S02.E06: Moving In

[Passthepopcorn]

I got other Ryan's reluctance to leaving home. His mother is elderly and has been through a lot. He is now leaving her to do most of the work in bringing up his niece. That would cause anyone with a heart to feel conflicted. Not everyone can/wants to leave their family as soon as they hit adulthood. I don't think he should be made fun of or judged because of that.

 

 

Absolutely. The world is a better place because of families that work together, instead of just me, me, me. I have a lot of respect for that.

[okerry]

Ryan D. and Sean are both acting like guys who are "just not that into you" -- as in, just not that into Jessica and Davina.

 

Having sex the first night probably has a lot to do with that for R&J, although it's not the only thing.

 

I have to wonder if S&D actually did the deed, too. I'm betting they tried and it didn't go well because Sean was probably a real pig about it and expected her to be just as fast and easy as the girls he normally hooks up with. Hence Davina could say that they didn't have sex, because technically it's true -- but not exactly. And everything went downhill from there.

 

Anyway, this is how men behave when they are stuck with women they really don't want. They will become complete jerks in the hopes that she'll end it and he won't have to. No amount of excusing their behaviour will help. They might be perfectly happy with some other woman that they really do fall for, but it's not going to happen with these two.

[Passthepopcorn]

A couple of things made me teary eyed in this episode:

1) Ryan R time to go. Because I can see how much they will miss him and because I can see how understanding they are nonetheless.

2) Seeing how easily things are flowing between Ja + RR. When you start missing him for no reason, when you enjoy doing things together, when you can have fun even in the mess of apartment hunting and moving (I so no stress), when you really listen to each other's needs. The true definition of falling in love, of new beginning, of hope. They seem like they make a good team.

[Wings]

I have to remind myself that this show IS an experiment and designed to entertain.  Everyone signed up for this knowing the details. 

 

No respectful psychologist would ever think it is a good idea to pair a woman who struggles to communicate her feelings  (Jessica) with someone who is not able to work with her on that.  Never happen.  Being with a man like RyanD won't teach her to do this.   Again I remind myself, the pool to choose from is very small.  AND they want conflict. 

 

We are only 3 episodes in.  They are showing us 14.6 minutes of each couple each week.  That is very little given how long the cameras are rolling.  Of course they will show the worst of everyone or the best depending on the story arc they have created.  Will we see redemption or destruction?

 

Since I think RyanD is on here because he wants to be on TV I will predict he is not going to shine in the end because he does not have his mind or heart in the format.  And maybe not bright enough formulate a plan that could serve him.   

 

As for Davina, I bet we will like her in the end and understand where she is coming from now.  

[shopper73]

Ryan D. and Sean are both acting like guys who are "just not that into you" -- as in, just not that into Jessica and Davina.

Having sex the first night probably has a lot to do with that for R&J, although it's not the only thing.

I have to wonder if S&D actually did the deed, too. I'm betting they tried and it didn't go well because Sean was probably a real pig about it and expected her to be just as fast and easy as the girls he normally hooks up with. Hence Davina could say that they didn't have sex, because technically it's true -- but not exactly. And everything went downhill from there.

Anyway, this is how men behave when they are stuck with women they really don't want. They will become complete jerks in the hopes that she'll end it and he won't have to. No amount of excusing their behaviour will help. They might be perfectly happy with some other woman that they really do fall for, but it's not going to happen with these two.

[Passthepopcorn]

Davina is married to her success, Manhattan and financial status. She'd rather live in a shoe box for a gazillion dollars than a big house with yard and healthier air. To each their own.

I feel for Sean, I don't think he'll make it. I think he is just realizing that moving to a radically different place IS a deal breaker for him. He seems to be loosing interest rapidly.

The final touch was the way she asked for more romance: "I need that s**t! Court me". Sure, you just got him in the mood, boss.

[shopper73]

I have said this same thing (though not as clearly or as well) in several previous posts. I think that about Jessica and Ryan, and also Davina and Sean. I also think Sean and Davina had sex already or almost did, and now the thrill is gone, or something was disappointing.

And, neither of these men are in pursuit of their matches, they are hoping they will go away!

[JapMo]

 

Last time Jessica spoke up Douche blew up and lost his shit. She knows that she has to pick her battles with this guy or else they will be fighting 24/7.

A closet isn't worth unleashing the beast. Unfortunately some relationships are like that, you vent in your corner and you don't discuss every single thing.

 

I bet if she did highlight his every douche act (there are many), he would probably see her as nagging.

 

Last time? Wasn't that the only time? One fight and now they're battling 24/7?

