saber5055

Best line ever. As soon as I read that, I knew some great posts were ahead. I keep forgetting this is on so miss most of it while watching ancient Roseanne reruns. I don't even know what the plot is any more, not that I care, this show whacked out a couple seasons ago. But again I am fascinated by the hair. Weller's appearance actually improved by his homeless-guy wig, he became tolerable for me to look at (see quote above). But Jane went from fakety blackety black hair to fakety whitest blond hair. Nothing like picking the most obvious fake wig, Jane. Why not a nice mousey brown. Of course, the ball cap will totally hide your identity. I was wanting Greg to do the "HEY! Look over there!" when Mom gave him the drink so he could switch out the glasses. WTH writers, that would have been awesome. I really need to look up what happens when someone gets a 3-inch needle stuck into their neck. That's the preferred method of shot giving on tv these days. I still want my injections in my upper arm, please. Right about now, I'm saying giving everyone in the United States a nice Zip shot would not necessarily be a bad thing. I'd queue up for that.

Learn how to say Titan with EmmaSaying free pronunciation tutorials. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a12U1nNPvZI Titan is pronounced the same in British and American English. Listen: https://dictionary.cambridge.org/us/pronunciation/english/titan I tend to believe the Cambridge Dictionary over what anyone says. Someone needs to point the announcer guy to those links. Plus: Homophones: tighten, titan.

The little Aussie girl sings and Simon claps time with the music while staring at the girl with his curiously dead fish eyes. That guy is SO FREAKY sometimes. Meanwhile, he lets the kid know Australia is "a long way away." Gold star for geography, Cowell! The girl sang Dance Monkey's song, which I like, but didn't think she was all that, even though the audience was 100 percent on its feet, clapping along, and judges all clapping along. Then she gets a standing O. And get this: Howie tells her YOU ARE A STAR! That's the first time that's been said on this show, ever. EVER! I didn't think she was all that great, but I heard her replayed on the radio the next morning and she sounded pretty good, kinda sorta like Dance Monkey. So I guess she's okay. I mean, for a 12 year old from so far away. I like Shakira/Shaquira, thought she was good. The XMen dancers were not in synch and I thought they would have been kicked to the curb on WOD, so I was surprised Howie and a couple others thought the same, and said the same. Then Simon Cowell says "It's your first time auditioning so it's okay to not be great." WTH! Why is it okay for some, not others. I swear, this show ... The eyeball guy made me LOL, and then LOL some more, and I mean loud. I haven't laughed that hard since ... *shrugs* Magician guy was cool. Me likee. The next act is from Australia, giving Simon another chance to tell that person that Australia IS FAR. What's up with this show slo-mo-ing dancers. I hate it. Gold Porno Pants Dancer wasn't very good. Did he say he was in Cirque? I wasn't paying much attention. But if he was, he was not on stage in any Cirque shows. 2020 is The Year of the Contortionist. This stuff doesn't gross me out so I guess I'd never get a seat in the AGT audience where you have to be slack-jawed horrified by such acts. It irked me the camera kept not showing the act so they could instead give us close ups of all the paid ticket holders, but that irks me every week for every act, so there's that. I got a big laugh out of the DON'T TRY THIS AT HOME legal disclaimer shown during the Reagan/Exorcist Head Twist. "Oh, Mom, I just twisted Johnny's head all the way around like I saw on TV last night and now he's not moving." Ha ha ha! Anyway, I did like this act. The rock singer was good I think, although I couldn't understand the words and so did not recognize the song. Not that it matters I guess. The 70+ body builder woman was only put on so Terry could take off his shirt AGAIN and bounce his boobs around AGAIN so we could all admire his fabulous body. As for me, if I never see a shirtless boob-bouncing Terry Crews again, it will be too soon. I HATE HATE HATE this pandering. I did like one of the acts saying he would take Simon to Good Will and buy him a bunch of colorful used t-shirts. Now THAT I can get behind. The silks guy was good, but no way can I believe no one in his family has ever watched his act before. He's a circus guy from a circus family and his wife never saw him do any aerial work? I guess I believe that as much as any other story told on this show. Next week I'm coming to your house @ams1001 for dinner and a watch party. That'll be me knocking on your door. I'll wear my AGT t-shirt so you recognize me.

Akbar was at the Beverly Hills Dog Show and announced some agility competitions, giving play-by-plays as the dogs went through obstacles. He really brings the fun. Agree that the hosts are ... ahem ... not good on this show. I was surprised at the fire fighter having problems with the vertical log carry this time since she kicked Jesse to the curb last week in that part of the challenge.

