ReadMeLattice

I think she just feels like because they don't show as many "nice" moments of her, she looks bad? But it doesn't mean the things they show didn't happen. It also seems that that kind of thing happens more on The Bachelor/ette or those housewife shows where there's always 1 "totally bad" character who's there to stir things up. Obviously that's selected by producers a lot of the time. But when TM started it always seemed like Jenelle was the chosen "bad girl" of the series. Same with Farrah. Leah and Amber weren't portrayed badly, they were more the "down home small town country girls" of the show. Kailyn and Cate were dealing with life without responsible parents, Maci and Chelsea had better support systems and lived more suburban lives. They each had a "thing." But then Leah and Amber ended up being even worse than the "villains" selected for the show. And notice that both of them constantly complain about unfair "editing."

The thing I don't get is...Fine. I get that reality shows aren't actual "reality." They need a narrative and sometimes if there's not one true villain, the producers select one. So let's pretend for a moment that Chelsea gets the sweetheart edit while Leah is made to look bad, or at least that the truth is more nuanced than what they show. I'm sure it's happened on other shows and that is a legit thing that goes on in the world of reality TV. Why not just...Quit the show and make a public statement about how you won't be part of a dishonest program, like some others have when they've felt they weren't fairly portrayed on television? It just makes it look like you're lying (which obvs she is) when you live in rural West Virginia and are unemployed and could clearly live off what you've already earned, social media posts and an easy job at a local store. In fact, you could live like a queen off that in her area. I would understand more if she needed to pay for disability related expenses for Ali and needed the extra cash (my husband is a wheelchair user and Lord knows that's expensive), but it doesn't seem they actually use any helpful medical equipment, classes or therapies. Why just keep complaining every season about your awful treatment but keep accepting the checks and the notoriety? I'm not denying that producers in general can probably be manipulative, but if that was really the case here, it could easily be solved by quitting and speaking out against it. Her failure to do so just makes it clear that the editing is not the real issue. If she wants to prove she's in the right, continuing to appear on the show just makes her look like a grifter and a liar to boot.

"Leah struggles to cope" should just be the title of every episode she's in. Or her biography.

I personally would also have expected Nathan to be too narcissistic (in terms of *his kid*-- he doesn't seem to want to raise them but he is into them being *his*) to do that...But I guess he lacks any sort of control.

She's now been hit in the head with a mason jar and choked twice...As someone posted earlier, people who choke their partners are extremely likely to kill. For some reason, it's much more of a red flag than even hitting or punching. At least she had the sense to call the cops but I hope he gets some consequences this time and/or she moves to get away. I sincerely hope she'd never go back to him but you never know with abusers.

Jenelle claims Nathan abused her while she was pregnant if I recall correctly. That's Jenelle saying that, of course, so take it with a grain of salt. Babs says the same thing, though (that he put his hands on her while she was pregnant), and I have a tad more faith in her word. I think anybody who can break in twice to someone's home, pin them to a bed and choke them would have zero qualms about doing the same to a pregnant woman as long as he felt she "deserved" it...I don't think he draws the line anywhere.

Totally. But if he gets convicted (apparently her roommate was a witness this time, unlike the last time he choked her, so that's something), he might get no custody of him anyway. There have been no real witnesses to the other assaults-- only Jenelle was there when Gary allegedly assaulted her, only Jessica was there when Nathan choked her the first time (not putting allegedly for that one), and when Jenelle hit Jessica with the jar (also not alleged, lol), Nathan claimed to be a witness but later it was found that he'd repeatedly lied to the police, which was the major reason Jenelle was acquitted. So maybe the witness this time will help? Here's hoping. She says he had her pinned to the bed covering her mouth so she couldn't call for help, claims this has happened several times so they always have the doors locked, and claims he then banged on the roommate's window all night and took her phone outside to get Jessica to come out and talk to him. Nathan wrote a super creepy thing on Instagram in response to Jessica's roommate's account of the situation. All of these folks are always crazy but he really seems to be currently having a breakdown. Scary stuff. Also: I bet Jessica really regrets ever being involved with this man or this show...She's gotten hit in the head with a jar and choked out twice, as well as had her house broken into.

Is there any chance he will go to prison this time? Apparently where he lives you can commit violent acts left and right and nothing will ever happen to you. https://www.google.com/amp/s/alltheteenmoms.net/2014/03/12/did-nathan-griffith-lie-about-military-awards/amp/?client=ms-android-verizon Btw, can someone who knows more about the military give some context to these claims, since we're discussing his time in the military?

It's in their legal agreement that he cannot see her unsupervised or after drinking because he and the ex were both addicts and drank/used around the baby. I don't trust him because he swore up and down, like Jenelle, that he would get full custody of his kid and fight til the end, but then rolled over and agreed to that lane custody agreement they had despite claiming his kid was "in danger." He's in danger but it's fine for him to be at risk well over half the time? I'm not one for encouraging kids to go to foster homes but in this case that honestly may be the best option.

Nathan has never made any real effort to get Kaiser at all, or his daughter, so I don't know why he'd start now. He doesn't give a crap about either of them, just wants people to think he's a good dad. Considering his charges, he likely won't have much of a choice anyway.

I don't deny that PTSD exacerbated his problems (I have complex PTSD myself), I just don't believe for a second that Nathan wasn't previously violent or at least had violent tendencies. I don't know the exact timeline of his problems with his ex and daughter but as I understand it, they began well before he was diagnosed or discharged. I also think he's a sociopath who doesn't see anything wrong with what he's doing, so I doubt he'll get any help. Btw he also got a DUI last week...How many charges is he up to now? There are new reports that he is giving up full custody of Kaiser...So much for fighting Jenelle for custody. Probably for the best though, he's obviously currently going off the rails.

