Midnight Cheese

I totally didn't know Jesus Christ had an addiction to Cache dresses, poorly applied eyeliner, Restylane, Chanel jewelry and tender sexytimes with toofless Mississippians! Wait, does Vicki mean she's dying for our collective sins pretty soon? It's already October and everything. I hope the Reunion includes Tamrat and Truffle Hunter doing some kind of a spiritual together. It could be gospel, it could be a cover of a Carter family song, it could be one of the Spanish numbers I heard during my childhood Sundays at Catholic mass. I ain't picky. (Hey, just like Vicki! A bit of discernment about which gentlemen should and should not be granted passage into her 'perfect, 2 C-sections!!' vagine would've kept her Brooks-free.)

I am still watching lots of old episodes on Hulu - sick at home with my kiddo. I would love to see the following racers again, either because I loved watching them, or because I think they would be incredible with a second crack at things: - Kevin and Drew - Danny and Oswald - Ken and Gerard - Bowling Moms - Lena and Kristy - JVJ - Wanda and Desiree - Nat and Kat - Chip and Kim (I'd love to see her attack a bunch of Roadblocks!) - Kris and Jon - Tammy and Victor - Justin and Zev - the Gaghans from TAR: Family Edition, especially Tammy and Carissa - Kisha and Jen My least favorite teams ever were both from season 9 -- while s. 6's Jonathan and Victoria and Freddy and Kkkendra suck in all of the obvious ways, I absolutely loathe BJ & Tyler and Fran & Barry, and I also think Cindy in particular of Ernie and Cindy (TAR 19) is a nasty piece of work. They are each shitbags. Fly-attracting sacks of excrement. Arrogant and not that special and hardly intellectual powerhouses. Haaaaaate 4eva. What I think is so funny about BJ, Tyler and Cindy in particular, is that they held themselves out as being particularly smart/studious/brilliant when we have Tammy, Victor, Nat and Kat in the winner's circle (and Amy and Maya too -- and I like them so much, too) -- each of whom has considerably more impressive professional credentials and schooling if you count that stuff as important -- and BJ/Cindy/Tyler CLEARLY did. And Nat/Kat/Tammy/Victor each had more genuine personalities and more obvious decency than chucklefucks BJ, Tyler and Cindy. Shouldn't your most significant intellectual accomplishment be something besides "my treacly video application almost but didn't get me into Stanford?" #justsaying I feel genuine pity for any romantic partner of the Hippies, who bring fakeness to a scary place. BJ in particular has an obvious core of anger, and I'm convinced not a little misogyny animating him, and nope, not kidding. **Especially if you look back at season 9 -- both Hippie motherfuckers were very, VERY deliberately grabby with Monica (Joseph/Monica - they fought a fair amount, and Monica was a very pretty blonde) after doing a messy fish-based Detour. The "Frat Boys" - whose idiot moniker comes courtesy of brain trust BJ & Tyler, even though Eric/Jeremy met at community college, and never referenced actually being in a place with actual fraternities - never did that. They might have been a little smarmy, but isn't that better than being arrogant, mocking and fucking handsy? There is almost nothing worse than a not-that-smart man who thinks he's an intellectual, and who feels like after his more awkward teen years, women should be all into his nonsense now.

I am so horrified and sickened by this story. I have been binge-watching old seasons on Hulu and I loved Hera and Gus (Hera in particular) during the original airing and it only increased. She is a beautiful, compassionate, intelligent, gracious woman, and I can't believe this, and that she had her son taken from her. I want to cry reading this. Hera also has a blog, which I found by Googling just now. She had a little girl a year after losing her son: http://cappuccinoqueen.com/?p=990

It's all been said and said better by you all. All I can conclude is: - Vicki's payoff for IMO being in with Brooks in faking a current NHL diagnosis is to try and gain pity - as much a lure for her as Rolexes and facial fillers and oversizsed implants and tequila - and some strange retroactive support for ever taking up with Crooks. She has been outed as unfaithful with him, as springing for her own gifts from him, as supporting him and as supporting him against a couple of admittedly selfish family members. Vicki is one dumb fuck but she craves being thought of as worldly and smart, and being taken for a fool burns her up. She wanted Tammy Sue in particular to feel shame (like that slag can feel anything) for being so critical (or 'observant'). - David is checkitty checked out of the marriage. Put a fork in it. After hysterical bonding and the kids, there is not much else between them. It's actually very sad. I wonder what Shannon sees watching this. - Meghan PI's Previously.TV nickname is giving me life.