[Neurochick]

Last time Jessica spoke up Douche blew up and lost his shit. She knows that she has to pick her battles with this guy or else they will be fighting 24/7.

A closet isn't worth unleashing the beast. Unfortunately some relationships are like that, you vent in your corner and you don't discuss every single thing.

 

I bet if she did highlight his every douche act (there are many), he would probably see her as nagging.

 

I don't see this.  In fact I see the opposite.  I see someone who won't speak up for themselves, so they sit and pout and that just pisses some people off.  When she showed Ryan her Monroe piercing, he said it looked trashy and Jessica got upset.  He didn't say, "YOU look trashy, but IT looks trashy."  Now , maybe Ryan should have said, "you look better without it," but if Jessica is going to get upset every time someone gives their opinion, no man will be good enough for her, unless he tells her how wonderful she is.  Now, I think Ryan is immature, but to me so is Jessica.

[shopper73]

I would think that a man you just met, and in fact married and were sleeping with, would be calling you gorgeous and not making any negative comments, direct or indirect. He would be affectionate and generous in all ways. Ryan D did appear generous with money but he is a big spender in general. He just doesn't seem to be sho Jessica wants on so many levels. I don't know how they got matched. Their devotion to family? Very far fetched.

[moonxyz]

 

 

Last time? Wasn't that the only time? One fight and now they're battling 24/7?

 

Please re-read what I wrote. I said that if she spoke up everytime he said something douchey, they would be constantly fighting.

 

And the piercing fight was indeed the last and only time she spoke up. Since then, she has been walking on egg shells.

Edited April 23, 2015 by moonxyz

[Passthepopcorn]

Did Davina (who I think I am going to start referring to as "diva") tell Sean they should have sex?  did I miss that?  I kind of tune out when they are on because they are so exhausting to watch.  But I can't believe I missed Miss Pristine telling the horn dog that she wanted to have sex and he bailed on her.

I don't think so. Not at all. She wants him wanting her, she wants the attention. I don't know what it will take for her to give in, if ever...

[shopper73]

I don't think so. Not at all. She wants him wanting her, she wants the attention. I don't know what it will take for her to give in, if ever...

No, you heard right. Davina told him he wasn't her brother, and it had to happen soon. He responded that it isn't wham bam booty ma'am and left!

She now wants to have sex with him. He did say at the beginning of their conversation that anxiety is blocking his ability to be intimate, ED I guess.

Edited April 23, 2015 by shopper73

[ElectricCityy]

If Jessica called Ryan out for all his shit, they would've had about 5 arguments by now. She has been put in a position (by the "experts") where she has to bite her tongue a lot in 2 weeks. How the "experts" can justify that, I don't know.

[moonxyz]

If Jessica called Ryan out for all his shit, they would've had about 5 arguments by now. She has been put in a position (by the "experts") where she has to bite her tongue a lot in 2 weeks. How the "experts" can justify that, I don't know.

 

That's exactly my point. This situation forces her to be either a doormat or a nag. She can't win either way

And I don't understand why the experts though Ryan would be a match for anyone. 

Edited April 23, 2015 by moonxyz

[SaucyMommy]

Yep Jessica is in a lose/lose situation. I don't like how she handles conflict. But Ryan D is so abrasive and opinionated it would be like dating a toddler. You have to pick your battles.

[JapMo]

 

If Jessica called Ryan out for all his shit, they would've had about 5 arguments by now. She has been put in a position (by the "experts") where she has to bite her tongue a lot in 2 weeks. How the "experts" can justify that, I don't know.

 

If you're counting one of those 5 arguments as the closet incident, that was so insignificant I wouldn't even call it a difference of opinion. He said he'd like to take the whole closet and she made a choking/sarcastic laugh, and he asked why she was laughing and she just shrugged and then he said did she want some space too, and she wouldn't acknowledge him and it went on that way for maybe 15 seconds. I didn't think his demeanor or the way he sounded would warrant her to bite her tongue for fear of unleashing his anger.

[Neurochick]

Yep Jessica is in a lose/lose situation. I don't like how she handles conflict. But Ryan D is so abrasive and opinionated it would be like dating a toddler. You have to pick your battles.

 

The way to handle Ryan is the way an adult will handle a child, ignore him.  Let him go off and then say, "are you finished?" and keep it moving.   See, Ryan has learned that if he stomps his foot, people will give him what he wants, but if you don't, he'll just have to learn another way, or leave.  

Edited April 23, 2015 by Neurochick

[Passthepopcorn]

No, you heard right. Davina told him he wasn't her brother, and it had to happen soon. He responded that it isn't wham bam booty ma'am and left!

She now wants to have sex with him. He did say at the beginning of their conversation that anxiety is blocking his ability to be intimate, ED I guess.

