Lantern7

Well, Jordan's in the running for the win. And he's insufferable. I mean I can't blame him. Tori didn't even need to swim. She could have just pulled his pants down, fashioned a sail on the shaft, and let the wind guide them around. And then he wins a tug-of-war elimination with the one hand! Okay, he beat Josh, and Josh is a dummy . . . but still impressive. Listening to Jordan's commentary, you'd think Josh was Mike Tyson's Punch Out! come to life. Watch for the pattern, counter accordingly. I hereby dub the loser "Glass Josh." I'm hoping Leroy comes out with a win for once. I mean, from an outsider's perspective, it looks sad to see him crying over dodging the Purge . . . but fans know that he's overdue for a win. I feel for him. Joss & Kayleigh? Not so much. I feel bad for Rogan. He's the only Brit left in the game. Fourteen people on the UK side, and they're all gone except for the guy who got eliminated off the bat three seasons ago. So watching him "knight" CT and Dee was sweet. Too bad he was an ass to Dee. ETA for posterity: Ashley: “This game isn’t over. This is for you to win. This is a million dollars. You got this! Stay focused!” (Music Stops) Jordan: “She’s just gonna steal it from you if you win, Josh.” Cold. BLOODED.

Between the drama of Tribal Council, the storm, and a rat running on her face, I'd give her wiggle room. I'll cop to rooting for her, but I feel I got a point.

No recap from last week. I'm a bit surprised, because I feel the episodes pushed Survivor into the mainstream once again, and Probst and Co. would feel there's no such thing as bad attention. I get how Karishma can bug, and that it doesn't have to be an "either/or" thing with her and Noura . . . but I want Noura out. Blindsided, expected, whatever. She bugs. And I'd add hyperbole, but last week ruined that for me. And I'm happy Karishma snagged an idol. If it comes down to her, Elaine and Janet on Day 39, would that be the worst thing? I mean, IOTI is basically prelude to the fortieth season. When nobody goes to the IOTI, what do Rob and Sandra do? Do they have to live like the contestants?

Hour-long block to end the season.

One word: sexism. Really, while Survivor isn't as bad as Big Brother in behind-the-scenes choices, I still think a lot of the people involve think like Probst . . . only not nearly as "nice."

*sigh* That sounds shady, and thus very MLB. Also, I apologize if I seemed anal posting the Minor League thread. I figured that would be a better place to bitch. The Staten Island Yankees are on the list. Naturally. I seldom get around to watch them, and now they might be going the way of the version of the London Eye that wound up getting scrapped. Also: JJ Putz's name is pronounced "Puts." His entrance music was "Thunderstruck" by AC/DC. Don't ask how or why I remember that.

Bumping up because minor league teams might be getting cut off after 2020 . . . and it turns out the Staten Island Yankees are on the list. *sigh* This is what happens when you don’t get around to watching games in person.

Here’s the Minor League thread. I’m lost . . . why the contraction? I don’t pay attention . . . I wake up one morning, turn on the news, and the Astros are as hated as the Patriots.

Didn't feel like chiming in until now. Basically, Lena's turn was basically the coming of Missy on Doctor Who, where most fans figured she was the Master in a female form. And then that turned out to be correct, but it worked out well because Michelle Gomez went ham-and-a-half on the role. Here, Lena just comes off as petty. We've figured she would turn one day, and she basically rips off the Fortress of Solitude and puts Kara in timeout, all because Kara wouldn't tell her The Secret. And she accuses Kara of making "crocodile tears," which . . . shut up, Lena. Just . . . shut up. Yeah, we got Alex/Kelly and J'onn reconciling with his brother, but the pettiness is just overwhelming. And I can't see a way where Lena comes out of the plot not looking like a villain.

Nothing quite like Fight Clubbing in Ruskistan Bialya to bring the Queen family closer together. And Anatoly becomes the unofficial "Funcle" ("fun uncle") that William and Mia never knew they needed. And then friggin' Lyla ruins everything after Laurel exposes her. Speaking of Laurel . . . looks like Felicity glossed over most of her sketchy history when telling stories to Mia. Or maybe she just recycled stories about Sara. But hey, Laurel-2 has that haircut, so she can't be bad anymore! Wait, Lyla's hair is similar, and she's working with the Monitor.

I like Chester. He's a doof, and he owns it. It took a while for Ralph to get cool. If Chester survives the Crisis, I hope we see more of him. Fun little jaunt with Ralph getting his Bond on and Barry repeatedly wrecking the vibe. It's fluffy, but it was relatively angst-free. Well, until Rosso drops by at the end to reminds us he exists. Wells reveals Barry's secret to Allegra. I mean . . . this is The Flash. If you don't know that Barry is the Flash . . . you might not be that important.

B-U-S-T-E-D. Nope, wait, Lyla turned the tables. Dammit.

Anatoly the Funcle. Why not?

Double smoke bomb for the win. #ThatIsAll

"This isn't a fight pit. It's an operating table. And we're the surgeons."

Russian Michael Buffer is having a great time.

"Bratva Fight Club! Because American pro wrestling and mixed martial arts are for pansies!!!"

Cut to the Waverider. "Do not get me started. You know that you've been declared dead as much as I have, they just shut you down."

I would hope that Felicity would've had some kickass Sara stories.

"We're flawed, Mia. I'm so flawed, every version of me that you can find sucks so hard."

"Roy! Look at me! LOOK AT ME! "Aren't I a handsome man?"

"Man, how does Barry put up with this shit?"

Wow. Bratva sprung for a timer and everything . . .

"GREEN ARROW! I CALL YOU A COWARD!! COME AND FACE ME!!!" "Rubber arrows. Honest."

I'm imagine lots of viewers reaching for a glass of vodka that isn't there anytime Oliver says "Bratva."