I have, Talula, along with the comments that criticizing Shannon is somehow 'victim blaming' the casualty of David's deliberately, clearly premeditated decision to step out while filming was going on with someone they knew. When I type it out like that Josh Douchebag Fedora Taekman somehow seems the less awful husband. How's that even possible? I love your GIFs and images in your posts! You lively up the threads so much!

Dead-on, motorcitymom65. I like Shannon even though I've become very critical of this particular choice and the kinds of ramifications it has on different people. To consciously and deliberately choose to be on this show for no economic benefit to specifically 'work on the marriage' and then sign on for a second season specifically in order to document counseling, the children being aware of the degree of dysfunction - I completely, completely disagree with the idea posited that this 'teaches' children to protect the sanctity of relationships in a healthy way. (I've struck the obscenities I'd ordinarily use to describe that thought process and will be a mincing, dainty lady like Vicki and just call that excrement from a bovine creature.) The show isn't the show it's supposed to be, meaning, the 'behind the gates/a look into privilege' is not the actual conceit, and really hasn't been even on RHOBH, where Maloof and Vanderpump and Grammar showed off houses on or above Shannon's level. It's all about caterwauling maniacs and selling stuff, and it has been for years and seasons and seasons. Even those Housewives were trying to do something - resurrect acting careers, sell houses. Kristen (ugh I hate Josh. And I hate David a hell of a lot) was trying to restart a career as an older model, and has marketed an actual, sold-in-stores product. Even if it seems nuts I really see her behavior - whatever she chooses to do in the wake of idiot Josh's idiot scandal - as being one of trying to secure a future after a SAH spell. I don't think Shannon's behavior has any justification and I think it's bewildering to think that maybe she shouldn't grip to this storyline so desperately because she's got a house full of tweens is somehow blaming Shannon for the affair or victim-blaming. That's completely ridiculous. I think Shannon is wrong for doing this and putting her children in a terrible position they absolutely don't need to be in, with the ins and outs of their parents' marriage so terribly exposed. It's manipulative and just damned wrong to me. I do wonder what will happen to the Beador marriage. I think people can come back from most anything but WTFWTFWTF to telling your wife you had sex with your girlfriend on not just her birthday but a major, milestone birthday. WTFWTF. No.

I love you! You KNOW she would. 'I work hard, I work work work work, I work more than you and more than anyone, so of course work makes me free to play hard in Havasu and at Andale's! Ew, what? [waving hands in the delusional way she thinks is girlish, taking mincing steps like a footed ham], I don't even like Nazis!' It's insanity squared that anyone thinks they're entitled to medical records or proof about anyone's health but their own or that of their minor child or ward. But! I agree with WireWrap above and others...I think the queen of multi-level marketing insurance scams and her toofless man and fan of Hallmark-approved aphorisms are stupid fucking liars. Originally I would've credited Crooks with a better con but I think he got lazy and thinks everyone is as slack-jawed durrr as he and Truffle Hunter. I may not adore Heather, but honestly, I would trust her judgment in this instance. Not suggesting that Heather knows a truth no one else knows, but if she thinks there's some hinky bullshit going on, there is. And sorry-not-sorry, "I was on my way to meet your recommended oncologist but got flat tires on the drive in" is beyond mortifying as an obvious lie. Just tell Mommy Shannon that it was your friend's cigarette next time, Crooks. He got lazy, and Vicki is hella dumb is my theory on this one. None of that makes Meghan's crusade **at all** okay. She is embarrassing as all hell.

I agree with this so much. I write with no snark that maybe this is where Shannon not I guess working, having to work, has impacted how she reasons things through - if she in fact thinks anything like, 'Well, the show is my job and I can use my job to help other hurting women,' that seems beyond bananas to me and I don't think that's victim blaming. Shannon knows she's neurotic; she is suffering, but she's self-aware and she's also the mom to 3 kids who deserve to not have this splashed everywhere. This whole story, scenario, fallout is fucking creepy. RHOOC brings the creepy -- very much in line with Jay Photoglou and Tamra's pursuit of Ho Justice with Gretchen, and a lot of that pointless shit started with OC-based blogs. Ka-reepy.