They are getting so complicated!! Lol.

What happened to "wait until we are in love"? It is not going naturally...

[cerealboxkilla]

I don't think any of these couples are going to make it, not even Jacklyn/Ryan R. Jaclyn is trying her hardest to be attracted to Ryan, but that's not how relationships work. People fall into love; there really shouldn't be any kind of "forcing" involved. Last year's Jamie and Doug felt a lot more natural. When Ryan was all "Should we consummate the house?", she looked worried and apprehensive. It was a flash of, "Oh shit, it's happening." They won't last.

 

Sean/Davina is crashing sooner than I expected. It's even worse than Vaughn/Monet, and at least those two were still having sex between their shouting. What I want to know is when did the "switch" happen? Was he acting weird over Christmas? I think Davina talked him to death, either that or he realized this experience just wasn't for him.

 

I actually don't fault Ryan Douchebag for the closet fiasco. Jessica should have spoken up. I know she told the experts she wanted a "take charge" man, but I think this is another Monet situation. Jessica clearly doesn't know what she wants. She needs a big, dopey emotional cry baby like herself who is just as sensitive as she is. She's so fragile. Who fights back tears over a damn closet? And she was already putting her clothes in the bureau, so what did she expect? That both were hers for the taking? I know Jessica is a sweet person and she looks like a saint when paired with Ryan Douchebag, but I just don't like her that much. Emotional wet blankets like that are such joykills. But I'll hold my judgment on her for the next episode.

[JAndy]

I don't think any of these couples are going to make it, not even Jacklyn/Ryan R. Jaclyn is trying her hardest to be attracted to Ryan, but that's not how relationships work. People fall into love; there really shouldn't be any kind of "forcing" involved. Last year's Jamie and Doug felt a lot more natural. When Ryan was all "Should we consummate the house?", she looked worried and apprehensive. It was a flash of, "Oh shit, it's happening." They won't last.

Sean/Davina is crashing sooner than I expected. It's even worse than Vaughn/Monet, and at least those two were still having sex between their shouting. What I want to know is when did the "switch" happen? Was he acting weird over Christmas? I think Davina talked him to death, either that or he realized this experience just wasn't for him.

I actually don't fault Ryan Douchebag for the closet fiasco. Jessica should have spoken up. I know she told the experts she wanted a "take charge" man, but I think this is another Monet situation. Jessica clearly doesn't know what she wants. She needs a big, dopey emotional cry baby like herself who is just as sensitive as she is. She's so fragile. Who fights back tears over a damn closet? And she was already putting her clothes in the bureau, so what did she expect? That both were hers for the taking? I know Jessica is a sweet person and she looks like a saint when paired with Ryan Douchebag, but I just don't like her that much. Emotional wet blankets like that are such joykills. But I'll hold my judgment on her for the next episode.

I don't really see that from Jaclyn and Ryan. I do think that it's entirely possible to not find someone physically attractive from the get-go but then get attracted to them as you get to know them more. I didn't think she had an oh-shit face. She seems like the type of person who wouldn't just do something because she feels pressure to. But that's just how I see it.

I don't mine jessica. It's ok to be emotional and I find Ryan D to be such a jerk. He's awful. He just rolls over her and doesn't seem to be able to read her well.

[MsPH]

I think Jaclyn looked nervous because she hasn't had sex in two years, not because she isn't into Ryan. She looks like she's totally falling in love to me.

 

I'm still on Jess's side about the closet thing. He was all "You can have the dresser, you already took it anyway" after she'd put her clothes in one drawer. In what world does that qualify as taking over the whole dresser? He is just weird.

 

I also don't think Davina wanted to have sex. She just wanted some affection since Sean stopped being all over her, probably because it wasn't leading anywhere and he had other things to worry about, like a move. She interpreted it as him not being into her or the experiment, which is why she got all pouty and started scolding him again. She is just immature. If you want affection, then show some yourself. She always seems to jump to the worst conclusion and reads too much into things and it's pushing him away. 

[Snarklepuss]

I said that if she spoke up everytime he said something douchey, they would be constantly fighting.

 

And the piercing fight was indeed the last and only time she spoke up. Since then, she has been walking on egg shells.

 

Yeah, maybe if Jessica spoke up in her immature, passive aggressive, smirky way they would be constantly fighting, but I don't see that as the only way to handle him.  I wouldn't feel like I had to walk on egg shells with him.  Perhaps that's because I know if I were in her shoes I'd be able to handle him without fights.  She is too passive aggressive to be with him.  She would need to be more direct, and then I don't think he'd argue with her, he'd likely compromise.  He may have his faults and be somewhat immature, but I don't see him as that much of a dick.  I think he is more ruffled by her attitude with him than anything else.

