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Small Talk: Ughngnggh! Ugghhnnn!


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And if he got a tan. I'm still traumatized from seeing his pasty chest in "Infected".

 

That didn't bother me. He's a really white English boy! But didn't he have hair on his chest once? Maybe that mighty beard sucked all the follicles from everywhere else.

 

What has always annoyed me on this show is the utterly, obviously fake animals they use. Every time I saw Daryl with the dead squirrels or a rabbit, it made me roll my eyes. Cringeworthy. What's the budget for the animals on this show anyway? 1.99$ per episode? They looked like grade school children made them from papier mache and covered them with old felt. How much would it cost to make a few fake-fur covered bags stuffed with a pound of sawdust and give the critters the appearance of having once been alive?

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That didn't bother me. He's a really white English boy! But didn't he have hair on his chest once? Maybe that mighty beard sucked all the follicles from everywhere else.

 

Although I'm not English, I share AL's pasty white skin, and I never understand what we're supposed to do about it.  We're far more likely to develop skin cancer, and frankly I'm happy that this is one of the few shows that doesn't require its actors to be spray tanned to the point of absurdity.

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Although I'm not English, I share AL's pasty white skin, and I never understand what we're supposed to do about it.  We're far more likely to develop skin cancer, and frankly I'm happy that this is one of the few shows that doesn't require its actors to be spray tanned to the point of absurdity.

 

Speaking for pasty redheads everywhere, we don't tan, we burn.  Vampires are less likely to burst into flames than we are. Spray tanner is also out, it just turns us into pumpkins.

Edited by GreyBunny
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Quote

Although I'm not English, I share AL's pasty white skin, and I never understand what we're supposed to do about it.  We're far more likely to develop skin cancer, and frankly I'm happy that this is one of the few shows that doesn't require its actors to be spray tanned to the point of absurdity.

 

Amen. I'm one of those white-skinned people of Irish heritage and gone through more than one episode of skin cancer so I couldn't agree more.

 

On the subject of esthetics, I also like that this show doesn't require the now mandatory masses of carefully cultivated muscle and cheese-cutter abs, both of which I despise.

 

I liked what AL had to say:

xZgkgHp.jpg

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kikismom can I give you 6 thumbs up? I freaking love Deadwood! My old boss used to like it too so I got to walk in to work in the morning and shout SWEEGIN! COCK SUCKA! And everything in my formative years set me up to hate Deadwood. I do NOT watch westerns because my dad ONLY watched westerns as in we had that random channel that just played Bonanza, Wagon Train, Gunsmoke, Big Valley etc etc and that's all he frikkin watched. And I hated it. I would have thrown a brick through the tv if my tiny arm coulda hefted it. I hate, hate hate westerns. What possessed me to turn Deadwood on I have no idea, but I was hooked. I watch Ray Donovan because Trixie is in it, I watch everything the other prostitute does too. Lots of SOA overlap, Unser was on Deadwood. That other prostitute (and I'm blanking on her name) was with Jax and Tara caught them and we got naked Jax butt. They just shot her on SOA few episodes ago.

 

When I watch other shows and somebody goes off an a monologue I say they're talking to a head in a box or blowjob soliloquy. omg now I has a sad and need to watch Deadwood.

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Although I'm not English, I share AL's pasty white skin, and I never understand what we're supposed to do about it.

Thank you to everyone who pushed back against the snark on Lincoln's God-given fair complexion. I think it's thoughtless and insulting to use "pasty" as a synonym for "fair-skinned." That word should be reserved for someone who looks sickly. (Are you telling me my gorgeous English girlfriend Michelle Dockery is "pasty"? Really?)  A person who exercises, eats right, and gets enough sleep will have a healthy glow that has nothing to do with melanin level. And while I'm the first to admit that a bit of a suntan can look nice on someone whose skin is prone to tanning, I personally find it most attractive when people stay pretty close to their natural skin tone. If you prefer people with tans, you're entitled to your preference, but a little sensitivity would be nice for those of us who can't change our complexion any more than we can change our height. (And why should we?)

