ZeeEnnui

THIS. The last two episodes were so stressful. If I were in Rachel's shoes, I'd probably have panicked too. What I don't get is the blind loyalty these women have to Anna. Like, sure she comes off as this super rich, fascinating person but those Benjamins she throws around come with some serious red flags. I couldn't believe that Rachel bought Anna's bs for 3 months. That's insane (and delusional). I'd have hit her with a strongly worded legal letter threatening action. These people all need Kacy's drunk client, Photographer Piz and Neff's boyfriend to shake some sense into them when it comes to Anna's shady shenanigans. Neff can take all of the seats. She really drank the Anna Kool-Aid. I can't believe after everything she's still on Anna's side, and blaming Rachel for being a bad friend. There is loyalty and then there is denial.

Dull-eyed Marian almost got Pamuked in the hallway! I feel like Aunt Agnes may want to take a page out of Bertha's book and put a governess on Marian's ass since she's too dumb to live. Also, there is NO WAY that Aurora or Bertha wouldn't have side-eyed Raikes just showing up. The IMPROPRIETRY (faints on couch). Marian would never have been allowed to have Raikes walk her to her door let alone get tongued. Come on... Aurora Fane as a chaos agent. I kind of love it. She's grudgingly coming around to Bertha but I can't believe that she'd catch more of Agnes' fire to invite a social climbing nobody lawyer to such an important lunch. What's with Turner and the super long eye contact with George? Girl, he tossed your naked ass outta bed AND let you keep your job. I'd scurry out of every room I had to share with him after that. The team up between Turner and Oscar would have been interesting had we not already seen how lame Turner's machinations are. Check your bed before you turn out the lights, Oscar! I was hoping that Peggy was going to stay strong and keep shutting out Gilded Age Karen, but the show can't have real consequences for the cast sheet's least valuable member apparently. A little advice to Ada and Agnes, start pimping Marian out to every eligible bachelor in the city (The Bachelorette: Manhattan Island). Get that slice of crustless Wonder Bread with mayo out into society so she has less time to say dumb shiz, and hang with shady Raikes.

Karen's gonna Karen, am I right Marian? What a fuckwhit. As a viewer, I died from secondhand cringe during Marian's terrible no good, very racist decision to visit Peggy's family. UNANNOUNCED. Like, who invited you?!? Those manky boots are made for walking, so beat it out of Brooklyn. Can Marian suffer some period appropriate malady like cholera or tuberculosis or anything that can kill you while playing the Oregon Trail? Just get her off my screen (and into acting lessons). Did the Gilded Age have a literary equivalent to He's Just Not That Into You? Turner could really use a copy. I cheered when George told Turner what we've all been screaming at our TVs - he loves his wife, and he doesn't need her scheming nips. I did think it was kind of lame to not fire her ass (this will come back to haunt him for sure). I vaguely remember in the pilot that Turner was hired because she'd worked in old money society, but we haven't seen enough of her interactions with Bertha to see the value of keeping her. At least on Downton, the dynamics between Cora and O'Brien/ Mary and Anna were complex and well-developed. Okay, Raikes is totally shady, right? There is no way that a nobody lawyer from Pennsylvania can social climb that quickly without shenanigans.

Ugh. Yes. I think I'd wiped the memory of the Sybil and Tom toxic courtship from my memory. Ladies love an aggressive guy telling you how you feel, am I right? As much as I disliked Tom/Sybil, I ended up loving the friendship that developed between Mary and Tom (and ended up being kind of bummed when she ended up with Matthew Goode, which shocked even me, because Matthew Goode!). At least, Larry Russell was cute. So far he's just as boring as Marion, so they can go fade into the background together (hopefully off our screens).

