TVbitch

Carly: "Um, er, uh, I can't leave Port Charles, Jax, cuz... uh... cuz Michael is too nice! Yeah, that's it!" Jesus God, you dodged a bullet, Jax. I will miss you though. Dammit! I can never have nice things. Hate. Hate. Hate the new Q. Hate. Please take your blue eyes and broken baby voice and fuck right off. But not with Tracey's painting. I hope she's actually a sassy con woman sent by Luke to pull one last heist on Tracey, but then Tracey "Hulk smashes" them all and rides off into the sunset with her painting ...and Finn!

Ah, can we keep Jax and send Sonny to Australia? Pretty please! Why oh why couldn't they have paired Finn with Tracey. The chemistry is off the charts. But, you know, God forbid, cuz like they just did Olivia and Johnny, like 10 years ago.

Enjoyed this much more than the US version. (Except William's LOOK AT ME antics can get on the nerves.) Loved Gavin's super understated approach. I guess he's not coming back next time, wonder if that was by choice. I do miss Boy George, apparently he will be a judge on the Austrailian Voice so I will catch him on that. I did agree with the winner here. I think pretty much everyone did, and I enjoyed what seemed to be a lot of genuine comradery among the coaches and contestants.

So this week Wendy disclosed that she apparently tried like hell but could not get a trademark for "How you doin'?" ... ... Shocking! And sorry Wendy, but despite your fervent insistance that they are totally different, Joey from Friends' "How you doin'?" is pretty much the exact same as yours. And then today, when she was talking about Prince, she stated that if you find your friend dead of unkown circumstances, it is your responsibility to clean all the drugs out of the house before you call the cops. (Which I believe might also be called, "illegally tampering with a possible crime scene.") Jesus God.

I just remembered the one exchange I did really enjoy from this episode, when Hannah was going over her list of poor me woes yet again and her mother screamed in exasperation, something like: "Oh boo hoo, you know who else is in pain? Fucking everybody!!" I have several girlfriends I would love to say that too!

Can't think of anything positive to say about the finale, except that at least the police officer did not tell Hannah he wanted to help raise her baby. I guess I will just look forward to the show "Boys" staring Grover and his quirky friends, cuz Grover is going to come out of this way more fucked up than Hannah ever was.

Maybe it's the bottle of wine I had with lunch talking (don't judge it's been a long week), but I don't want Valentin to turn out to be evil. I like the way he interacts with Charlotte and his patience with Lulu. And his sad shy hunchback luv for Anna. And maybe he and Nick pre-planned Nick's death. And ...oh, okay well I guess he did clearly shoot Kevin and try to kidnap Spencer. But, I mean, hey, we've all done things.

Okay she did not say it like that, but it is totally what she meant when she told her not to wait too long to find a man. She constantly talks about women needing to get out there and date while they are "still juicy." And dear Lord, Wendy was ON Dancing with the Stars and she has historically (although not this season) had a physical leader board that she brought out every week to discuss who got voted off and who would win every season, yet she can't remember Cheryl Burke's name?

Mama June is probably also wrapped up like a mummy in those skin tight bandages doctors make you wear after skin removal and plastic surgery. I loved how at the end of the interview Wendy basically told her she did an adequate job og supplying the seedy info Wendy wanted. And when June said she wasn't thinking about men right now, Wendy told her not to wait too long or she'd be all dried up and alone. Good Lord, let the woman heal and get her shit together.

This is gonna be a tough season, pretty much everyone is growing on me, and they are all making great effort. Sasha is just an amazing gentleman. I want him to win ...but with Nancy.

Read this on the EW website... Also, did anyone else see the Jimmy Kimmel sketch of The Golden Girls with the four actresses as old women. Very entertaining. It's on youtube.

RIP Quinn. I guess at least you avoided the ultimate torture which is being in a relationship with Carrie. It seemed to hit Max harder than anyone else. I didn't realize they were so close. (?) Why is it a better idea for Carrie to take the PE out of an elevator stuck between floors and try to make a run for the parking garage?! Two Presidential vehicles were already blown up and the other guy told them the PE was alive, so she had to know secret service and other forces would be coming into the building to secure the PE. Those two snipers were not going to figure out her location and rappel down the elevator shaft before then.

So... Jessa was dragged out from under the bus to make room for Sosh?

I have totally seen the all-weather sports viewing pod before. Can't remember if it was the same guy/company, but I do remember there was also a pod big enough for two. The social aspect did come up, I believe. It might have been on Dragon's Den several years ago and I don't think they got a deal.

I have to say this episode would have felt much more realistic if only Fran and Patrick Wilson had shown up to tell Hannah that they really want to be a father to her baby. I mean, seriously, just 3 men?! Most single pregnant damsels have at least 5 princes lining up to rescue them! --TOTAL EYEROLL!