 

(Quick shout-out to my fair-complected brothers and sisters! Half German--one-quarter Irish--all woman. I invest more time and money on my un-tan than Jennifer Aniston probably does on her tan. In a small Southern city where a lot of women still bake themselves crispy, I proudly rock my fair, bare legs.  My husband says I'm milky. MILKY.)

 

Well, dermatologists all around the world rejoice at his proud display of that "pasty" chest.

He is as God made him.

To me he is perfect.

Haha, I see what you did there!

Edited by Portia
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Well... my family incorporates a mix of English, French, Greek, Scots-Irish, Cherokee, and Tuscarora*, so we're all over the map complexion-wise. My older daughter and I tan every time we step outside the house, while my younger daughter needs SPF 100+ to get the mail without also getting a sunburn. So I ain't faulting AL on nothing.

ETA:

* Yes, I am apparently descended from a long line of traveling salesmen.

Edited by Nashville
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Also I am rewatching Jericho--this would be a good time to try it out for those who never saw the show. Not that many episodes, so easier to catch up with than the Mentalist (yes the Red John thing never stops---gag!)

Still mad we only got 1-1/2 seasons of Jericho. That show was awesome.

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I feel like I've stumbled onto an Entertainment Weekly blog.

 

Nope! I did stumble upon it the other day on my homepage (now changed) and got a thrilling account of how Brazil's newly-crowned "Miss BumBum" had to get a ton of industrial silicone (or something) sucked out of her ass.

 

That makes our discussion look like a MENSA convention.XD

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I wonder if AL took his chest to Brazil for a good waxing?  Leave the squirrel nest on top, and the Jeremiah Johnson-worthy growth on his face, but take off the rest of it.

Well... if they run out of wax, they can always substitute silicone in a pinch.

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Still mad we only got 1-1/2 seasons of Jericho. That show was awesome.

Judging by the viewer rebellion, we are not alone---I still think it got canceled because the guy behind the evil plot was a little (read: a lot) similar to Dick Cheney.

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Judging by the viewer rebellion, we are not alone---I still think it got canceled because the guy behind the evil plot was a little (read: a lot) similar to Dick Cheney.

Wonder what they did with all the peanuts from the first time the network tried to cancel it...?

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Wonder what they did with all the peanuts from the first time the network tried to cancel it...?

Being a network, they probably gave them to their undocumented migrant household staff for their Christmas Bonus.

 

I had an elementary school music teacher who kept a big burlap 2-bushel sack of peanuts in the shell next to her piano. She never even talked to us. She would just hold up flash cards with musical notes and if you yelled out the correct answer "C flat! B sharp!" she would jam her hand into the sack and pitch a peanut to you. As though we were monkeys at the zoo. She had just plain given up.

In fairness, a lot of the kids were hungry and enjoyed music class quite nicely.

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I had a history teacher that if you fell asleep, lacked attention or were otherwise goofing off he tossed chalk board erasers at your head. and a really really really really hippie music teacher total flower child. she seriously got off on us having our little sand blocks, tambourines and bong bong bong chimey things. ( I do not know they're proper names)

 

And ditto on Ian McShane I love everything he does. He coulda played Beth and made me love her.

Edited by nachomama
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 a really really really really hippie music teacher total flower child. she seriously got off on us having our little bong bong bong chimey things. ( I do not know they're proper names)

I think the proper name is "paraphenalia".

But mine never chimed. Maybe you aren't using it right.

 

Or as Bart Simpson said, "I never knew something could suck and blow at the same time."

Edited by kikismom
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There's a reason why you almost never see redheads on shows like Survivor, the tropical sun is just too much.  I quit watching a while ago but out of the 20 or so seasons I did watch I saw exactly one redhead.
 

Quick shout-out to my fair-complected brothers and sisters! Half German--one-quarter Irish--all woman. I invest more time and money on my un-tan than Jennifer Aniston probably does on her tan. In a small Southern city where a lot of women still bake themselves crispy, I proudly rock my fair, bare legs.  My husband says I'm milky. MILKY.

 

*high-fives Portia while standing in the shade, wearing a loose long-sleeved shirt, a wide-brimmed hat, and UVA/B sunscreen with a good SPF level*  

 

I live up north where it's cloudy and rains most of the year so it's less of a worry, but I have to put on extra sunscreen when I go skiing since reflected sun off the snow can still burn you.

