik. I thought Virginia's dog looked subdued. Rockie didn't even react when she spoke in a high voice and rubbed his face; he just stood there. Taken together with Erik's controlling nature (if you have any problem with my work schedule, we're DONE! DONE!) and his behavior when he met Ryan walking Clara's dog (Rockie wanted to play, Clara's dog seemed fine, Erik yanks Rockie away, keeps yanking on the leash, saying impatiently "stop," at one point the leash was so short Rockie's front legs were off the ground. This is a guy who has a dog so it's not like he's unused to being around dogs), it makes me worry about what happened to make that poor dog so "much better behaved." Also, is Erik a kamikaze pilot? Is his cockpit super-small? Is that why his arms are always held so close in front of his body & his shoulders hunched like he's waiting for someone to hit him? They should give him a bigger plane. His posture's been permanently affected by his job.

But according to Jake, in all his past relationships, the women were crazy and completely at fault. Just like when Haley's friends asked him in the kitchen what went wrong, he said something like, "We were intimate, and then she pulled back, it was confusing." He tends to leave things out, like his crazy accusations, like the way he did w/whatever he did in all the relationships with those "crazy" women. I'm still repelled by his T-shirt ("Stop Complaining . . . Get a Job," which makes me think his love for the 80s might really be a love for Reagan but the show is trying not to be political). If they've talked politics and her politics don't match his, that could also be a reason for her obvious discomfort.

I no longer think Amira is too good for sweaty, selfish Andrew. She's beautiful, but dumb as a rock if she actually told Mexican immigration what she was there for. All that, "I don't know what happened." She's as stupid & annoying as he is. I'm not saying she deserves him, cos no one deserves that, but he's on her level. Harris hit the jackpot. He said he's an agricultural worker. Imagine the life of an agricultural worker in Belize. You work 15 hour days amid toxic pesticides under the hot sun, go home to your shanty to eat subsistence food. Then you get this call from a crazy, rich, high American. No wonder Harris said he traveled all day & night to get to that hotel. Even if she doesn't bring him to the US, the gifts she's promised him are probably worth more than he makes in a year. And she knows all of that. She's no better than Big Ed. At least she hasn't told him he has bad breath on camera.

And he wore that T-short that said "Stop Whining . . . Get a Job." What a great, compassionate guy. He's more worthless than he thinks the "whiners" are. May he be in their shoes someday.

I'm delighted this was renewed. I LOVE this bunch (except for Mary who is NOT earning her paycheck). They're like OC meets NJ. I love their delusions of grandeur. Their belief that having money makes them classy and fashionable (hah!). Their inability to self-examine at all. Their copious & uninhibited alcohol consumption and their behavior as a consequence thereof. And Brooks. C'mon. Brooks! When Brooks was whining about going back to college you know he was waiting for Mummy Meredith to say, "No, Brooks, you don't need to go back to school. You're a STAR now!" I love my SLC Ho'wives!

Yes, leaving your minor child homeless and pregnant is a good way to teach her a lesson. She'll learn about homelessness, poverty, prostitution, rape, all sorts of good lessons her mother & the street will teach her. And her mother can be proud because she did not change her mind because changing your mind and having compassion is the worst thing anyone can do. Her mother took on the responsibility of raising Myrka 16 yrs ago; she doesn't get to throw a tantrum & opt out when it doesn't go the way she wants. And excusing her by saying, "She didn't want Myrka to ruin her life so she kicked her out." Is absurd on its face. I didn't want you to ruin your life so I nuked it before you could? Is that supposed to be the good mom thing? Or even the logic thing? My god, the stuff that happens to homeless kids.

I'm pretty sure there's a barn somewhere on the property concealing corpses of young women they thought would adapt better. They just seem like that kind of family. I'm picturing Brandon like the female lead at the end of Get Out: Robotically eating one cheerio, sipping from a glass of milk, then back to the dating sites again: "Want to date swm and play with cute animals?"

He can move in with Tyra's mom. He can move in with a friend. He can fight to keep his mom's online boyfriend out of his daughter's house. He can be a dad.

Exactly! Christina did turn out to be incredibly problematic but to judge her based on gossip gleaned from Trishelle (!) & others on the first night of meeting her is f'ed up. Everyone has a story & to just shut down & never give her a chance to tell her side of things is an asshole move, just what I'd expect from Henry.