That would have been AWESOME. Matt and Akbar are the best. This show should hire them even if ANW were running/taping, it'd be worth it for this viewer. I can even see Akbar competing on Mt. Olympus like he ran the Ninja course once.

When the players were introduced, I wondered if Wardrobe has a bunch of skin-tight dresses to put on the women. All of those slinky dresses have a long and I mean a long zipper up the back, one that would stick you in the butt if you ever sat down in one. Check it out next game show. The zipper thing I mean. All the women on every show are wearing them. Anyway, I didn't pay much attention to the ball drops. My mind tends to wander when those happen. I'd be fine if the show just skipped to "You just won ..." or "You just lost ..." X amount, but I guess this show is built on players jumping and shouting and picking up Chris to dance around the stage with him in their arms. So there's that. As soon as I saw "falcon, eagle, vulture" answers come up, I knew the player was screwed, just like on Jeopardy yesterday, I knew Mammals would be the last category chosen. I was right on both accounts. As soon as I saw the video I said "falcon," and then the audio clue "peregrine" made me say "falcon" again. Too bad it made the player say "vulture." But it only gave me $11. *sigh* I'm not a classical music nor ballet fan, but I'm also not a total dumbass so I knew Tchaikovsky wrote Swan Lake and that Bach never wrote any ballets that I'm aware of. So that final ball drop that went into the million slot that wiped out the player's bank account sent me home with $1,750,121. If only that were real ... I got a laugh out of the commercial that played right after yet another couple was sent home from The Wall with a big, fat zero in their pockets. It was promoting "The Wall, the feel-good show of the summer." I think all those losers would disagree. What, it's been three weeks in a row now of zero winners? Or maybe four. They are starting to run together.

I was rooting for Mitch this episode, although Exodus was okay. Exodus just fit the classic big-and-muscle-bound stereotype for this competition (you know, built like The Rock, ha ha.) I would have rooted for Mitch even without his (heartbreaking) backstory. He's a good-looking (translation: hot) guy, so nice eye candy. I was TOTALLY rooting for the Captain during Mount Olympus. He's amazing to me, he looks like some common bean-pole dude, yet he's a monster and ROCKS the course. Yes, I have a preference for swimmer bodies. For the women competitors, I liked the winemaker better for some reason, and the gone sister had nothing to do with it. They really milked that, but *hand wave* whatever. For the final challenge, I had no fav between the winemaker and the fire fighter. I think the winemaker won, but I am not sure since it didn't matter that much to me. What I did notice is that the tie-ans competed on the moun-ain during that last challenge. So much UGH to that horrid announcer. Does he have blackmail on Dwayne? I see no other way he got a job announcing when he can't pronounce simple words that have Ts in them.

Sorry all you players ("player" is a compliment in this context) that I haven't posted the results or the winners yet in the Season 36 Contest. Life has pretty much sucked the life out of me lately. But know all will be posted, and prize winners announced, courtesy of my Magic Cottage Cheese container drawing. Yes, there are real and very tangible prizes. All of you are in the running for one, and just so ya'll know, I am not eligible or that Booby Prize would be MINE. ALL MINE!

... that have to include a bunch of tricks or they are sent home.

I thought for sure the show was going to troll us with Ryan's puppy-abandoning interview story, but instead it decided to troll the players with that football category. I didn't think it was so hilarious or even funny since I detest football with the heat of a zillion suns, although I do know Landry coached the Cowboys. Sometimes I can't avoid even things I hate. TPTB sure like to chat it up though. I guess any publicity is good publicity. I even had to like Ryan a LITTLE bit for not knowing anything about that stupid sport. Strange that other categories that go entirely unanswered are never publicized. But football? Blasphemy that everyone doesn't kneel at the feet of that god. Yeah, I'm cranky today.

I spent this episode wondering why Patterson decided to get extra-long skank hair extensions. Is her next assignment on The Bachelor? Her new four-foot-long hair is a pre-requisite for getting cast on that show. I guess I'm dwelling on hair since when Jane came on screen, I couldn't hear anything she said, I just stared at that black stuff on her head. The posts above are the reason I even tune in, casual as that is this season. Thanks, posters!