 

My ancestors were Scandinavian and from the British Isles with some German mixed in.  Both of my parents are redheads (dad-carrot blonde, mom-auburn), so when I was born there was no question what color my hair would be, only what shade.  Mom could tan a little but dad and I just burn right up.  I started wearing sunscreen daily on my face at the age of 12 and while my peers' sun damage is starting to catch up to them (one who had regular appointments with tanning salons looked like a bag of wrinkles before she was 30) I look much younger than they do, and my dermatologist is pleased with how well I've taken care of my skin.

 

Topic?  AL was rocking his fine paleness negotiating with the lollicops.  

Edited by GreyBunny
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My parents families are both English/Scottish/German;  My siblings burn and freckle. I never burn or freckle, have dark brown hair, don't wrinkle or get gray hair.

 

I think it's time for a talk with my mother.

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I have a new boyfriend.  He is almost eight weeks old and probably the cutest little guy ever.  His mom comes to my infant program and, due to an infection in her milk ducts, had to switch him to a bottle until it clears.  The baby could not have been less interested in the bottle and rejected it completely.  The mother was frantic that he was starving but she was traumatized by the ordeal of trying to get him to latch onto the bottle.  His Dad, traumatized by the sight of his son rejecting the bottle, wouldn't even try even though babies often take a bottle better from someone other than their lactating mother.  Since it's actually my job, I sat with him and cajoled him into trying the bottle.  He screamed and cried and arched his back until he was worn out and then he drank the bottle.  It was horrible for both of us: him because he was distressed and me because I was causing him distress.  It went on like that for a couple of days, and then he adapted and I learned how he likes to be held as he feeds.  He takes the bottle well now and has come to associate me with food.  He stopped in the middle of tonight's bottle (I go by his apartment to give him his night bottle - don't tell my boss!) looked up at me and gave me a huge grin.  I am going to be so sad when his mother is all better and able to feed him again.  It'll be the worst breakup ever.

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Thank you to everyone who pushed back against the snark on Lincoln's God-given fair complexion. I think it's thoughtless and insulting to use "pasty" as a synonym for "fair-skinned." That word should be reserved for someone who looks sickly. (Are you telling me my gorgeous English girlfriend Michelle Dockery is "pasty"? Really?)  A person who exercises, eats right, and gets enough sleep will have a healthy glow that has nothing to do with melanin level. And while I'm the first to admit that a bit of a suntan can look nice on someone whose skin is prone to tanning, I personally find it most attractive when people stay pretty close to their natural skin tone. If you prefer people with tans, you're entitled to your preference, but a little sensitivity would be nice for those of us who can't change our complexion any more than we can change our height. 

 

I'm the one who made the, according to you, "snarky" and apparently insensitive comment about AL's pale chest. My God it was just a joke but you seem to think I meant to insult every fair-skinned person and sick person in the world. I'm white as hell and I can take the joke when someone tells me that my legs are blinding. So string me up for kidding about Rick's weird farmer's tan. Damn.

Edited by HalcyonDays
Snark to others
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I believe that early on I made a crack about pictures of AL from his British movies looking like pale/pasty English public (private) schoolboy. It's hard to gauge tone from printed comments. But I have more fear of writing "J/K" a dozen times day.

There's very little that I post that should be taken seriously.

tumblr_mihrmaJDmB1r55i5mo1_500.gif

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How wonderful! I'm sure the parents are grateful.

We won't tell your boss.

 

I'm sure this is not helpful, but who knows: whenever I had a calf that wouldn't take a bottle, I would press the palm of my hand gently on it's forehead. It feels like the udder which the little guy is used to pushing his forehead against when nursing. It also covers his eyes a little so the feeling without the view is more "normal". Never tried it with human baby switching from breast to bottle though.

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Dudes and Dudettes OMFG did Sons of Anarchy blow huge nonsensical chunks. Done, glory hallelujah! Should have ended with the next to last episode, the finale was downright boring. And they had 3 opportunities to take Jax out in a pseudo heroic manner, Marks dude coulda been a fight, the club coulda actually gone through with it, umm robo cop (peter weller) the betrayer coulda had a gun and he why run from the cop if he didn't intend on getting away? Lame. And I notice Tara is about the only one who didn't make an appearance to say goodbye. She did do the after show right when she got killed but Opie and Juice were there. And I just say the show been crap since they killed Opie.

