S37.E12. We’re in Miami Baby! LIVE CHAT THREAD

[Rodney]

Jonathan & Ana reach Save first.

Route Info: Join lifeguards in a rescue training exercise.  One team member must drive a water machine while the other rides it.  They must rescue a dummy and bring it back to shore.

Jonathan & Ana get going on the task first.

Ana's going to be the operator since she can't swim.  Jonathan will be the crew.

Carson & Jack get to Save second.

Han & Holden get there third and last and also get started.

Edited May 16 by Rodney

[Browncoat]

Shit shit shit.

[Haleth]

AGHH!  I forgot this was on!  Just tuned in. 

[Rodney]

Jonathan & Ana have a hiccup in which Ana has to get off the machine long enough to push it in.  She's back on, though, and they're heading for the dummy.  Jonathan gets the dummy and has a bit of a time keeping it secure.  But he has it, and they sail back.

They're done in first place.

But Carson & Jack are stuck on their mobile, trying to hit the water.

[Lantern7]

1 minute ago, Haleth said:

AGHH!  I forgot this was on!  Just tuned in. 

Yeah, it would’ve made more sense to schedule the episode at 9:30, right?

[Rodney]

Carson & Jack are finally in the water, while Jonathan & Ana head for Sail.

Jonathan & Ana have a domino piece with a letter "E" as their first post-Scramble clue.

Carson & Jack reach their dummy, and Jack retrieves it.  He's struggling, though.

Han & Holden finally get started as Carson & Jack get back.  They're out in second place.

Han gets the dummy, while Carson & Jack get their domino piece.

Han & Holden get back with their dummy and get their clue.  They're in last, but not by much.

Carson & Jack split off from Jonathan & Ana and go for Soar.

Han & Holden also choose Soar next.

[Browncoat]

And Jonathan rears his ugly head, blaming Ana as usual.

[Rodney]

Jonathan & Ana are lost once again, and they switch to Soar since it's close.  And Jonathan wastes no time lambasting Ana for not leading them to the location of which she was more certain.

Dick.

Commercial.

[Lantern7]

Too bad this show isn’t a huge hit. I could open the door and hear the gnashing of all of the fans’ teeth anytime Jonathan gets passive-aggressive.

[dizzyd]

I wish the edit would ghost Jonathan, I don’t want to hear anything he has to say.

[chitowngirl]

I kinda hate they are doing the scramble tasks all at the same time. It’s much more enjoyable when they don’t know where the other teams are.

[Rodney]

3 minutes ago, Browncoat said:

And Jonathan rears his ugly head, blaming Ana as usual.

Not that I support what he specifically said, but I get him being mad this time.  If Ana had one location more certain than the other, then it might've just been easier to go to that one while they figure out the other one later.  He was right in his sentiment, but as usual, he found a way to be as douche-y about it as possible.

Edited May 16 by Rodney

[iMonrey]

You guys, I'm terrified J&A are gonna win. Between the wonky editing of the last episode and the weird 2-day scheduling it feels like the show knew they had a real turkey of a finale on their hands that nobody would like. It feels like a burn-off.

At the very least it sucks that with only three teams left it means that much more of Jonathan we have to watch.

[Lantern7]

I still miss TARCon. Even with Jonathan, at least we’d be all together in the cringing.

[rr2911]

Alyssa and Josiah lost because of him!

[Lantern7]

“Soar” looks unbelievably scary.

[Browncoat]

1 minute ago, Lantern7 said:

I still miss TARCon. Even with Jonathan, at least we’d be all together in the cringing.

I miss TARCon, too.

[Rodney]

Carson & Jack reach Soar first, but they don't seem to think that maybe Jonathan & Ana might've gone for another task first.

Roadblock: Who's ready to go above and beyond.
One member of each team much soar on some kind of flying water device for at least a minute.

Jack takes the task since it's heights-related, and Carson is afraid of heights.

[MerBearHou]

You don’t want to know what I am hoping for Jonathan in Soar — hint:  faceplant, then bellyflop, then fall off.

[Rodney]

Just now, Browncoat said:

I miss TARCon, too.

Why did they stop those?

Han & Holden reach Soar, and Han takes it.  She's excited to do so.

[Lantern7]

Just now, MerBearHou said:

You don’t want to know what I am hoping for Jonathan in Soar — hint:  faceplant, then bellyflop, then fall off.

No such luck.

ALL OF THE SLACK.

[Browncoat]

Ana's taking it.  Could be interesting.

[Rodney]

Jonathan & Ana reach Soar now and see that they're in last.

Ana will do it, and I anticipate her freaking out at the water.

[MerBearHou]

Well, shoot — Ana’s doing it.  

[Rodney]

Jack makes his first attempt.  He fails after seven or eight seconds.

[momlyd]

There's a crab!

[Rodney]

Han makes her first try.  She fails imediately.

Now it's Ana's turn.

[Lantern7]

Ana is helpless in water. Maybe she ate a Devil Fruit that makes her not lunge at her husband’s throat? 🤓🤷‍♂️

[Rodney]

Ana makes her first attempt.  She fails after two seconds.

[mojoween]

“There’s a crab!”  No, Jack, Jonathan is over there on the shore.

[Rodney]

Ana is already in a panic.

[Lantern7]

How many of you have ever ridden a hoverboard? It seems like experience with that would help you out here.

[Browncoat]

I feel bad for Ana.  I would not enjoy this challenge at all.

[Rodney]

Jack fails again.

Han goes again and is keeping herself up so far.  She fails after twelve seconds.

Ana also fails again.

Jack goes for his third try, and fails quickly again.

Han fails again after eighteen seconds.

Ana fails again immediately.

[Pepper the Cat]

Poor Ana.

[Lantern7]

Aw, shit, Ana is breaking. That’s worrisome if she had a normal partner.

[Rodney]

Jack and Han each fail again repeatedly.

Ana is starting to cry now.  Poor thing.

[Browncoat]

Just now, Pepper the Cat said:

Poor Ana.

On so many levels.

[MerBearHou]

This is not going to help Ana with her terror of water.

[dizzyd]

I like Ana’s encouraging guide. Take notes Jonathan. 

[Lamb18]

Hannah should pretend she's surfing.

[Good Queen Jane]

At least Ana has an empathetic trainer. It must feel strange to her.

[Jaundiced Eye]

43 minutes ago, Quilt Fairy said:

Of course, for the finale, I have a severe thunderstorm warning and a tornado warning in place.  

Same here.

[Rodney]

Just now, Lamb18 said:

[Han] should pretend she's surfing.

She's done the best of everybody so far.  She's had the longest run of eighteen seconds.

[Lantern7]

I have to say it: if you watch one month of the upcoming Big Brother, Jonathan will wind up looking normal by comparison. I’d put money on that.

Edited May 16 by Lantern7

[momlyd]

Just now, Good Queen Jane said:

At least Ana has an empathetic trainer. It must feel strange to her.

I know right?

[iMonrey]

Man, the "clang clang clang clang clang" guy is getting a real workout on this challenge.

[Lantern7]

“You know what? Thirty seconds. Fuck it, we gotta wrap it up by tonight.”

[Grizzly]

Ana, close your mouth if you don't want to drink sea water!

[Lantern7]

YES! Jack finally nails it!