KerleyQ

Guys. I'm scared. Someone replied with "We need more Franco!" How? Why? What? I need to go lie down.

I'm all for one last OLTL pick up - Chandelier. Chandy can take out Kiki and Franco.

At this point, I'm honestly good with like one episode that has a lot of just full screen explanations, interspersed with a few scenes of key moments. Like a a few scenes of text explaining how Jason found out who he is, along with quick clips of him talking to people like Sam and Monica for the first time (as Jason), a screen or two explaining that the Q's exposed Nik and got back ELQ, with a scene of Michael and Tracy settling back in to their offices and Nik storming out of a courtroom. Obviously we'd need some explanation that Anna found Robin, along with a scene of her rescuing her. And then start the next episode with some new story lines. Some would build off what was just wrapped up - like Jason re-entering life and whether he's Jason Q, Jason Morgan, or some new hybrid. Personally, I'd start him off as being repulsed by his hit man past and trying to help Anna bring down the mob. I know it would seem kind of cheap and lazy, but I feel like sometimes things get so bad that you just need to wipe the slate clean and move on. Don't spend too much time trying to wrap up the crap Ron left you, just move along and do something that viewers will actually tune in for regularly.

I think it was a little bit of all of that.

I'm wondering if that letter is what takes Laura off screen for the month Genie is going to be gone.

I can't help but think that the ridiculous vague promos are part of Ron's wanting every single thing to be a "big surprise!" But there has to be a happy medium between every single thing being a surprise and spoiling everything. You can promo that Lucy's daughter is returning while keeping secret the circumstances of her return. If there's some big surprise coming in the immediate future that they wanted to keep spoiled, they could have played that surprise out today. Or play it out tomorrow, with a decent enough lead in to it at the end of today's episode or in the "on the next General Hospital" previews at the end. A non-spoiled surprise isn't worth shit if nobody is watching when it happens on screen.

We don't know what you do in your free time.

If we don't get Joss in full "you're not my father!" glory to Sonny after the wedding, I'm going to be pissed. Seeing Jax's daughter cozy up to Sonny would make too gross for words. I need her, at some point, and her teens would be a good time, to find out all the shit Sonny's pulled on her father over the years, including trying to kill him and being instrumental in keeping her away from him, and just lose her shit on him. And on her mother for marrying the moobster who tried to kill her father.

If we can just get a nice "rock to the head" or "busted for all of her lies at her own wedding" moment for Carly like twice a year or so, I'd be good.

I just want to know when Ron's going to return to Twitter. I'm so disappointed that we're not even getting passive-aggressive internet meme tweets from him.

I won't lie, I spent most of today's episode hoping that, as the memorial ended, we'd get a shot of her body lying somewhere and her eyes jolting open right as the scene faded to black.

You fire Ron, and the gloves come off at Soaps In Depth:

And the way they faded out of that scene after they introduced themselves to each other. I was thinking "is this supposed to be some big dramatic moment? Like we've all been waiting with bated breath for the meeting of Morgan and Dillon?"

Oh, Dillon, don't ask Morgan to read.

I spent that whole montage of speakers in fear that they would. I was so relieved when it didn't happen.

Yes, it was definitely season 1. Riley was noticeably younger looking than she has been in the S2 episodes, as was Auggie. Add in the season 1 opening credits, and it was pretty clearly taped then. I wonder if the whole theme weekend was supposed to happen earlier than it did, because otherwise, it makes little sense for them to have taped this last season for airing after several S2 episodes have already aired. (Of course, I also think it's odd that the mystery episode of Jessie is apparently the series finale. So the timing of the theme weekend already seemed off to me.)

