Sofa Sloth

I’m not sure why that ‘job’ was so difficult for her either, it’s not like she bothered to put a scrap of makeup on or make herself presentable for tv throughout the last few seasons, she’s looked like a hot mess. Most TV personalities work on their appearance or have to learn lines and you can attribute all that to ‘work’, but for Maddie - a camera just followed her round a few days while she lived her sloppy life, it was hardly a stressful 9-5. She’s Janelle’s child for sure.

Reviews of these https://au.trustpilot.com/review/toribellecosmetics.com Poor woman that are buying these could have beautiful individual eyelashes that last 2 weeks applied by a professional for way less than these cost, or even go buy some from a genuine shop not from ol’ Mare who takes her 30% mark-up cut, before pressuring you to join her team and sell them too. Of course it’s not even about the product at all anyway. Sellers like Meri are only interested in recruiting other sellers, so she can climb the pyramid to make money. If she had a genuine interest in selling products, she’d open a legit business.

It really does. It looks like she’s attempting to make herself into Gene Simmons. Just awful application and very unflattering look, but sadly she has sycophants who are ready and willing to part with their money and sign up to her scam, even if she does look like a member of Kiss.

Disgusting pyramid scheme pushing grifter just like her parents. Why work a real job selling clothes, when you can easily manipulate and scam your fans into your downline and have them work for you?

More pyramid schemes - this one I believe is Tori Belle, (though she’s not straight up said yet). It’s a newish start-up MLM, so despite looking like a spider-lashed drag queen, she’ll probably shoot right to the top of the pyramid by scamming all her followers into her downline and they’ll all lose money to make her rich. I really hate these disgusting Brown vultures. They all need to get real jobs and stop sponging off their innocent fans.

Why would these twat waffles who self proclaim to be ‘financially drownding’, pay an absolute fortune to store their stuff on moving trucks for a month, when they could quickly unload truck contents into garage within an hour or two, storing there and just loading up again if they didn’t close in a month. Pure laziness, no wonder they’re ‘drownding’. Of course self-important Robyn thinks Janelle’s concerns are about all her, ugh it’s not always about you Robyn! 🙄 She is so is hypersensitive and bitter about the fact the family was functioning for nearly decades without her and bummed she can’t rewrite their history to insert herself no matter what she tries (creepy portrait anyone?). Meri actually looks nice in the talking heads, I like her hair. Pity she looks like a frumpy hot mess in the other scenes. Of course Meri wasn’t available to meet Maddie’s baby, because she was away ‘on business’. Sure Jan, nothing to do with the fact you two have had an obvious rift, since the great Twitter meltdown/ Lularoe fallout of 2018.

Taking bets as to what treats the ol’ Mare will send out to her minions. Will it be the homemade stale rice crispies? Pre-sucked blowjob bananas? Will she send flowers from the meaningless obligatory bouquet that Kody will unceremoniously shove at her on Valentine’s Day, in front of the other wives? The suspense is killing me.

Ok. Rewatching Aspyn’s wedding episode and Mitch’s mom kindly offered to use her expertise and create hats (as Aspyn requested they wear). Ughh Meri of course wanting an ‘super edgy, statement piece’ hat. Groom’s mother Hannah then lovingly creates her that custom ‘edgy statement piece hat’ (at no expense to her either I’m sure). All wives are good sports when the hats are revealed and are grateful for their creations... and then there’s Meri. Complaining and outright rude. Keeps groom’s mother up at midnight on the wedding eve, to alter it to her particular specifications. Like bitch much? So it’s not your dream hat, just say ‘thanks I love it’, suck it up, wear it and be thankful! It’s not like it’s HER wedding, or even her bio kids wedding. Noone cares what you wear Meri, it’s not about you. Such a diva. The worst part is, what does she end up with after keeping poor Hannah up all night, recreating her hat? A super simple, plain fascinator type headpiece I see on sale in any mall. Nothing ‘edgy or statement piece’ at all. Meri is a contrary selfish straight-up cow.

I would watch the heck out of that show 😆 I’m invested in this show for the dysfunction and to catch glimpses of the real fillin’s they suppress. I want to see those moments that get rill, where they aren’t all guarded with their walls up. We’ve been shown time and time again by the Brown women, they would rather a monogamous relationship (whether they speak that or not). Polygamy just breeds a multitude of issues for women - insecurity, jealousy, resentment...and benefits only men. They all stop short of admitting the cause of these relationship issues between them is polygamy. I want to see them break free and get mad at the religion and specifically the men, that devalued their worth, relegating them to being a quarter of a woman not worthy of fidelity and their sole commitment .