Carrie just enters the safehouse without informing anyone where she is at. Cuz no way would any bad guys still be watching it when the freaking van is in there. Then she jumps into the stolen van without gloves on and starts touching everything. Then doesn't clear the house and needs Quinn to rescue her. Then after talking to Quinn and realizing there might be a threat to the PE, she allows herself to be PUT ON HOLD instead of just blurting it out to the PE's aide who apparently has a problem with his cell service. Darn those Presidential dead spots. Can you hear me know? Both Carrie and Quinn looked pretty good for being that close to a huge blast. At least they didn't kiss when he walked out of the safehouse. I wonder if Max and Dar will have a beer and watch the game after becoming pals now. I guess Dar doesn't know any other computer geeks. Maybe he could have called The Geek Squad. His brainstorming session with Max was master spywork: "So Max, it looks like Peter is posting web rants and changed his Facebook status to "It's Complicated", does that sound right to you?" OMG Dar, I think you know Peter don't have no fucking web presence! (okay I'll stop!)

I really hope we haven't started a parade of happy endings, reunions, redemptions and closures. I thought Girls was messier than that. I could watch Friends or any Disney princess movie for that kind of bullshit.

Are they putting the cue cards in a new spot, cuz today I noticed EVERYBODY reading them. Even JE. Usually I only notice Maurice, cuz he gives zero fucks about the fact that he is reading cue cards and doesn't try to disguise it. I swear even the baby was looking at them today. As an addict, Finn's detox is beyond laughable. Um, if he was able to get into the shower and then switch into a comfy robe, then he probably could have gotten undressed BEFORE the shower, but I guess that wouldn't have been as dramatic or moist or something. I would think as a doctor, he would be aware that something called medical detox exists which could make it much easier on him, but duct taping himself to a chair is good too. EYEROLL Last week Sonny offered his Problem Disappearing Services to Dante, this week he offers them to the infant Scout as Jason & Sam look on affectionately. So sweet.

I just can't find anything very exciting about a season where the players know each other so well AND have so many outside relationships AND are so comfortable with Jeff that they casually get up and start having all kinds of conversations about the vote, like they are at a freaking cocktail party or something. In the opening episode when they walked down very well made pathways to their perfect beach sites, I had a feeling this season was going to be too much Club Med and too little Survivor.

Adam spent forever following Jessa around like a lovesick puppy to the point of stalking her to AA meetings. So now that he's won her over and they appear to be living together, it's a great time to start stalking Hannah and making inappropriate protestations that she is not over him. Dude, fucking sort yourself out! Go on walkabout or find your spirit animal or something.

I am watching the first season thanks to you guys reviews. This show looks like it is modeled after a UK show called "999 What's Your Emergency." Which follows medical, fire and police from initial emergency call to final result. They even interview the people that were arrested or taken to hospital or that got injured afterwards. And it's nice to have the call center interactions too. There is a lot of humor, and the medical and police are such good blokes dealing with all the homeless and mentally ill (and drunk people). I've cried on several episodes at their kind empathy. Plus in the UK - no gross gun shot wounds! I really prefer the UK series, and it's definitely worth a watch if you liked the first season of this show.

Uh, wow, shortest custody hearing ever. The judge literally deliberated for like 30 seconds. Also shortest person-stuck-to-a-bomb scare. And for that matter, shortest crazy-murderer-is-on-the-loose plot. Good thing Sam got the hell out the way at the bottom of that bridge or she would have been pummeled with more bodies. This was a weird week of GH. It's like they were trying to hurry up and resolve every single ongoing plotline RIGHT NOW after torturing us with the set ups for months and months. And months. Same like they did with the Nell thing.

PS. If Carrie gets Max (who I guess is ALSO in love with her, cuz, I mean, what man isn't) killed, I will cut a bitch!!

That's the only reason any of this is dismaying to me. I mean, I watch General Hospital for fucks sake, so I can take a soap opera. But this show was suppose to be more about feminism and written by a feminist, so if it ends up with Hannah needing to get pregnant to grow up and get it together and then getting back together with her "prince" ...da fuck?!

I really hope more counseling is involved than the single session we are shown that is often late in the game. If someone has been using food as a coping mechanism for decades, especially if they are self-medicating a history of abuse or trauma, then telling them to eat a 1200 calorie diet is essentially ripping their coping mechanism away from them and they are going to need help with that. One thing I learned being around trauma survivors is that it's just not fair to judge another person's resilliency. Some people seem to bounce out of the most horrific situations and go on to happy, productive lives, and some, no matter how hard they try, are just too damaged and broken. People are different and respond to things differently. Just in my own family, the difference between the way my siblings came out is remarkable.