Vanderboom

I love how Michaela isn't even on the list! Although I wonder how it would have gone if she and Zach swapped with Britt and Ryan. Ryan would have driven her up the wall! This level of financial analysis beats Jose and his whiteboard! I think Myrla's a drag, but her most redeeming feature is her self-awareness. She KNOWS she's a pain-in-the-ass. Gil's judgy "jokes" were funny at first, but it does seem as if he can't stop picking at her. Myrla got a taste of her own medicine when Gil claimed he doesn't like sunsets, but I can't see her harping on it later the way Gil does ("Wanna watch Twilight? I guess not since you hate sunsets!").

Hmmm. Was Sunny shading a former cast member when she talked about how useless her Art History studies were? 🤔 Also: the Dear Evan Hansen people should have just committed to the Grease casting. Ben Platt looks even older next to the younger looking supporting cast.

This was the most hilarious 30 seconds of this episode. Crystal has steadily been losing cool points in the past two episodes, but she still has work to do if she truly wants to be a contender for Nefarious Housewife.

I was reminded of a scene in Everybody Loves Raymond when Amy tells Raymond that he checks out of conversations because he has nothing important to say. Ryan's perma-deadpan may be hiding mediocrity. I really hope it's the editing because how could you not be flattered by that Jenga game? It's like he wants Brett to do the work of both people in this marriage. You don't have to connect as soulmates in order to say thank you and return a few compliments.

What's Johnny's (really, Autocorrect? You thought I was going to say Johnnycake? 🙄) problem? He doesn't want Bao to take what he says seriously? Especially since he keeps talking about how he "isn't there yet" or "hasn't felt the spark"? Bao's Serious Conversation approach strikes Johnnycake as repetitive and unnecessary, but what is she supposed to do when her husband constantly complains about their marriage? Apparently, I'm the only person in the universe who doesn't see the appeal of Goat Yoga. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

So true. The tag line, the step-grandad/husband, and the cult are all red flags, but I can't help liking Mary *a little* for her reaction to Heather's description of Jen's Friendship Juice. I wonder what Mary would be like if her grandmother had just left her alone.

I kinda want Berkeley to let him speak just so that Bill can finally heal and move on in his life. I'm glad that Sunny and Whoopi both called out his disingenuousness.

I thought that was kinda cute. I'm not married or in a relationship right now, but I think "liking the same sort of gossip" is a key part of compatibility. Then again, if The Experts don't even ask about attitudes toward pets or kids, then they clearly don't really care about compatibility. If anything, maybe they should do a season where family and close friends pick the couples? I'm impressed by the insights at the housewarming conversations, except for Michaela’s friends, who seem to be talking about a different person. Michaela doesn't seem used to accountability. Tearful apologies get forgiveness, but she's not forced to change her behavior. The other guys thought Zack was joking when he said Michaela might kill him, and he probably was, but he's definitely picking up on her rage issues. All of this was going through my head when Gil was talking about how Johnny should trust the experts. Johnny definitely needs to adjust his mindset, but his faith should not be put in people who have a vested interest in creating as much drama as possible. You're so right about this! I think that on some level, Johnny is looking for wife who will fix all the damage that his relationship his dad has done. For example, he feels his dad criticizes him, so he wants his wife to be adoring. His dad may want him to be more reserved and traditional, so Johnny may want his wife to admire his outgoing-ness. Johnny is so caught up in what Bao isn't that he fails to appreciate all that Bao is.

I'm an angry cryer, so I know how frustrating it is to burst into tears when you want to hulk out in rage. I hope Garcelle and Sutton (and Dorit, to a lesser extent) resist the pressure to coddle Erika. Crystal should be embarrassed by her toadying. She was in the right in her earlier conflicts with Sutton, and she should recognize the playbook Erika is using because Sutton used it against her; force dramatic confrontation, then deflect and play victim to dodge accountability. She's so eager to sit with the Cool Kids at Sutton's expense that she ignores Erika's lies, threats, and inconsistencies. Not a good look! Seems like she's used to leveraging Tom's reputation to rain destruction on her enemies. Or at least threaten promise to.

It's sometimes a nickname for Guillermo. 😊

Today's show didn't seem to go anywhere, but rest assured, they got in a plug for Doctors on Demand! I felt so bad for the son; those accusations are heart-breaking. I wish Phil and the other psychologist talked more about why the mother might feel as unsafe as she does. My gut feeling is that something traumatic certainly happened to her, but she hasn't really healed from it and now sees trauma around every corner. Instead, we got Phil getting weirdly competitive with this woman (not a direct quote, but something to the effect of "No one cares more about rape and human trafficking than ME!") and trying to force her to admit she was wrong about her son.

What?! Political disagreement without bad faith arguments or immature tantrums? 😮 Welcome to The View!

Candiace would have been better off if she stuck to criticizing Ashley's messiness; insulting Ashley's appearance gives her cover to dodge responsibility for her role in trying to embarrass Wendy. Why go after Ashley's looks? Go after her behavior!

