Aquarius

And calm. Which I can't imagine with just a stage separating her from that orange idiotic sack of shit.

My husband swears he just saw a nose-pick.

I know!? "Wait a minute!" Seriously?

And his son likens them to Skittles.

Bags of money bigger than the stage. STFU, you idiot!

To wit, no one who's sane.

Oooh - three "WRONG!"s in a row.

And for sure Kellyanne Conway will be grinning like the Crypt Keeper and doing the same. "He KILLED it! I'm so proud!"

I read this to my husband and he added, "With a baseball bat."

He'll keep us in suspense. Yes, that's the temperament of a President.

Yes, a single Senator, or a first lady. One snap of the fingers and done.

"They took money and bought a six-foot portrait of Donald. Who DOES that??" Awesome.

Don't go by that chick. She also pronounces "steak" with two syllables. "It actually hurt to eat. Corn. Stay-ayk." Ugh. Can't stand her, especially when she says her husband loves her "smi-ell." Yeah, big whoop. I bet most husbands love their wives' smiles.

Not once you get all your patients using My Shiny Hiney. Then it's lemon verbena, passion fruit and citrus ginger all day long. Every time I see that embedded video, I think of think of the poster above who said he/she thought the doctor was the lady's boss. Between the executive desk and the suit, it really does look like that! The idea makes me laugh each time.

Eh, toward the end Alton became a caricature of himself to the point that he was just the grumpy old man in the room. I remember Giada and Bobby acting like ridiculous children in front of him, with him just rolling his eyes and saying something that Gramps might say when the kiddos misbehave. I don't think any of this crap would stop with Alton around, it would just be punctuated with occasional shouts of "Get off my lawn!" I think Alton may have had too many years of bowties. I agree, though, the Terrible Twosome do need someone around to reel them in. I think Tyler might work. I don't know, I can just picture him saying, "You didn't just say 'Your man fine', did you?"

Seriously. That doesn't seem like such a happy home for her.

That was awesome! Too bad Damiano forgot to tell the poor soul how to say frog legs in Italian. It was pretty weird how Tregaye's husband and Damiano's brother seemed to be confused by these people in front of them. Jernard has associated himself so much with baby-making in my mind that I really didn't want to see what would happen when his wife showed up . . . I must have tuned it out because I don't remember how his wife reacted to him. And yes,Giada did lapse into some Ebonics there. New lows being set each episode this season, it seems. And what was Giada's helpful advice for when you have someone on stage with you that really doesn't want to be there? Why would anyone, ever be on stage when they didn't want to be there? Is Food Network forcing people's family and friends to appear on TV? That was just weird.

Really?? How did I miss that? I HATE Damiano's Vanilla Ice 'do.

Could it have brought on Brexit?

To be fair, most Irish (-Americans, at least) are dismissive about Irish food. St. Patrick's Day as a "food holiday"? Not in my Irish heritage. It's about parades and alcohol, punctuated by bagpipes. The "food holidays" were sort of ridiculous. St. Patrick's Day? Cinco de Mayo? (OK, not my heritage, but from what I've experienced around here there's as much a bar component as a restaurant one). Mardis Gras, again, an alcohol-fueled parade celebration. And while I understand there is a food component to all of these holidays, it's certainly not universa, and I don't think anyone sits down to a holiday dinner for any of these holidays. New's Year's Eve? Again, not sitting down for a dinner, but there's the whole appetizer aspect. Still, a holiday more associated with booze and revelry than food. Absolutely. I think she even pronounced it "Pad?? Thigh??" Which, come on, it's United States 2016. I think we've all been introduced to "Thai", whether we like it or not. My problem with Joy is that she seemed to put on the whole "we don't like" thing. I think she knew perfectly well what pad Thai was. And certainly how it was pronounced. I am sorry to say (or maybe not) that I missed most of Jernard's second-half presentation. Because I kept shrieking at my husband, "What the F*$K is Giada wearing?? What is she wearing??" Seriously, that dress must have come with a cat-o-nine-tails attached. If it was a dress and not a corset. We never did see, did we? Yikes, woman! Keep it in the bedroom where it belongs.

Not! Antonio Banderas words it better before he doesn't whip out his dick. "Only three ingredients and all of them natural." Definitely more of what they were going for. Can't speak for anyone else, but it seemed to me a little like this - https://video.search.yahoo.com/yhs/search?fr=yhs-mozilla-001&hsimp=yhs-001&hspart=mozilla&p=snl+dick+in+a+box#id=6&vid=edd45bff84aa92a795a08fed38fc05d0&action=click

Oh, yes, the "stupid husband" is really for anything non-mechanical, and usually household (read: cleaning or child-care) related. Anything involving a tool, machines, or advanced thinking - and you've got "So easy anybody can do it!" Usually punctuated by a woman's hand unwinding the telescoping wand or whatnot.

Only with the baby-making.

And probably be divorced within the year to boot. To be fair, in those ads the humanoid starts to suck ice cream out of its nostril or something equally disgusting. Not in defense, because I hate those ads too, but something that just occurred to me. When my father drove a Buick, for whatever reason they DID refer to it as "the Buick" - to the point that their Labrador retriever would go crazy at the word "Buick" because he thought they were going for a ride. Weird. . . maybe calling it "the Buick" is a thing once you buy one.

It's not the denim. It's the butt muscles or something. My husband butt dialed my work number from the SuperCuts where he gets his hair cut. :Left a 2-minute voicemail message, which was as exciting as the old "Was the box corrugated?" commercial from Verizon. I had no idea how to fast-forward the message and the system wouldn't let me delete it until I listened to whole . . . two . . . minutes. I never believed in the phenomenon of butt-dialing until that message.