Edited April 24, 2015 by Snarklepuss

[Snarklepuss]

Last time Jessica spoke up Douche blew up and lost his shit. She knows that she has to pick her battles with this guy or else they will be fighting 24/7.

A closet isn't worth unleashing the beast. Unfortunately some relationships are like that, you vent in your corner and you don't discuss every single thing.

 

I bet if she did highlight his every douche act (there are many), he would probably see her as nagging.

 

I don't think Jessica knows how to lobby for what she wants constructively with someone like Ryan.  She always victimizes herself and then withdraws sullenly, in a way designed to make the guy feel like he didn't give her what she deserved.  You can't do that early on in a relationship or it's doomed to fail.  Guys can be big douches when they are new in a relationship and need to be broken in right, but she is failing miserably at that.  I don't sense that he is trying to bulldoze her, he's just being clueless and sticking his foot in his mouth once in a while, but he seems to want to please her.  At one point in this episode he even said something like "I can't give her what she wants unless she tells me what she wants".  I think she expects him to be a mind reader.  A lot of guys, especially young guys under 35 will just do what they like and if the woman doesn't say something they assume she's OK with it.  But that doesn't make him anything but a typical douche.  He's not an abuser, he's not a bully and he's not all these other big bad things, but she is making him out to be.  Man, she needs to learn a thing or two about relationship psychology.  Then again, I am a few decades older than she is.  When I was young I was not quite so assertive myself and let guys railroad me that way.  But most of them didn't really want it all their way.  One guy I dated did, but he was a total Jerk.  He insisted on listening to HIS favorite radio station in the car, and no matter how I tried to encourage him to compromise with me on that, he wouldn't give in.  That was just the tip of the iceberg.  I am not sensing that kind of selfishness from Ryan.  I still think he would be more willing to compromise if she were more assertive.

 

BTW, I see the "trashy" incident as separate from anything else because she got offended by his comment.  That to me is in a different category from him just being clueless and making assumptions about how best to share or not share closet and drawer space.  He really stuck his foot in his mouth with that trashy comment and despite trying to explain himself she was not buying it.  There are ways to deal with a guy in a situation like that to find out if he really is sorry he hurt your feelings unknowingly, but she did not give him an opportunity to do that.  She dug in her heels and did not let up on him.  That's the first way to get a guy so mad at you that he storms out.  This is based on 40 years of experience with men.  She is young and not mature enough to know how to handle a guy so he won't do that.  Sure, he may have been a douche, but learn how to deal constructively with it and she might be surprised to find out the guy actually is sorry and does care that he hurt her even if it wasn't intentional.

Edited April 24, 2015 by Snarklepuss

[molshoop]

 

Guys can be big douches when they are new in a relationship and need to be broken in right, but she is failing miserably at that.

 

          From my 50 years of experience I've found that guys that are arseholes at the beginning of a relationship only

         get worse as time goes by.  If you want to train someone and teach them not to have tantrums, adopt a toddler.

[Pepper Mostly]

 

I actually don't fault Ryan Douchebag for the closet fiasco. Jessica should have spoken up. I know she told the experts she wanted a "take charge" man, but I think this is another Monet situation. Jessica clearly doesn't know what she wants. She needs a big, dopey emotional cry baby like herself who is just as sensitive as she is. She's so fragile. Who fights back tears over a damn closet? And she was already putting her clothes in the bureau, so what did she expect? That both were hers for the taking? I know Jessica is a sweet person and she looks like a saint when paired with Ryan Douchebag, but I just don't like her that much. Emotional wet blankets like that are such joykills. But I'll hold my judgment on her for the next episode.

A guy can be a take-charge person without being an aggressive door slamming foot stamping baby. And he can be a nice guy who listens and has empathy without being a dopey emotional cry baby. Why does it have to be one or the other? Jessica wanted a strong confident man. NOT a selfish overbearing man child. I can see her becoming more sensitive and emotional as time goes on, not because she's an oversensitive baby, but because of the the cumulative effect of Ryan's hair trigger temper and overly aggressive "jokes". She is feeling vulnerable. I don't see why it is solely Jessica's responsibility to "train" Ryan. Shouldn't he at least have some interest in trying to understand her, too? Flouncing around, muttering under your breath and saying that she's "too sensitive" or "too emotional" does not do anything to solve their problems. At this point I think Jessica is a little afraid of him. 

[SaucyMommy]

I don't think you should have to train a man. Is this the 1950s? Men have manners. Ryan d is just a steamrolling, arrogant jerk. He's been coddled and thinks very high of himself.

