Pepper Mostly

Oh, you are adorable. As if.

I too dislike random stuff in my ice cream. No nuts, no chocolate chips, no oreo bits, please. Though I do love Ben and Jerry's Phish Food. Not really one for ice cream, though. Cake and cookies are my downfall. I can stuff down an alarming number of cookies in a sitting. I have a recipe for double chocolate espresso cookies that is to die for. But I don't make cookies often because they are too much work and I am lazy.

"The way the process has been going is very upsetting" This is beyond passive voice. She "strayed from the plan" for one week? And gained 29 pounds? Heaven help us all, she is hopeless.

Oh, she FEELS like she's lost weight. DUN DUN DUN.

Where are the pee pad wontons of yesteryear?

Girl, go do food prep in the kitchen! Why are you messing around with raw chicken in your living room??

I come down pretty firmly on the side of cake, but I love love love lemon meringue pie. My husband loves pie. I make pretty good pies but I don't like making them. Too fiddly! Make the pastry, chill it, roll it out, blind bake, fill, roll out the top crust, egg wash it....gah! And if its something like apple pie, you have to peel and slice up all those apples. So I very rarely make pie, though I can whip up a cake in no time.

So first we had Jardience musical theater, now we have the antacid country band? Where does this end?

Next time you are anywhere near you MUST let me know! I would love to meet up! (that goes for any of my fat chat pals, btw!) If you didn't see me you probably saw my son! He's always out and about downtown of an evening.

"Its not going to shock me if its not a positive number on the scale" means "I've been stuffing down burritos and Peeps and mashed potatoes and gravy as fast as a starving aardvark at an anthill". It is not enough to WANT it. You have to actually DO it!

My husband always get called to the Newburyport courthouse, and that's civil court, so its all property disputes and whatnot. Talk about boring!

I always figured I was a prime candidate, being a fat old white lady. I suppose I could wear my "Question Authority" button, or my red fist one.

First rule is make sure you have a good book. I've spent most of the time I've had a call for jury duty in the church basement across the street from the courthouse, waiting around to be called. Its so deadly boring. Every time I get a summons, I get summonsed to Lawrence, MA, which is about twenty odd miles from me, and no public transport to speak of to get there! I do not drive. I live in Salem, with both a district and superior court! And the bus goes right there! I have to request a change of venue every time. So annoying.

Oh no, our kids were about nineteen when this happened! I hadn't seen her or her son for ten years!

Dear god his legs. That' can't be healthy.

I'm sure I've told this story before, but the last time I was called and had to hang around for hours it was for a big high profile murder trial (high school kid who murdered his teacher, all over the news, ghastly). Everyone at the courthouse was very tight-lipped and didn't spill but it became obvious once we'd been there awhile. I was FREAKING out. I know that the jury has to go to the murder scene and look at horrible graphic photos and all that. I was frantically reading the witness lists in the vain hope that I'd know someone, but I'm not sociable and don't know people, so no joy there. We were there waiting around so long they put a movie on for us. Finally they brought us in to meet the judge, and all of us had to approach the sidebar individually and tell the judge that it wouldn't be a hardship to serve. I'm freaking out. I do not want to do this. THEN I see the defense team. One of the lawyers was the mother of one of my son's classmates from elementary school, and we'd been pretty friendly back then. So after I told the judge it wouldn't be a hardship, I walked past the lawyers and was all "SUSAN! HI-EE! How ARE you?? How's Jackson! You're looking GREAT!" She was mortified. As I was leaving I heard someone say "STOP THAT JUROR!" and I was dismissed. I can still feel the relief that flooded through me.

I served on a jury several years ago. It was really quick, though, over in a day. Some crazy dude who was bagged for trespassing and some other thing. He was sleeping under a shrub at the police station! He INSISTED on going to trial. Crazy as a bedbug, said he was working for the FBI. I get a summons every few years, but most of the time its cancelled. I had just been idly thinking "Hmm, been awhile since I've been called" and Bingo, what to my wondering eyes should appear in my mailbox? You guessed it. When my son did his grand jury service it was for about four months, three days a week. The district and superior courts are both in my town, too, so getting there isn't a hassle.

Her life is torture. But she just can't quit that extra chocolate drizzle!

Don't hate yourself! We are all sometimes tempted, and fall. And really, candy coated chocolate eggs are iresistable. Yahoo! I have a jury summons for next month, but according to my brother, since I'm over seventy I'm not required to serve. News to me. I wouldn't mind if I got a grand jury, though. My son had to serve on a grand jury a couple of years ago and he got paid! Which I wouldn't mind. It was only three days a week and they were usually done by lunchtime. Poor guy, though. He's a sensitive soul and some of the cases really got to him.

Hola fat chatters! How's everyone's Wednesday going? What's your eating habit? How's your laig? Is your mattress making you look fat?

Never mind his spine,have you seen his FACE? He's a model and I'm a turkey. They're recommitting to breaking up. Aaaaaaand @Gobi has won the internet today!

Sorry peeps, going to miss the fun tonight-houseguest and I are going to watch Recipes for Love and Murder! Catch you all on the flip side. Take detailed notes so I can catch up later. Don't miss any of the subtleties. So much is unspoken.

Good night friends! Have a great Monday, see you die hards tomorrow night. Love you all, smooches!

Who could blame him? Every time I see the mute appeal in his eyes I want to just give him a big hug and put him on the bus to the nearest dock. Get on a cruise ship, Juan! Live your life!

I thought gelatin was from calves/cows hooves? Not pigs?