FaithsMum

Ah right. I was reading FaithsDad's medical journal the other week and there was an article about livers lasting 30 years. I guess from what I remembered I must have interpreted that as the norm, rather than hugely uncommon. Now that I think about it, I think it said "known to last up to 30 years" which would infer it's rarity, my mistake! I can totally see why you (and many others) were turned off by Bethenny's spin offs. Bethenny is best when she's being the snarky, but not mean-spirited, Greek chorus. My memories from BGM and BEA are pretty hazy, but from what I can remember she wasn't as likeable or as entertaining... Plus I didn't like Jason, so that probably didn't help either. Her meltdown(s) on her birthday one season, I'm pretty sure, did make me shout at my laptop "get a fucking grip!" Sorry, I'm on my phone and I'm too lazy to quote paragraph by paragraph but I agree on your final point. I enjoy your posts despite not always agreeing with them. The differing of opinions and perceptions is exactly what makes it fun here! I read much more than I reply and many times, other posters (you're probably one of them!) have made points I haven't considered which have changed my perception of a scene.

Transplanted livers can last up to 30 years, unless Heather has said otherwise with regards to Jax? I fast forward through many of her scenes and have since midway through her first season. Not that I'm in any way dismissing Jax's health problems or the stress that comes from having a very ill kid.I do see the point you're making and it's likely her sons illness has contributed to her controlling nature but honestly I find it hard to believe Heather wasn't, on some level, this way prior to having Jax. Type A personalities don't form overnight. To me, Jax probably exacerbated what was already a part of her character. Whilst I was doing my nursing degree, I worked as a carer for young adults who have severe learning/physical disabilities; all but one of their parents did not behave like Heather and frankly, from our point of view, she was a fucking nightmare. I think the thing is with not cutting Heather slack is that some people just don't like her. It's unfair, yes - but generally those people who are more forgiving towards her are the same people who think Bethenny needs to get over her childhood. Sidenote: not directed at you personally, just an observation. :) Like everyone, Bethenny can be obnoxious - maybe even more than most - but I find her entertaining enough that while sometimes I side-eye her, it's not enough to make me dislike her. Since Heather just irritates the shit out of me, I'm not so generous. As I said, it's absolutely unfair but I don't post on here to be a paragon of fairness and impartiality. :)

Yeah, I agree - I think Heather is a mean girl in some ways. The outdated lingo/cultural appropriation doesn't particularly bother me since I consider it (rightly or wrongly) "Americanism's" and based on that I wouldn't watch anything produced by the US! I do find her use or "mama" irritating though, mostly because she's not their mother. I have no problem with terms of endearments; the guy in the shop I buy cigarettes from doesn't offend me by calling me "love" or "darling" but I guess, I don't really get the mama thing. I did wonder if it annoyed Bethenny so much because that's what Jason used to call her. LuAnn tweeted a couple of weeks ago that she wants to "cook" Heather when she says "what's cookin' Mama?" so it apparently irritates more than just Bethenny. I thought it was pretty mean of her to exclude Ramona from her London trip back in her first season. Yeah, she and Ramona weren't exactly BFF's at the time and in any other situation I wouldn't have an issue with that but this is a reality show, and she's your colleague. She either genuinely did not invite her or she played along with production for a storyline, either way that isn't endearing. And yes, I get they all/many of them play along but they all suck for doing so. Brave obviously approved of Ramona not being invited since while I think Kelly Bensimon is a nutjob, I believe her that she was at least strongly encouraged to go to Scary Island. I'm on the Morocco trip of S4 and will re-watch S5 when I've finished but I have this vague memory of Heather/Ramona butting heads and then Heather proceeding to follow Ramona around at an event with her serial killer smile in an attempt to rile her. Can anyone else remember the details any better?

