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Season 11 Episode Recaps and Recap Schedule

LilWharveyGal

By LilWharveyGal
in Sister Wives

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the-grey-lady

the-grey-lady

One my plans for the day, in between bouts of binge-drinking to block out Meri's eyebrows, is to tackle the episode 7 recap.

We will soon all know the answer to the all-important question "why not one house?"

Spoiler answer: FOR SO MANY REASONS. THESE PEOPLE HATE EACH OTHER.

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Kohola3

Kohola3

31 minutes ago, Kyanight said:

With four wives he probably says that most nights.  At least to Robyn.  I'm surprised it hasn't worn out.

I'm thinking his obsession with Robochin is more that she's making herself unavailable as much as possible.  She sleeps until noon and when he's in bed with her there are one or two co-sleeping kids.  Absence makes the heart dick grow fonder and all.

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suomi

suomi

Yeah, but what about the bathroom, the guest room, the walk-in closet, the pantry?

A few years back Faith Hill chided Tim McGraw for telling Oprah and the world (and their daughters) that the pantry was their playpen. (Oprah sorta asked and Tim straight up answered).

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Kyanight

Kyanight

3 minutes ago, suomi said:

Yeah, but what about the bathroom, the guest room, the walk-in closet, the pantry?

A few years back Faith Hill chided Tim McGraw for telling Oprah and the world (and their daughters) that the pantry was their playpen. (Oprah sorta asked and Tim straight up answered).

If Robyn had to get her virginity back, she doesn't seem the type to do it anywhere but in the bedroom - in the dark - missionary position.

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suomi

suomi

(edited)

Maybe. Could be. But I bet the cookie/virginity bit was strictly PR, just an act for the public. I suspect that Kody had 20 or however many years of missionary and then Robyn introduced him to other delights.

He floated 10 feet off the ground around her. Going against all previous  history and behavior, he chose her wedding dress. Christine gave us a Real Housewives moment when she walked away from the talking head couch over that, on camera. Robyn got a, what, 10-day honeymoon. If he could have, he would have phoned in appearing at Truely's birth. He was all dialed in to the care and feeding of Sol and Areola and sloughed off Truely when the wives went out of town.

I think every bit of that spells pussy-whipped. 

Edited by suomi
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xwordfanatik

xwordfanatik

2 minutes ago, suomi said:

Maybe. Could be. But I suspect that Kody had 20 or however many years of missionary and then Robyn introduced him to other delights.

He floated 10 feet off the ground around her. Going against all previous  history and behavior, he chose her wedding dress. Christine gave us a Real Housewives moment when she walked away from the talking head couch over that, on camera. Robyn got a, what, 10-day honeymoon. If he could have, he would have phoned in appearing at Truely's birth. He was all dialed in to the care and feeding of Sol and Areola and sloughed off Truely when the wives went out of town.

I think every bit of that spells pussy-whipped. 

THIS!  Kootie was completely besotted by Robo, with her VS lingerie.  She bewitched him, and from then on, the other wives truly did get "crumbs."

That preview where Kootie says Robyn is getting "crumbs."  GTFOOH.  Total crap.

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Kyanight

Kyanight

1 hour ago, xwordfanatik said:

THIS!  Kootie was completely besotted by Robo, with her VS lingerie.  She bewitched him, and from then on, the other wives truly did get "crumbs."

That preview where Kootie says Robyn is getting "crumbs."  GTFOOH.  Total crap.

OMG  - XWORD - I agreed with your post and then I REALLY noticed THIS -  if I could just add the word "and" to your post....

THIS!  Kootie was completely besotted by Robo, with her VS lingerie.  She bewitched him, and from then on, the other wives AND truly did get "crumbs."   I don't think he even noticed her at birth.  Of course the other kids got crumbs too, but this just stuck out to me.  ha ha

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Elbow

Elbow

(edited)

Maybe I'm too cynical, but, considering the age gap between Truely and her next oldest siblings and that it was Christine who first proposed and cheerled the idea of doing the show, I think Truely was conceived with the motivation of her birth being a lure for producers. When that proved to not be a big enough draw, I think they moved on to finding wife #4. Everyone in their community probably knew that they were in negotiations because of Kody's bragging and I think that's when Robyn decided to emotionally seduce Meri and wedge herself into the New Wife slot.

Edited by Elbow
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the-grey-lady

the-grey-lady

Hot damn, that was painful.

Spoiler

I’m sorry for the lateness of this recap, but in my defense, I had to watch last week’s episode first, and…well, have you seen how boring these people are? It’s a wonder I didn’t have to gnaw my own arm off to get away.