This applies to some of this season's AGT acts. https://www.theonion.com/traveling-contortionist-excited-to-get-off-the-road-and-1844083045

So much this. I am now judging reactions and pre-determining which dancers will get a no based on how much they squee or don't squee when they see The Fabulous Judges. And speaking of, did you know Derek is going to play Vegas, and JLo played there too? For some reason, that private conversation got broadcast to the world. Only Ne-Yo is not annoying. But now I wonder if he has ever been seen or photographed without some hat or cap. Is he bald or have a big head tat or something? That's starting to irk me too. I found this episode depressing and a downer after the first fun group, the French geometry dancers. After that, the judges were hating on everyone, and their bad mood rubbed off on this viewer. I did NOT enjoy this episode at all. I might skip a week or two if I can find something else to do.

Lightning might strike me, but I say yes, strapless is in her contract, and so is sitting next to Simon so he can look over and down. Sofia's view is better than Heidi's for Simon's eyes. I did a search for sword swallowing and it appears to be real, there is an association for sword swallowers! But then again, I found "trick" swords for sale too. So my verdict on this guy is out. He's cute though, and has a good stage presence. So there's that.

I am typically doing something while tv is on, and only stop to watch certain acts (like Pinocchio guy!) so didn't even see Mom. But I will be watching her for sure on the weekend rerun. My antenna has dropped most channels and NBC is the only one it currently gets. Thanks for the tip. I will be ready for some snark come Sunday. Thank you for doing this so we don't have to. Ha ha.

The Heidi-sick thing was covered by TMZ when it happened, before the AGT season started. TMZ paps caught Howie and tried to get him to comment on Heidi's germs. He passed. WHAT? No shocked reactions and old ladies fighting off the flag hanging behind them? What ever will they do to fill the empty spots. Show an entire act? Blasphemy!

I loved the Pinocchio dancer, it was cool as heck. I'm constantly irritated, though, by the camera always switching to show judge and audience faces being grossed out when I want to see the act, not a bunch of scripted reactions. I can't wait to see Pinocchio again, it's one of my fav acts so far. Speaking of scripted audience reactions, there were those two old ladies again. I was wondering if another flag was going to unfurl behind them so they could get all in a bundle about it. Oh, wait, I guess that was in last week's script. What is the definition of "a star." Since every act is told "you are a star." WTH does that even mean. That they were stars on YouTube where the show found them and hired them to come on AGT? Luka the Deep Singer ... was he so fantastic because he was a young white guy and not an old black guy like his voice said he should be? Inquiring minds want to know. This season is really heavy on social causes, like Simon's GB. Yeah, they were fine and I'm okay with an act that is not a singer getting a GB. But the PC is getting a little heavy handed this season. Not that there's anything wrong with that. I guess. Speaking of PC, there is no way in hell the Suicide Dad Singer was going to get anything but cheers and on to the next round. No one would dare red-X him, that's for sure. Comedian Lady needed a second chance. And why did TPTB show her failed act but none of the many other acts that got through or got a red X. The programming choice on this show is so whack. Again I am reminded that Simon is an ass. Although anyone who watches this show knows that if Simon stops a singer and tells them how much they suck and go backstage and pick another song, that person is going through with glowing reviews and four YESES when he/she comes back, all hangdog, to sing again for the God Who Is Simon Cowell. Time for a new ploy, Simon. We're wise to this one. ETA: For some reason, I kept thinking the sword swallower's swords collapsed inside his mouth. Maybe it had something to do with his closing his mouth around the sword when it was drawn out, using his lips to lengthen the blade back to its full length. A real sword could have cut his lips. His act was pretty polished though. This was not his first rodeo. Or talent show.

First, on a shallow note, Usher is so good looking, I could watch a full hour of just him sitting there. And since I'm an equal-opportunity shallow person, I could also just look at Ryan, Shane and Ester for another hour. I will miss this show not being on, and hope it comes back next season. I was pleased Usher talked up how important this process is, and that he was glad he came on the show. I loved Ryan singing with the woman writer. I wish Shane and Ester would do that too, and more Singing Ryan, please. Were there four songwriters this episode? I don't remember one not being picked. I didn't have a favorite song so wasn't invested in any person to "win." But I did wonder how much of the original song was kept when I heard Usher's version with Tyga. I mean, I liked it, but I also hope the writer got some credit for any of his pieces or words left in that final version! I'm a MST3K fan, but had to look up Fatherdude. Interestingly, in pages of results, they all were referencing the guy who was on Songland. Only one link said that during one episode of MST, the gang called a zombie priest "Father Dude." So that name was/is pretty obscure.

