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Lantern7

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Everything posted by Lantern7

  1. You gotta love how Johnny will blame Wes for anything and everything. Wes is gone. There is no more "Wes Alliance." The people that he aligned with would still be dangerous, but Johnny goes way the fuck too far. And if Laurel had won, we would have gotten ten straight minutes from him about how Natalie is a shit competitor. If he doesn't like you and he sees a wound, he grabs the biggest salt shaker he can find. And that's a huge reason why I love it when he gets fucked over. Kam going on about how she plays hard and winds when her butt is on the line . . . no. Just . . . no. I don't outright hate Kam, but she's nowhere near Laurel's league as a competitor. I'm rooting for Johnny facing Josh in the Proving Ground next week. We can call it the Butthurt Bowl. Seriously, at least Johnny has charisma. Josh is just . . . bleh. Nope, she's the Killbot. She's a relentless killing machine, and her two losses in elimination games come with footnotes (Lost to Camila because she was hurt and decided not to risk her health in a final mission; lost to Natalie under really bizarre circumstances) Yeah, Ashley had points . . . but she tried to feed Cara Maria to Natalie, so fuck her. And maybe Georgia was banking on a threesome with herself, Laurel and Bear? The mere thought is even more nauseating than Abram/Rachel/Veronica. She got lucky in both of her wins. And she was brought in midway through Final Reckoning. Not enough asterisks to slap on her for that. Turbo. He had the sweet dive into the pool to start the cold open. And I'm sure there are a few UK people that aren't assholes. Maybe Idris?
  2. Thanks! I feel like I got a grip on the “characters,” and Bear feels too easy to channel. Ditto Turbo; all you have to do is have him say stuff with broken English. Occasionally, end a line with “If he dies, he dies.”
  3. Blech. Hey, why not bring back ALL of the lame shows and movies? Invite Josh Brolin as the Jonah Hex wants to talk about! Or Birds of Prey! Aside from Barbara Gordon and Sloan Peterson as Dr. Quinzel, it was just a big pile of mediocre. Could there be maybe one Easter Egg for Gotham? I liked that series, as fucked up as it was.
  4. Yesterday, I banged my head on a curb, and I had to go to the emergency room. Bad news: while I got four staples in my head, my foot got worse and worse from when I twisted it. Good news: it feels better this morning. Also, I could watch this episode “live.” That was almost in the “bad news” column. I think it’s safe to say this season is karma balancing the scales for how good WotW1 was. Just ninety straight minutes of clusterfuckery with a happy ending based on a technicality. Of course, since it meant Laurel was sent packing, I will gladly take it. I think Laurel is probably a nice person . . . but competition turns her into Killbot, and last night did not flatter her. She sabotaged Cara Maria, acted the bitch through most of the episode, and wound being a sore winner and sore loser. Even if most of the chaos can be blamed on Teege for blowing the horn, Laurel still sucked. She did everything short of crapping on Natalie . . . sadly, a good chunk of the cast seems to want to do that to her. I get the hate for Natalie. I don’t think she needs the “Ninja” nickname, because she’s the only Natalie there. But like Nicole before her, I don’t get THE HATE. She was basically fucked over by the bulk of her team, so her win was sweet vindication. And when her teammates smart off about her in interviews, they tend to be extra nasty. She got lucky last night, but I’m proud of her. And if she punches Johnny in the face a few dozen times? Well, I don’t see how that’s a bad thing. Honestly, so many people needed a slap. The mission only really worked on paper, not taking into account either team throwing it. Johnny was basically as insufferable as Abram boning Katie in The Inferno (a level I did not think to be reachable). I found myself on the same side as Paulie and Ashley (USAshley?), but that felt wrong because they were still being assholes. The UK team couldn’t pick a “voice” off the bat, and that made TJ upset. Why should this be a team-based season? Have everyone rip off their jerseys and just brawl, because that’s what might happen anyway. The sad thing? Survivor has its sseason premiere next week, but it’s going to run ninety minutes, and I just might miss the last half-hour for this massive trainwreck of a show.
  5. TWO seasons ordered by HBO Max; scheduled to start airing in Fall 2020. I'm guessing Aaron REALLY wants to make up for THAT season. He could also be more inspired by current events, but it's would basically be shooting fish in a barrel.