I read the thread on davina and Sean on the other forum linked from here. I actually can see what Sean's coworker was saying. If he in fact never stayed there, and was only there for filming - I would be mad like davina! I may change my tune on her. I don't like Sean

[Snarklepuss]

          From my 50 years of experience I've found that guys that are arseholes at the beginning of a relationship only

         get worse as time goes by.  If you want to train someone and teach them not to have tantrums, adopt a toddler.

 

There is only so much you can do with a guy but my jury is out yet on just how big an arsehole Ryan D. really is.  He may not be a terminal one.  From what we have seen so far he just seems to me to be typically "young male clueless", but not necessarily unable or unwilling to grow up. The only way Jessica can find out is by giving him a chance to show what he's really made of.  I don't think she has given him much of a chance so far.  She seemed closed off to him right away.  If I had not given Mr. Snarklepuss a chance I'd probably never have married him.

[Snarklepuss]

"Hair trigger temper"?  We see one scene of Ryan D. blowing up (which is arguably because Jessica re-opened an issue that he thought was worked out put to rest) and that means he has a hair trigger temper?  Jeesh, I wouldn't want anyone to see my reaction if someone did that to me on camera to make me look like an asshole.  And I don't have a "hair trigger temper" either.  Jessica seems to have been intent on "getting him back" for an offense that he didn't really intend.  He is a little clumsy about expressing himself without putting his foot in his mouth but I didn't sense that he really had any intentions of insulting her.   She should have been able to give him a break for being nervous and not knowing how NOT to step on a typical female minefield.  It's just like the "do I look fat in these pants" trap.  I suspect Ryan doesn't yet know that he should plead the 5th on questions like that and not offer his opinion on things like tattoos. 

 

Once when I was new on the internet on a chat board I frequented almost 20 years ago the topic of tattoos came up and I revealed that I didn't like them and thought they were trashy and low class.  This was well before tattoos became as popular as they are now.   I was not alone, either because a lot of people posted the same opinion Well, we didn't see it coming that we had offended a fair number of people on the board.  I never imagined that there were so many people who would have tattoos and be so sensitive about them.  Some of the people were my online friends, too.  I really learned a lesson from that.  Sometimes you have to be socially savvy about how people might take what you say.  I certainly didn't mean to insult friends of mine.  I would never feel that my friends are trashy and low class whether or not they had tattoos either.  I had to eat a lot of crow after that.  That's one reason I can give Ryan a break for his comment and wish Jessica would lighten up on him for being a little clueless.

[Snarklepuss]

I have to say that just based on what I have seen of Jessica and Ryan, I'd rather be friends with Ryan than Jessica.  Jessica bugs me with her smirky passive-aggressive personality.  I can't imagine her in a law firm in NYC, at least not one that's very big or well known.  Mr. Snarklepuss is a lawyer and he can't either.    I am an executive assistant in a big corporation (and my mother was a legal secretary) and I can't either.  She doesn't strike me as very educated or very bright.

Edited April 24, 2015 by Snarklepuss

[Snarklepuss]

I don't think you should have to train a man. Is this the 1950s? Men have manners. Ryan d is just a steamrolling, arrogant jerk. He's been coddled and thinks very high of himself.

 

I certainly think men should have manners and not need to be trained to have them, but to expect them to know what you want when you are always withholding that information from them is not fair either.  Expecting a guy to read your mind and using the fact that he doesn't just automatically understand that your silence doesn't mean that you are happy against him is not fair either.  And that's what I think Jessica has done to Ryan.  A relationship is a two way street.  People have to educate each other to know what the other wants from them, what their preferences are.  A lot of guys would just leave the toilet seat up if there wasn't a woman around to "train" them otherwise.  It's not the 1950s but the more things change between men and women, the more the remain the same, IMHO.

[shopper73]

Did you see the preview with Ryan D storming out again? That is just his machismo MO, and unless Jessica wants to live that way she better say divorce at the end of the experiment, cause he is not gonna change. I think he does talk the talk and can be very reasonable when his buttons aren't being pushed at other times. He would not be for me, however.

[The Evil One]

Is it me or are the experts less involved this year? It seemed like in Season 1 that they intervened or were more available to help the couples sort through conflict. Maybe they just aren't showing it. In a case like Ryan and Jessica, they sure could use help in their communication styles. She's obviously not comfortable in asking for what she wants and maybe she could do it if she felt like she had a referee in the room.