Jesus H. I don't think the Giudices deserved legal protection because they had children: I didn't think it was necessary for frothing stans to find out the identity of the woman on the phone with Joe during that scene, and that certainly happened. I don't think it's 'giving the affair a break' for the anonymous person or persons to have refrained from dropping her name around the net following Tamra's lead, and for that to hit the fan in an international tabloid. People want blood and feel satisfaction over this. I think it's gross. And Shannon and David agreed to sign onto a second season despite their serious issues and their kids are talking about it like they themselves are marriage counselors, and some adults had to be told to strike the name of the school of either the Beador or other children - that is nucking futs to me, that anyone who is old enough to vote would need to be told to maybe think that over twice. Is that too merciful or too 'on the affair's side' for ya? So be it. There are consequences to all of this kind of thing. It's not cute to have this kind of bloodlust and then pretend to care about the actual innocent parties involved. You disagree. It's not being on a shitty person's 'side' to think that, nor to question the perspective when someone, if not Shannon herself, but a 'source' is saying that she or someone is claiming they signed on again to 'help other families.' That 'help' rationale is bull, and so is all this mess.

How terrible for both families. Unpopular opinion but I feel sorry for both families, both sets of children, both betrayed spouses, and I think it's as disgusting as the fact of this thing that someone decided to post anonymously in some fucked up definition of 'justice' to out the other woman...and screw over her family in public in the process. Wow. How screwed up people are, just loving to paint that scarlet A and then smarm about how sorry they feel for the impacted family members. If you care about that, you don't follow a scumbag like Tamra's lead (after she deliberately spilled the first name on WWHL, how long do you think it took for tabloids to start working sources and vetting the story?). *Maybe* this woman did approach Shannon to pump her for info: maybe. I wouldn't take that as fact at all, and I like Shannon pretty well. But her decision to sign on for another season in the midst of this madness and to do so while putting spin that she did this to 'help other families' makes me somewhat disgusted since we've seen over the season that her children are now dancing around their parents' marital problems and are being part of this plotline. That's just wrong. It is. And now it's bigger, and that prim, 'well, she shouldn't have banged Crazy Eyes Beador!' - well, doy. But THIS is necessary? Really? This ridiculous Hester Prynning shit makes me ill. I didn't need to know about the other person on the phone during the infamous Joe Giudice in Napa scene on RHONJ, that the scene was included was bad enough and made me actually feel terrible for Tre Giudice and I loathed her. I didn't need this splashed out either, and I don't need to know who Josh 'Fedora D-bag' Taekman met, either. "They all deserve what they get, I'm so glad!" Yeah. I'm not.

Yeah, I am curious about this -- I've read the Previously threads like it's my job, and I can write that people here are super nice; we are talking about how whack Meghan is in her Pursuit of the Cancer Truth (and she is), but - does anyone else also think Brooks FKA Crooks is COMPLETELY full of shit here? I can't even believe I think he's faking a current cancer diagnosis but - eff it. I think he's faking a current cancer diagnosis, and that walking trashsack Vicki 'I'm a BUSINESS WOMAN [porcine nostrils flaring]' Gunvalson is the oozing ass pimple who encouraged him to do so. Tamra's mom seems like she should be chain-smoking on a front porch somewhere while monitoring the ins and outs of her neighbors. She creeps me the fuck on out. Every single person associated with Tamra is just awful.

I agree - I get out of the habit, and then let myself get sucked in, but it's too true. I do want glam and beauty on these silly-assed shows. Seeing cookie-cutter boring-assed small houses, miserable, small marriages between uninteresting people, hearing about relationships between nitwits, ugh. Every time I see Vicki on screen I am reminded that I meant to put down my very real but awful opinion about her loss of her mom. Of course that hurts. However. I never liked Vicki's mom. She was crass, loud, stupid, obnoxious, and raised heinous Vicki and drunkitty drunk drunk slob Billy. She was a whinemonster in Italy on that trip Vicki forced on Brianna (before Brianna decided she was also on some level a Housewife). I'm sorry she lost her but the fact that we're all mortal doesn't make me any fonder of any of Vicki's relations on this show. (I'm sorry Brooks is? was? ill. He's also slimy and pointless and stupid. Like, a completely pointless human being. It's hard to be that but he is. Like a Margaritaville tee shirt that somehow has a circulatory system and a SSN.)

