S01.E05: Everyday Life

[StayingAfterSunday]

Re:  Doug and Jamie.  From the first episode I thought Doug had something that might be described as "sex appeal."  The more I see of him on each episode the better he appears - in every way.  I suspect Jamie is going to do a full turn-around on her original negative reaction to Doug and she is going to fall for him big time. 

 

I actually have hope that Doug's mother and Jamie will forge a connection.  So far we haven't seen a whole lot of Doug's sister.  Sometimes marrying into a family in which the mother and sisters are thickasthieves can make the new wife feel like she's being ganged up on by the women in the family, especially if she thinks they're gossiping about her.  Doug only has the one sister and from what I've seen she doesn't come off as catty or unkind.  Well, Jamie, it could be worse: Doug could have three sisters AND his mother.  Count yourself lucky.

 

With respect to Cortney and Jason:  I, too, wondered just what and how much time goes into caring for his sick mother?  Here along long I'd thought he actually lived with his mother, but I thought Jason was explaining to Cortney that he and his mother lived down the street from each other in Brooklyn.

Regardless, these two look compatible, not just on paper, but in the real world.

 

Ahhh.  Vaughn and Monet. Monet has seemed fond of saying,  "My husband." 

Unfortunately, her husband would rather say,   "My space."

I can see why Vaughn is disappointed, just as I can understand why Monet is sooo confused.

Even though they're only a week or so "in,"  Monet is trying to relate to Vaughn as though they've known each other for much longer, and is trying to make her mannerisms and way of speaking fit that premise.  For instance, during their discussion on how to approach finances-- jointly or individually: When Vaughn carefully expressed his thoughts, Monet just impressed me as snotty, almost, with her short, clipped reply:  "If you want to pay ALL of the bills that's okay, too."  She is no more tactful than he is. 

 

I get the feeling that Vaughn is one of those moody, ultra sensitive (mostly about himself) men who needs someone who is deeper than Monet; I'm guessing he'd do better with a more serious, but conversational female, who is also somewhat moody and who craves alone time. 

 

 

 

 

 

[trimthatfat]

Vaughn is a passive aggressive a-hole.  He clearly isn't attracted to Monet, but instead of coming right out and admitting it, he is choosing to make her despise him, instead.  This way, she will most definitely want a divorce.   I think when he said, "we should cook like this at home; and by we, I mean you", it caught her off guard, but then when he suggested the ménage a trois, she seemed to be trying really hard to keep her emotions in check .  I have a feeling if the cameras weren't there, she would have gone off on him. 

 

Exactly. Monet was not checking out of the relationship as quickly as Vaughn wanted. She wanted to hold hands, she wanted him to meet her friends, and she seemed quite disappointed when he said he was going back home. Vaughn is trying to get rid of her by trying to see which buttons he can push, and it's working. It's an extremely immature tactic. I also find it quite offensive that he thinks Monet is good enough for sex and nothing else.

 

I said this before, but I believe that on paper, they are a match. However, it's not working because I think Vaughn is purposefully sabotaging what could be by being an ass. I had a couple of ex-bfs criticize me and tell me that I am too independendent, too head-strong, too driven (heh), and then I met my husband. In a very traditional sense, I defer to him as the head of my home. I would not be like that with my ex's...there's just something about my husband that makes me want to nurture him in a traditional sense. Therefore, despite Monet being very independent-minded, I believe with the right man, she will welcome the traditional roles she claimed she wanted in the beginning of this process. Vaughn is not the man for her. He does not want a traditional relationship in the way Monet wants one - he wants someone who will just do as he wants and that's that.

 

The way Monet was in the car ride back - quiet, keeping to herself - was pretty telling to me. I think she realized then that there was no fixing that relationship.

Edited August 8, 2014 by trimthatfat

[eyetotelescope]

I'm surprised to see Jamie warming up to Doug after all. I wouldn't call it "slowly" since it's only been 2 weeks!

