Lantern7

It's funny Sam did a bit on the president and golf. i just finished reading Commander in Cheat: How Golf Explains Trump by Rick Reilly. Great book, unless you want to avoid getting angry at that guy some more. Basically, he is the worst everywhere, including on the links. Sam should have back the bus over Rudy Giuliani some more. What a creep he is. I don't think she could top the time he was incoherent on a morning show. The display showed the time being "9:12," and Sam quipped that he usually faded "after nine-eleven." Nastiest thing she said, and that was the episode she referred to Ivanka as a "feckless c**t." But hey, Rudy deserves it.

How often does that happen? I mean, when a team gets a number of runs and hits that corresponds to the date the game was played. Gotta be a few times a year, right?

As much as I can heap insults upon Bear, "crybaby" isn't one of them. Speaking of the ursine asshole . . . how much you wanna bet he's gonna brag about "converting" Laurel? I'm still mad. As much as Wes kept running his mouth and showing off his petard, last night was pretty much the worst possible case coming true.

He’s basically Laurel’s property now, and she’ll rent him out to Johnny and Bear. Punishing Laurel would be a lot tougher. I can’t think of any Proving Ground where she wouldn’t have — at worst — even odds. She’s a physical threat, she’s not a dummy, and she only lost to Camila in IOTC because she was supposedly too hurt to compete in that finale. And if the US throws her in and she wins, she defects to the UK. Her cuddling up to Bear is basically the diarrhea on the shit cake that is this season. ETA: Had to fix a pronoun.

Nicole ain’t lookin’ too bad now, huh? At this point, I’m rooting for CT to go out in a blaze of glory, winning his third title along with Turbo. I know CT and Wes aren’t tight-tight, but I can imagine a mournful CT standing alone at night, pouring a bottle out for his Rivals 2 homie.

Without spoiling tonight's episode . . . how brutal was the ending for you guys? I'm putting it on the same level as Beth dragging Ruthie through the sand in Gauntlet 2. I am that irate. I know it's stupid, but it's true.

Fuck you, Laurel. I try to think well of her. I try to paint her as decent even as I called her "KIllbot." Well, the Killbot has a virus, and Wes paid the price. Yeah, I know that I compare Wes to Wile E. Coyote often because he probably considers himself a "Soooooper Genius!!!" I know he treats people he doesn't need like dirt. But what happened? Killbot put an idea in Krybaby's head. They override the will of their team, sending Wes in to face Bear. And fucking Bear wins, because apparently WOTW1 was too good, and the scales needed balancing. So now Bear is still in the game, he and Laurel can do whatever a Killbot and human slime do behind closed doors, and Johnny will have to sleep on his back because the erection he possesses makes that the only non-painful position. Fuck you, Laurel. Fuck you, Josh. Fuck you, Bear. Fuck you, Georgia, for that last dig at Wes. And fuck you, TJ, for going to Zach first for his vote.He fucking knew what would happen. Well, Wes is gone. He's full of himself, but he was way better than most of these assholes, and now he's gone. Fuck everybody. Honestly, the UK blows a win when locks get pulled off the wheel (both by Theo?), and Killbot and Krybaby take it upon themselves to negate the gift. And honestly, who the fuck needs anybody from Big Brother? They're all clowns. At least Paulie makes the halfhearted attempt to try and wipe the greasepaint off. Fuck off, Josh. Take your box of Kleenex and fucking GO. And now, we get Bear wanking off for two solid episodes. Yaaaaaaaaaaaayyyy. Fuck BMP for importing that wanker. "Grisly Bear" is more apt for him. Fuck everybody. Fuck myself for watching. FUCK. ETA: Fuck Johnny, just because If he wins a seventh title, I would be all for Wes to buy his house and put him out on the street.

Two quick teasers:

Two bits of news. One: DBS finale and marathon on September 28. Two: second season of One-Punch Man starts on October 12.

I don't think Sandra has an enlarged ego . . . though that is what I tell myself. I also think Rob isn't too bad in real life, but I'll probably be calling him an overrated jackass by the third episode (at the latest).

I'm thinking three minutes was too long. The field could have been narrowed down if thirty seconds were subtracted. There were a few that stopped to catch their breath . . . and if someone does that on a Stage other than Three, that's not right. Also, if Snap Back hadn't been used, we probably wouldn't have double-digit ninjas going into Stage Three, even with Safety Passes.

How does one defend trophy hunting with a straight face? Even if there’s overpopulation (which probably never happens), you’d still come off as a prick. Also, you’d be on the same side as DJ and Eric. Nobody with a moral compass and an IQ above 60 wants that. Great piece from Dulce. “Chipping” people feels all sorts of wrong. Also: what would a Danny DeVito beach towel look like?