I finally watched the episode earlier today (although I had already read this thread!) Eh, Bethenny's brittleness doesn't really bother me. I mean, people don't always react to stress in ways that necessarily make them sympathetic to others. I'm hospitalised with anorexia atm; at least once a day I have an internal pity party with myself about how much my life sucks right now and how I'm a fucking adult who doesn't have the freedom to a) leave or b) make my own medical decisions. Catch me in the wrong mood and I'm equally as likely to bite your head off or burst into tears. More bite your head off, if I'm honest. I'm every bit as brittle and tightly wound as Bethenny is right now and truthfully as a result I don't always respond in a pretty way that make it easy for others to empathise. I don't consider these meltdowns my finest moments but human nature is not so black and white and people respond to stress differently. However, I would not go on a reality show because unlike Bethenny I do seem to be aware my fragility and reaction to it isn't exactly the most endearing thing about me. I have no idea what Bethenny's reasons were for coming back, but it was a bad, bad move... And I say that as someone who, overall, likes Bethenny although I wouldn't want to be friends with her, or even know her since I imagine she's exhausting to be around whether she's "happy" or "sad." I've never liked Heather and frankly I now feel my dislike of her is justified! For me, her need to "fix" is not out of genuine kindness, it's a desire to stroke her own ego and control a situation. She exhausts me too and I fucking hate the way she smiles. I hate the scrunched up nose, the clamped together like she's having a seizure teeth. (I have epilepsy so I feel I can make the comparison!) There's something I find incredibly insincere about her. Luann looked amazing at Dorinda's gathering! While I wouldn't wear the dress since I consider it "too old" for me, I thought Luann looked beautiful. One thing about her is that she almost always looks fabulous while being completely age appropriate. I'm liking Luann these last few seasons. I've just been re-watching seasons 1-4 and Christ, for many reasons, she was insufferable throughout them particularly with her shoving the Countess shtick down everyone's throats and crawling up Jill's arse season 3/4. I love Ramona. I can't help it. But then I also love Tre, Vicki, Nene, Lisa V, Phaedra so there's probably something wrong with me! :)

Thank you for your explanation, I had obviously wrongly assumed that they were a Spanx copycat! :)

I read a lot about Heather being a "successful business woman" but really, is YummieTummie that successful?? I'm genuinely not being facetious; I live in the UK and I've never heard of it nor have I ever seen it anywhere since discovering it's existence through RHONY so I don't think it's giving Spanx a run for its money on this side of the Atlantic. She did that interview with Lorraine in her first season on the London trip which I only saw because of the show since like almost everyone else in the country, I watch the BBC's breakfast show, not ITV's.

Kim looks like an alien. In England we have these crisps called Space Raiders, that's what she reminds me of. I'm on my phone so I can't link a picture, but Google 'em. I won't hate on her for not finding pregnancy this wonderful experience though because for some women it just isn't; I'm one of them. Frankly, I loathed every single minute of it and despite my daughter being a "miracle" (I had had many miscarriages and she was born at 24 weeks) that didn't alter the fact that I hated being pregnant. For me, the pregnancy itself was a means to an end - I desperately wanted a baby but the weight gain triggered my anorexia like a motherfucker, I had all day sickness until the day I delivered my daughter and my hands and feet swelled up like balloons to the extent it greatly restricted the use of my hands since I could only bend my fingers about halfway. I think it does women a disservice to criticise them for not enjoying pregnancy; it's another form of shaming women and making them feel guilty for their "abonormal" feelings. Some women just don't find pregnancy to be this amazing thing, and that's fine. Of course Kim is a vacuous, vapid human being who has little interest in the child she has... So there is that. But, still, I won't criticise her for her misery throughout her pregnancy with North. And, of course, it's not a coincidence she announced her pregnancy the day before Caitlyn's VF cover was released.

While I wish these vapid morons weren't allowed to procreate, I am glad that North will have someone who understands the pain of having Kimye as parents. I hope it's not a boy. Poor child doesn't stand a chance in that family if it's a boy. Just ask Rob...

I think she has shared custody. I'm not sure of the exact details but I think it's pretty much 50/50. On a personal level I feel bad for her. It's absolutely best thing for a kid to have time with both parents but it must be pretty shitty to send your kid(s) off to their other parent half of their life and feel as if you're missing out on them. I too would be devastated if I had to do the same with my kids. Plus, for Bethenny, Bryn is the only person she has who is "hers" since she doesn't appear to associate with any extended family, even and she's an only child.