 

"Slowly" is of course relative on this show, considering how quickly Jason/Cortney seemed to warm up to each other!

[ketose]

Maybe Vaughn is setting us up for an episode where he breaks down and cries like a baby and tells Monet all about his problems. Then they end up the most stable couple. Or I just wrote that to amuse myself.

[absolutelyido]

Re:  Doug and Jamie.  From the first episode I thought Doug had something that might be described as "sex appeal."  The more I see of him on each episode the better he appears - in every way.  I suspect Jamie is going to do a full turn-around on her original negative reaction to Doug and she is going to fall for him big time.

 

I've always thought Doug was cute. From the beginning he reminded me of Anthony Edwards (Dr. Greene on ER).When he hasn't shaved, and has his shirt off, I think he's downright sexy. Plus he seems so comfortable with himself without being full of himself (confident but not cocky) which is very appealing.

 

As far as physical attraction, I think Jamie is completely over her initial reaction to him, a lot of which I think was just her being scared about the situation in general. All of the participants were scared, but given Jamie's background, I think she may have seen men treat women in a way that the other women haven't. So she was actually scared of this man she didn't know in a way that the other women were not. She's said she never saw a healthy relationship when she was growing up, and that she doesn't trust easily. So, I think a lot of her 'don't touch me' reaction wasn't because she wasn't attracted to him, but because she didn't trust him.

 

Ironically, of all the couples, to me Doug & Jamie's body language shows the most physical attraction. Monet and Vaughn are usually sitting on opposite ends of the couch. Jason and Courtney generally sit right next to each other holding hands, or with their hands on each other's thighs. Jamie & Doug are more all over each other. I noticed it particularly when they were in her apartment discussing where to live. She was leaned against him; he had his arm around her and his thigh across hers. He's always picking her up and carrying her; and now she's started wearing his clothes. Yeah, I think Jamie is well on her way to falling for him big time.

 

I think when Doug's family watches these episodes they'll be surprised how into Doug Jamie is at this point. At lunch, Doug's brother asked him if he was still walking on eggshells around her, and they all acknowledge that his mother doesn't think Jamie is genuine or sincere. At this point, I think his whole family is afraid that Jamie may be just going through the motions for the camera, will bail when the filming is done, and Doug will get hurt. Because they haven't really seen them together, they haven't seen that Jamie really does care for and is attracted to him now.

Edited August 8, 2014 by absolutelyido

[ExMathMajor]

My sister and I were predicting how this should end.

 

• Doug and Jamie: Should divorce, but keep dating to see what happens
• Cortney and Jason: Should stay married a little longer
• Vaughan and Monet: Should divorce and never see each other again, not even for sex

 

Re Doug's family "situation": For the first time I actually feel a little sorry for Jamie. From what little I've learned, her upbringing has her simultaneously longing for and fearing closer contact with a (potential) mate and his family. Perhaps more than anyone else she realizes that this is a reality experiment and that the experiment is going to end at some point so she fears getting too invested.

 

Maybe I'm just old (-fashioned) for even mentioning this, but have either Jamie or Doug's mom heard of the phone? Surely there's some point in the 24-hour day when they're both awake at the same time and can talk to each other for 5 minutes or so. Alternately, as someone said above, they could wait until the 5 (?) weeks have passed and then perhaps Jamie can get to know Doug's family better.

[RubyWoo72]

Monet is naturally pretty but she was really working that cute haircut and red lipstick at dinner. I agree with the poster who said the burlesque dancer looks much better with less makeup. Jamie is also very attractive but needs to throw those eyelashes away. They're not necessary/ too dark and severe.

[SnarkKitty]

I was wondering ... rather than being an asshole, perhaps Vaughn was trying to be funny and lighten things up, expecting Monet to banter back with him? He did seem kind of excited about having her in Jersey, wanting her to see his town and be in his space for a while. It actually improved his mood, to where he was all about the weekend and plans and she was "'Meh. See you , yeah, Friday."