Absolutely! Myrla's whining is fair game, but the way she chooses to use money that she's earned honestly shouldn't be. I'm a big fan of flirtatious banter, but Gil seems to be hiding his judgmental attitude behind "jokes." I didn't like him shittalking Myrla behind her back to the other couples, either. Perhaps Myrla is hyper-aware of the cameras and feels self-conscious about kissing and sex with an audience. For sure, she shouldn't have signed up for this show then, but I get the feeling that actually being on a reality tv show is more intense than in theory. I will, however, be grateful to Gil for renaming macarons as "booji cookies." Jose's Financial Whiteboard of Mystery is fine, but I can't believe he didn't think that his wife would have her own ideas about her own money. What if Rachel was just like him? Would he have been willing to adapt to her long term financial goals? I'm hoping that Michaela was a victim of editing. I can't wrap my head around her logic; my husband is missing this morning, so I'm going to pack up and leave? Zach is right that this is a red flag because her response seemed scarily disproportionate.

Yes. Crystal was an asshole to take part in the gang-up on Sutton but her actions were within acceptable Housewives Shenanigans range; there was no fraud, character assassination, extreme hypocrisy, or violence. That said, Crystal needs to wise up about the way she talks about #MeToo; passively contributing to sexual harassment culture is nothing to brag about.

As long as it's not someone with a famous/politician parent or spouse, I'm okayish. S. E. Cupp doesn't thrill me, but I'd rather see her on the show than Bari Weiss or Janice Dean or any other Friend of Meghan. Eboni K. Williams' actions make it clear that her Housewives stint was just a springboard to her preferred career. I'd rather see her on The View than creating artificial Teachable DEI Moments on RHONY.

So true. I really think Wendy underestimated the Real Housewives experience; it opens your life up to the public in ways you cannot control, and even if you think you're going to be the Witty Commentator who can keep your reputation intact, you've got to bring some drama to the table to avoid resentful cast members, accusations of "fakeness," or boring the audience. I'm torn about Robyn and Juan. On one hand, I find Juan tiresome, and I think he should treat Robyn better. On the other hand, I want them to get married because I want Michael to be wrong and miserable. At least Wendy knows Karen's advice about her candle business is legit? Karen's doing her usual thing of lying by focusing on a technicality; will Wendy join Candiace at the Betrayed Protégé Table?

Oh, dear . . . Ashley and her low-ass expectations of Michael. She's acts so pleasantly surprised that he doesn't punt the baby into traffic or something. 🙄

Next year it'll be gruel and a copy of The Muppet Christmas Carol. Perhaps Erika will learn something about those who cheat widows and orphans. To use a line from Project Runway, I question her taste level. I don't blame Kathy. I get bored every time Dorit speaks, too. You know how tedious you have to be when the cast of RHOBH, the Queens of Talking a Conflict to Death, finds you unnecessarily repetitive?

It's like a Housewives-based boob job mathematical formula. If the distance between Potomac Wendy's boobs is x, and the relative height of NY Ramona's lift is y, then how many NY Leah Uniboobs can fit into a Beverly Hills Dorit cleavage? I didn't realize The Tunnel was iconic; it looks like half my high school was cooler than I thought! Then again, Leah obviously is stuck at age 17, so maybe that tracks. They're clearly talking about how much they adore Sonja . . .

It seems as if going to a real, off-screen therapist was a good idea. I hope Wendy does the same. I liked that she was having none of the concern-trolling but hated that she resorted to threats. The asskicking comments made Wendy look out of control. If there is one (and ONLY one) thing we can learn from Gizelle, it's how to keep your composure in the face of confrontation. Another thing that bothers me is that The Conversation keeps calling out Wendy as being insecure as if that's a new and special flaw. We're all insecure about something; it's pretty much a part of being human. Wendy's response to her insecurities, though, is problematic. It's as if she's flailing around for an identity, which brings me back to my earlier point that she could probably work this out in therapy. If Wendy wants to be a Housewife character, then she should have tried for the Greek Chorus Smartass, like early-season Bethenny of RHONY.

I'm not sure what the ladies wanted from Wendy at lunch. They bring up that she was upset with Gizelle then interrupt with tone-policing nonsense when she tried to explain why she was upset. Ashley wasn't even there and Mia of the Ever-changing Resumé doesn't know Wendy well enough to interject.

I know, right?! The Sutton Redemption Arc is awesome. Sutton the Performatively Fragile becomes Sutton the Heroic Legal Analyst who can't be stopped, not even by the bus Dorit threw her under. I hope Sutton, Garcelle, and Crystal end up on the same side of Andy at the reunion. Someone--maybe Mikey?--should tell Erika that the Our Maiden of Eternal Sorrow Act would be more convincing if her stories were more consistent. At the very least, she could say that finding out about the victims was the final straw that made her glad to be getting a divorce, along with his cheating and mistreatment. See how that all hangs together? You don't need the bizarre car accident (who on Earth would call Erika and not the police if they drove off a cliff?) or proof of diminished mental capabilities to be on the right side of this.

I don't get it, either. My guess is that the wonky editing cut out some important conversations? I have to say, though, that these latest Leah-lite episodes are the best of the season so far. Yes, I'm watching in horror through my fingers, but it made me pay attention to the social dynamics. I'm actually curious about Eboni's enabling tendencies; how could ANYONE find common ground with Ramona after she tried to one-up a woman who nearly died giving birth? Kristen Wiig used to play that really annoying character (Penelope?) on SNL that always hijacked the conversation by making every topic about herself. Ramona was an even less charming version. The excuses would have infuriated me; did she really think no one else was hungry or tired? Or that no one else has ever spoken before thinking?

Absolutely! That was my first thought as well. Kathy can provide funny moments sometimes but she definitely likes to stir the pot, especially when Sutton is involved.