S17.E05: Melissa

[PrincessPurrsALot]

Quote

As a child, Melissa endured a tumultuous and unstable upbringing.  As a teenager, she found a friend in crack cocaine and began a life of partying and drugs that continued until her son was born.  Eager to create a stable life for her child, Melissa went cold turkey and enrolled in nursing school.  But the good times did not last long.  Melissa fell narrowly short of graduating, and slipped back into a life of crack cocaine and heroin abuse.  Now, at 32, Melissa sells her body to support her habits and has lost custody of her son.  Her family fears that she has nothing left to live for and, without an intervention, will soon be dead.

[Empress1]

I think she's lost. Left treatment after 3 days ... I don't have a good feeling. She's very, very deep in The Life.

[Stiggs]

Oh, poor Melissa. Meeting her dad made her believe she was meant to be an addict and she just overachieved from there. Her son broke my heart. That poor kid, man. 

I had to rewind to sort out the sisters - I thought Brandy was Valarie's, so it took me a moment to realize she was only in Melissa's life for about 5 years (they said), but Melissa was 32 and met her dad at 29, which is when they found out about Brandy? Brandy sure got busy quick in the sister department - not that I fault her at all for calling "the ministry." She did the right thing, she is in a horrible position and my heart broke for her, too. My heart broke for everyone, really. I really love that the mom, who had her own truckload of issues, was at least reasonable and adult enough to put her grandson's needs over her wants. "We miss him but he's being taken care of." 

I think what struck me the most, though, was handsome Jeremy Sisto-ish Andrew getting teary, and getting visibly itchy/uncomfortable when Melissa started cooking the crack. His "Fuck!" on the elevator was well earned. But it made me wonder - if someone started cooking up crack on the US Intervention show, I cannot imagine any of the interventionists being as calm about it as Andrew was (and he's the recovering crack addict) except maybe Sylvia, and I can't imagine them "letting" her get as far as she did with it. Like I have a feeling if it was like, Ken or Candy or any of the old favorites, there might have been a crazy camera kerfluffle. I know they've let the addicts drink, but I cannot see Candy (because I know her so well, lol) let someone even START cooking up crack while she was in the room. It's interesting - I'm sure there's someone I'm missing, but I can't remember anyone actually trying to smoke crack during an intervention before.

I liked that, for the most part, the women spoke to Melissa from love and that they were mostly calm. But Melissa...I don't have a good feeling. She thinks "nothing" with kill her. She thinks she's shit. For a moment she let herself believe she was worth it - a decent man was telling her that and she wanted to believe it - but it faded so fast. Poor girl. Poor kid. Poor family. 

One more thing - the Intervention jacked brow game continues. You don't even have to be an addict. Just near one, and you just keep plucking? Why this epidemic on top of an epidemic? lol. 

[TVbitch]

Damn those BC rehab places look gorgeous. I've looked into them and they are a lot cheaper than US rehabs too. Andrew's tears got to me; he did his best but that chick was not even close to ready and she was making tons of cash, so....

[Enero]

3 hours ago, Stiggs said:

I think what struck me the most, though, was handsome Jeremy Sisto-ish Andrew getting teary, and getting visibly itchy/uncomfortable when Melissa started cooking the crack.

This made me so nervous for him, especially knowing that he is a recovering addict. He's likely been clean for a long time. Hence him being able to do this kind of work i.e. interventions, but he's still an addict and has triggers like any other addict. Seeing someone cook, and stop short of lighting up in front of him could not have been easy. I was relived when he got up and left her sitting there. 

Though Brandy has not been in Melissa's life for long I applaud her for doing what so many family members won't do a) call DFACS when they see and know that a child in their family has an addict parent who is putting them in danger and b)taking said child who is in danger into their home and providing them with a stable environment. Too many times on this show we see family members sit idle with hands in their laps heeming and hawing about their family member who is an addict and destroying their child/children's lives, but they fail to step in.  I also liked the fact that there wasn't much enabling going on from the family. Likely because Melissa supported her habit with prostitution and the sex cams. Her sisters and mother spoke to her in love, but made it very clear that she was not welcome around their children etc., if she wasn't clean, which was refreshing to see.

Lastly, I felt bad for Melissa's family. However, I just couldn't feel much sympathy for her. I'm sure she is in pain, but I don't know. I can't explain it but she seemed way too self aware, liked the camera too much. Also, it was obvious that she did not want to get well, that she wanted to wallow in her drugs and angst. Therefore I'm not surprised at all that she left treatment after three days. 

[theajw]

I think that Andrew is my favorite interventionist of either the Canadian or American flavors of this show.  

Agreed that Melissa wasn't ready.  Bailing three days into rehab was sadly not a twist ending.  

[Lemonemm]

3 hours ago, theajw said:

I think that Andrew is my favorite interventionist of either the Canadian or American flavors of this show.  

