Toaster Strudel

Nah, that means she's related to the deceased through marriage/shacking-up with one Kojak Mounts.

Hey guys I just sat on my car hood, turned the motor on, and filled the crater with water. I have a mobile hot tub!

Crystal Mounts, may your name rest in infamy in the annals of Previously.TV. Mother of what, nine children? Did I get that right? None of them in her custody, none of them supported by her, and convicted felon. Let's rejoice that Savannah is safer with her dad who despite his poor judgment of having a child with her, came to his senses and dropped her. I have a feeling he had a lot more to say about his former paramour. And she was suing for some vehicular/camper bullshit? I didn't believe for an instant that she ever pawed the sum of 16K even borrowed from the bank. Scammer. NOT mother of the year. Vinegate was fun, what an idiot plaintiff, if your vine grows over your neighbor's property, you cut it. So what if he ended up cutting it down to the last 6 inches. Vines are notorious for their vigor. It'll grow back in a flash, let her learn a lesson.

I loooved this episode. I loved Glen's self-deprecating comments about his own hair. What a sweetheart. All this goth makeup and special effect craftsmanship and he can't hide it. I loved the emo goth kid. I loved the model's "don't touch me!" - OMG he was so in character, that was so adorable. I love the new gray haired British judge whose name I forget. Love her. I love Mackenzie and Mr Westmore more and more every week. I loved the shock on Sasha's face when she was saved again. I was just as shocked! Her only saving grace was that there were two worse makeups this week. Rachael's cheerleader looked like a burn victim trying to cover her scars with flesh-colored plaster and a trowel, I love that she's the one that went home.

I'm not sure that a judge would find her incompetent. We have this perception that she might be, because she's an elder and sounded so dumb, but there are perfectly competent 40, 50, and 60 year old narcissists that are willing to pay good money to buy themselves some obsequious gallantry, even if only virtual.

I don't watch Dr Phil but I was grabbed today while channel surfing when I saw that a 70 year old (Norma) that sent 300K in the shape of furniture and luxury cars to one "Richard Randall" in Ghana that professed to love her. She can't afford her old age home anymore and now lives with relatives. I was gobsmacked by her profound stupidity. Her addiction to the narcissistic supply provided by the "fiance" she never even met, reached the point of missing her nephew's funeral. I was not surprised to hear that her son estranged himself from Norma, and I applaud him. I'm disappointed that the daughter co-signed all of Norma's drama, as she's a sick, and deranged narcissist. Shame on her for visiting her abysmal decision making on her relatives now. If she was my own mother I'd let her live out of her car (for context, my mother regularly abandoned me in public places when I was six until authorities told her to stop, you can imagine the rest). Norma is a victim of her own craving for flattery and attention, and willingness to be deluded in order to satisfy it. This flattery and attention was worth 300K to her. I say that this impoverished fellow in Ghana, devious as he was, earned at least some of it. Ten percent of viewers tweeted would send money to someone they've never met online after 3 weeks? Here's a income opportunity to the poor in the poorest nations.

It's all the more amazing since it's common knowledge, among JJ audience members, that if you let your insurance lapse, you will get into an accident exactly two days later, 95% of the time.

Wooo hoo, will set my reel-to-reel!

ACK! Even JJ said "rate of speed" today. It's contagious! Best case of the day was the Bible Student Parked Car Mash Up. I was wondering why JJ was prodding him so aggressively about alcohol consumption. Who goes to Bible study to booze up? Right? But then it turns out he had no insurance... and no license. How do you lose your license, if not drinking and driving? Mr Strudel got all excited because he solved the puzzle. This was no Bible study... this was an AA meeting, and he had to have lost his license through a DUI.

I would have no problem being cooped up 24/7 for a week with my husband of 28 year on this isolated island with a beautiful view!

I really like Colin Jost. His delivery is just right. I was watching CNN this afternoon, and Candy Crowley was on, reminding me how absolutely terrible Aidy's "impersonation" was. The only commonality between the two is obesity. Crowley often sounds harsh, and like she has a hot potato in her mouth, but Aidy did none of that. Pity.