Two characters that really need to read a room: Marian and Mrs. Russell's Lady's Maid Who Wants a Piece of Mr. Russell's Beard and Fortune. The miscalculation this show has made with Marian is that they seem to think she's a plucky young upstart who is shaking things up because she's not a part of New York establishment. And, that might have worked with an actress who could actually act -- apparently the Streep Talent Gene got used up by Mamie and Grace -- but Louisa Jacobson just can't pull off charming, compelling or more interesting than watching paint dry. The last two episodes all she does is say "but the Russell's have money, let them spend it." Wash, rinse, repeat. Yes, and you've been told why that's not gonna happen. Did the Gilded Age have a slow carriage because Marian should take a ride on that. I feel pretty sure that we were ALL Ada when she told Marian to STFU at the lunch. Whatever with the lawyer luvah. The first episode Marian wanted nothing to do with him, the second she was polite, and the third she's not saying no to a very rushed proposal. I guess Lady's Liberty's forearm was a great place for romantic feels [eye roll]. As for Turner -- and, yes I had to go to IMDB to figure out the characters name. The cast is waaay too big -- the lady's maid. Gurrrlll, have you not noticed that Mr. Russell is hot for Bertha? For someone who is supposedly so devious she really can't take a hint...he's not that into you. Also, probably not dumb enough to step out with the help. More John Adams shirtless, please. You go, Oscar!

Hard agree with all of this. If Team Rusty had been eliminated, I probably would have lost any interest in watching the rest of the season. Between Cringe-fluencers Kim and Penn, the L is for Lame twins, Woo Girls flight attendants, and Mapquest Morons Arun and Natalia...I can't root for any of these people. The pandemic was hard on everyone, apparently it meant that CBS couldn't cast anyone you wanted you wanted to see win. Plus these people are either dumb, lack attention to detail or are physically not up to the race. You don't have to be a gym rat to be worth cheering for, but at least be good at something. Kim and Penn are the only ones that I'd trust to travel with, and I'd hate having to spend time with their "always on" asses. Was Rusty a little intense? Sure. But as "dude bros" go, it's a lowercase "b" on the bro part. Also, Ryan is awesome and after everything that was done to him, I really appreciate his attitude. So, yes, I'm all in for Rusty. Miss me with that but the flight attendants left meeee, bs. Grouping the teams at the beginning of each leg is enough of a participation trophy. This is a race, not summer camp where you'll be friends forever. I have no time for people who lose sight of competing because of some made up "nice person" rules that exist only in their head. Interesting that Akbar didn't have anything to say about "....as a former competitive athlete" when he's the one lagging. Sherri deserves better. Glad they were put out of their misery and eliminated. I see marriage counseling in their future.

The next time I'm a dick to someone and they call me on it, I'm just going to tell them, "well, as a former competitive athlete...." I hope that the next challenge takes place in a paper bag. Guarantee Arun and Natalia won't be able to find their way out. I can't take the twins or the flight attendants with their "you're amazing. NO you are. tee hee." Vom. Team #RUSTY for the win! The only thing that can stop them now...a Charlie Horse.

I'm glad that I wasn't the only one left scratching my head about Cal's timeline. The music supervisor KILLED it with the soundtrack for his back story but those songs don't quite gel with whatever early 90s timeline they were going for. I was definitely thinking Cal's closeted origin story was taking place somewhere between 1987-89 based on the tunes. But I can buy a 1990-91 timeline if you go by Eric Dane's real life age (he's turning 50 this year). Nate must have a much older sibling who is pushing 30 and hopefully got the hell out of East Highland, and away from Cal.

I never pegged Kurt as a Return to Oz fan. His trophy room was clearly inspired by Mombi.

I read an interview with Ricard where he said that he bonded with Xander but he couldn't let his friendship with him influence his vote. He didn't feel that Xander played the game as well as Erica. But he was pretty clear that he was close to Xander and considered him a friend. I did feel like there was bitterness about the idol, but Ricard didn't think much of Xander's game. I disagree with that because I thought Xander played a smart game for a guy that was pretty much on his own solo tribe. Erica also mentioned being very close to Xander, so it seemed like he did form some close bonds with people there. I guess this is what happens when you stop focusing your show on the survivors of Survivor, and spend all of your time documenting the dumb twists and turns that Jeff thought up while going stir crazy during quarantine. Smooth move there, CBS. [All the eye rolls].

I think you're onto something here. I'm not sure where Xander is from but I'm born and raised in Southern California, and you tend to have a vocal fry or "dude bro" tone in your voice. I'm a woman but I have a similar way of talking, and throughout my life there have been moments where people think that I'm being insincere or sarcastic when that's not my intention (it always throws me off when people say that). Don't get me wrong, my default setting is sarcasm, but people tend to react to that long, slow drawl negatively. I was Team Xander, but not upset about Erica's win. He played a good game, but was on his own for a lot, and that's how he operated. It doesn't seem like anyone disliked him though...just failed to make a connection.