This episode I planned to keep track of what I would have won if I were answering the questions. It wasn't much fun since these two got almost all the answers correct, and even my knowing that tram is in the Gateway Arch (I've ridden it many times, it's whack), my total still got wiped out at the end by those crazed balls that hated everyone. These two were the first pair that I really wanted to win. Both were nice, smart, and the one staying with Chris didn't resort to all the theatrics and leaping onto Chris that I hate so much. I also hate the one left on stage, if it's a woman, always wearing a slinky tight dress and mile-high high heels. I didn't actually watch, but I'm guessing this woman wasn't a stiletto wearer. But I digress. I felt horrible that these two went home with $104, but I would have torn the contract too, if I had been in the answer booth. I liked the one telling the other, the bright side was they won enough for dinner, which was pretty accurate since they probably took home about $60-70 when all was said and done. Meaning, taxes.

Of course I was depressed that my girl crush Jessie tapped out. And I was surprised the brothers were so good since they were built like freerunner/parkour guys as opposed to the big, bulky, jacked guys who were representing Central. So I was pleased to see them do well. This started out being a good episode for me, until Jessie tanked. Then I just got sad, even though the woman winner is totally awesome, and I hope she continues to do well.

Ooh, I love horses AND dancers. Let us know when it comes out so I can buy my copy. And thank goodness for that. I have never looked better. Same here. I also never saw Ken's games, except the reruns recently showed.

I watched that act twice and again on YouTube, full screen. All I can say is I guess what some people see is in the eye -- or mind -- of the beholder.

This was such a fun episode. I love Carson Kressley so much, he makes everything better, like chocolate chips in a cookie. And Laverne Cox is probably the most gorgeous woman on tv. I thought the teams all did well this game, with everyone pretty equal in knowing things. I was surprised at all the song names I didn't know though. I would have failed miserably if I had been on this episode.

I watched the rerun last night so got to see the acts I didn't or only partially saw during the first airing. I also got to hear the dialogue, which ran like this during a string of singers being sent home for BEING NERVOUS. "The nerves showed, not good to be so nervous, they were too nervous, I wish they weren't so nervous." And so on. Then the young girl from Whateverstan came out and said she was nervous. Simon replied, "Nervous is good." WTH show. Make up your mind. Then the Fat Girl came out and did her so-called dance routine. Heidi votes no, Simon yes. Howie can't make up his mind, so goes with the audience: Yes. Which brings me back to the first audition, the four guys that looked like barbershop singers but were not. Simon hated them which didn't make sense to me since no, they were NOT like "every other act," they weren't traditional barbershop, just their outfits were, and I thought they were fun and interesting. So did the audience, who were ALL rooting for them to get voted through, but no judge listened to the audience. I guess the judges only "listen to the audience" when the audience agrees with the way TPTB told the judges to vote. Then Selena the woman singer who wears clothes from the men's side of the rack, comes out. Simon says, "Let's hear your story." Not, "Let's hear you sing," or "What's your talent." No, he wants her to repeat what we just saw in the taped interview. I don't see the big deal that she likes to wear jeans and Ts instead of frilly dresses and camisoles. So do I, and I usually shop the men's rack since those Ts and sweatshirts fit better than the girl clothes do. Then, before she even starts to sing, Simon says, "I have a good feeling about you." WTH, Simon, does that even mean. But I digress. LOL that Sofia said Selena already has a famous name. Yeah, the name of a singer who was shot to death by a fan. Another LOL was Heidi giving Selena a "Big, fat YES." I wish she had given the "dancer" a "Big, fat NO" instead of just a regular no. The two magician guys were just as funny to me this time as before, if not funnier. Again, I LOL'd. I would have given them the GB. Do only singers get GBs on this show? Is it because they can't "step it up" so have to go right to the finals?

I guess we get the winning games of all the people who were in the ToC starting today, then the ToC. Which means we get Puppy Abandoner Fenster AGAIN. Is this the third or fourth time for him. And another rerun of the same ToC we just saw. I wish the show would go back some years and show older episodes, I know they have them since they rerun late nights here. But they keep showing the same newer episodes ... I'd love to see Brad Rutter's five episodes. Show, get in your time capsule and make that happen. ETA: Turns out we don't even get the final winning games of these people, just one of the games they won. Like today, we get Gilbert's third game. Makes even less sense to me.