I agree - especially not someone who is, at best, a work colleague/acquaintance. I've never liked Heather; she's not done anything I could definitively give a reason to justify my dislike, there's just something about her that rubs me the wrong way and she grates on my nerves. And I'm going to hell on wheels for this but her fucking scrunched up nose smile irritates the shit out of me. Does anyone know why, unlike the others, we never see Heather at home?

I'm not going to comment on Amber's weight either way; I have anorexia and and thus everyone has an opinion on mine which I'm naturally extremely sensitive about so I choose to to criticise others. However, since I'm an expert in deprivation and starvation, I do not agree with your stance on depriving oneself of "empty calories." Most things in moderation as fine and are considered a healthy attitude to food. In addition, Amber probably takes antidepressants/anti psychotics which commonly cause weight gain that is almost impossible to shift whilst still taking them. Your final paragraph is why I said if it doesn't exacerbate any pre-existing emotional problems and she is able to do so in moderation. If she's able to have one glass of wine occasionally, stop and be fine I don't see the big deal. If she's not, then that is an issue and she should refrain from drinking. You could be right and she is headed for a huge relapse; addicts tend to relapse many, many times before they finally are clean but I'm simply not comfortable nailing her to a wall because she was seen drinking wine.

I had to read that about three times I was so confused at first!! :) I have a "y" name too - and my mum was 24 when she had me. In fact, my first name has two; Kayley. It's definitely a "young persons" name (I'm 27), as in I've never heard of a 60 year old with my name but mostly I think it's fine. Kayleigh is the more traditional spelling and my mum spelled it my way so it would be easier for me to learn as a kid. The problem is everyone else spells it incorrectly!!

I'm a nurse on A+E so we get a lot of kiddies with injuries. We all joke with one another that we can guess the age of the kids mother just by their name alone. 95% of the time if the kid has a stupid name, their mother was in their teens/early 20's when they had him/her. I'm still upset that I have something in common with Ferret Face from TM2; Addie's middle name is the same as my daughters first name. It still makes me want to weep. I guess we should all be grateful she didn't spell it "Faiythhe" since we all know Leah loves those superfluous letters.

Thank you! I thankfully did not marry mine; he was an abusive, controlling, psychotic shit which, with hindsight, explains why he wanted a 16 year old, barely out of school. I put up with him for two years before I'd had enough. I feel pretty bad for my parents now as there was very little they could do. In the UK, 16 is the age of consent and though you're not an adult if I disappeared off to his home (which was a few hundred miles away) they could not legally have me brought home. The police would refuse to intervene and I was not "stupid" enough to ever give them an address. I was stubborn and for a long time, besotted and I didn't care what anyone had to say about it and so I was doing what I was doing. I met my husband when I was 19. He was 35. My parents were just as thrilled about that!! Eight years on they've just about accepted it! :) I always figure Ryan was interested in 16 year old Maci because she was young and adoring in addition to probably being pretty pliable when he wanted to have unprotected sex. Not that I think 20 year olds are always a paragon of responsibility but those few years can make a difference and there's a far greater chance of someone with that little bit more life experience seeing through his bullshit.

Yep. This is true for me. People tend to side-eye (recovering) addicts who still use other addictive substances and state they're not clean/sober and headed for a fall. I'm a recovering addict who drinks occasionally. Alcohol really isn't my thing, I'm not drinking a glass of wine with my meal but on a night out with my friends, yeah I get drunk. I've never abused alcohol and despite my addiction to many things I don't think I'm likely to since it's purely a social thing for me and doesn't give me what I "need." I took drugs because they gave me peace I don't otherwise have. I use my anorexia as a distraction and coping mechanism. I chain smoke because it that hand-to-mouth calms me. But alcohol? That's just a fun thing I do occasionally when I'm partying with my friends. I guess I don't find Amber's drinking as fatalistic as others. If alcohol makes one violent, aggressive or anxious then it's probably a good idea not to drink - but that applies, addict or not. If she is able to drink in moderation and it doesn't exacerbate her pre-existing emotional problems then eh, I don't really think a glass of wine here and there is that big of a deal.