I don't use Twitter . . . but I figure that if you're on a stage like that and you're ripping into someone, you should have the decency to tag them, so that they know they're being ripped. Perhaps the president figured John would tell Chrissy. "Hey, babe. The president tweeted about me. It wasn't good." "Did he mention me?" "Wow, funny you should ask . . . " Dang, how small is "Jay-Why-Dubs"? Jaboukie looks like he could be sent places while crammed in a duffel bag.

I don't think it's any of them, purely because their "stories" would have been pushed harder upon us if they were to go all the way. Has RJ Roman ever had a run that wasn't WWWA? I'm not being mean, but I reckon he's been swept under the rug more often than he's been showcased. The push factor leads me to believe the champ will be Drew or Daniel. How old is Daniel? With that hair, he could be 45, and I would be none the wiser. Right now, I'm thinking he's under 30. His exposure probably would make people think he's older. Having a protege in Kid Owadhi would add to that.

Article in the latest Sports Illustrated on the Polar Bear from Flushing. Wait, there’s no polar bear emoticon? Crap. @mojoween . . . dang. Hear that, @Moose135? I think Lindsey Nelson is coming back to life just to get that jacket.

Hail to the Queen. Yeah, Sandra isn’t as flashy as Rob, and her strategy to win both times was basically “stay out of the bullets’ path.” But she gives insanely good interviews and doesn’t suffer fools gladly. If you don’t put her on the short list of greatest players, consider this: she had to spend 38 straight days with Jon Dalton, and 39 with Russell Hantz. The fact that she did not murder either of them qualifies her for Survivor Sainthood. Fun fact: Sandra is only one of three players worldwide to have two titles. Granted, other nations might not endlessly recycle players like Burnett/Probst, but I still think that’s impressive.

Reality Blurred on S39 details. Needless to say, Andy isn’t impressed.

AV Club's Wiki Wormhole focuses . . . on worms. Includes a paragraph on Mr. Mind.

Because he wins the whole thing. That's more of an educated guess than a spoiler . . . it's a toss-up between him and Daniel Gil as to which has the biggest "name" in ANW. Daniel's run was just about flawless, and he only needed goggles to get through the final obstacle. Turns out his hair looks great wet as well as dry. I'm sure he'll have at least three production aides drying that hair because he returns to Stage Three. Still, I'm thinking Drew will be revealed as the second American Ninja Warrior. Well, Isaac Caldiero missed a buzzer in the Regional Final, but his win still holds up. Meanwhile, Geoff Britten hit all six buzzers, and he's seldom mentioned as being one of only two ninjas to clear all four stages. I still think a "Ninja Seeks Kunochi" dating series with Grant McCartney would work if the episodes are limited in number. And, once again, how would that be ANY worse than anything from The Bachelor franchise? I will say that the new obstacles looked intimidating as hell. I guess notes were shared about Snap Back. If that hadn't been brought out in a Regional Final, I'm thinking we wouldn't have as many people going for Stage Three.

Drew Dreschel is Ninja #20 to clear Stage Two. That's out of 27 (with Daniel Gil awaiting his run). That's about 75 percent of competitors passing. The question: was this Stage Two too easy? I don't think it was . . . but 20/27, with a potential 21/28.

"And you're going to Stage Three! And YOU'RE going to Stage Three! And YOU'RE going to Stage Three! EVERYBODY IS GOING TO STAGE THREEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!" Hey, they earned it, but I'm thinking next season's Stage Two will involve snipers. Also: plugged-in appliances at the water obstacle."

I'll have to watch this again I DVRed it, but I lost 7-8 minutes for some reason. Hoover Deuce was an undercover agent? That tracks. The montage with God on his hog after bailing out of Heaven was funny. "Why the Dalmatian fetish suit? Because shut up, that's why!" Fiore offering Jesse the job also felt fitting. I'm guessing those were angels in the throne room. Jesse probably thought they were part of some weird Roman sex cult, but he was too polite to ask. Oh, good, Humperdoo's back. And he's holed up at a unbelievably Orthodox synagogue in Williamsburg. Why not? At least viewers unfamiliar with the borough of Brooklyn got a better impression than from Benny Bensonhurst: Amateur Mohel. I'm guessing he gets a shiny new mouth in three weeks. 🤷‍♂️

How would following Grant be any worse than watching The Bachelor? You wouldn't need a shot of penicillin just watching him. Oops, he just wiped out on Salmon Ladder

We might get double-digit competitors running Stage Three. Is that better or worse than 2-3?

Good question. They can hear him in the Regionals, since they have no time limit. ("I see you! I see you!!!" "And I see you too, Akbar!") I'm thinking ninjas train themselves to tune out everything in Las Vegas, including Akbar. I get that . . . but Adam Rayl did clear the Stage with plenty of time to spare and with a little panache. Apparently, that beats "awesomely enthusiastic mother."