 

Instead, she reacted to his comments very seriously. And I'll give you he can be a jerk, but I don't for a minute believe he was trying to get her to agree to threesomes on camera like that, knowing each other for just a couple of weeks. The "by us I mean you cook this" I took as semi-joke too, like, if you say "okay" then cool, you're cooking for me, and if you say "Ninja please" oh well, I took a shot. The only part I thought he was serious about was the Naked Weekend, and hell, sounded like a plan to me! He said get some food in, lots of water and don't get dressed all week. Vaughn, you smooth talker, you. In my house we call it laying up and yes Monet, sometimes we plan it especially when we've had a busy few weeks and it's fun to look forward to. 

[Ohwell]

You might be right about Vaughn.  I did find it strange that he would discuss on television having a threesome.  However, I can understand Monet not knowing if he was serious or not, since she barely knows him.  He might have been joking about the other things as well, but perhaps he shouldn't have said them publically.  I agree that Naked Weekend sounded like a plan though. ; )

Edited August 10, 2014 by Ohwell

[SistaLadybug]

Yeah, I was kinda like, "Shoot ... Naked Weekend sounds like my favorite kinda weekend!"  That said, Vaughn doesn't have any idea of how to read a room.  That girl does not trust him and he's said and done some jerkish things.  They need to get to a point of affection and lightheartedness before he can pull out stuff like that, whether he's serious or not.  This is the same man who didn't want to hold her hand because he didn't think she was paying enough attention to him, but now after they've had a big blow-up, he thinks it's a good idea to suggest a whole weekend of fucking?  Come on, bruh.

[ketose]

I was wondering ... rather than being an asshole, perhaps Vaughn was trying to be funny and lighten things up, expecting Monet to banter back with him? He did seem kind of excited about having her in Jersey, wanting her to see his town and be in his space for a while. It actually improved his mood, to where he was all about the weekend and plans and she was "'Meh. See you , yeah, Friday."

 

Instead, she reacted to his comments very seriously. And I'll give you he can be a jerk, but I don't for a minute believe he was trying to get her to agree to threesomes on camera like that, knowing each other for just a couple of weeks. The "by us I mean you cook this" I took as semi-joke too, like, if you say "okay" then cool, you're cooking for me, and if you say "Ninja please" oh well, I took a shot. The only part I thought he was serious about was the Naked Weekend, and hell, sounded like a plan to me! He said get some food in, lots of water and don't get dressed all week. Vaughn, you smooth talker, you. In my house we call it laying up and yes Monet, sometimes we plan it especially when we've had a busy few weeks and it's fun to look forward to. 

I think Vaughn might believe that's what he was doing, but he has to be able to relay that to Monet. It's funny, because Doug does some of the same thing, only in a much more muted way. He jokes about how Jamie is completely into him and he won't just let her have sex with him at a moment's notice. I think those two either have the best senses of humor or their personalities are more compatible. Cortney and Jason seem really traditional. They seem like the kind of people who could be set up by their families.

[trimthatfat]

Yeah, I was kinda like, "Shoot ... Naked Weekend sounds like my favorite kinda weekend!"  That said, Vaughn doesn't have any idea of how to read a room.  That girl does not trust him and he's said and done some jerkish things.  They need to get to a point of affection and lightheartedness before he can pull out stuff like that, whether he's serious or not.  This is the same man who didn't want to hold her hand because he didn't think she was paying enough attention to him, but now after they've had a big blow-up, he thinks it's a good idea to suggest a whole weekend of fucking?  Come on, bruh.

 

Exactly. They're married, but they've known each other two weeks at this point. They are essentially dating. If I were in my 2nd week of dating someone and he suggested a threesome, I wouldn't find that very funny either. He doesn't know Monet's sense of humor and she doesn't know his. Thus far, Vaughn only seems excited about the physical aspect of their relationship. He's been cold/odd since their honeymoon...of course she's not receptive to him or his jokes at this point.

