SuburbanHangSuite

Wow. I just turned to MNF and was completely taken aback hearing a woman call the game. I thought it was Linda Cohn but just looked it up and it's Beth Mowins. Either way, I'm impressed. She sounds quite at ease too. Nice!

Aparna's real name is Jasmine Kaur? Now Chad calling her "Jasmine" is even funnier. Next season, they need to add more Chad and Kelli. They are too good to be seen in such small doses.

I was getting ready to say that Sloane just did but if I look at her again, it's more of an orangey hue. Oh well. What a random piece of trivia for them to report.

Z, if you aren't a writer, you damn sure need to consider a career change. This shit is award-worthy. You too, Mozelle. I.AM.DEAD.

So I saw it all through the Washington-Philly game yesterday and it quickly shot to the top of my favs: Sticks of butter for hands! Perfection. I understand Dez Bryant has a rebuttal ad coming. I like that these guys are getting paid from their real world beef.

Because if nothing else, this show is real as f*ck and that shit happens everyday in real life. Chad was killing it this week. First with the "Jasmine." Then observing that women don't need male friends. " Just a spare dick around for no reason!" I'm so done with Molly. Issa and Lawrence broke my heart. But I agree with y'all--maturity like that never happens in real life. Due North needs to be HBOs new show instead of that bullshit Confederate.

And I appreciated Zac's verbal smackdown of his absurd outfit--explaing how if he's presenting a garment, he shouldn't have anything distracting from the presentation. Those sheer shorts were beyond distracting and seemed to be just for shock value.

I already heart Zac but I live for his close-up exams of the designs. He cuts no slack. The designer carefully pins, tucks and camoflagues whatever errors they've made and Posen exposes them in no time flat. Aarons? "No design here whatsoever---just a flap of fabric!" as he pulls the long tail of tucked fabric. The poor model had to be mortified. But Zac gives great kudos where they're due too. Love how he appreciated the scalloping on Kentaro's. Such a small detail that took skill and precision to execute. I like that his professional eye picks up on those small things.

Thank you, Rilla-my-Rilla for explaining that without giving anything away. My two favorites. I've re-read them both multiple times and didnt care for either TV adaptation. But i think ill give this version of It a whirl. If you found Pennywise to be "unsettling" then it's probably a good portrayal.

Oh my goodness, I was so worried tor Kenya. She was just so flustered with this challenge from start to finish and her fighting back tears just about broke my heart. Similarly with Deyonte wiping his tears and saying his Grandnma told him, "Boy, you'd better not cry!" It's ok, Deyonte. Go home and enjoy fatherhood. And Kenya's model is gorgeous. The twins helping each other is so much bullshit. It almost seems as if they're deliberately daring the other designers to say something about the tag-teaming. Instructor's (Amy?) garment looked like a floor length model of the cape I wear at the hair salon. I agree that Samantha should've been a top design. Kentaro is love.

I noticed that Lu managed to drop in a plug for her bedding line. No shit, I saw some "Countess Luann" sheets in Ross just last week. Queen size set was 19.99. Somehow I don't think Ross is the demographic she was aiming for. Andy kept revisiting the Missy questions and I feel like that's a really sensitive topic with Lu. I think she knows Tom was probably hugged up with Missy before the ink was dry on the divorce filing (ok, who am I kidding - - - he was probably hugged up with her throughout their whole relationship!) and it's hard for her to stay on script when Andy keeps picking that scab. But good for her for facing the music.

The only thing that will console me right now (besides this glass of wine) is if Keys continues to wipe the court with Coco. 6-0 6-0 will suit me just fine.

I don't think it is her first night match. I know a lot of players have day gear vs night gear (just thinking of Sharapova with her evening lace and rhinstones---straight from the court to cocktails!) but I thought Venus was keeping the pink regardless of the time. No matter, I guess. She's way too cool to be beholden to superstitions and her play straightened out tremendously.

Thank goodness!! Those unforced errors were coming fast and furious.

Ok, I'm ridiculously superstitious and I need to know why Venus changed her dress from the pink she's worn ALL TOURNAMENT to this black / pink combo??? She needs to take a restroom timeout and go change. Quickly.

I was so disappointed in his loss that I didn't stick around for the post match chats--but that is an odd statement. He's usually so gracious and very careful not to offend an opponent but that statement makes it sound like he thinks his previous opponents were trash. I want to believe he didn't mean it that way. I gotta pull for DelPo now. I've never been a Rafa fan.

Girl, bye. I think my eyes might be permanently stuck in a rolled position after that mess.

Chocolate, vanilla, marble, lemon, buttercream, red velvet - - - pretty much anything that doesn't involve a random vegetable. LOL

YAAAAASSSSSSSS!!! That was fantastic. So many break chances on which she couldn't capitalize and she still managed to dig deep when it counted. Amazing focus and grit. Great job by Petra too. It's really a shame someone had to lose.

Real talk? I had a problem with Aparna all through this ep. Inviting herself to the birthday was bad enough but then coming outside (being Hella Nosey!) was just too much. She knew he left out to speak with his ex---what part of that conversation did she think she should be a part of? Not feeling her as a love interest for Lawrence, AT ALL. Bish needs to stay in her Programming Lane.

Right? A Popeye 's yielding to a Pinkberry is just a sad illustration of gentrification. A yoga studio is not far behind... Kelli made this whole episode. "Oh no this nigga di'int.." "BUTTER NIGGA!!!" And after Ahmal took that bite of buttered bread, "Ima dance when you die." Perfection. And if she didn't have me with the denim crack, she sure had me her views on carrot cake. I get downright stabby if someone is offering me some carrot cake as a dessert. And that one looked like it was full of nuts and twigs--as if the carrot wasn't bad enough.

Can I just tell y'all that I LIVE for those moments when Venus does her signature twirl. What a third set - - what a champion.

Then for her encore, she threw her Mixed Doubles partner under the bus in her on-court interview! I know she'll probably try to say that she was "joking" but that humorless bitch wasn't joking---she believes she carried him in their last match. If she ever plays Sharapova, I guess I'll just have to root for the court to open up and swallow them both whole.

Was Kenya the one who said her girl was dressing to go to a dance show? LOL. I think she realized that hers didn't really read "dance" and adjusted her story accordingly. But then, a few designers got dinged for being too literal. So best just to make what you want, make it fabulous and try to tie it to the challenge directions afterward. You said it all. I wondered why he kept gravitating to those ornate, pricey, LOUD fabrics at Mood and then he settled on that?? Or as Kentaro observed: " I like to eat pistachio, I wouldn't want to wear it."

I still cant keep everyone straight so I don't know his name but I was completely bothered by the model dropping the Mexican designer's kimono jacket on the floor. WTF? Someone needs a runway lesson for removing jackets from Ms. Jay, stat. Kenya's was fabulous. I would've put her in the top and made Batani safe. The butterfly dress was cute but i was underwhelmed--I think the fabric did all of the work. Those twins running frantically throughout the workroom worked my last nerve and i only saw about 30 seconds of that shit---can't imagine having to coexist with that. Doesn't Brandon's zen make them feel ridiculous? And speaking of Brandon... LOVED his! I'm really interested in seeing more from him. And his nervous humility? Adorbs. If the midriff was slightly more covered, I would totally rock Margarita's. I like that she's repping her Puerto Rican roots and loved her styling. I want to wear her ensemble on a weekend getaway to Havana and sip mojitos in all my fabulousness.