 

Previously on “Sister” “Wives”…Kody ruined Christmas with his never-going-to-happen “we should all live in one house idea.” Less than content with destroying the fambly holiday, Kody brings up the idea again in his typically modest, unassuming style. Meanwhile, the “wives” complained about having to see Kody so much as acknowledge the existence of the other “wives”…or, you know, polygamy. Meri wore a parade of increasingly hideous, hilariously small jackets.

 

Oh god, Robyn is going to cry during this episode. Do I really have to do this? Can’t I play Sudoku instead? Pleeeeeease? Fine, fine. I’ll suffer for my art.

 

And here we go. Meri has invited the other “wives” over, and she and Robyn are going to make dream boards. Snork. Meri is actually interacting with the fam, undoubtedly due to the snarking of various message board posters, myself included. So anyway, Robyn loves vision boards, ‘cause she’s made them before and her visions always come true, like becoming a plural wife. Christine believes in vision boards religiously, and I’m temporarily relieved that she believes in something religiously. Janelle is…there. She doesn’t give a shit about vision boards, or about anything, really. So, the usual. Seriously, she must’ve used up the energy from the morning sludge shake on the drive over.

 

Christine doesn’t want to live in one house. Remember that now, because she’s not going to say it again.

 

Cue lameo flashbacks of the fambly in Lehi, which was apparently the greatest way to live ever, even though everyone was miserable and jealous all the damn time. The wives debate the one home idea, and I’m not sure why the entire discussion doesn’t end immediately when Christine says she isn’t interested. So they keep debating the idea. At some point, I fall into a coma and have to be revived by a group of hot paramedics. So there’s that.

 

Robyn thought she’d have another baby, but now…she probably won’t? She doesn’t say for sure.

 

JANELLE TALKS ABOUT THEIR RELIGION. HOLY SHIT. Their views on children involve predestination, or the idea that their kids were “meant” to come to them. Which means that Meri pissed someone off big time, and Robyn may or may not be ignoring a spirit destined for her fambly.

 

Christine is all, “I only have one opinion! That doesn’t mean the giant monstrosity won’t happen!” conveniently ignoring the fact that every “wife” in one house won’t happen without her because she is ONE OF SAID “WIVES.”

 

Remember how Meri and Janelle hate each other? Yeah, that’s still a thing. Maybe they should paint cans to strengthen the bond they don’t have. Janelle points out that being a fambly means…you know, acting like a fambly.

 

Blah blah more one house talk blah blah we all know this isn’t going to happen blah blah remember how great it was when we were all up in each other’s biz all the damn time blah blah it was not fucking great blah blah

 

Janelle comes a hair’s breath away from admitting that building a huge house is a bad idea because there so close to not needing all that space as their kids get older and move out, but TLC interrupts this refreshing dose of sanity with a talking head by Robyn, who bemoans how much easier her “sister” “wives” have it because their kids are no longer little. So basically, Robyn complains about a) her own choices, and b) the nature of biology. Cool.

 

The “wives” are suspicious about the idea that Kody is talking to the other “wives.” Such a healthy dynamic here. Nothing to see here.

 

Things are really haaaaaard for Kody, guys. He has so much to doooooooo. He’s so put upooooon. He neeeeeeeds his very own space. Won’t someone save Kody from the consequences of his own actions?! This is what the “wives” spend their ultra-depressing get-together discussing: the many woes of Kody Brown and how sorry for him they feel. Puke.

 

Janelle is moving again, and she’s gonna be closer to the fambly. We suffer through a giggly, barely-decipherable moving montage, but there’s no commentary on Kody’s ass, thank the maker for that. Kody’s hair makes him look like some kind of Geico caveman dressed as Shirley Temple. What is seen cannot be unseen.

 

Kody seems to think that his desires equal reality. Like, if he wants his houses in Vegas to sell, then that’ll happen. He is absolutely gobsmacked to realize that there is not, in fact, some Plyg Genie ready to grant all his wishes. Speaking of wishes, Kody wants answers on the one house idea, and he wants them now. Well, really – he wants to hear the answer he wants, which isn’t going to happen.

 

But before we can effectively kill Kody’s ill-advised dream, we have to listen to the wives prattle on about inheritance, and then they apologize to Kody about having fucking feelings. Snooze. Meri doesn’t want to live in one house because Kody doesn’t want anything to do with her, and it’s easier to pretend things are okay between them if they live separately. Kody blames Christine for torpedoing his shitty idea, and then he whines about how he’s so irresistible which means that the wives simply cannot handle their own jealousy.

 

Did you know that it’s technically illegal to marry more than one woman? Well, it is, and Robyn is here to explain it to you. She just haaaates being the only legal wife. It’s just aaaaawful.

