S02.E08: Teenage Angst and Broken Hearts

[possibilities]

While Jazz goes on her first real date with a boy, the family wonders whether it could grow into something more serious; the harassing caller is identified, but Greg and Jeanette disagree on what action to take.

[CarolMK]

The date to the Butterfly place was nice though I'm sure it was arranged by the producers- most teens go out to eat or to the movies on dates and a lot of them that age don't date alone as a couple, they're usually in groups. Anyway, again, it seemed like her mom was getting too involved, wanting Jazz to get into a relationship with this boy because they all already know him and he's nice, accepts her, etc. Jazz doesn't yet seem too sure about what she wants from this and her dad is on board with this. 

I'm sure there will be another season but I hope Jazz doesn't get a lot of negative feedback from the kids at school about her show.

[Pepper Mostly]

Geez, Jeanette, where's the fire? Jazz is 15! Those poor kids, having to go out followed by a crew. I just hope they had a date on their own. Gah. Dating is awkward enough.

Guess we're all pretty much over Jazz and Family, huh? LOL

[honeydo7]

Maybe we could convince TLC to give the grandparents their own show?  

[Pepper Mostly]

LOL! Perfect!

[possibilities]

I want to see the grandparents do an episode of The People's Couch. Or they could live tweet something with Leslie Jones.

[fuzzylollipop]

Judging by the crickets in these message boards, I'm going to be extremely surprised if this show comes back for another season. Especially with the twins going on to college, not that the show focuses on them, but it's going to drastically change the family dynamic. 

A few notes on this episode:

1. It has been said already, but I still can't get over the mom being so pushy with Jazz and the relationship. Encouraging her to kiss on the first date? Encouraging pursuing a relationship because he's there and accepts Jazz and there may not be another guy in high school who does? I didn't go on a single date in high school, but beware world when I got to college because I became a hardcore serial dater. Some of us are just late bloomers and there's nothing wrong with that! Reminds me of how pushy my mom was to get me out in the dating world at that age and it just makes me uncomfortable to watch. And then encouraging the twins to party in college because she was a party animal who woke up in a pizza box one day? I just feel like she's one of those moms who is trying to hard to be cool and relevant in her kids eyes. 

2. As a Miami native, I am so disappointed in this show for promoting Miami Seaquarium. They are notorious for their structure violations and animal abuse (see Free Lolita on YouTube). For a family so for human rights and equality, I would hope that this open mindedness and kindness would branch out to the animal world as well. I know supporting the lgbt community isn't expected to go hand in hand with fighting for animal rights, but I'm sure they can at least see some kind of correlation. 

3. Noelle took Jazz to my favorite donut shop! It's called Mojo Donuts and it is amazing and now I need a donut from there, but they're like an hour drive from me. To see that they support transgenders using the bathrooms of their choice makes them that much more awesome ✊?

[maraleia]

4 hours ago, fuzzylollipop said:

Judging by the crickets in these message boards, I'm going to be extremely surprised if this show comes back for another season. Especially with the twins going on to college, not that the show focuses on them, but it's going to drastically change the family dynamic. 

A few notes on this episode:

1. It has been said already, but I still can't get over the mom being so pushy with Jazz and the relationship. Encouraging her to kiss on the first date? Encouraging pursuing a relationship because he's there and accepts Jazz and there may not be another guy in high school who does? I didn't go on a single date in high school, but beware world when I got to college because I became a hardcore serial dater. Some of us are just late bloomers and there's nothing wrong with that! Reminds me of how pushy my mom was to get me out in the dating world at that age and it just makes me uncomfortable to watch. And then encouraging the twins to party in college because she was a party animal who woke up in a pizza box one day? I just feel like she's one of those moms who is trying to hard to be cool and relevant in her kids eyes. 

2. As a Miami native, I am so disappointed in this show for promoting Miami Seaquarium. They are notorious for their structure violations and animal abuse (see Free Lolita on YouTube). For a family so for human rights and equality, I would hope that this open mindedness and kindness would branch out to the animal world as well. I know supporting the lgbt community isn't expected to go hand in hand with fighting for animal rights, but I'm sure they can at least see some kind of correlation. 