 

I'm glad you're saving babies, Irishmaple, keep fighting the good fight.

 

My fight is to annoy my persnickety boss who hasn't given me a raise in 2 years. When you place anything on his desk he corrects you and says "credenza" so I purposely say desk and if pushed to say credenza I say it like GRUDUNZA like the cat in the hat. "moss-covered three-handled family grudunza."

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^holy crap "he corrects you and says credenza"?

 

I'm afraid I'd be doing:

"I put the report on your desk"

"Credenza!"

"Oh, right. Zedencra."

"Credenza!"

"That's what I meant. Derzenca."

"CREDENZA!"

"Oh, oh, I see, right. Renzecda."

"I'm going to kill you now!"

"Lawyer Lawyer! I got witnesses"

 

Then you don't have to get a raise or work at all. Just live off the out-of-court settlement.

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I do think a modicum of sensitivity is always a good idea when we're choosing labels (I'm reminded of when it dawned on me that my son didn't consider it a good thing to be called "skinny"), but Lord knows I can be insensitive . . . and clearly I misjudged my own tone. I wasn't deeply offended by a particular post; I was just trying to have a "hey, wait a minute" moment in the same spirit as some of the posts just before mine. I shouldn't have done it in a way that made anyone feel scolded.

Edited by HalcyonDays
Other posts edited, therefore line not needed.
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He really does correct you. It's hilarious. He must have some childhood trauma with desks because you simply cannot put things on desks. We have a large table up front aka "a desk" and the UPS man is not allowed to stack packages on it. If it's large items that come on a hand truck we have him wheel it to the back which isn't so weird because if they're heavy better he lift than me. But small boxes not even allowed to set down for a minute while I sign for the damn thing. He claims the boxes scuff the surface but it's not a wooden table that needs waxing it's literally painted in high gloss house paint. It's an ugly yellow color and we hammer grommets into things on it. It isn't about protecting the surface, he's just afraid of desks! It's a whole new phobia.

 

My weekend job I've actually considered taking a fall, stepping into a drain, it would sooooo be worth a broken ankle to be able to get out of there on workman's comp. I'd electrocute myself, jump in front of a bullet, you name it, it's that bad.

Edited by nachomama
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"It's hard to gauge tone from printed comments." Exactly.

 

Which is why I've edited a couple posts to remove stuff that snarks a little bit too much against others, before someone complains about it and gives me more work to do. Watch how you word things, people - in written form, certain "joking" lines can come off as more bitchy or attacking than maybe intended. It's just the nature of this type of communication. Carry on.

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One of my sisters worked 26 years for the police dept.; she was the Chief's secretary. She spent all day, every day, telling people he was in a meeting, or he was out on some conference, etc. Where he really was? Under his desk, curled up in the fetal position, crying. I swear to God. Day after day.

If people here only knew.

She just kept chanting pension pension pension like a mantra.

 

Before that she spent 6 years in the Army in Germany. She was trained to be some data entry clerk or something. But when she got there they didn't have the computers that were needed and they told her just sit there. She volunteered to do something else, but they said you can't your MOS (military occupation specialty) is to do this. So she and another girl spent 8 hours a day sitting in a room doing crossword puzzles. Then 2 other girls for the next 8 hours, then one more shift with 2 more girls doing the same thing.

Nothing.

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^holy crap "he corrects you and says credenza"?

 

I'm afraid I'd be doing:

"I put the report on your desk"

"Credenza!"

"Oh, right. Zedencra."

"Credenza!"

"That's what I meant. Derzenca."

"CREDENZA!"

"Oh, oh, I see, right. Renzecda."

"I'm going to kill you now!"

"Lawyer Lawyer! I got witnesses"

 

Then you don't have to get a raise or work at all. Just live off the out-of-court settlement.

I have no idea what this is all about, but it's funny as hell.