Yep. I started feeling somewhat misty when Oliver tried to talk and just turned his head and cried, and then Thorne got up there, and I was a mess. It's criminal that they're just going to throw Thorne back in the basement after they get done gutting him by killing off his only child. If he had said what he said in a smaller scene with, say, Rick, Maya, Steffy, Ivy, Liam, Caroline, and Eric, outside of the memorial itself, it wouldn't have been so bad, because I do assume that what you're saying was the point - he feels guilty. Maybe his guilt stems from the fact that they all should have known something was up, but they were all so busy fighting over FC that nobody bothered to pay attention to how much the bullshit that went down affected Ally's state of mind. They let their business machinations negatively affect a mentally unhealthy young woman who is a part of their family, and nobody noticed exactly how affected she was until it was too late. Now, I know the start of the damage to Ally came from the bullshit Rick and Maya pulled on her, but everyone else failed to think beyond "Rick and Maya were behaving like assholes and their behavior towards Ally is one example" to realize how much that behavior had affected Ally. To the Ridge/Liam/Steffy side of the equation, she was just one more example of how shitty Rick had behaved to use as justification for a takeover instead of their niece/friend/cousin who was hurting and needed their love, support, and help. Maybe if every character, except, what, 3 or 4, wasn't either a Forrester or a Spencer, we wouldn't have to fear that Thomas being back can only mean that he's going to try to sex up his father's girlfriend. There are literally no age appropriate women on this show who aren't related to him or involved with one of his relatives. I know a half hour show needs to have a leaner cast than an hour soap, but come on, Bell, throw in some women in that age group who aren't part of what are apparently the only two families in all of L.A.

I so wanted this. Right around the time he showed up, there was a spoiler out there about there being an unknown Q hitting town. It would have been easy enough to retcon him as a Q - say Allison was really Alan's daughter, from an affair her mother had with him while married to Amanda Barrington's son. Rafe could have been tied into the Q's, he would have been involved in the ELQ stock story at the time. Instead we got whatever the hell that Rafe story was. As usual, it came across like Ron had a new shiny toy for a while, and then he got bored and threw it in the garbage as soon as someone dangled something else shiny in his face.

This would be easy enough to write, too. Just have Sonny get in some turf war or a battle with Ava, where Avery isn't necessarily hurt at all in a confrontation, but it scares Michael enough that he gets her back. (And if they want to redeem Sonny some, have him decide not to fight it after some soul searching, realizing that he has put his kids in danger too many times and can't protect them as long as they're a part of his life.) As for Liz/Patrick..part of me would be into it, because the two of them have good chemistry and I feel like Patrick might be back to his old self (or at least close to it) with Liz. But, part of me doesn't want to ruin the Patrick/Liz friendship, which I love.

This. That has always bothered me, and is just one of the many examples of how petty and immature Ron could behave. He took some internet comments about how the old Joss actress looked like one of the children of the corn, and he turned it into a running joke with the new actress - a joke at the expense of a little girl. It's just as bad, if not worse, than the "AJ is fat!" jokes at SK's expense. (I say "if not worse" because SK, at least, is an adult. What Ron was doing to him was gross, absolutely, but I feel like it becomes extra gross when you're talking about a grown man writing jokes about the appearance of a young girl.)

I think Nik needs to be raked over the coals a lot more than Liz. Liz is doing this one thing, and it's most likely going to be explained as some kind of mental/emotional breakdown in response to things like Jake's "death." Nik is, so far as we've been shown, just being a selfish, greedy bastard. And he's actually orchestrated a lot of shit, like the takeover of ELQ, where Liz basically had her lie fall into her lap. I don't actually expect Nik to get more shit than Liz (or even as much), because that's not how this show rolls, but I'm going to be pissed when it ends up that he basically gets a "tsk tsk, you naughty boy!" while Liz spends a while having people screaming "Lying Whore!!!" as she walks down the street.

Or "until the world's least accurate hitman tries to take a shot at you and hits me by mistake."

Was it Pratt Falls? https://www.youtube.com/user/grrarrgghh/videos?view=0&sort=dd&shelf_id=1

The only thing I can think of is that she was going to try to film the confrontation to use to show Thorne and/or Aly's therapist to show how out of control she's gotten. But she ended up getting a lot more than she bargained for. I know I should be all "it was self-defense, she's innocent!" But, I hope that Steffy gets her FUN!! ass busted for this. She lied to the police and she threw the weapon away. When the only hardcore evidence they have is what's on Ivy's phone (if she turns it in), Steffy will have lost all credibility to make her self-defense claim believable.

Time to go head over to Costco and buy a vat of brain bleach. When I think of the "God, who's next??" possibilities in Ron's current apparent fascination of mother/daughter triangles, each possible set makes me progressively more grossed out. I won't even name any of them, for fear of putting it out into the universe.