 

I've said this before, but Vaughn's communication skills suck. They really do. He has no idea how to talk to Monet and doesn't seem interested in trying to figure it out.

[StayingAfterSunday]

Well, evidently he's going to try to figure it all out.  I saw on his twitter that he just bought that book, "Men are from Mars; Women are from Venus..." 

And I agree:  Vaughn was throwing some deadpan humor her way, looking for a reaction.  Well, he got one alright, but it was the "stone-cold silent treatment," a strategy that is not particularly productive in any relationship, yet one that can drive the other person CRAZY(IER). 

 

Of course, it could be that Monet was in shock, but I still tend to think those comments were planned out -- by someone.  Either Vaughn himself and/or with producers.  It seems a little coincidental that the show got a renewal for next season right after Vaughn's mind-blowing remarks.  That episode aired right in the middle of the season so I would imagine the network was anxious to get their dog in the race now and come out a winner.   It still strikes me as unfair, though, if that is the case because whether it was contrived or not, and whether the remarks were spoken in jest or not, Monet still seemed totally taken aback and offended.  

 

Someone in another thread asked if there had been anything shown or said about Vaughn's mother.  I am very anxious to know more about her, too, and Vaughn's relationship with her growing up.   She was shown at Vaughn's family dinner shortly before their wedding as well as a brief shot of her sitting down during the wedding, but I don't remember much else.  All I know is that Monet, when being interviewed by Sister2Sister Mag. spoke briefly about Vaughn's mother, and even said that she (Monet) thinks she looks like Vaughn's mother.  From the little bit I saw of her on the wedding episode I would have to agree that they are basically the same "type," at least appearance-wise.  The real question is:  Are they similar in any way personality-wise... And how did Vaughn and his mother relate to one another? I thought it was interesting -- and, yes, admirable - that he left home to join the Air Force (?) or some branch of the military when he was just 17 years old. 

 

 

 

S

[silversage]

When they all got married they didn't know anything about each other and didn't know what they'd be taking on. I know it's important to Doug and his family their softball games but to keep harping on Jamie that she should be there just bugs me. She probably had to take time off from work for the wedding and honeymoon. Now she's expected to take time off or work her schedule to be at those games. Maybe her job is important to her. If the marriage doesn't work out I bet she'd like to still have her job.

[aradia22]

OK, "experts," come off it. You need to stop with the 'we found them their ideal matches' and 'it's up to them to make it work' like you went out and of all the people in the world you found 100% perfect matches and if things don't work out it's the participants' fault. 

[walnutqueen]

OK, "experts," come off it. You need to stop with the 'we found them their ideal matches' and 'it's up to them to make it work' like you went out and of all the people in the world you found 100% perfect matches and if things don't work out it's the participants' fault. 

 

While you're at it, quit posing as "experts".  You are TV whore shills.

[ketose]

I have to say I prefer the thin veneer of higher purpose even if the show doesn't really have one. Back in the day, Big Brother was considered a kind of social experiment. Now it's a never ending episode of Mean Girls with some Double Dare stunts thrown in. I rewatched the casting special and it was interesting to see they had a lot of reasons to put other couples that didn't make the show together. They even had Jamie and Jason paired together. I think they even had Vaughn and a really traditional girl matched together.

 

I think it might have been more interesting to see what particular characteristics made each couple a good match. Obviously, they don't need to reveal deep psychological secrets or anything. As far as this "perfect match" idea, it's just not possible. It's like predicting the weather, similar patterns tend to predict future results. You look at what seems to work for couples in general and try to reapply it to other couples. I think things like proximity are a much better determination of who gets together.

[absolutelyido]

I think it might have been more interesting to see what particular characteristics made each couple a good match. Obviously, they don't need to reveal deep psychological secrets or anything.

 

I would like to see that too, they really only spent a couple of minutes saying why they matched each of the couples together. I am still hoping either in the last episode or the reunion show they talk more about what clicked between the couples as they expected, and what didn't work (e.g. the train wreck that is Monet & Vaughn).