In fairness, the last time that Heather realized that things were different for black people in America was during a very special episode of Different Strokes. Give her another 40 years, and she'll learn about white privilege. Welcome back to tribal, Shan's Stank Face. Someone should tell her that she lost, and may want to swallow that bitter pill before she chokes on it. DeShawn and Danny couldn't make it through 10 minutes of a game of Risk. These guys don't have a strategic bone in their body unless anarchy and panic are now considered strategy (looking at you, DeShawn). Anyone who has the confidence to wear a velvet headband -- last seen in my Sears childhood holiday photo from the early 90s -- isn't going to be worried about DeShawn's truth bellyflops. I'm sorry to see Danny go. In the end, while I like him more than DeShawn, it's smarter to get rid of Danny. He's jury catnip. At the start of this season, I loathed Ricard, but over time I've coming to appreciate him (and his mad balancing bar skills). He's smart, observant, and just plays the game. If he won, I don't think I would be mad about it. I've been Team Xander since the beginning of the season. He may look like a guy that has blacklight posters in his dorm, and listens to Phish, but under those unruly locks hides a keen mind. Xander has been on his own nearly this entire game, and the fact he's survived and no one has really gunned for him -- aside from Evvie and her Amazing Technicolor Underpants or Waaaahhhh I Hate Xander Because I'm a Dumb Toddler, Liana -- at tribal council.

Glad I'm not alone here. I think the conversation that is being had is really important, and needs happen. However, the cynical TV watcher in me wondered if this was a calculated move by DeShawn to gain sympathy and do emergency damage control after Shan blew his spot last tribal. I hope in real life Liana is book smart, because she's definitely not Survivor smart. At least now she'll get some food, a shower, and can write about mean, old Xander in her burn book. Heather removed the Visor of White Obliviousness, let her hair down, and donned the Bandana of Wokeness. Probst, your work on racial awareness is done. You've saved society. Haha. I guess Rip Van Karen just slept through everything that's happened (and continues to happen) to black people in this country. Oh, there's trouble? Not at the country club there's not. Someone get Heather another Tom Collins. I couldn't decide if Shan had been crying or was downwind from all the fumes from Probst's bullshit. Didn't anyone ever tell, Shan...Jesus doesn't like sore losers? The producers of Survivor really don't understand high stakes gameplay, do they? I mean, pick a box, any box is not exactly high drama. What next? Plinko of Peril? Tiddlywinks of Terror? Hopscotch of Horror?

All I said last week was that I couldn't wait for Ricard to stab Shan in the back, and in a Thanksgiving miracle worthy of a Charlie Brown special, I got my wish. Take your lame-ass villain humming and go back to brow-beating the youth at bible class, Shan! When Liana told Jeff that she was a student of strategy at Tribal, I choked on my leftover turkey sandwich. Girl...I wouldn't trust you to strategize your way out of a game of Hungry Hungry Hippos, let alone Survivor. #TeamXander I'll give Erica a little credit for strategy with her splitting the votes plan, but lets be real: only Blair Waldorf can be smart enough to pull off a scheme while wearing a velvet, pearl-studded headband on a desert island.

Da Denise and Red Flag Dan are already in couples therapy? They haven't been married that long. Run Denise, run! Your mom will keep your husband's chili heated for you. Is it just me or is Walker kind of goofy this season. He's so twitchy and "aw shucks." I don't mind Walker being less angsty (and I definitely don't miss the gauzy flashbacks of the dead wife), but for someone who has spent all that time undercover which requires acting I don't get why he has to act like such a goofball. Maybe switch to decaf or something. Team Liam on this one. Walker needs to get over the BARN OF GUILT AND SECRETS since I'm even more sure this week that Evil Chili Mom murdered her husband since we now know in flashback that the Davidson's were fighting. Unless Walker is keeping things close to his vest then there is no way that Liam is the only one that isn't suspicious of Red Flag Dan's presence at the Walker ranch.

