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Larry Bloom: Milquetoast Man at Home


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Jason Biggs is doing his best in a fairly thankless role here. Honestly, I resent any time Larry takes up on the show, because I like the other characters so much more. Would not be sad to see less of him in the future seasons, but I have a feeling he's still going to be a big part of Piper's story.

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I don't like Larry, but I'm not sure how much of that stems from despising Jason Biggs.

 

Larry doesn't deserve to be a New York Times columnist.   He doesn't deserve to be on NPR.   But there he is, reaping the rewards of schmoozing and turning a buck on his fiancee's downfall -- and feeling really, really good about himself.

 

I don't get it.   He exudes tedium.   He's not even interesting enough to hate.   What did Piper see in him in the first place?  Was she searching for an oasis of mediocrity after coming off her prolonged Alex rush?

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I don't like Larry, but I'm not sure how much of that stems from despising Jason Biggs.

 

Larry doesn't deserve to be a New York Times columnist.   He doesn't deserve to be on NPR.   But there he is, reaping the rewards of schmoozing and turning a buck on his fiancee's downfall -- and feeling really, really good about himself.

 

I don't get it.   He exudes tedium.   He's not even interesting enough to hate.   What did Piper see in him in the first place?  Was she searching for an oasis of mediocrity after coming off her prolonged Alex rush?

Honestly, that's pretty much my theory. He's part of the life she sees herself as part of, so she married in. Also, he's not bright enough to take advantage of her (I know he eventually did, but he needed her completely isolated and to have the full power of the judicial system on his side to even give him the idea, let alone pull it off).

I think he sees himself as a big man now because he pulled something off that he didn't owe to his parents' money and social position, and at this point Piper's not in a position to disabuse him.

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Larry's attitude towards Piper's plight is epitomized in his last phone conversation with her, when he says something like "Who wants to kill you this time?" as if she's one of those dysfunctional types who can't get along with people at the office.   You get almost no sense from him that she's really and truly in prison.   Instead, it's as if they're participants in a high-end role-playing game.

 

But I accuse the show itself of the same offense.   Litchfield doesn't seem very genuine.   The inmates rarely seem to suffer true hardships, just a whole lot of inconvenience.  

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In the show, Piper had a job. She quit it for the soap company thing but I assume it was bringing some money in. For Larry? I think that's called Mom and Dad.

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Somehow it had never even occurred to me that Larry had a thread when I posted those pieces by Larry Smith in, variously, the book and media threads.  And apparently I've even posted here before.  Ha.  Well.

 

As for Biggs, I'm not clutching my pearls over the joke per se, because I can have a pretty dark sense of humor myself.  But tweeting it was a really really dumb move, and he definitely should have known better. 

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(edited)

I have a very dark sense of humor too, one that would make Biggs' joke look like it belongs on a Dixie Riddle Cup.

 

But only a total fucking moron or a total fucking asshole would post something like that publicly, especially in the immediate aftermath.

Edited by millennium
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I just have to say Piper calling him the moon was the most perfect description of a character I could think of.

 

I wouldn't mind never seeing Larry again. One thing I do like about their scenes is how Piper talks so profusely about how she loves him and cares for him but seems to have nothing but varying degrees of frustration to disdain when they are actually together.

 

What did Piper see in him in the first place?  Was she searching for an oasis of mediocrity after coming off her prolonged Alex rush?

 

 

I think she liked being the Alex in the relationship to a degree. The one who shines. The one who is adored and desired. Although she was actually the Alex in her relationship with Alex, too, but I don't think she knew that, at the time.

 

But I imagine having a boyfriend who fits in with her friends and she can do Yuppie NY things with was very appealing, in general.  I find him boring as hell but I can definitely see how he could seem nice and interesting.

Edited by CherithCutestory
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Oh, no! What about all of his tangling plotlines? Does he ever get to ejaculate while masturbating?! What new way will he be able to use Piper's incarceration for his own professional gain? What about all the women close to Piper he hasn't slept with?  Will we never get a scene with him kissing her mother to teach Piper a lesson?

 

Darn, how will the show go on.

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