Heathen

I'd like to see the Stews' monthly expenses -- the necessary expenses, not the Starbucks runs, nail salons, professional hair color, custom golf clubs, and so on. I mean just the mortgage, insurance, car payment, electric, water, natural gas, trash, cell phones, cable (you know they gotta have it), and food. Ten thousand a month? I wouldn't be surprised.

My library co-op doesn't even have it listed already. I emailed my library to see if they were planning to order it.

What do you expect from an adult woman who poses with her tongue out like she's Gene Simmons? I would bet that she hit a tanning booth or professional spray tan at least before the last cash-and-carry, or whenever that photo with her hand on Whitney's abdomen was taken. Carlin's tan was suspiciously, uniformly dark and even, and that doesn't happen from just "playing outside." It's either a pro spray tan or a tanning booth.

🤣🤣🤣 I'll believe it when I see it.

There are bobcats, coyotes, and probably bears in Tennessee as well. Erin should know, too. I realize she's a head-in-the-clouds hobby farmer, but still.

What, you DON'T like having long-ass hair in your food? Picky, picky, picky.

I always giggle at Malucci asking Mark about the "Australian boys." Funny. And the interns giving him side-eye as he scratches.

Gee whiz, here I've been getting IV iron infusions for anemia for three years and counting, and all I needed to do was drink some Plexus! Damn those hematologists! So anyway, is Heidi going to take over bleaching Timmy's hair after her marriage and righteous deflowering, or will Jill come over and do it for her baby boy?

We give people the benefit of the doubt until they demonstrate that they are lying. Carlin is lying. The EEG will never happen because there is no reason to have one. Mental illness in the form of factitious disorder may be the reason for the lying, but it's still lying.

Fortunately, her uterus has packed it in. Lousy mother indeed. Too bad Gil's swimmers didn't stop swimming about thirty years ago.

Kelly received specialized treatment during her later pregnancies -- the progesterone that allowed her to maintain pregnancies. "Gawd's will" only applies if it's something they want, of course. I'd be surprised if Uwe and Hannelore "we were persecuted in Germany!!!" Romeike carry that evil American health insurance. Gawd will provide.

All of the above?

Wasn't Gil and Kelly's old house rather ramshackle? It was my impression that before TLC money, they were quite far below the poverty line. Erin and Chad are falling victim to rising home costs just like so many other people are, but unlike people who actually work and still can't afford a house, I don't feel sorry for the Paines. Stop reproducing, you dolts!

I think we should give him a little slack about his wife, whom he clearly loves, passing out in labor. He lost his mother in childbirth, for crying out loud, and he's young and ignorant. It would be shocking if he DIDN'T associate losing his mother with what Josie was going through at that moment. It isn't as if he was the only person in the room, or even one of two people and the other had to help him. There were other people in the room to focus on Josie.

His given name is Charles, so they wouldn't have to change his birth certificate. Charles Something Paine IV, I believe.

I kind of like Erin's kid names. It's the only thing I like about her, actually. I'd rather have a Holland or Everly than the misspelled, cutesy monstrosities Alyssa inflicts on her daughters.

Still better than Rhett Golden Penis Webster.

I would bet a $5 Starbucks gift card that Layla didn't color that herself. That doesn't look like the work of a three-year-old. I think Carlin or Evan did that.

It was her first. I just rewatched that episode.

Surprisingly not trendee and uneek, especially for those two.

Kelly's probably stuck to the fainting couch right now. She might be there awhile.

To make matters worse, I think Kelton's mother delivered in a birthing center. Not to be morbid, but I wonder if she even survived long enough to make it to a hospital. Since Josie is still a fundie, and specifically a Bates, I always assumed that her "they never heard of my problem" was either gross exaggeration or an outright lie, Carlin-style, for attention.

"Her man." How about "her man" get a real job, or better yet, a real job and a vasectomy?

Does it still count as naked if she uses so many photo filters that she appears made of plastic?

Did the stick even dry before she started planning the curated photo shoot? I wish they'd have stopped at two.