Davina and Sean are done. He's completely checked out. She's demanding, inflexible and emotionally exhausting. He doesn't seem like any prize either. I understand Manhattan was one of her dealbreakers and either the experts are at fault or Sean thought he wouldn't mind before he had to deal with the reality of it. That said, Davina could have at least thrown the guy a bone. Couldn't their temporary move been to the West Side so the guy could be closer to a bridge or tunnel to get back out to Jersey? I mean, she gave him nothing. If they had moved to a new neighborhood, maybe that would have helped make Sean feel like they were both in it together a little bit more. And finally, the "intimacy" thing - it seems to me that Davina knows she is losing him and is putting sex on the table in an explicit way to try to woo him back.

At least we have Jaclyn and Good Ryan!

[CindyBee]

Is it me or are the experts less involved this year? It seemed like in Season 1 that they intervened or were more available to help the couples sort through conflict. Maybe they just aren't showing it. In a case like Ryan and Jessica, they sure could use help in their communication styles. She's obviously not comfortable in asking for what she wants and maybe she could do it if she felt like she had a referee in the room.

 

 

That was my thought too, where is Dr. Pepper or even that goof Dr. Cilona when you need them to help Jessica & Ryan out!!?    I have a poor memory of season 1 but I think I remember the experts showing up pretty early on in the process to talk things out with the couples.   

 

Here we are on day 14 and one couple (Sean & Davina) are doomed, another couple (Ryan & Jessica) are teetering on the edge of a massive blow up and one couple (Ryan & Jaclyn) that might never be seen again cause she has rediscovered sex.  So yeah, thank goodness for Jaclyn & Ryan cause I doubt I'd finish out the season if it wasn't for them.

[JapMo]

 

Did you see the preview with Ryan D storming out again? That is just his machismo MO, and unless Jessica wants to live that way she better say divorce at the end of the experiment, cause he is not gonna change. I think he does talk the talk and can be very reasonable when his buttons aren't being pushed at other times. He would not be for me, however.

 

I'm waiting to see why he stormed out. I like them both and think they have a chance (yeah, I know...I'm one of the few), but Jessica has already confided that she has a pattern with men in her life that they cheat or don't treat her right, and I think she's kind of like Jaime (a la the cigarrette issue) that once something happens she blows it up in her head that 'oh, here we go again'.

[essexjan]

Well, who'da thunk it? Davina made Sean look like the kind, reasonable one in that relationship. She's so entitled and demanding. I think Sean's just marking time until the experiment's over so he can get an annulment. But there was a LOL moment for me when he told her how much more financially successful she is than him. Seriously, Davina, what did you expect from a reality show? A friggin' hedge fund manager? Anyway, here's the exact "oh shit" moment when she heard the news.

 

 

There aren't enough words to say how awful Ryan D is. Except that he looked fat in that tracksuit. There. I said it. Fat-shaming a douchebag. I am going to hell.

 

Their apartment was available on 1 February, so it'd probably been rented just for the show, as someone said upthread.

 

https://www.cityspade.com/listings/211205-363-7th-avenue-brooklyn-ny-11215-for-rent

 

I think Ryan R and Jaclyn will love Astoria, if they stay there after the show's finished (that is, if they've stayed married). I visit friends there regularly - and I've actually planned to have my birthday party there next month. If I lived in New York it'd probably be in Astoria. There's lots going on, great restaurants, beautiful parks, a Costco (Costco!), and plenty of people Ryan and Jaclyn's age. Plus it's only about 20 minutes into Manhattan on the subway.

 

I have hopes for Ryan R and Jaclyn. I really hope they make it. The others I couldn't care less about, except that I'm enjoying the Sean/Davina trainwreck.

Edited April 24, 2015 by essexjan

[mamey2422]

I know it is all arranged by the show but I thought it was strange that Davina and Sean were able to find a building/landlord that allowed them to rent for just a month. Maybe that's common in NYC.

[Waterlilly]

I loved Jaclyn's house! She really had it comfy, although too girls for a couple. I think Ryan liked it too, just not the location. He is a realtor and she is a sales person (even said that she had thought about real estate), they would make a great team and make a nice living. They could live where ever they want. I am hoping the best for them.

I think maybe Ryan D is getting a rough edit, not saying he hasn't been a butt, he just reminds me of my brothers who think they are tough guys but their very long term wives know exactly how to handle them, lol. I know it is not the '50's but there is an art to showing them that there are benefits to a happy wife (of course I don't mean games), it takes two.

S and D...no words.

[Bandolero]

I don't know about Jaclyn. She just seems so forced to me. Almost like she is forcing herself to like him because he is supposedly such a great guy. She does not come across as authentic IMO. 

 

If I knew that somebody that I was dating was so taken aback by me in the beginning... I don't think I could have a relationship with that person even if they supposedly had a change of heart .She wasn't attracted to him, didn't even find him attractive, treated him like a buddy with punches to the arm and all that; so I find it hard to buy this lovey-dovey stuff just like I didn't believe it with Jamie and Doug. I guess time will tell.