I have just binge watched DC and frankly it was as glorious as I remembered! I really wish they'd have brought it back; I love the politics aspect which is so different to the others Housewives franchises. Who you knew in politics was currency - not how big your house is and the size of your boobs. And I really enjoyed the non traditional social climbing of the HW compared to its counterparts. Michaele and Tareq are my all time favourite HW couple. Don't get me wrong, I think they're loathsome, vile, pretentious people but Jesus, their delusions are fun to watch. With Sonja, for example, her split from reality makes me uncomfortable now but M&T had me cackling. It baffles me how Bravo kept trying to make Miami happen but gave up so quickly on DC. I get that M&T were an issue with their garecrashing but surely they could have re-cast. It's not like they've never given shows a huge overhaul before. Overall, the cast was far more likeable and interesting than those bimbo's in Miami.

I thought the same. If everything Bethenny describes of her childhood is true (and I'm inclined to believe her) then I can't believe her mother hasn't screamed that in her face one, twice or ten times throughout her life. I would perhaps think it's one of those things that becomes no less painful each time you hear it and potentially hurt more being repeated matter of factly by a third party opposed to having it yelled at her by her mother. My Mum didn't want children either - she got me on the old school IUD's (no hormones) and for a while they thought I was stomach ulcer! She's the best mother though and although it's never been a state secret that she didn't want kids, she's always said that I may have been an unwanted pregnancy, but I was never an unwanted child. Eh, it doesn't bother me. It never has - my brother and I have always known we are absolutely the loves of her life. I guess that's the difference. I feel bad for Bethenny. Sure she's flawed and damaged but just because you know you should be able to let something go (and I'm sure she does) doesn't mean you're able to necessarily put that in to practise because unfortunately we can't make ourselves feel - or not feel - something. For whatever reason, I think Bethenny is pretty open with the cameras so she drags them to her "therapy" sessions etc and Damaged Bethenny is what Bravo finds interesting about her and so that is what they show. I think she probably babbles on about her childhood far less than we see - and often is probably prompted to do so. I've always liked her. I wouldn't want to be her BFF - or honestly even know her since I imagine she's exhausting - but she's my favourite of all the Housewives on any franchise particularly with an ensemble cast where she can make snarky little observations about the others in her TH. For me, she's good TV. Give me Bethenny over the likes of Sonja who is now truly delusional to the extent I feel a little uncomfortable when she's rambling about her non existent "brand." At least Bethenny has enough self awareness to know she's fucked up unlike poor Sonja.

I have anorexia; I'm currently hospitalised and have been for the last seven months. I also have three daughters and have struggled with my ED throughout their lives since this isn't my first hospitalisation... So I'm not going to win any awards for Mother of the Year - my husband and my parents are currently parenting my children. I have this overwhelming fear and guilt that I'm ruining my children's childhood and I hope they will grow up and have empathy for my struggles. I hope they will forgive my absences throughout their formative years. But if they don't, if they're damaged and angry at me, well then, I would understand that too and while I can't help having a mental illness, they didn't choose to be my kids or have a crazy mum. My kids and my husband are the victims of my anorexia, not me. It's much easier to say Bethenny should have compassion for her mother when you're removed from the situation. A mental illness does not give one a free pass from the damage we cause, it merely helps explain it and from what I can tell Bethenny's mother has never tried to make it right. She's never attempted to heal the havoc she wreaked on her child and so for that reason I don't think she deserves Bethenny's sympathy.

I'm pretty sure Maci actually was "16 and pregnant" - she just looks far older than she is!! Catelynn too was 16 and I think is the youngest of the four, almost two full years younger than Amber. Farrah was a few months shy of 18 when she had Sophia. I'm so ashamed of myself that I even know this. But yeah, you're right - "18 and pregnant" doesn't have quite the same ring because while you're still a teenager, you're legally (if not emotionally!) an adult. I can't really criticise Ryan/Maci because at 16, I had a 24 year old boyfriend. Yeah, my parents were fucking thrilled. I also fell pregnant at 16 but I chose a different path than these girls and I'm grateful everyday that unlike Maci I'm not tied to my ex for the rest of my life.