3. Noelle took Jazz to my favorite donut shop! It's called Mojo Donuts and it is amazing and now I need a donut from there, but they're like an hour drive from me. To see that they support transgenders using the bathrooms of their choice makes them that much more awesome ✊?

Wow thanks for the info about Miami Seaquarium. Also, it's not transgenders with an s at the end. It's just transgender people/person.

[fuzzylollipop]

Just now, maraleia said:

Wow thanks for the info about Miami Seaquarium. Also, it's not transgenders with an s at the end. It's just transgender people/person.

Thanks! I had no idea, how embarrassing. Love teaching and being taught ;)

[maraleia]

10 minutes ago, fuzzylollipop said:

Thanks! I had no idea, how embarrassing. Love teaching and being taught ;)

No worries. I'm just here to help educate allies on all the new terminology.

As for the show. I think they need to say no to another season because I don't want this show to ruin their family dynamic. Maybe a few specials a year but not a regular show.

[fuzzylollipop]

Maraleia, yes so much yes to your post! The terminology is constantly changing and I feel like it really has evolved in the last couple of years now that the world is slowly becoming more accepting (off topic, but I visited Pulse last weekend and it broke my heart). I'm going to have to do some reading to brush up because I hate to admit that it wasn't until I read it on these forums that I found out what cis meant or pansexual... Or not to add an s to transgender. I'm sure there's still a lot more to learn so shows like this do serve a purpose in educating some time. 

But I am getting way to off topic, I agree on the family dynamic changing. Honestly, I want Jazz to step back from the limelight and concentrate on high school because that's hard enough without it playing out on tv. Come back and give us a special on her high school graduation and I'm happy. She's such a sweet, mature and intelligent girl and I don't want her tarnished by reality tv. 

[Madding crowd]

Jazz didn't seem to enjoy the date, and the last few episodes she seemed kind of flat. I think her mother is pushing her into situations she just doesn't want. That being said, I don't know what she really likes to do since it seems that her mother is always picking things out for her. I hope her emotions are just typical teen stuff and she is not feeling depressed. Alex seemed like a nice guy, but not everyone wants a relationship at 15. It seems a bit odd to me that we don't see Jeanette lining up dates for her 18 year old sons, but she keeps talking to Jazz about dating and having sex. 

[greekmom]

11 hours ago, Madding crowd said:

Jazz didn't seem to enjoy the date, and the last few episodes she seemed kind of flat. I think her mother is pushing her into situations she just doesn't want. That being said, I don't know what she really likes to do since it seems that her mother is always picking things out for her. I hope her emotions are just typical teen stuff and she is not feeling depressed. Alex seemed like a nice guy, but not everyone wants a relationship at 15. It seems a bit odd to me that we don't see Jeanette lining up dates for her 18 year old sons, but she keeps talking to Jazz about dating and having sex. 

I think it's because the show is called I am Jazz. Not I am Sander or I am Griffin.  With respect to Jeanette - yeah she's pushy but most of the time in my opinion it's because she is treading unfamiliar waters and sometimes when parents see some indication of a "handicap" (whether intentional or subconsciously) it makes them push their kids even more (I had a cousin who's mom considered her an ugly duckling was pushing her at 15 to find a husband a la my big fat gypsy style).   Jeanette really should just back off and let the girl be and find her own way.

Also the point of the whole show from what I've seen is that Jazz has enough money for top and/or bottom surgery eventually. It will be costly no matter how well off the Jennings are.  I agree that the show is probably running out of storylines (hence the dating episode) and really should go to update specials instead of an annual tv show. 

Edited August 3, 2016 by greekmom
just to clarify who she is

[Madding crowd]

Yes, the show is called I Am Jazz, but they show a lot if the boys as well. We saw Jeanette having mom time with them, working out for the mud run thing, playing golf etc. I just didn't see any particular interest in the 18 year olds dating, so why push Jazz? I think Jeanette knows what type of storylines are interesting to viewers and that sometimes overrides what is best for Jazz.