[mamey2422]

I don't know about Jaclyn. She just seems so forced to me. Almost like she is forcing herself to like him because he is supposedly such a great guy. She does not come across as authentic IMO.

If I knew that somebody that I was dating was so taken aback by me in the beginning... I don't think I could have a relationship with that person even if they supposedly had a change of heart .She wasn't attracted to him, didn't even find him attractive, treated him like a buddy with punches to the arm and all that; so I find it hard to buy this lovey-dovey stuff just like I didn't believe it with Jamie and Doug. I guess time will tell.

I love Jaclyn and Ryan and feel their relationship is the most authentic of the three. BUT I get what you're saying because I feel the show left out a big moment for them as a couple in terms of Jaclyn seeing Ryan differently. In the talking heads and even more so in some of the extended clips Jaclyn mentions a talk they had at the end of their honeymoon where Ryan said he didn't want to be just friends and wanted the relationship to move forward. I feel like he took control of things and this helped "flipped the switch" for Jaclyn. This is on top of the natural progression of getting to know someone and essentially date them even though they're married has morphed their relationship. I'm really rooting for them. Edited April 25, 2015 by mamey2422

[Waterlilly]

Just watched this epi again. Ryan does say there are two closets, this scene is really chopped up.

[Snarklepuss]

I know it is all arranged by the show but I thought it was strange that Davina and Sean were able to find a building/landlord that allowed them to rent for just a month. Maybe that's common in NYC.

 

I did that once in NY about 7 years ago.  In my case it was for 2 months while I helped my Dad fix up his apartment.  A young man was going overseas for the summer and rented his apartment to me.  He owned the apartment.  You can find anything on Craig's List.  I kind of doubt that guy that showed them the apartment was a landlord.  Building manager or superintendent of a co-op or condo., perhaps.  Some buildings allow sublets.

[Vicky8675309]

WTF is wrong with Jessica? She wants BOTH CLOSETS and the drawer? Greedy! Then she expects him to be psychic~~read her mind…psycho.

Girl, learn how to say what you are thinking without being all sly about it. He asked what your were snarking about and you didn't tell him you wanted both closets or 1 and 1/2 closets. I guess you (by "you" I am referring to Jessica) were too busy plotting out what you were going to say on camera to throw him under the bus and look like the victim. Prior to the season you came off as a fame whore (they all are or they wouldn't be on tv imo) who wants to be an actress (I see your fake acting) rather than a trashy, oops, I mean glamor girl "model".

I guess your acting isn't that bad since many are fooled after your spur of the moment plan to play up the "trash" comment. It was purposefully misheard as "you are trashy" rather than "piercings are trashy but yours looks good on you". Yeah, some guys say stupid stuff and it is easy to put a spin on it when in public (especially when no one overheard the conversation) to create your "drama" moment that paints you as the terrorized victim and him as the abusive bully. I see what you are doing. Girl, if you really are fearful and "walking on eggshells" then is your FAME WHORE desire to be on tv really worth your personal safety? If so then please fuck off. If not then GTFO….lol

You aren't walking on eggshell…you are too busy sneaking off for one on one camera time to "trash" Ryan. He is immature but I am getting the impression you are manipulating it all…fuck, you are a good actress! I may be totally wrong and you are just a passive aggressive doormat who make women look weak and wishy washy…. Jessica just rubs me wrong. I'm all for helping out woman who need help (in abusive relationships) but there is something about you that seems fake or personality disorder or something insincere. Maybe it is because you are on reality tv and your segment are so choppy that they seem to be edited in your favor (you are Dr. C's favorite and he will through Ryan under the bus for/with you)

[Aethera]

Hey folks - we're getting a little intense with our arguments on this episode.  I totally understand that these couples can be polarizing, but we'd appreciate it if we could keep it a little lighter here.  Not saying anyone has to stop snarking or disagreeing, just dial down the intensity.

 

I think sometimes, we see ourselves in the cast members we support or side with, and when someone attacks a cast member, it can feel like an attack on us.  Please keep in mind that when someone is calling Ryan a jerk, they're talking about Ryan, not about you.  For those doing the often-justified name calling, avoiding generalizing things onto an entire gender might be a good idea.

 

Now back to your regularly scheduled snark on an oh-so-snarkable show!

[Liberty]

Hey folks - we're getting a little intense with our arguments on this episode. 

 

 

Totally hear you!

 

It is interesting how the perception of the characters changes as more is revealed about them from episode to episode and clip to clip.