He was AMAZING in this episode. He and Seth (U.S.) are my current favourites. There was another one with Andrew reading a letter at the intervention from the addict's young son. He straight up cried, sobs and all - no embarrassment, just emotion. He cares a lot and kids are his soft spot I think.

4 hours ago, Enero said:

This made me so nervous for him, especially knowing that he is a recovering addict. He's likely been clean for a long time. Hence him being able to do this kind of work i.e. interventions, but he's still an addict and has triggers like any other addict. Seeing someone cook, and stop short of lighting up in front of him could not have been easy. I was relived when he got up and left her sitting there. 

That was super intense. I literally breathed a sigh of relief when he left the room. He seemed to really care about her - I'm sure he was sad to hear she left treatment.

[cynicat]

23 hours ago, Enero said:

Lastly, I felt bad for Melissa's family. However, I just couldn't feel much sympathy for her. I

I too could not muster up a ton of sympathy for her, and I don't know why.  I kept waiting to care and am a bit worried that I'm getting jaded.  

[Scorpiosunshine]

I'm chiming in to say that I feel like most of you all do.

I knew she was going to leave treatment. I've been surprised a time or two, but I think it was sadly, painfully obvious that she wasn't going to last. 

My sympathies were squarely with Melissa's son. I kept thinking that I hope that this doesn't mess him up for life. The addict cycle is all too real and quite complicated, but hopefully the family sticks to their bottom lines and keeps kiddo away from addict-Mom.  As he gets older, it's going to more on him to do that rather than on the family. That could get tricky.  He deserves his shot at a healthy, happy life. 

When Andrew left the room after Melissa started with the crack, I thought that was the best thing he could have done.  I wanted to strangle Melissa when she basically gave no fucks about Andrew being in recovery.  She could have walked into the hall or a bathroom. No, it wasn't the worst of her "sins", but still.  I'm so glad Andrew walked out and went to get Melissa's boyfriend. 

Agreed that Andrew rocks! I just love and adore him. His 'fuck!" in the elevator, his genuine emotions, his honesty ...he is real but not overwrought.  I always want to give HIM a hug, too. And yes, he looks like Jeremy Sisto-- that is a delight to my eyes since most everything else on this show is so fucking ugly.

[pasdetrois]

Melissa is too fond of flouncing around in her high-heeled boots - complete with stylish dagger placed just so - to take sobriety seriously. She's nowhere near ready to confront her demons. Her sisters also appeared to enjoy the cameras.

Melissa makes a lot of money but she owes money to a lot of drug dealers. Maybe the leap from crack to fentanyl, plus all those motel rooms, gobble up her money?

I wondered about Brax - one minute he's getting high and prostituting, the next he's being asked to help Andrew corral Melissa into rehab. He just kind of goes with the flow, I guess. At least when he and Melissa are prostituting together she's a little more safe.

I hope the family keeps Colby far away from Melissa, whose most visible emotion was self-centered: her sister reported her to the authorities. She doesn't appear to miss her child at all. She simply views him as an object that her mean family is withholding.

[Stiggs]

50 minutes ago, pasdetrois said:

I wondered about Brax - one minute he's getting high and prostituting, the next he's being asked to help Andrew corral Melissa into rehab. He just kind of goes with the flow, I guess. At least when he and Melissa are prostituting together she's a little more safe.

I think Brax liked that someone was asking him to do something good - that he liked that non-junkie people were asking him to do something, counting on him. I don't know how many times Brax has been in the clink but he might just have done what he was told because he's used to that? For some reason, the thing that struck me the most about him was his stress over his shirt being wrinkled before they hooked together, heh. Anyway, Brax seemed like he might have a good heart, and maybe he wanted rehab, too, and thought he could get it that way? I dunno. Or maybe he was just mesmerized by Andrew's voice, lol. 

[Lemonemm]

16 hours ago, Stiggs said:

I think Brax liked that someone was asking him to do something good - that he liked that non-junkie people were asking him to do something, counting on him. I don't know how many times Brax has been in the clink but he might just have done what he was told because he's used to that?

YES. This. I couldn't put my finger on it, but that's what stood out to me, too. Also, he totally reminded me of Dylan on Modern Family.

16 hours ago, Stiggs said:

I dunno. Or maybe he was just mesmerized by Andrew's voice, lol. 

I'm not gonna lie - I'd go just about anywhere with that guy/voice. ;-)

Maybe I need to acquire a serious drug habit... 

[PityFree]

On 9/1/2017 at 6:08 AM, pasdetrois said:

*Snip*
I wondered about Brax - one minute he's getting high and prostituting, the next he's being asked to help Andrew corral Melissa into rehab. He just kind of goes with the flow, I guess. At least when he and Melissa are prostituting together she's a little more safe.
*snip*

 I kept wondering about Brax also. I was disappointed that there wasn't a surprise offer of rehab to him also once Melissa had said yes. 