Robyn remembers the halcyon days of the cuddle-sac in Vegas. She cries, snotty nose, eye boogers, and all. Janelle lectures the viewing audience on how the fambly was closer in Utah, when they all lived together, because they had to work out their crap. Like, you know, Meri and Janelle’s antipathy. They totally worked that out decades ago.

 

Kody wants to know why his fambly doesn’t have the functionality to live in one home. I’m off to draft a treatise about his dysfunctional fambly. Meanwhile, Kody is preparing yet another godawful PowerPoint presentation. This isn’t over, folks. Batten down the hatches. A storm is brewing.

 

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Teafortwo

Teafortwo

On 2/21/2020 at 1:33 AM, the-grey-lady said:

I’m sorry for the lateness of this recap, but in my defense, I had to watch last week’s episode first, and…well, have you seen how boring these people are? It’s a wonder I didn’t have to gnaw my own arm off to get away.

Loved the whole recap! Funny and spot on. Definitely worth the wait and the read. Hope your arm is healing...

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Kohola3

Kohola3

19 minutes ago, LilWharveyGal said:

I sense that we're losing steam.

I fear that no one can stomach these fools long enough to get into the details.  I have to even turn off the commercials my disgust runs so deeply.

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laurakaye

laurakaye

Hot damn, I just got back from vacation and watched episode 9.  I fill like maybe...perhaps...we are getting the smallest peek behind the curtain, finally.  I volunteer as tribute to take on episode 10!

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Sandy W

Sandy W

5 minutes ago, laurakaye said:

Hot damn, I just got back from vacation and watched episode 9.  I fill like maybe...perhaps...we are getting the smallest peek behind the curtain, finally.  I volunteer as tribute to take on episode 10!

Janelle has been breaking down the "4th wall".  First she lets it be known that Robyn is up late and languishes in bed til noon, then she reveals that Meri was inhospitable to the kids when in Lehi.

You GO girl, maybe you will even have some success in breaking through Meri's fortress-like walls.

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xwordfanatik

xwordfanatik

I want to see Robyn get a comedown with Kootie going for a younger woman.  I know there are women out there that would famewhore like crazy to get on any TV show, no matter how crappy.  

Can't wait for the next snarky recap.  @laurakaye, you & others here have written some doozies!

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AZChristian

AZChristian

22 minutes ago, xwordfanatik said:

I want to see Robyn get a comedown with Kootie going for a younger woman.  I know there are women out there that would famewhore like crazy to get on any TV show, no matter how crappy.  

Well, on "Alaskan Bush People," a young lady hung out with "Bear" - a son of adult age who still loves running through the bush and acting "exxxxtreme."  She got pregnant, they announced their engagement, they broke up, they got back together, and now she has a restraining order out on him - and she hasn't even had the baby yet!

Another poor, abused woman in need of having "SuperKody" come to the rescue.  If she'd get engaged to Bear, even Kody would be a step up.

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xwordfanatik

xwordfanatik

I've never watched ABP, but I've always said that Janelle must have had a complete crappy first marriage with Meri's bro, if Kootie looked irresistible to her.  

Never, would I ever, had gone after Mr. Xword's two brothers if I had wanted to get a new guy.  Janelle attended Meri and Kootie's wedding, so was she already married to Meri's bro?  And then got the hots for Kootie?  Hmmm.

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b2H

b2H

So I thought it ironic that what should've been the tell-all was postponed for the show about drag queens dressing women properly.  What a swing in the demographics!

I didn't watch the new show, but I was wondering if TLC was going to waste our time this season with a tell-all.  They didn't even have enough of a story line to constitute a season, let alone take up the traditional three hours for a tell-all.

At some point, they just need to pull the plug on this - there's no there there.

 

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Kyanight

Kyanight

(edited)
1 hour ago, b2H said:

So I thought it ironic that what should've been the tell-all was postponed for the show about drag queens dressing women properly.  What a swing in the demographics!

Yeah.  Way off topic (but at least we are talking about TLC here?) ....  this show looks like a "drag" with queens.  Dressing up some women who then say "I'M FANTASTIC!" seems like a huge snoozefest.   We've seen Jazz say how wonderful she is and Whitney says it and I say "meh".  I don't think the women look all that incredible after their queenly make-over.  And I used to like Ru Paul's show, so it's nothing against the queens.  The premise just seems lame for a series.

Edited by Kyanight
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laurakaye

laurakaye

Oh gosh, I'm not in charge of anything, I just shoved my way to the front and grabbed the first recap, LOL.  And after last night's snoozefest, the next one can surely be yours!  They can ONLY get more interesting! 

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