I think she mainly used them, as she was humiliated and tried to control the narrative and do damage control, by bringing in all the other women and their stories to convince/remind everyone (including herself), she’s the victim and absolve herself of all responsibility for her emotional affair. Funny the plan backfired miserably, as they all admitted they were in love with ‘Sam’ and had the lusty relationship, something Meri never has owned up too; she glosses over that part entirely with the ‘I was a threatened victim’ angle. I bet Meri dropped those ‘close friends’ immediately after they did her bidding of attempting to convince Mariah/family and public, of her innocence. One episode after she’s trotted in yet another catfish victim, Kody put her on the spot on the couch and asks, ‘why exactly WERE you threatened Meri? What did they say? what did they do?’ Meri of course is ‘guarded’ and huffs, but has no answer, as she (and they) all know very well, she was happily enjoying her role in the relationship until she found out. He did that purely to call her on her BS (and I lapped it up 😆). She still brings up ‘the catfishing situation’ all the time to try and play the victim and detract from the fact she was basically caught cheating. The Browns should be eternally grateful for it too, as that storyline and her subsequent and continuous fallout from favor, has kept them on air and probably will for eternity.

Maddie, like her grifter parents before her, sees an opportunity to exploit her fan base with pyramid scheme after pyramid scheme. Her multiple accounts are pretty much just all her failed MLM “businesses” she’s discarded before moving on to the next scammy venture. I usually join her pages purely for the entertainment and this one is gold. These Plexus supplements she’s shilling, have not been tested or approved by the FDA and they do not disclose all of the ingredients in their various products. There’s multiple claims about improving “gut health” but zero actual scientific proof for how Plexus is supposed to improve gut health. Pseudo-science at best and fraud at worst. Of course like all MLM, it’s not about the product at all anyway, all Maddie will care about, is sucking her fans into her all important downline, to have them shill the snake oil to others, so she gets her riches. I despise this method of income full-stop, but particularly from those in a elevated position of ‘celebrity’ preying on those that worship them. Disgusting. Shame she couldn’t follow Logan/Aspyn (heck even Mariah), into an actual honest career, but she’s proven to be a sell-out dud, just like her parents before her.

This grifting cameo gig is a definite cringe-fest. Just when you think the Browns couldn’t get anymore desperate and tacky, they manage to lower themselves even further for a quick buck from their fans. 🙄 So true. Though she is prematurely ageing at an alarming rate, at least Christine is confident and secure enough with herself to not filter herself into oblivion. She’s infinitely more likeable and relatable than old Mare.

Thanks for that! Didn’t realise he was public 😊 Other wives don’t follow him, just Janelle. In order it’s Meri in the lead at 436k (probably because of all her pyramid scheme hashtag marketing), then Christine 401k, Janelle 398k, Maddie at 340k, Mykelti 175k, Robyn 166k, Mariah 130k, Kody 85k. Robyn and Kody aren’t active on social media so it’s expected they’d be way behind in followers, no one wants to follow dead space 😉 ETA -sorry I may have misread your question. I think the family mostly follow each other (with exceptions in my post above of a few not following each other) Christine and Janelle and Christine’s girls all appear to be followed by most family members though.

Did some sleuthing for you 😊 Most of the kids that have public social media like each other’s posts and occasionally comment. Most follow each other that I can see with the exception of those that aren’t actively using it or have private accounts - Logan, Michelle and Aspyn, Hunter, Gabe and Robyn’s kids are all private accounts so you can’t see who they follow. But noticeable family feuds - Mariah and Maddie no longer follow each other and neither do Maddie and Audrey! Mariah and Garrison don’t follow each other and neither do Audrey and Garrison. Hardly anyone (including Christine!) follows Tony, though her daughters do, as well as Janelle and Robyn. To rub salt in fat Tony’s wound, mostly everyone follows Mitch. Interestingly Mariah (& Audrey) seem the only children not followed by any of the other wives, only by Meri. If there was a least popular child award I think she wins it. Maddie and Meri don’t follow each other. Meri actually doesn’t follow any family members including other wives, with the exception of Mariah, Audrey, Gwendolyn and Ysabel, though all seem to follow her back (except Maddie).

Ugh, more filtered fakery. Get real old Mare.

You’re correct, according to social media she got the job a couple of months after returning (still says she presently works at Lululemon but I’m guessing she just forgot to end date that role when she added her new one and assumed it would automatically do it). . I’d imagine she loved lording it over all the ‘Lululemon Educators’ *coughretailsalespeople*cough, that she’d ‘trained in Bali’ and was a star influencer on Instagram (well in her own mind anyway). I’m sure her background in MLM and the AUB religion made it a natural transition to a job culture, of being told exactly how to think and behave. Definitely after gaining that job, she ramped up the Insta sales posts*, created her self-absorbed website and started fashioning herself as a ‘blogger/influencer’ - moves I’m positive were inspired by the Lulu/Landmark goal-setting koolaid, as it all ended abruptly after she went back to Utah and apparently commenced this other job. *side note - who remembers that glorious juice ad post, where she was spectacularly called-out by college friend, for never actually drinking the juice in college, as stated 😆.