[cynicat]

16 hours ago, PityFree said:

 I kept wondering about Brax also. I was disappointed that there wasn't a surprise offer of rehab to him also once Melissa had said yes. 

I think Brax would have had a better chance than Melissa.  He was so willing to help Melissa and I wonder if that was his own cry for help.

[gonecrackers]

Maybe she also would've taken it more seriously had they offered Brax his own chance at recovery; couldn't have hurt & maybe at least one would've succeeded.

[Neurochick]

Brandy should have told Melissa, "I took your kid because you're a fucking junkie.  So get off the drugs, go to NA, it's fucking free."  

Not a nice thing to say, I know; but Melissa thinks drugs will keep her from feeling, and that's just not true.  There will come a time when no drug will work for her.  

I wonder though if one of her mother's boyfriends did something bad to Melissa, like molested or raped her.

Edited September 4, 2017 by Neurochick

[Stiggs]

On 9/2/2017 at 1:08 AM, Lemonemm said:

I'm not gonna lie - I'd go just about anywhere with that guy/voice. ;-)

Maybe I need to acquire a serious drug habit... 

My husband believes I have an addiction to Amazon Prime. I wonder if that would be enough? :) 

On 9/3/2017 at 8:05 AM, cynicat said:

I think Brax would have had a better chance than Melissa.  He was so willing to help Melissa and I wonder if that was his own cry for help.

I agree. And I've been telling myself they offered him treatment and just didn't include it in the show. I'm assuming they had to have offered him something - unless his time in jail got him clean? I feel like we need a follow up on Brax, heh. 

[jrlr]

21 hours ago, Neurochick said:

Brandy should have told Melissa, "I took your kid because you're a fucking junkie.  So get off the drugs, go to NA, it's fucking free."  

Not a nice thing to say, I know; but Melissa thinks drugs will keep her from feeling, and that's just not true.  There will come a time when no drug will work for her.  

I wonder though if one of her mother's boyfriends did something bad to Melissa, like molested or raped her.

From Melissa's repeated "I'm in so much pain" claims I think the drugs have stopped working for her, other than to keep her from going through withdrawals.  She is one of the least sympathetic addicts I have ever seen on this show - so self-aware that she knows exactly how to dress and look and act for hooking and online porn, but so self-pitying and deluded with the usual "I love my child more than anything in the world."  No, Melissa, you love drugs (and the spotlight) more than anything in the world.

As for her having been molested by one of pathetic-weakling-enabling mom's boyfriends, I'd say it's a given.  I guess I've been watching this show for too long to not assume that.

[mythoughtis]

So Melissa gets herself expelled from high school just before graduation.  and then later drops out of nursing school just before graduation. She leaves treatment after 3 days.  There is a pattern there. 

She refers to beginning drugs as ' meeting' them as if she's in a relationship with an intelligent life form. Meanwhile she has lost her son, the best intelligent life form in her life. 

what the hell is Brandy doing with Colby?  There wasn't a better spot for him? She doesn't strike me as a stable person herself.  She seems to be overly 'excited' to be on tv  and overly happy to be derogatory about her nephews' grandmother. She also seems to love bragging about the fact she has Colby and Melissa doesn't.  

Exactly what  is it that Melissa doesn't want to 'feel' ( that was her stated reason for being an addict.). She strikes me as being a natural actress. And loves any excuse to get high. 

i think Brax might have been offered a spot if he had seemed to have been that important in her life earlier. I don't think they realized how dependent she was on him until the actual intervention. 

I hope Andrew didn't relapse after this. 

Edited September 22, 2017 by mythoughtis

[FREE THINKER]

Thank God for Brandy to take care of the child!

[kateisgr3at]

This episode made me so sad...and my heart broke when I read that she quit treatment after 3 days. I hope so badly she can get the help she needs before it kills her. :'(

[kateisgr3at]

On 9/21/2017 at 8:35 PM, mythoughtis said:

what the hell is Brandy doing with Colby?  There wasn't a better spot for him? She doesn't strike me as a stable person herself.  She seems to be overly 'excited' to be on tv  and overly happy to be derogatory about her nephews' grandmother. She also seems to love bragging about the fact she has Colby and Melissa doesn't.  

I think she got Colby because she was the one who called and she was an actual family member. Her mom wouldn't have been able to take him because Melissa lives with her, and her other sister had a few kids of her own, so I'm thinking they asked Brandy because it was convenient maybe? Idk how it works in Canada. 

 

I disagree that she came off as unstable and "braggy" about having Colby...nor did I feel like she was excited to be on TV. Personally, she came off to me as the most well-rounded of the bunch, and I felt like she was really sincere when she spoke to Melissa about Colby and how much she wanted her to get better. I don't remember her speaking badly about Melissa's mom.