I caught up on old episodes and think only that it must be hard to be Heather Dubrow (TM Shannon Beador.) This show is just the cretin's hour. It's innately uninteresting to me. Heather is a snob and sometimes disingenuous and she voluntarily has sex with Terry, but she's almost my heroine for how she gamely interacts with all of the nitwits on RHOOC without just losing it every time she has to see them, check or no check. I don't want to watch a show of this kind to try and relate to people - that's why I like RHONY, I know NYC, and I don't admire the Housewives necessarily, but some of them have style, self-control, college degrees, jobs. RHOOC has Heather - who has screwed up at moments but seems to firmly draw lines about how much of her actual emotional self she's willing to sacrifice - who had a real career, and a college degree, and self-control, and good clothes, and a gross airport hangar house-to-be. And she has to hang around with a droopy dog who found keratin, is in hucksteristic sales but pretends she's a financial advisor, who has no brains, no couth, no taste, and no ability to bring in a man she doesn't have to support financially, who has a whiny spawn with grandbabies with a psychopath. And she has to BFF it up with a complete monster who has no loyalty to even her children or husband on any level, who has a chilling lack of sincerity and education by any measure, and who lives in some tract house that looks like a Wayfair/Home Good explosion. It's befuddling, the idea that these shows, which started off with 'behind the gates' promises, are as low-rent as RHOOC. Snobbery would improve this show so much. Shannon has added less than I'd have thought with putting the infidelity front and center, and she doesn't seem any more attracted to things requiring brains than Vicki. This show is just a soul-suck of mouth-breathing trashbag racist prosperity gospel adherents who see no value in books or broader culture. I know this has always been true but when I skip for a while and then watch, it's really shocking. Excepting Heather, none of these women could begin to hang with most of the Housewives on NY, ATL or BH. They're too stupid and crass and it shows in every possible manner - the jobs and lack thereof and schooling and lack therof in the Housewives kids and consequent grandchildren beginning to roll in. No one has the inclination besides H. to do anything besides drink and lie and fuck and shop and accessorize really, really poorly. Heather's the only one who is even slightly awesome on vacation - they don't ever want to do anything in foreign countries either! She does, and she's the only one who was a true success before her marriage, and who bothered with school. Those things are connected, and it's so sad that some of the garbage people (TM Julie Klausner) will never get it. So sad. And on ATL, where most of the 'wives didn't go to college -- even though there's a currently barred lawyer in the mix -- they have something real: wit, generally, and careers with a creative bent (Kandi, Nene, Cynthia - who was big back in the day, knew/knows Leon and the sort of New Jack Swing generation of actors/musicians/models). RHOOC is just like the worst of the worst that this culture has to offer if we're not including things like hate groups monitored by the SPLC. I wish I were kidding. Some interactions could be in an Al Qaeda training video.

Ha! I just Googled Kristen and the age on the right side was 38. I would think she was like amazingly young-looking for a 44-year old pale blonde mom of 2 young kids with a shitty husband....

AnnA, I think Kristen's 38.

You're presenting it as something close to an objective, widely agreed upon reality that the article about Kristen proves she is uninteresting - as if it were like proving Ramona got foobs this past season as offensive to the eye IMO as Kristen's are to some. That is not true. That is in fact *objectively* untrue and writing for me, that is why you're getting push back. Nothing 'went to hell in a hand basket.' You read stuff into her responses that others here did not read, and then you wrote as if someone 'misread' the article, as opposed to reading it and having a different opinion. I like not agreeing with everyone but that to me is what happened.