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Oh my gosh, that credenza shit is the funniest thing I've heard all week. I literally have tears streaming down my cheeks right now. I'm going to start calling our computer desk a credenza and see what Mr. Ghoulina thinks. 

 

 

Ahhhh, I seriously needed that laugh. Just got off the phone with the Mr. He was informed, via email, about a week back that he had won a $500 Visa gift card in this raffle the company that does HIS company's bidding software (he does commercial HVAC) was holding for Christmas. It never came to the house and we were wondering. Well, apparently it showed up at his work. It was addressed to him, but for some reason he thought he should ask one of the owners if she wanted it. He was somehow worried he shouldn't take it? But he was apparently expecting her to be all, "No, no, YOU won it, it's in your name, keep it". And she didn't. She took it. So now he's all pissed off. And I'm pissed off, because I'm like - "Why'd you offer?!!!??" 

 

So yea, credenzas make me feel much better. 

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Oh my gosh, that credenza shit is the funniest thing I've heard all week. I literally have tears streaming down my cheeks right now. I'm going to start calling our computer desk a credenza and see what Mr. Ghoulina thinks. 

 

 

Ahhhh, I seriously needed that laugh. Just got off the phone with the Mr. He was informed, via email, about a week back that he had won a $500 Visa gift card in this raffle the company that does HIS company's bidding software (he does commercial HVAC) was holding for Christmas. It never came to the house and we were wondering. Well, apparently it showed up at his work. It was addressed to him, but for some reason he thought he should ask one of the owners if she wanted it. He was somehow worried he shouldn't take it? But he was apparently expecting her to be all, "No, no, YOU won it, it's in your name, keep it". And she didn't. She took it. So now he's all pissed off. And I'm pissed off, because I'm like - "Why'd you offer?!!!??" 

 

So yea, credenzas make me feel much better. 

 

With all due respect, ghoulina, husbands can sometimes be SUCH fucking morons.   :-)

 

Credenzas are cabinets with no "kneehole" - that means you can't really use them for, or confuse them with, a desk.  According to this old schooler who lived with desks and credenzas long before the advent of the "computer", that is.  :-)

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Oh man that sucks about the gift card. But she sounds like karma gonna take a huge chunk outta her backside one of these days.

 

I feel like my boss goes home and says chifforobe and calls the couch a divan as well. And his house must have a name like Tara or the Ponderosa. And while I avoid ever saying the word chaise lounge  for fear of the mocking he probly drops it on the regular. And when cooking he speaks all normal then pronounces spices like in french or italian. BRING ME THE AUBERGINE! I want or-uh-gawn-o not oregano.

 

When I was a kid we didn't say "pasta" we said spaghetti and everything was spaghetti. Macaroni was elbows. But we didn't go around saying "orchietti or fusilli or penne" everything was just spaghetti. Now you gotta say it like Giada.

 

and technically my boss has a credenza alongside his actual desk. things must be placed on the credenza portion of the desk. but once again, if you've arranged it that way to make you an L shaped desk IT'S A DESK!

Edited by nachomama
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I've actually decided to start calling ALL pieces of furniture "credenza" -the bookshelf, the end table, my dresser. I don't know why, but I'm getting such a kick out of this. 


Oh man that sucks about the gift card. But she sounds like karma gonna take a huge chunk outta her backside one of these days.

 

I hope it puts the chunk back in my husband's backside! Sometimes he is too generous. He just got his Christmas bonus the week before and gave away most of it to my mother. She was having a rough time, so it wasn't undeserved. But that's just his nature. We're not struggling or anything, but $500 sure would have been nice. Oh well. 

 

I feel like my boss goes home and says chifforobe and calls the couch a divan as well.

 

My paternal grandparents called their couch a "divan"!!!! I remember being a kid and being so confused as to what the divan was.

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I remember on the original Star Trek (1967 or so).  In the episode "City on the Edge of Forever," after losing the "girl of his dreams," Kirk says "Let's get the hell out of here."  Well, back then no one said that on TV.  Let me tell you:  It made that scene even MORE compelling and emotional.  So, that's an example of judicious use.

 

Having said that, that's an argument for why AC should have allowed fuck instead of screw.  Let it be a one-time thing for effect.

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