Umm...not sure how Chrystelle is trading on her looks in the tent. These aren't professional actors, they're home bakers that are not used to being on camera. A lot of them have awkward quirks that may seem outsized or "phony" -- hell constant Zoom's during the pandemic have alerted me to some of my most annoying fidgety quirks -- but that's because they're not used to being on camera. I remember Candice Brown who won a few years ago. A lot of people didn't like her bold lipstick or lip licking because it came off as a little affected but again just nerves. Chrystelle is really funny (Candice was too), and I'll bet she's a blast over a drink or three at the pub. Like these bakes, it's all down to personal taste when it comes to the bakers. This was one hell of a sugary Thunderdome. All four of the bakers came in really strong but if we had to lose someone, I'm okay with Jurgen. What can I say...I hate Matcha with the fire of a thousand suns! Love all three remaining bakers (Chigs can call me anytime) but unless there is a huge upset I'm leaning towards Italy snatching another victory from England this year. Side note: I nearly bought that David Bowie costume Noel was wearing in the opening sketch, but it was sold out. Next year! Also, is the show blackmailing Paul with something -- certainly not his affair scandal. Maybe admitting American desserts aren't terrible? -- to make him perform in the opening skit? No one asked for Paul Hollywood's cringe comedy fails.

Jurgen not getting a handshake for his murder slice cake

I thought that you had to be eighteen to be on Survivor, so what preschool did they find Liana in? Seriously, GROW THE F UP, Liana. The entire season she's acted like a bratty kid in desperate need of a nap. She hates Xander's face? Well, I hate how monumentally dumb and myopic she is. Unless Xander pulled her braids, and made her cry in class then I'm really not sure what her pathological dislike is about. At this point, it's just jealousy. Xander may look like a dude that smells like patchouli and listens to the Grateful Dead, but he runs circles both mentally and strategically around her moronic ass. It's annoying. However, I will give Liana credit for making me LOL when she asked if she could hold onto Xander's idol. Like, she's so hilariously dumb. No girl, that only works with hypocritical youth pastors with their own lame-ass soundtracks. Maybe the season has worn me down but I'm coming around on Ricard (not completely). At least he knows how ridiculous Shan is, and I look forward to him stabbing her in the back. Have a feeling DeShawn is going to regret sending Evvie and her Amazing Technicolor Crotch Undies to the jury.

The character of Dan is really, really weird honestly. He's only recently married to Denise of the Burning Barn of Walker's Nightmares in which her father died. I think when we first met his character, DA Denise mentioned that he had no family of his own, and I get that someone like that would feel strongly about being welcomed into viper's nest of Davidson's, but (and there is a huge BUT) his reaction to a twenty-year-old feud that had nothing to do with him is straight out of crazy town. Dude, you weren't there (unless in a shocking plot twist he was....which makes no sense but you never know). Honestly, if I were dating or married to someone who was that angry about something that didn't happen to them, they'd get ghosted really fast. It's also really bizarre that he spends more time with his MIL than his wife. Like, if they were having an insane soapy affair where Paula Marshall was feeding him poisoned chili pillow talk about the mean old Walker's, then I might actually believe it. DA Denise, open your eyes - your husband is just not that into you, but he's really into your mom. BTW I agree with another poster that there is a whole lot more to this whole barn burning than a simple lantern of contrivance. Who wants to bet that Paula Marshall killed her husband?

I don't think there was any nefarious conspiracy involved in Lizzie being sent home. It sounded like it was pretty close, but I think her lack of presentation skills were the deciding factor here. It sounds petty because a home baker is more interested in how things taste -- no one here is going to choose fondant over flavor -- but in a baking show the food has to look and taste good. You know, refinement. I have to admit I was surprised Lizzie made it as far as she did, and good on her for going out on a Lisa Frank high note. Personally, I'm pretty happy with the final four we have, and would have been gutted if Chigs, Chrystelle or Giuseppe, and Jurgen (even if I'm loving him a bit less than I was earlier in the season) had been sent home - they're just stronger than Lizzie IMO.

I thought it was very nice of Trey to lie and say how good the painting of UNRESOLVED FEELINGS looked. That was a pretty crap piece of tourist junk. Okay, Dave Annabale has turned into a real silver fox, but that DA had better watch her back because that guy is a walking red flag. I hate people who involve themselves in other people's biz. Like, it doesn't even sound like he's been with the DA Denise that long since her fairly recent divorce but damn, bro. Taking over Serrano's surveillance detail is next level trying to impress the in-laws batshit. Chili the always reliable cause of strife on television. I like mine with beans and a side of long-simmering resentment.