I really agree with you, well stated. I hope she leaves him, takes the kids to Brooklyn, and makes Lucali's their go-to spot (BREAK YOUR DIET IF YOU'RE ON ONE: THEIR STUFF IS DELICIOUS. The calzone and pizza deserve all-caps.) In some ways, Kristen *really* is so freaking normal, just the pretty-model version of it. Get that pizza, lady!

How on Earth is she a hypocrite, ZM? For liking blowouts? She is probably the most stable, normal and decent person in this cast. She wasn't harsh or mean at all. I hate the eff out of how certain elements of the viewership take Kristen for something she has never shown herself to be because of her friendship with Brandi. Or Heather. Or for having married Josh. I think she is demonized in ways other people aren't: LuAnn married someone possibly anti-Semitic, but it doesn't come up again and again and again and again. Mario was an overt douche-cheat, not a secret one, but that doesn't come up ad nauseum in Ramona posts. But Kristen is held culpable for being associated with people some don't like.

The best/worst part of the episode for me was dopey, deluded Amanda saying in her fake lil' mouse voice, "I'm soo sorry, but Ashley's to me was the worst..." in that patented 'twentysomething woman thinks she's much cuter than she is' manner...as the actually chic Nina Garcia whipped her head and stared incredulously at Kelly Osborne. Amanda, let me translate: that is fashion editrix for "NOPE!" See ya Amanda! You seem to have nothing to offer literally at all in terms of design, I'm soo sorry to write. /winks cutely. I do hope Ashley toughens up but I think the comments about why she may have taken it so to heart are very insightful. I like Laurie, I like Merline and think she could have some interesting work to show. I think Joseph and Kelly have the least to offer right now - well, several others too, but I'd love Joseph and his unwarranted arrogance to get auf'ed next. Edmond's gown was kind of joyous in a weird way. I like him, and I like Swapnil, so I'm glad one of them took it home.

"Sonja is an asshole for saying anything. She doesn’t like when people speak of her personal life so therefor she shouldn’t speak of others. Kristen doesn’t deserve to be going through this and her friends shouldn’t be making it worse for her, whether or not it’s true!" "So much for Sonja doesn’t have a malicious bone in her body." It is really freaking awesome to read comments that indicate Sonja's statements and actions are actually being taken for what they are, without this B.S. presumption (that Sonja the pass-agg hooker has a) heart of gold.

Josh may be a bad-hat-wearing fuckface, but he had Sonja dead to rights. Ho is delusional. Dee-loo-sion-al. And she commented nastily to try and put herself above Kristen. It's always worth saying - to me at least! - that Sonja only to go where she is/was/will be through dick sucking and targeting old rich dudes in the same manner a pickpocket spies a mark from 20 paces, so ho can shut it now and forever; it's not like she entered *her* marriage with the expectation of fidelity or partnership, and the rumors are thicker than overcooked oatmeal that she fucked around on her Daddy Warbucks as much as he may have done the same. She's a real lump of shit when things don't go her way, and it's pretty richly amusing that this is her version of a dish best served cold for some comments about her business acumen. Those comments could not have been more accurate.

I wonder if Ramona's ever done waist/tummy lipo or that bs with lasers that Kim Zolciak did in ATL (I have no hate for Kim doing that, because wasn't she eating junk food AS she was getting lasered? Hilarious.) I swear I am not body snarking Ramona, she is incredibly fit and lucky to have very young-looking skin, but she carries any junk in her tum-tum and she's very, very vain, so I've wondered. What a shameless ho she is. "Here I am in my dress, aren't I pretty??" It didn't fucking belong to her. That's the point. I also think she's likely to get slightly competitive with Avery in terms of dress size and looks as Avery leaves girlhood behind completely. I don't think Bethenny's the only lunatic on that tip in this group - I bet Sexy J is going to have a similar issue too, especially if her finances get really tight on her again. I cannot imagine that of LuAnn or Heather, though, and doubt it of Dorinda.

Yes indeedy - it's a quick trot on the high road to go from LuAnn's unsubstantiated claim about Heather to also conclude that it's 'in the news' that LuAnn floating Aviva's old and apparently unsubstantiated claim that Radzi had a ghostwriter has legs. After all, Ramona Logic is super logical: LuAnn said it (but backed that shit up so there was no 'it' in her claim about Heather in St. Barth's), and if people (ok, not 'people' but 'person' since it's just LuAnn and she cowered from giving a single detail) are saying it, there must be something to it! That was Ramona's argument to Bethenny about the cheating thing, and while Bethenny is tiresome, I agree that it's a lethal character trait to hop on similar piles of shit and insist that there's something to every thin bit of gossip drifting around these Hos.