The whole "16 and pregnant" shtick is often bullshit. Amber is the eldest of all the TM girls, she just turned 25 this week (I'm so embarrassed I know that!) so she was actually 18 when she had Leah - she was never "16 and pregnant."

Thank you! :) I wish the same for her too and while NA/therapy may be the more traditional routes, they're not the only ones. Prior to being hospitalised when I craved drugs, I picked up a book or painted my nails or did something to distract myself until it passed. I do the same now when I feel the urge to obsess about my weight. I'm not going to shit on NA etc because it works for many, but it's just not my thing... And so I found alternatives. Reading and posting on here is one of them!! Of all the TM girls on all franchises, I'm rooting for Amber the hardest. Besides Chelsea I hate them all, so it isn't too difficult - but I quite like sober Amber and I have empathy for her since she seems pretty alone in the world. When an MTV producer who makes money off your trainwreck life is clearly your confidante and one of your few "friends" and is likely the most stable, rational adult in your life that is very, very sad.

Maybe NA is just not Amber's thing - and she doesn't want to outright say it since overall it's a respected programme. If that's the case I can't fault her on that because it's not my thing either as I find the presumption that we all believe in a Christian God and must rely on a "higher power" tiresome. In addition, telling my shit to a room full of strangers several times a week is not my thing either. I'm doubly fucked up since I'm currently hospitalised due to anorexia (prior to being hospitalised I had been clean three years but I no longer have the right to make medical decisions for myself and opiods are unfortunately forced on me) While I do want to regain my sanity, I avoid therapy as much as possible and I flat out refuse to attend group. However, unlike Amber, my family and friends are incredibly supportive and that is my therapy. I'm not saying Amber isn't lazy and she does need to do something but not everyone champions therapy/NA or finds it to be helpful. Like Kim Richards, she needs to get a fucking hobby, or three.

I completely agree. Outside of her children she has no other responsibilities and even then, from what I can tell their fathers remained in their lives so child rearing was not ever entirely her responsibility anyway. She didn't have to drag her hungover arse out of bed because she needed to go to work to put food on the table and thus never learned that as adults we have obligations that need to be met. She's perpetually 14 years old. My children are still very young but I have learned/learning that it's not fair to "depend" on them to keep me distracted, even if they're still young enough to not be quite aware of it. Of course when I'm home chasing after three little precocious madams does keep me busy but they have school and friends and gymnastics and bedtimes. They're not there for me to run around after 24/7 nor should they be. I feel bad for Kim's children because I can imagine the guilt she lays on them when they haven't come home for a few weeks or they want to hang with their friends. It isn't their responsibility to keep her sober, that's on her - and she needs to find something, or several something's, which take her out of her own head. It's great your son worked at a soup kitchen btw, all teenagers (and Kim!) should do something like that. Thank you! Haha, yes we do. That's so true. When I eventually get out of here, I often wonder what I'm going to do with my time because all my free time was spent planning and scheming or obsessively weighing myself on my "secret" scales. Or measuring my thighs with a tape measure. Or wondering how I'm going to hide the symptoms I've used - my husband is a doctor, he can tell if I've taken something I shouldn't in about two seconds flat. Now Kim's kids have flown the nest she needs to stay busy, busy, busy until her sobriety is much more secure and she has learned coping mechanisms. I think Kim feels that too. I used to, and it wasn't helped because some people around me would say that if they'd survived what I had, they'd take drugs too. They didn't mean to give me "permission" but my addicts mind used it as a justification; totally telling my life story to strangers here but I became an addict when a patient didn't much like my bedside manner it seems - I was raped and badly beaten, the head injury leaving me with epilepsy. So like a lot of pharma opiod addicts, I developed the dependence with prescribed meds for legitimate pain. I found I liked the way they made me feel because when I was high, I would "forget" about what happened and "forget" about my very abusive, psychotic ex boyfriend. The anorexia though I developed as a child although it didn't become "serious" until I was in my late teens. Addiction is usually a symptom of something else and unless Kim deals with whatever there is in her that wants to be high/drunk, she's going to be stuck in this cycle forever. I have learned that I use drugs and my anorexia as coping mechanisms because when I'm obsessing about both of those things, I'm not thinking about everything else. Really it's just running away and until I deal with the underlying causes, I'm always going to want to starve myself to non existence. Kim unfortunately seems to have little self-awareness and I don't think that's a result of her addiction, it's just who she is which is going to make recovery a million times harder for her. I was in Dubai last year, and yes drinking is allowed as a non-Muslim, non-native although it's restricted somewhat to the tourist-y areas. My husband is a "lapsed Muslim" (his words!) and he was refused alcohol a couple of times though.