Wow interesting. 😳 Lululemon Educator = glorified salesperson within a cult.

Bit of sleuthing and apologies if this was already discussed, but appears Mariah’s using all that expensive education for a role she only required a GED for? Unless she’s still studying at Loyola online and doing this as well. At least she has an honest job that’s not an MLM or a social media grifter now though, so I actually have much respect to her for that. Looks like her beginning this role coincides with her absence on social media and deleting her website and Twitter account last year and becoming a lot more private. Job description below for anyone interested ⬇️ https://southsaltlakecity.casellehire.com/jobs/98693.html

Love this. Science is amazing and YOU are amazing! So excited to see vaccines created and rolled out after only a year and the fact they are being administered by selfless and caring volunteers such as you - really heartwarming! Even more amazing, the fact that people are actually lining up to get vaccinated and not listening to misinformation from ignorant anti-vaxxers pushing their own agendas, which is a win for society ❤️ I hope Australia and NZ have such a good response to the vaccines when they are rolled out here also.

Aw thanks ladies! Missed you all too; excited to be back snarking now I have a bit of free time again and going back reading everything I missed 😘

Ohhh ohhh I have plenty! 🙋‍♀️ Kody starts his day off slicking his hair in a dodgy-car salesman ponytail, before dusting off his suit from the taco-twins wedding and rehearsing his impassioned ‘persecuted polygamist’ speech in Robyn’s bathroom. Necessary practice for season eleventeen, where he relocates the family back to Utah yet again, and attempts to run for office. He then artfully dodges any bothersome cries of “play with us dadddyy” from king Sol and little Areola, palming them quickly off to an older child, and begins to pen more signs in case they are needed for use in any further ‘persecuted plyg protests’, (back-up plan only if the running-for-office storyline fails but TLC needs more persecuted plyg content to keep them on air). He then soothes away tears from Robyn’s square chin while she sobs about how God needs to provide them with a swimming pool or bigger prairie poop pond, or something? meh who knows? Kody’s not really listening as it’s the 20th time she’s cried today and he is very busy in his head, working on further sophisticated paper presentations for convincing the wives on another move back to Utah. Because obviously without the theatrical dramatic presentation, it just wouldn’t happen. He finishes the busy day by ferrying a panicked attacked Aurora, hmm or is it Breanna? to her room. Meh, Kody doesn’t know which child it is. He is annoyed at having to do this today, as the cameras aren’t even here to witness it. He coaches Aurora/Breanna to break down only on camera next time and makes mental note to check how that child of Christine’s with the back problem is doing...Truabel? Gwenelki? Well whatever her name is, she better be ready to disclose intimate details of her condition and surgery for the moolah in the upcoming season. Kody finally takes a few well earned seats around Robyn’s mansion for the remaining precious 7 hours of daylight and racks his tiny brain, contemplating how unjust and persecuted his life has been because he’s a polygamist and thinks of illegal pyramid schemes that can help him earn grift lots of money. Take a rest Kody, you deserve it!

Hi my dear COLS! It’s been a minute since I’ve been here. Slowly catching up around the forums and what I’ve missed for the last half a year! I’ve been busy with a new business (real business - not like a Brown style pyramid scheme ‘business’ 😉) and that on top of my regular job, plus family life, just left things chaotic at that half of the year, but hoping now I’ve got more free time to pop on and snark, just in time for new season! 🤗 I will definitely try and be a bit more present here from now on. Crossing my fingers some kind Americans continue to load the new episodes on YouTube for those overseas to keep up, (as our season in Australia will air on TLC here at least 2 months behind America and you may all be snarked out by the time I watch them in on TV), but so looking forward to the hilarious recaps from our clever community here anyway. So glad to hear America is getting the vaccine rollout happening now, I’ve been watching the news with high cases and political unrest the past year, and thinking of you all. Here in Australia and New Zealand (where I am a citizen and spend a good deal of time) we’ve been lucky enough to have been spared the worst of Covid, with strict lockdowns and good contact tracing happening early, we have basically no community transmission now, just handfuls of cases from overseas flights which are detected in mandatory hotel quarantine (all travellers do this for 2 weeks anyway after arriving to protect the masses). Anyway looking forward to more snarking with you all soon x congrats @Kbo!

Hi @laurakaye I think you’re spot on! Can we even tell this isn’t his actual hair?😆 (photo credit @HighlandWarriorGrl great discovery! )

Wow the irony. 😂 If ever she needs to take her own advice on a subject, it’s with that one.

Interesting post by Paedon. Guessing he’s totally off Mariah’s Christmas card list as this seems to be a public FU aimed at her, given her recent rants that all police and military are bad (even though multiple brothers of hers are in the military). His post was liked by Maddie and Janelle. I’m thinking Mariah’s recent posts would have caused a lot of tension in the family and that’s why she’s gone missing from social media.