"Okay, Christina is a wacko, no question ("I have been loved deeply by many" -- yikes) but Henry has refused to talk to her since the wedding & the only accusations of his that we've actually seen confirmed were the rudeness to production and that amounted to 3 occasions: when production was forcing her to carry conversations for mute Henry or when production was directing a conversation at the party. I can understand why over weeks of shooting & carrying the entire relationship Christina would have 3 moments of frustration. We've seen no evidence of the homophobic text b/c Henry says she says she lost it. As the accuser, the burden of proof is on him. She's annoying but she's been nothing but patient while he has been unrelentingly rude & obnoxious with his "pattern of deception" bullshit. Lots of flight attendants don't have one established domicile, Henry, you asshole. God, I hate him." Okay, that comment from last week didn't age so well. The first & last words are true but was I off-base about everything else. I'm going to paste this on my forehead to ensure I never serve on a jury, Off to mix up some flour & water

ALS is horrible, for the patient & their loved ones, no question. Please know that I'm not doubting that at all. But is it really "opening up" & "revealing" yourself to say that your dad, someone who is not you, has it? Basically, she "opened up" & told Matt where she lives & what she does with her time & that she's close to her family ("Family is everything to me," said 3 times by my count, 4 times by my partner's). That's not all that revealing, is it? Bri revealed things about what she looks for in relationships and why, her insecurities, & what she feels has been missing in her life that she hopes to make up for in the family she'll create with her husband. The other woman said she brushes her dad's hair, which is sweet but it doesn't tell me a lot about her, except maybe that she likes to sit still & make repetitive arm motions. I have no idea what Matt was so blown away by her revealing unless it was her blue eyes, downcast glance, and shy smile. I know they're not there to make friends (tm every reality contestant ever) but it really irritates me when they know the lead is asking about a baseless accusation & the others don't stand up & defend the person accused. It's not getting in the drama, it's putting a stop to the drama. It's showing the drama starter that all of you, as a group, will not put up with their shit. Rather than whining that Victoria stole their time with Matt, they all could have marched in, told Matt it was about Victoria, not Marilyn & said, "Now let's go on with the party." They have no one to blame but their passive selves if they didn't get to talk to him.

Tyra's sister is so angry! Last season it was all laughs and, Look at the three of us all having babies together. Not so much now that they're here. Tyra is doing absolutely the right thing, getting an education, leaving her child with its father. It's stupid Alex who won't step up & his grandmother who won't control who's in her house. It sucks that childcare falls on the sister & the mom right now but in 4 years Tyra will be able to get a better paying job than if she'd stayed home with the kids. And the last thing I needed was an update on sad-sack Hailey 1, which was hardly an update since her life is virtually the same. So now I resent Tyra's sister for 2 things.

Here's the thing with Brett & his "sarcasm." It's not sarcasm, it's irony. Sarcasm is a subset of irony. Sarcasm is when you say, "Nice dress," in a tone that means, "What were you thinking when you put that on?" Irony is broader, pointing to a break between what is meant and what is said. The second Bush admin was famous for its irony. For example, the Clean Air Initiative which allowed more industrial pollutants or the Healthy Forests Initiative which -- you guessed it -- allowed increased logging in previously protected old-growth forests. Irony is generally used for a purpose. With sarcasm it's humor or cruelty. With the Bush admin it was political obfuscation. With Brett, tho, what is the purpose? He uses it constantly as a deflection but often there's no discernable meaning behind it. As, for instance, in this totally made-up scenario: Someone: I like this ice cream / I'm glad it didn't rain Brett: Yeah, really good ice cream / Yeah, so great it didn't rain What's the purpose of ironizing here? We communicate to exchange thoughts & information. Brett communicates nothing; he just throws words out, meaningless words, lots of them cos he loves the sound of his own voice. I had a friend in college who had a great insult which I'm about to steal: Brett is the null set.

Okay, Christina is a wacko, no question ("I have been loved deeply by many" -- yikes) but Henry has refused to talk to her since the wedding & the only accusations of his that we've actually seen confirmed were the rudeness to production and that amounted to 3 occasions: when production was forcing her to carry conversations for mute Henry or when production was directing a conversation at the party. I can understand why over weeks of shooting & carrying the entire relationship Christina would have 3 moments of frustration. We've seen no evidence of the homophobic text b/c Henry says she says she lost it. As the accuser, the burden of proof is on him. She's annoying but she's been nothing but patient while he has been unrelentingly rude & obnoxious with his "pattern of deception" bullshit. Lots of flight attendants don't have one established domicile, Henry, you asshole. God, I hate him.

