CletusMusashi

Dude, you already have a special place! It's called a nice house with no zombies and shit! What's Alpha gonna do, hang an "Employee of the Month" sign on a tree somewhere?

This is currently on holiday clearance markdown at Kult of Athena, so I'm about fifty fifty on whether or not I'm going to buy one. On the one hand, it looks to be a decent semi-historical killy-toy. And I don't actually have any old-style polearms that I'm truly happy with. On the other hand, I have been spending way too much money and space on such things. This year alone I have purchased one shield, two daggers, and nine swords. Usually I keep the total under half a dozen, and that's still kind of ridiculous. But on the third hand, if I do buy this thing, I'm pretty sure it will be my true "In Case of Zombie Emergency, Grab This" weapon. It's long enough to have reach when you want it to, but short enough to use indoors or outdoors. It's a size that can double as a walking stick or even an aid for climbing over obstacles. It can easily induce brain trauma on a zombie, and can also fight, wound, and kill humans pretty well, including humans wearing helmets. It would be good for breaking windows, breaking through doors, and even opening cans of soup if you're confident that you have as immune to zombie residue in your food as Rick and Daryl are. There's no edge to maintain or worry about damaging because it meant to be an indestructible hunk of metal for bashing and crumpling other hunks of metal. And whoever happens to be inside...

Lucky break for the guy who can only control Earth that he didn't crash-land anywhere else in the universe.

Negan is now and always shall be the one true Foghorn Leghorn of the zombie apocalypse. As for the water system: I think it works like this:

I'm not really clear on what Carol was supposed to explain to Lydia ahead of time. "OK, so, we're going out to do something about the whisperers, because we both know that they're gonna keep on creeping around our land making trouble. So we're probably gonna go some places where they have a good chance of seeing us. So, just so we're completely clear on this... do you know what will happen if they see you alive?" "If they what then they what now?" "Well, if they see you alive, that means... that they see you alive." "Oh, wow. Shit, I never thought of that. I guess I'm not very smart, huh?" "No, bless your heart, you're amazingly stupid. Why don't you just stay home and pick some tomatoes?" "Those are the little tree nuts that Judith eats, right?"

Father Pee Pants can never be killed. He's too slippery.

Not this crap again. I wasn't even on Rick's side very often by the time he flew off to Dumpster Heaven. Why the hell would I be on Negan's?

It's possible he doesn't. He might be really enjoying the spy-life, sort of like the old time KGB operatives who preferred being stationed undercover in the U.S. Seems like Lydia ought to have been able to recognize him, though.

Hey, as long as you're here, can we get another letter from you, maybe re-thinking the whole not killing Negan thing?

Holy crap, Chandler looks 12 again.

These people do not have good luck with doctors, do they?

OK, new plan: Lydia walks into Skintown rattling some chains and saying "Booooooooooooo..."

This just in! Crazy Doctor is crazy! Somebody get Nurse Lori on the phone, stat.

Wait, Eugene isn't the smartest? I think somewhere the loose ends on his ass are itching at that comment.

This reminds me of when Homer ate the world's hottest chili pepper.

Do the whisperers have their own fog machine?

He's allergic to jelly.

I don't need to hear this random extra's entire death bed schtick.

Well, they did say they wanted that guy to talk. They got a whole speech out of him.

I feel sorry for the makeup people trying to make Rosita look bad.

Do they really need to show this Star Wars commercial every five minutes? I mean, either you love Star Wars and are obviously going to watch the damned movie, or you're like me and are absolutely never going to give a fuck.

Carol, meet Lydia. Bye, Lydia. Nice knowing you.

Gabe should try to make peace with Alpha. They go to the same barber shop.

Was that Evil dead style wobbly freakout not supposed to be funny?

Nice of Kirkman to give his nephew a DJ job, I suppose.