CletusMusashi

Alpha, as she'd prefer you addressed her, has the world too afraid to molest her With her mask on her head she looks just like the dead And without it just like Uncle Fester

He forgot "As soon as your kid becomes an interesting person, he will be killed off and replaced with Henry." I'd call that one about -40.

As much as I like tigers, maybe King Zeke should have taken an elephant.

Mah dotta run off Ah fond 'er en tanned 'er hahd So she'd be drissed raht.

Well, if he's a ghost then Lori can watch him. That always went well.

I'm mixed about my agreement here. In interviews, she's actually very charismatic and very comfortable speaking on camera, and if she'd been cast in the show as a less grim character than Michonne, pretty much by definition, has to be, her actual real-life mannerisms would have worked, but that personality is not what people want to see her do. Just like Jim Carey, for example, has tremendous range as an actor but people always just want him to be Ace Ventura, people just want Danai to play a tough, stoic warrior. Which she can do, if that's the script they hand her. But if the script they give her is just an allegedly tough, stoic warrior waving her arms around and bickering with Negan, then the character we're watching is neither Danai nor Michonne, nor whoever else Danai might eventually go on to play elsewhere when she inevitably tires of this awful show.

Whenever he dresses like he's in a spaghetti western, I figure it must be Tuesday.

I don't think there was any way to win on the masks. Make them look good, and we wonder how the Ramblers have the time and skill to craft such perfect-looking masks out of zombie skin. Make them look crude, and we laugh at how crude they are. And make it dark enough for them to be scary, and we just bitch that we can't see anything.

Is this a Romeo and Juliet thing? 'Cause... I'd be okay with the same ending...

I'll tell you something, with the nauseatingly adorable cowgirl outfit, and the goody-two-shoes moralizing, and the love of Negan, it is a testament to the acting chops of that little girl that I actually still sort of like the character. Hey, Alpha just whispered a sentence!

At least Henry's tied up now. See? It's not that hard to keep him where he's supposed to be.

OK, even with the extreme monologue, that scene was pretty funny.

Yeah, but that was the only one who actually whispered. Now they're the Drawlers or something.

Eugene is with the wrong group. I think he'd be happier in Tigertown.

For a second I was like "wait, Lydia's a badass now?" But then I remembered that she was just beating up Henry.

Why are they bothering to walk like zombies when there are obvious regular people right there in the group?

So what do they call each other when they run out of Greek letters?

Aren't there only about six people living in Alexandria now?

I'm actually wishing Father Fucking Pee Pants would seduce Michonne, just to make her less cranky.

You'd think one of them would have a spare mask. Poor Lydia. She's doomed to be the uncool one, like Marilyn Munster.

Alpha is not even trying to sound like a zombie.

The baby was being offered to the walkers as food. So I think as long as Hilltop just say "We ate it," everything's cool.

Watch. Now that he's about to finally do something fun, we're gonna get a whole episode about the other Hilltop teens.

I'm actually looking forward to tonight. Henry sitting around being emo does nothing for me, but Henry rushing out blindly to meet the future in-laws could be fun.

With this site's new-styled forum directory, it actually took me a while to figure out where "Riverdale" was. The show is so fucking loony that at first I checked the section for "genre" shows. Then, I actually checked "comedies" before I remembered that, although it is one of the funniest shows on television, it is not actually meant to be. Finally I realized that it is meant to be some kind of reasonably serious dramatic whatchamathingy, and found it under "dramas." But thinking of "Riverdale" as just a teen drama feels kind of like saying that "Futurama" was a show about parcel delivery.