I've never forgotten Mike stomping around around the streets of Ukraine in his pajamas, sulking over some perceived slight searching for red Solo cups of beer, drunkenly asserting something or other to the camera. Followed or preceded by their having a lovely coffee together, discussing why it was taking so long for Natalie's visa when out of nowhere he began berating her for being a liar, for having done this before, for being a prostitute, for being a criminal, for being who-knows-what. As far as I saw, that fight was never really resolved, just sort of ignored until the interview when Natalie said, With so many fights, who knows if I love him? And then she became the big problematic psycho. She's weird about stuff and high strung but Mike's the one who was living with an axe murderer (okay, exaggeration . . . barely), who drinks to excess, is given to baseless rages, refuses to get food for someone he'll have living with him, and refuses to heat his house. Team Natalie ever since the coffee shop.

I've changed my mind about this. I've now fallen in love with Brooks. He's so over-the-top absurd. Tape on mass-produced sweatsuits, the lip gloss, the voice. It's all so . . . Brooks! He might be my fave character now on any housewives show. I realized this after watching the first Atlanta episode which practically put me to sleep. I hate him, of course, but in a glorious way, a way that lights my life during these dark times, making me say, "Bring me more Brooks!"* * not to be confused with cancer-scam Brooks who I will never want more of unless it's to see his mugshot next to Vicki's

Ethan's parents should sue Myrka's mom for child support since they're raising her minor daughter.

Yeah, but I've been watching since the first season & I learned so much from this episode's narration. Did you know that most couples on honeymoons have known each other for a long while but these couples got married at first sight so they have to take time for in-depth conversations so they can get to know each other? Fascinating! Also, these couples got married at first sight -- who knew?

How you dress, i.e., gender expression, isn't about what you wear it's about who you are.

Oh my god, that actually is what we saw. It's not even snark.

It's interesting that Myrka's mom kicks her out b/c Myrka needs to feel consequences for mistakes she's made. Shouldn't, by the very same logic, her mom have to take care of Myrka & her child because of whatever bad parenting led to the current situation? Shouldn't the mom have to feel consequences & not get a free ride by shoving the responsibility onto someone else? Why should Ethan's parents pay for the mom's mistakes? Or why should Myrka pay for the mom's mistakes?

He was right about the oGulating, though, right? I was so pissed when Myrka's monster/mother said, "I'm not raising somebody else's children," in reference to her daughter's pregnancy. Bitch, you aren't even raising your own child. You've abandoned your minor child to homelessness if not for incredible luck. And, if not for Ethan's parents, her homelessness almost guarantees her continuing to be sexually active, if only so she can find places to sleep. Thanks, Mom, that's some quality parenting.

Talented Fundie wedding videographer/photographers can make good money. Other fundamentalists won't use "worldly" photogs/videogs cos of the SIN & most fundie kids are educated like the Plath kids (picture a photography class akin to Kim's ballet class). If Olivia knows what she's doing she's a giant fish in a small pond.

These three dates! Producers: Ok, for Ivan, who we really want everything to go the best for, we'll put him & Tayshia in bathing suits! Sexy! Then we'll dump them in separate tubs. Less sexy! Filled with ice! For over 5 minutes! With Chris H & some rando hanging out, commenting on every moment! Then we'll stick them in an air stream! Yeah, that'll be a really romantic date. Then for Brendan, who we also really like & want things to work out for, we'll stick him & Tayshia in a tiny room with Neil Lane droning on about his overpriced jewelry, repeating the words infinity & eternity infinitely & eternally. What could be more romantic? Then, I don't know, hmm, for Zac, I guess the best we can do is strip them down to their underwear, slather them in slippery stuff, & tell them to roll around and make out. Then we'll send them to a suite you could fit 4 air streams inside. Gee, I hope they can manage to make something of these awful conditions. Yeah, the heavy hand of production was in no way visible here.

I thought the scenes with Max & Moriah, from hanging the lights to waltzing to kissing, were lovely. Yes, she's dressed ridiculously & her make-up is a mess and she's emotionally unprepared for just about everything. But she's a sweet girl who seems to be finding incredible strength to tear herself away from her toxic background & Max seems nice enough & smitten. I hope they're able to have fun & help each other mature safely away from Kim and Barry. Is a girl's wardrobe and make-up really enough for us to wish unhappiness upon her or start calling her a slut? Do we really need to morally police girls' & women's appearances like that? Doesn't that sound like stuff Kim & Barry would do?