Oh, that's true I think. The greatest irony of any addiction is that you lose control trying to find it. Kim, I figure, is in this weird no mans land that is mostly a shitty place to be in. She admits that she has an addiction on some level but at the same time she's not ready to let it go or accept any culpability... Although I may be overestimating her ability to self-reflect. Being there pretty much sucks. For me at least, there was some awareness that I'm not completely in control of my own mind which frightened me and so I wanted to control everything else. And we plan shit; when you're an addict for long enough and the people around you are aware of it, you know the types of things that will be said to you - and you figure out your response accordingly. You spend so much time doing it that you begin to believe your own bullshit and there is no budging from that viewpoint. I never played the victim in the way Kim does but I was just as calculated and stubborn. Now that my life is controlled by doctors and psychiatrists I have all this free time on my hands which, as crazy as this is, is why I'm posting here. I'm no longer spending hours figuring how I'm going to get drugs or calorie counting or planning how I will avoid eating the following day. Kim needs to get a fucking hobby. Or three. Because recovery is this process where you have to learn to distract yourself until the cravings pass. Relying on others is fine to a point but she is never, ever going to recover if at 2am, she doesn't figure out an alternative to ringing Brandi (lol) It also gives one a sense of accomplishment that you got through that on your own and acts as a reminder for when the next one hits. Thank you for your kind words WireWrap, CrinkleCutCat, Motorcitymom65 and rehoboth. Reading what you guys write about the housewives who give us all so much to snark about is what I do at almost 4am when the urge to count calories and purge hits.

No, I don't think so either. It's true that it has to absolutely be something you want since it requires such a huge amount of willpower and effort. For me, my addiction was "easier" than my anorexia - but truthfully I have never lived without either because I just fall back on my anorexia which ultimately isn't all that different to alcohol or drug abuse. I got tired of drugs far sooner and I actively sought help for that. But with my anorexia, I am like Kim. Treatment has always been forced on me when my weight has become so low that my life is at risk. This time is different and much more difficult because I am actually trying. During the previous sections I played the long game so I was largely compliant because in addition to being insane, I'm also a nurse, I know how sections works - once my weight became a certain amount and I'm mostly eating, they would legally have to lift the section whereby I could discharge myself. I'm not proud of it since I lied and manipulated the fuck out of everyone around me - and that isn't who I am - but owning up to my shit (even to strangers on a forum!) matters. I like being high too. I also really like starving myself down to 56lbs. But neither of those things are worth not seeing my children grow up anymore and this is my last chance; my body can't take the abuse anymore and I'm 27 years old with three little girls who need me and for some reason a husband who despite everything still thinks I'm personally responsible for the sun rising and setting everyday. I guess Kim isn't there yet, it's still worth it for her. If she wasn't so awful which I don't believe is a result of her alcoholism I would feel very sorry for her because I know what it's like to be there. I don't like to believe that addicts can't somehow be redeemed but maybe Kim is one of them since she is unable to own her shit. I'd put money on it that she genuinely believes everything she spouts and is not lying in bed at night wandering who the fuck she's turned into as I did... And on bad days, sometimes still do. Thank you - that's a very sweet thing to say. I was on TWOP but haven't really been here since I made an account after it shut down. I had forgotten how lovely and kind everyone is! xx