A killer on the loose and a series of gruesome deaths.....time to throw a carnival! Shaved ice and tacky dream weavers will win out over corpses every time. Is Margot the killer? She's certainly got the crazy eyes down. I'm guessing she faked her fall as a way to not only keep suspicion off of her but to keep Lennison close, and off Dylan's junk. Dylan continues his seven episode streak as the WORST.

I guess Hot Surf Dad won't be getting a "Best Dad" mug at Christmas. JFC. The least believable thing about this show is not that there is a mysterious killer stalking these teens. No it's that not one but two people on this show were totes in love with Dylan! Unless self-righteous is the new sexy then no, I'm not buying it.

Shut up, Erica! It's time for Jeff-splaining the BIGGEST GAME CHANGER THAT EVER CHANGED GAMES! I forgot to mention it last week, but why is Erica channeling Blair Waldorf on a desert island? I get wanting something to pull back your hair, but unless vintage CW teen soap style is back then maybe bring one from that you can sweat in. If you have a foot fetish (or are Quentin Tarantino) this immunity challenge was for you! Liana is so immature (and delusional about her game play). Your tribe hasn't done well enough nor have you played well enough for anyone to underestimate you. Xander included. If she were a better player, she wouldn't have focused all of her inexplicable "but he pissed in my Corn Flakes" energy on Xander. And, Xander LIT UP her game like a freshly rolled joint. LOL. Well played. He's going to be remembered for that play alone on Most Shocking Survivor moments, and Liana will be stuck with the realization that she's not as good (or even passably mediocre) at this game as she thought she was in her head. The problem that I have with all these "but I grew up watching the game" people are, is that it's easy to play the game from the couch (we're all doing it here), but the focus seems to be on creating this memorable character for the show not playing the game smart or strategically. Visor Lady is so lucky. She essentially coasts through and is gonna be on the jury despite doing nothing. I thought she would have been sent back home in time for happy hour at the golf club before now. Sydney was like a bitchy mall girl from an 80s high school movie but at least she was self-aware enough to know she's a garbage person. Agree with everything you said. I really appreciate people that are adaptable in ever-changing situations, and DeShawn had a good, realistic outlook about the Cher advantage. I get that Danny was pissed (I probably would be too) but we're all living in Probst's crazy world, and you gotta suck it up. Man, I hope that Xander sprinkles Shan with some magical stoner shark Dorito dust and sends her packing, because this is how you play a freaking game!

100%! I've disliked both Ricard and Shan since day one, but credit where its due, Ricard knows how to play the game. What can I say, I'm a sucker for a logical villain. "If you're with me, then you should trust me." Gurl, Ricard has met you and your lame-ass villain soundtrack. The producers can give Shan the winner edit all they want, but she's way too high-strung and emotionally immature to be a truly good strategic player. She lucked out because her teammates put the "G" in gullible. Other tribes with stronger players....not so much. Oh yay, more twists. Stop threatening us with an annoying time, Jeffy. Please stop. I'm serious, STOP. "I really, really believe that this is the hardest season of Survivor." Okay, I want to know how much the producers are paying contestants to say this each episode. It's not harder, it's just hella confusing. You basically need a doctorate in Probstian bug-fuckery (and a minor in hacky sack) to understand what the hell is going on each episode. C'mon, the least the show could've done was leave a volleyball for Erica to befriend. Rude. IDGAF about the survivors back stories. Bring back interpersonal drama. If I want to know more about them, I'd fire up Google. You may be bruised but your hair still is fabulous, Xander! Props for "mergatory"! Count me among those who doesn't understand the Xander sized chip on Liana's shoulder. For all her talk, she's not a particularly good game player, and without Xander's bony shoulders none of their team would have made it over the platform. But then again, my head is too full of butterflies, broccoli and whatever other bullshit we have to remember for this season, and forgot about Xander kicking sand in Liana's face. If Erika smashes that glass, and Jeff doesn't immediately start blasting Cher then I'm done ;)