Which clearly means he choked her. Which makes twice that he's done that to Jessica. Jenelle accused him of it too and even on-screen he switched the topic to Kieffer. Clearly he did it. I don't know if PTSD is the whole reason for this, though obviously it does contribute possibly or worsen his addiction at least. I would think it's likelier that he joined the military to blow off some of his constant "steam" but it just made it worse. I'd be shocked if he had none of these problems before the military. Also, he no longer collects/qualifies for disability from the military, so his PTSD diagnosis is suspect IMO. Maybe he exhibited signs, but that may have been his erratic violent nature to begin with. He is textbook violent abuser and my belief is that he always was. He has another child he doesn't see and wasn't allowed to unsupervised for a long time because he was constantly drunk around her. His statements are chilling...Remind me of my abusive ex, who choked me and held a knife to me. Nathan has very similar behavioral patterns. He's a piece of shit. Nathan is seriously the scariest person on this show to me because I 100% believe he could and might kill someone.

I think it makes a lot of sense that they want to feel safe...The girls never truly had a father figure and their mothers were always insecure and fearful. I know the guys didn't either. I assume that's why several of them want to be involved in the military while the girls want immediate marriage. New/alternative family structures because theirs was crap.

Usually I'm inclined to say that a girl "deserves better" if she's with a douche, but at this point I'm not sure what either is offering. Something to think about: can you imagine these two cooking at home, or living everyday lives together? It's actually really hard for me to imagine the two of them holding down jobs or raising a kid or even finishing school. Even going to the post office, for God's sake! I was immature and lost as a 19 year old too, but if I'd tried to get married my folks would have known enough to say "you're an adult but that is fucking stupid."

Anyway, back to the show. The catfish writes recaps of each episode. Enjoy. http://www.notbatmanyet.com/archives/4096

I disagree and heard the message many times. I'm glad you had positive experiences, but I'm also not pro LDS at this point. I found the church stifling, misogynistic (well, they're pretty overtly so), and I think how they talk about LGBTQ members and the new extra-homophobic policy about children of gay parents is truly morally disgusting. So we aren't likely to agree on the church. As far as GC statements on celestial marriage, they very explicitly state that temple marriage is vastly superior and essentially required of members and that it's a tragedy if you don't marry in the temple. I'd like to see the source of that exact quote because it's pretty misleading. Here are Kimball's feelings on celestial marriage, and I don't find them "kind" at all. https://www.lds.org/ensign/1979/10/the-importance-of-celestial-marriage?lang=eng

Unmarried folks or non-members are very different, I didn't say anything about them. I mean people who get married but not in the temple and how that's talked about at General Conference and in YSA wards and the like. Many people report the same, but that's my experience and I'm sure we have different ones. Especially in Utah, I heard many women directly say that anyone who couldn't marry them in the temple wasn't worthy of them.

And now he's headed to Miami this month, Japan next and Disney next summer, according to him, with his girlfriend. Who he's supposedly only been seeing for a month. While he's still in the Air Force. Hmmmm. Something seems fishy. He's gonna make the same mistakes all over again.

They used to do it pretty frequently for cohabitation (an extra thing that most states don't have laws against), as @Roslyn says. It began due to the state's clash with JS.

Yeah, you're right, it's illegal everywhere. I've only heard of active prosecution in Utah because they want to distance themselves from polygamy. When I was LDS, I lived in New York, TN, Utah and California. I didn't know anybody who wasn't sealed who wasn't pretty actively shunned or considered unworthy. Most people I knew said they'd never get married except in the temple; people who didn't were considered "inactive" and got visits from the missionaries, even if they attended church. I assume it's different in places with very few Mormons. Either way the doctrine says you can't get into the celestial kingdom without being sealed.

This is also true because in Utah, polygamy is illegal. So they don't always follow the rules to a T because they're hiding out. In my experience, LDS members who don't get sealed are very much looked down on. It seems like the AUB is more freewheeling because everything they're doing is pretty sketchy anyway.

My understanding is that they were not sealed since he was not a member in good standing and they had not kept the law of chastity.

Big Love isn't an accurate representation of LDS doctrine. Women can only be sealed to one man in their lifetime unless they go through a lengthy cancellation process (perhaps proving extensive abuse). After being widowed, they can be sealed by proxy after their *own* deaths, but it is believed they will only be with one man in the afterlife and Heavenly Father will choose. In life they can only be sealed to one man unless they get a sealing "cancellation" (which is generally not after a death of a spouse). This is because LDS doctrine still allows polygyny but not polyandry, and because only your male spouse can allow you into the afterlife.

Sometimes no. They generally have to fight the leaders for it. There is controversy over that because polygyny is still in LDS doctrine, but polyandry is not.

You cannot, generally, be unsealed and resealed as a woman. There may be some exceptions. Generally only men can do that. General reactions: I don't really see major differences between Maddie and Mykelti except that Maddie is calmer and more likable. Otherwise they're the same. Demanding and spoiled, just like their father and mothers. Both are 19 year old college dropouts with zero job skills or goals and high expectations for their weddings. Maddie's just better at making promises she won't keep. She doesn't seem mature at all to me. Likable, yes, but childish and impulsive. Willing to throw it all away for a guy. Mykelti seems awkward and out of place. Dangerous for a girl in that spot in her life to get engaged. Some say Mariah is spoiled but I don't necessarily see that. She got great grades in school and worked full time throughout, in her chosen field. Aspyn has also done well and volunteered and worked throughout school. Logan has always worked, had a near 4.0 average and is now in grad school. I don't see them getting vacations and tons of "honoring" and favoritism.