[Muffyn]

There would be more of a story if a comparison was made.  When did Ari first start dating?  When did the boys first start dating?  With that information we would know if an expectation to have Jazz date at 15 is fitting with her siblings' experience.   Jazz didn't seem particularly engaged during the date.  Could be that she liked him more on text than in person, could be just the awkwardness of a first date, or it could be he came on a bit strong.  Regardless, having cameras there certainly affected their date.

It's time to give this show a break.  They don't have enough material to fill out the episodes.  Jazz deserves to be able to  live her life and grow up out of the spotlight for awhile. 

[gingerella]

I never post here but wanted to say that this last epi creeped me out. This whole alleged date felt like a set up. First of all, this kid calls her out of the blue, she has not kept in touch with him in years and suddenly he's lavishing all this praise on her. It wasn't so much flirting as it was auditioning for the role of Jazz's boyfriend. I found it to be bizarre. She has clearly said she doesn't know what her sexual orientation ispreferences are yet, and this kid is pushing a 'relationship' on her saying things like "I want you to experience love, I want to be the one you experience that with..." I find that very suspect given that they did not keep in touch for years. Now she's on TV and he pops up and wants to be basically 'her first'?  I'm not even sure what his sexual orientation preference is? Is Jazz a convenient experiment for him? What are his intentions? Why is it the only people questioning any of this as being slightly suspect are the grandparents?  And why doesn't the mother ever listen to what Jazz's father thinks?

I was also baffled at their comments that she couldn't 'have sex' anyway, even if she wanted to. What does that even mean? She has a penis, yes?  She's told us she can get a boner (her words post surgery), so why cant she have sex yet? There are lots of ways to 'have sex', I'm sure there is something she could explore if she was interested in doing so. I just found that comment odd.  I am rooting for Jazz, but there are so many odd comments, most of them leading back to her mother.

Overall, I'm glad this show was on because I learned so much about what it's like to be a transgender female teen, but I don't need to see more if it's going to be at the expense of Jazz's mental health or her safety. On one side, I can see how much it might help other trans teens to see her journey and know they are not alone, but on the other hand, she is clearly experiencing deep depression if she's thought about suicide, so why continue showing this on a TV show? I really feel for this young lady and wish her well. Updates, fine. But I'm with those who say enough, let her grow up out of the spotlight already.

Edited August 4, 2016 by gingerella

[maraleia]

3 minutes ago, gingerella said:

I never post here but wanted to say that this last epi creeped me out. This whole alleged date felt like a set up. First of all, this kid calls her out of the blue, she has not kept in touch with him in years and suddenly he's lavishing all this praise on her. It wasn't so much flirting as it was auditioning for the role of Jazz's boyfriend. I found it to be bizarre. She has clearly said she doesn't know what her sexual preferences are yet, and this kid is pushing a 'relationship' on her saying things like "I want you to experience love, I want to be the one you experience that with..." I find that very suspect given that they did not keep in touch for years. Now she's on TV and he pops up and wants to be basically 'her first'?  I'm not even sure what his sexual preference is? Is Jazz a convenient experiment for him? What are his intentions? Why is it the only people questioning any of this as being slightly suspect are the grandparents?  And why doesn't the mother ever listen to what Jazz's father thinks?

I was also baffled at their comments that she couldn't 'have sex' anyway, even if she wanted to. What does that even mean? She has a penis, yes?  She's told us she can get a boner (her words post surgery), so why cant she have sex yet? There are lots of ways to 'have sex', I'm sure there is something she could explore if she was interested in doing so. I just found that comment odd.  I am rooting for Jazz, but there are so many odd comments, most of them leading back to her mother.

Overall, I'm glad this show was on because I learned so much about what it's like to be a transgender female teen, but I don't need to see more if it's going to be at the expense of Jazz's mental health or her safety. On one side, I can see how much it might help other trans teens to see her journey and know they are not alone, but on the other hand, she is clearly experiencing deep depression if she's thought about suicide, so why continue showing this on a TV show? I really feel for this young lady and wish her well. Updates, fine. But I'm with those who say enough, let her grow up out of the spotlight already.