[SaucyMommy]

Agreed! She's not a great communicator. But neither is Ryan. The closet thing re watching was a comedy of miscommunication. A theme in their relationship

[Xena1833]

I think it isn't only the process itself or Manhattan that's overwhelming Sean but Davina herself.  She is so demanding and full of herself I can't imagine most guys wouldn't react the same way.  Granted Sean himself has issues but Davina's are just the opposite of what he would need to feel comfortable in the situation.  She is acting like she wants to be married, goddammit, but he is not going to give her what she wants.  What she said to him about income so obviously showed him that she's already convinced that he will resent her so she's not even going to give him a chance.  She already has an apartment she wants him to live in.  Never mind what he might have wanted.  Nothing about this is what Sean wants.  She is unwilling to give in.  I can understand that it might not be 100% her fault if she told the experts that Manhattan was a deal breaker.  Even if Sean was amenable to that in theory, seeing how it's playing itself out is completely intimidating and with good reason.  If he were with someone like Jessica shopping for an apartment in NY would have been more of a compromise and less intimidating (in fact at this point I can see him matched with her better than Davina).  Sean is the one who would have to do all the compromising with Davina.  And I suspect she is like that about everything.

You are right on with this. She does not want to compromise at all. She is expecting Sean to make all the sacrifice for someone he's known for 5 minutes! She is very full of herself. All this whining about being picked on as a child because of her ethnicity is B.S. I mean she acts like she is the only ethnic person to have ever experienced any kind of taunting. Get over it already!

There is something very cold about her demeanor. I don't think she is a very nice person. Sean needs to see the red flags, cut his losses and move on!!

[Wings]

We don't know how much production had to do with choosing where they live.  I have a hunch that was decided way ahead of time and they just filmed the reactions to what TPTB chose.  Hard to believe they all went apartment shopping; that can take days if not weeks.   

[Neurochick]

Davina is married to her success, Manhattan and financial status. She'd rather live in a shoe box for a gazillion dollars than a big house with yard and healthier air. To each their own.

I feel for Sean, I don't think he'll make it. I think he is just realizing that moving to a radically different place IS a deal breaker for him. He seems to be loosing interest rapidly.

The final touch was the way she asked for more romance: "I need that s**t! Court me". Sure, you just got him in the mood, boss.

 

Here's my thing.  Not everybody wants a large house.  I have a friend who would love to live in a shoebox because it's easier to clean.  When you have a large house, someone has to clean it; if you have a yard, someone has to maintain that yard.  Somewhere, I think in the US, people became entitled to think that they NEEDED a large house with a huge back yard, spa tub, en suite bathroom, master bedroom.  Older homes aren't like that and are easier to clean.  I don't get why we all need so much space today.  

 

Now, back to the couples.  As for training a man or a woman, perhaps train isn't the correct word.  I see these couples as learning how to dance.  They need to learn when to go forward, when to go back, when to go right, when to go left.  When you first learn to dance, say waltz, with someone, you might step on each other's toes or get the rhythm wrong; sometimes if you practice you'll get it, but sometimes you might need a new partner.  

Edited April 25, 2015 by Neurochick

[Bella]

Here's my thing.  Not everybody wants a large house.  I have a friend who would love to live in a shoebox because it's easier to clean.  When you have a large house, someone has to clean it; if you have a yard, someone has to maintain that yard.  Somewhere, I think in the US, people became entitled to think that they NEEDED a large house with a huge back yard, spa tub, en suite bathroom, master bedroom.  Older homes aren't like that and are easier to clean.  I don't get why we all need so much space today.  

 

I have a variation of the same thought, Neurochick. I like living in a high-density neighborhood where I can pick up mass transit or a cab easily. To me, driving is a huge time waster. If someone else (bus driver, train conductor, etc.) is managing my transportation, I can read, which is something I value. I hate having to drive to shop, dine out, get coffee, etc.

 

An environmental analysis a couple of years ago showed that if everyone in NYC had a home with a yard, we'd need two additional New York States to accommodate that. City planners are now pushing high density because it allows for more shared green space, fewer trees destroyed, etc. I totally endorse that.

 

But ... if others will accept my preferences as valid, I will grant theirs as valid, too. Did the MAFS couples get an opportunity to sell each other on the advantages of their preferred living environments? Did this come up in the 150 pages of individual information that the "experts" supposedly collected. Did the "experts" care? Did the "experts" consider that all of these people have jobs and they can't just up and abandon those jobs in order to be on a TV show for a few weeks? Did the "experts" consider that all of these people have to get to and from these jobs that they can't abandon? Did the "experts" take into account transportation options, time, etc.? I doubt it.