  6. Here's the Death Battle preview profile of Sasuke: And here's a similar profile on Hiei.
  7. Then may God have mercy on Georgia's soul. My thing is that Bear would probably only know Laurel through TV. "Oi! I'm the Bear! This Bear is gonna be mating, and it's gonna be BEARLY LEGAL!! And she was interested in females . . . emphasis on 'was'!! I guess that makes me the ultimate man 'round here . . . as that wanker Wes discovered!!! Who wants to see the fresh ink on me scrote?!?"
  8. Top 10 list of epic failures on The Challenge. The top spot makes me smile, because it's richly deserved
  9. Yes, but do you at least concede that she was stunning? And brave? #IHadTo #BuckleUpBuckeroo I had some laughs . . . though I'd probably have to watch again to remember the exact lines. Blake Griffin saying no one in Caitlyn Jenner's family liked white dick . . . that was a keeper. Even if he was fed that joke, it was still funny. Triumph the Insult Comic Dog is a double-edged sword. The gag goes way too far, but he's so funny. #ForMeToPoopOn
  10. Check your local library system. You can find graphic novels there if you’re fortunate, and maybe they’d have some old-school Preacher.
  11. From the episode 408 thread: I don't think Garth Ennis was daring a divine power to lightning bolt his keister when he was writing Preacher. Ennis is best known for "taking the piss" on stuff, and I'm guessing religion was one of those (superheroes being another, as seen on The Boys). He is an excellent writer, and he's penned great stuff that doesn't have the shock value of his better-known works. Check out the Battlefields comics he wrote. There is some blood and guts, to be sure (the stories are set in the thick of WWII), but I think his writing shines through. I've been reading Preacher via Comixology. I understand that a lot of the stuff that was adapted for TV had to be crammed in that. But I kinda wanted Herr Starr's ordeal with the cannibals in full. Not only does he lose a leg, he has to wipe the dimmest cannibal's ass in order to get a gun. He kills all three, only they land on top of him. And there are nine panels of him hoping through the desert, falling down and yelling "FUCK!" It's beautiful in its own way.
  12. Heads up: Adult Swim will be easing us into the new season with an airing of The Walking Dead special this Sunday.
  13. In regard to Daniel Gil potentially turning invisible . . . y'all kidding, right? Geoff ran the year after completing the course, but I reckon he said something about spending time with his family. If he had kept competing, he wouldn't have been treated as an afterthought. Anyone surprised we got Geoff's climb, and Akbar wasn't dubbed in, shouting "BRITTEN'S GOT TALENT!!!!!"? He lived to do that, man.
  14. Geez, Lou Dobbs. What does the president’s throat taste like? And did American Pharaoh taste the same thing when he chomped on Pence? Wait, don’t answer either question. if Justice Sotomayor couldn’t answer Supreme Court cases with Trevor, then I guess he kept RBG queries in his pocket. “Is it true she once deadlifted three justices at once? And we’re you one of them? There’s a small betting pool with me and the correspondents.”
  15. Drew's kid six years from now: "Seriously, why is my middle name 'Akbar'?" "Well, Matt . . . "
  16. "Who is the greatest warrior? Is it the Ninja Warrior, or is it the Titan?" Tiny voice: "What about the Spartan?" "NOBODY IS TALKING TO YOU! YOU DON'T MATTER!!!" The future? Well, I know we've seen headliners continue being headliners while raising babies. That said, I'd understand if Drew takes a break. On the other hand, he did have to use a Safety Pass, and that might be motivation to stay in the game. Daniel is staying on.
  17. Daniel isn't fast enough. Drew Drechel is your American Ninja Warrior. And a good chunk of that $1million had better go to support that kid. 😄
  18. They set up the buzzer right at the end. No repeat of Makoto Nagano swiping at the buzzer a fraction of a second too late. I never learned how to climb a rope. I am ashamed.
  19. For anyone griping over the last ninjas standing . . . can you at least stay in the same room with either of them? I think I set a record for the use of the word "fuck" posting about the latest episode of The Challenge. I'm just saying . . .
  20. Stripping? Daniel Gil clears Stage Three, forces a showdown with Drew Dreschel. Who ya got winning it all?
  21. Adam Rayl falls sadly on Cane Lane. I feel bad for his mother. She looked like she was two seconds from a heart attack. ETA: The anticipation for Daniel Gil just knocked Josh Salinas into the water on the first obstacle. Damn.
  22. Karson Voiles gets WWWA on Cane Lane. Three left. Realization: between ANW and The Voice, maybe the NBC peacock should be sitting on a buzzer.
  23. THE KID IS DOWN! And on Ultimate Cliffhanger, way earlier than I would have figured. Five left. *sigh* Stop hyping Dwayne, Matt. Seriously.
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