FYI it's not sexual preference it's sexual orientation. We don't choose who we are attracted to.

[bref]

Question to anyone who watched, what was the story with the harassing caller being identified? Who was it and did the parents take action? Thanks in advance.

[Sew Sumi]

They didn't ID the caller by name, but they said that the cops knew who he was. There was nothing more to be done, since the caller hadn't made good on any of the threats. Jeanette wasn't happy with this resolution, and I wish that attorney Greg could have spelled it out in a little more detail (the why, not the who), but that's all we got. 

Edited August 4, 2016 by Sew Sumi

[PupCal]

The fifteen-year old boy gushing and telling Jazz how much he wanted her to experience love was horrifying. What fifteen-year old boy talks like that?

And Jeanette constantly pushing her fifteen-year old daughter to date is also creepy.

[gingerella]

Was last week the finale?

n/m, I realize it was. Which makes the content of the episode even weirder. It's like they want us all on the hook waiting to hear if she continues dating this kid next season. I'm not waiting, I hope we don't see it, but I'm pretty sure there isn't going to be a second date.

Edited August 4, 2016 by gingerella

[Fostersmom]

Jazz seemed like she like the idea of flirting and chatting, but not so much the actual reality of the date. The boy was obviously way more into the idea of the date and future dates than she was. Granted, he's 14 and most 14 year old boys are all jittery on a good day, but can you image Jazz's future if they had a few more dates? Between him and her mom, there would be wedding planning talk after the 3rd date. 

[ClareWalks]

Jazz might physically be capable of having sex, but there is a maturity required that Jazz is probably aware enough to recognize. Also the fact that transgender people who haven't had bottom surgery may have very complicated feelings about their genitals that would make them hesitate to engage in sexual activity with others. Nothing wrong with that, she is so young. I find it creepier that adults are dwelling on it so much, including her own mom.

[Fostersmom]

If Jazz showed any interest in having sex at this point of her life, I'd be on mom's side, but Jazz barely seemed to want to hold hands and mom needs to be okay with that. My nephew has had the same girlfriend since he was 13, he's 21 now. She's a year younger and she was VERY sexually aggressive towards him. My mom described her as a cat in heat when she (girlfriend) was 13. By the time they were 14 and 15, my sister told the girl's dad, he was a single parent, he better get her on the pill. He balked, she's only 14! Yeah, and he's 15… how old were you when you first had sex? He went to high school with us, she was aware of his answer before he said it, he took her like the very next week. That's the kind of girl you dwell on. Jazz, at this point, not so much. Maybe when she meets someone she's really into, not just the first boy to pay her attention and one with a cute story of we were elementary school dating, that's the right time for the whole are you going to kiss him, have sex with him questions. 

[hokeypokeyFOIA]

My hot take on this episode (yes I'm just catching up with this show) is that even as a set of straight kids, having a 1st date mention "love" screams way, way too fast. And that's for kids who don't have that much of a complicated situation.  Much less being filmed. That would have scared 10th grade me off completely.

I love Jazz's friendship with Noelle. I wish Noelle will be able to find a place where she can show more joy. She comes across far too frequently as Eeyore, which makes me sad. Jazz is so much more animated. Noelle could even have her own show if she gained more confidence. She seems very intelligent and thoughtful, and has her own experience that is not at all the same as the one Jazz is going through. But even if she doesn't get her own show and merely becomes Jazz's recurring friend, I'm good with that. She is actually quite attractive, with lovely bone structure. 

Back to the boyfriend, I have a friend with a son who is bisexual but who basically wants to be in a romantic relationship with a female for his life, but also is open to sexual relationships with men. He just doesn't want to marry a man. I get that there is a spectrum. I wish they had addressed how Alex believes he identifies. I get that this is intrusive, but hey, you are already on a show that is nationally broadcasting your date with a trans female, so make use of your time. Don't go halfway.