I see what you did there, trying to sell me Comcast cable and internet install...

Michael Che was terrible. What was Lorne thinking? He was tripping over every second word, he can't enunciate, and his delivery was uneven and not at all funny. Then Leslie Jones makes her appearance... and although her bit wasn't funny, she was. Just seeing her, and she wins me over. If she could tone it down a little, she'd be so perfect for the anchor desk. Dump Che and bring Leslie on! Chris Pratt's personality lights up the stage but he wasn't given much to work on all night. The super heroes touching their privates was the antithesis of everything I've ever loved on SNL. They overdid it. It's like they got stuck on that idea. I also agree with "too much Aidy" to which I'll add "not enough Kate." Pete is going to be great. I loooove him already. NFL Offenses was hilarious. I loved all the cast members checking in, even Jost! And treason? Treason? Had me rolling.

He did have the deameanor of a guy that smokes a lot of pot. I mean a real lot. He seemed to be mentally slowed down.

I suspect all episodes were filmed by the time they were aired.

I watched the last 10 minutes because of the unexpected schedule change. *yawn*

Clarification: the band AND the couple were boring. When a show episodes is pulled out of the Monday 10PM slot to premiere two episodes back to back Saturday afternoon, you know it's not getting renewed. The psychos were fun while they lasted, though.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HmdjICBqnko "Enjoy" LOL, looking for a lead singer... They were both excruciatingly boring.

"Bicoastal model" after a "social woman" and a "LA party girl" - is this show doing its casting in seedy LA bars? If so, it's genius. Keep up the good work.

She vehemently denied it, he had no proof, so in JJspeak "it didn't happen."

I have this hunch that Deandre likes to prey on charitable churchgoers.

A kid gets PTSD from being bitten by a big dog, becomes afraid of the neurotic family Greyhound, and they end up rehoming it. Owner of said big dog, who knew the dog was twitchy, and was in denial as usual, didn't have homeowner's insurance to cover his raging beasts, gets to keep his vicious animal. The $5000 award doesn't even begin to make this fair, but at least it's in the right direction. Dogs. Don't get me started.

And there is probably ample alcohol and red bull involved for both parties.

She was very open and lively when alone with the camera, talking to herself. But from the moment he brought up her heavy assed suitcase up the stairs, anyone could tell from her body language that she was already eager to be displeased and offended. Maybe she had a tapeworm and a yeast infection.

Lawrence was a decent, honest, caring human being - I would have expected him to be much more into himself. Quite the contrary! Despite Nicole's hostile and unfriendly attitude, he really tried to get her to open up, while keeping an open mind - for a lot longer than most men would have. He was extraordinarily gracious with her. I also laud him for finding her attractive; he was indeed out of her league, both in appearance, and in intelligence. She looked like she had dunked her face in a bucket of undiluted spray tan and tried to get some of it out of her eyes with a wet facecloth. Lawrence complimented her on her bright eyes... yeah... like stars in an orange sky. She dressed terribly, smoked, she had no class at all, but as we discover at the end, she thinks herself really classy. The guy really tried. He was the one with class, wishing that she would find someone to love her, and sounding sincere saying it. With her previously abusive relationship, I think she was being a self-pitying sad sack, and it wasn't hard for me to imagine that whoever she dated before became frustrated with her negative attitude and that she was the instigator of a lot of unpleasant situations. So what if he was naked on the first day? It wouldn't bother me one bit. I'm sure she had a picture of "it" on her cell phone, this is 2014. At some point, Toaster Jr and I realized that she had the vocabulary of a cat. Lawrence: So I wanted to ask you, do you like me? Nicole: .... mmm... prewmeow Lawrence: Sometimes I don't understand what you're saying. Nicole: rrrrrprrrr Lawrence: I feel like I'm carrying the whole conversation. Nicole: mew Lawrence: And I'm not getting any energy back from you. Nicole: hiss Nicole was a huge chunky bitter pill, brimming with disappointment, displeasure, and loathing. The eggs that she cooked looked terrible, Lawrence looked like he was politely choking on them.