If I am part of the 'we,' then I disagree. I don't think we've seen or heard enough. Unlike Sonja, Kristen was a part of a launch of two separate business endeavors that actually sold things last season - the nail polish and a jewelry collaboration. She at least attempts to sell these products via the images she posts to her blogs. We know her daughter got Early Invention, got the braces off, and is now actually running around -- but we got this in half a sentence. We know her vow renewal happened and was (THANK GOODNESS) scrapped by the editors. And she participated in every real RHONY social event and was sane (um, Sonja, Ramona, Dorinda, Bethenny) and not a drunk screaming sobbing mess. I know reasonable minds can disagree but I think it's awful to be so harsh towards her when I think, at least, that we can all agree she must be terribly hurt and in shock through absolutely no fault of her own and she's never acted like she was perfect, or like women with unfaithful husbands 'earned' it -- this never happened. Never. I would argue Ramona did, with her eagerness to out the Count's affairs and LuAnn's allegedly open marriage, so she is on the Josh Duggar hypocrite spectrum as far as marital commentary goes. This isn't from you ZM but it isn't 'ironic' for her to have the friction with (stupid-assed, insane) Dorinda over the 'sandwich' and John and have Josh serially betray her with the website -- that isn't even what irony means, but whatever. And Kristen does not owe *anyone* *any* kind of public explanation for what she chooses to do/not do with respect to her marriage. She just doesn't.

Dorinda is such a mess. The thing that's creepy about her is she's trying to play all sides but is too dumb to even know how to do like a proper snake -- you can't attack Heather for (motherfucking) everything, and then have Heather say to Andy, 'look at her, she hates me!' and then look taken aback for being accused, accurately, of seeming absolutely hateful. Dorinda does seem to have a simmering bunch of anger in her over nothing. She is a craven phony kiss-up, and the friendship with Ramona now makes total sense to me. They are both jumped-up dumb-dumbs with small brains and livers that, if we imagined them as people, are old, swollen, wheezy and welcome each new gulp of alcohol with a groan of, 'fuck me!' Not getting into the sandwich debate, but Kristen was rational and handed Dorinda's ass to her, and that was good to see. Whatever, sandwich, don't sandwich, offer me a sandwich to go with my Ruffles. There is no fucking way that Kristen deserved the wrath of Miss Martini 2015 over that bunch of stupid. Dorinda, you're pissed at your boyfriend and your asshole bitch-beast 'friend,' Ramona. Talk to them, ignore Ramona because she'll just lie her tweaked-tittied self near to death. Maybe listen to John, but at least don't blame other people for your feelings, and by the way? Sonja would have fucked him in front of you and then pretended she had no agency in that, so if you're worried about someone getting fresh with your big-dicked deep pockets dude, worry about the slattern with the open robe who lies a lot, okay? More reading of Ramona please! More, more, more! talula, I wanted Bethenny to go to there: I wanted confirmation of the fact that Mario has been rumored to be cheating on Ramona for more than a decade (he was ring-off and ogling women in season 1 of RHONY), and of the shady shit that I know Ramona herself did against Jill, Alex and other Housewives of Olde. She is a liar and a nasty fucking thief and trust me, in other circumstances, those dresses matter, a lot. Law school clinics at the best schools across the country have students train with practicing lawyers to free up people who really did accidentally walk out of Marshall's with a bra that got mixed in with the stuff they paid for, so they find themselves facing a shoplifting charge. Ramona and Sonja's heinous 'friendship' busted up over Ramona yanking a dress from Sonja. She steals from whomever she pleases, obviously. She has no shame and no decency. Let her get some sliver of what she deserves. She wouldn't even write a fucking check to Dress for Success to help women who face real problems, not made up 'my childhood! The woods remind me of my childhood!' problems. She is a garbage person, and fuck her forever. (But Mario won't! /sad horns of poor, poor Ramona).