CoyoteBlue

Oh, man, I wish there was a Clothed and Opinionated episode for this! Seth thinking he's hallucinating barbeque - cut to Bulent crunching his way through a roasted turtle. I would love to know how many days he survived without Suzanne. He ended up pretty much how I expected him to - crying weakly; or at least trying to but not having enough moisture to succeed. Dear god, I laughed so hard at him begging Bulent for water and then asking like he's being magnanamous offering the bow and arrows. Dude, he's gonna pluck those off your dead body and never look back. Keep pretending you're even participating in this thing. And then riding off into the sunset calling it "redemption!" like he wasn't just riding on Suzanne's coattails the entire time.

"bought in a convenience store on Highway 94" I think that phrase actuallly hurt my brain. Firstly, there is no such thing as stores on 94. It's a f-ing INTERSTATE. "just off of", sure. Not on. And secondly, it's 94 or the Edens. Maybe I-94. Get out of here with "Highway 94".

Mary is just eating this shit up. Maybe that where Brittani get her sociopath side from. Mary just keeps sipping her drunk and looking away and at no time does she defend her relationship. No "Look, he made a mistake, but he admitted it and we're trying to move part it, but your bullshit isn't helping. Let us worry about our marriage." HE KNOWS WHAT HE DID, BRITTANI. Stop talking like he doesn't. He admitted it, he's trying to move the relationship past that, STFU with the judginess. Frank, just run. Nothing you are getting from Mary can be worth it. And I'm just done with Sunhe and Angelica. The time to throw a passive-agressive hissy fit over the divorce and the ex's stuff was 1.5 years ago, not now. Now he's addressing everything. Accept it or don't.

"Watch this, Padma. You can actually pinpoint the second when his heart rips in half!"

Brittani's mom needs to let her grow up and stand on her own. No cop is going to get respect when they know her mommy washes her every day. And she needs some damn friends her own age. She's not freakishly large any more. That dead-eyed stare, though. Brittani is completely affectless. They're going to find Frank in pieces along a 20-mile stretch of interstate someday soon. (Wait, there are two siblings? Did Brittani make them disappear or did they get lives and move out?) And Mary just lets her get away with her smart-ass mouth with Frank. I think she likes setting Brittani on him so she can pretend she's not actually punishing him herself. Mary, either forgive him one fucking naked lap dance or break up with him. (I can't tell if they were claiming he boned the stripper or he just got the lap dance. Either way, shit or get off the pot, honey.) Sunghe: "And then you would find someone like me and that would be paradise" No... you mean "someone who agrees with me". Someone LIKE you would be a controlling, passive-aggressive bitch who would constantly interfere with all her other relationships. Angelica, so glad you seem to have grown a spine and are standing up for yourself against Mom a little. But you should have stayed the fuck out of Jason AND VIVIANA's divorce. That's none of your business; that's not Sunghe's business. Oh, god, Jason's a 'purse-dog and pedicures' guy? Disgusting moist slurping aside, Alana and Marcia just seems like a case of infantilization that the daughter doesn't want to give up yet. She's only 21, she's been through a lot in her life between her condition and starting life in a Russian orphanage (which can usually end in an attachment disorder, not an overabundance of attatchment), and she does live on her own and is going to college? And Marcia realizes that Alana needs to become independent, unlike some of these psycho moms. Kathy seriously drives five houses? Jesus, bitch, try walking instead of driving backwards an entire block on a residential street. These two need to get jobs or something; do something useful with themselves instead of living life from holiday to holiday to give their lives purpose. They also THRIVE on ambushing in public to put people who weren't socialized by wolves on the spot to placate them.

This is the first time I've watched XL and I think I might be watching it more for "Clothed and Opinionated" than anything else. They're hilarious, especially Jake and Lacey.

WHY DID I WATCH THE MARATHON?! Also, if I have to see the commercial for the next season where the one mom slobbers and slurps all over her daughter one more time, I might vomit.

I adore the man, but he cannot highlight an ingredient intentionally or hit a challenge to save his life. After a dozen "Delicious! But WTF does this have to do with the task?" you'd think he'd learn. Please learn before it takes you out, Bryan!

Funny that there's a post in the media thread about Buck and Eddie, because those two were too goddamn adorable in the photo booth together. Almost as adorable as that rescue beagle! Abby sucks. She and her old-lady glasses can disappear into her Eat Pray Ghost world for good. Internal decapitation! Very cool. Well, even cooler that the kid will live, but still, cool! I think May's going to ask Maddie about being a 911 operator. Would she really put off /give up college, though? Athena would go ballistic. Can you do that job summers and during breaks?

Yeah, before he took the high road, it sounded like he was trying to say his team was making bad choices and he should have "stepped in" (and I know it's probably just editing, but twice when Kevin was saying that, Bryan gave different, subtle "I'm sorry, what?" looks.). But we know Melissa and Bryan both tried on camera to get him to dial back. You know what's better than being the "captain that didn't jump in the lifeboat", Kev? Being the captain that didn't get his ship sunk. Still, good luck with LCK, sir.

I thought they gave a nod to that in that the inside manual safety was iced over. Although, who would just let that get that bad without defrosting it by hand from time to time in necessary? THIS, however, is not something they can handwave. It's like, PHYSICS, dammit.

Mandy doesn't get to angst about her informant and then harass his obviously hostile and distraught widow as Jason drags her out the door. Jesus, woman, read the room a little and don't be a raging asshole.

Those giant-ass 80's prom dress sleeves look good on absolutely no one. It's like they said "She's kinda pear-shaped, let's puff up her top half to match!" She looks like she's swimming in her clothes. For a minute, I was horrified thinking they would all hear Athena get raped over the radio before anyone could get there.

Malcolm is afraid he can kill and has spent his life ruthlessly making sure he doesn't, to the point where it paralyzes his ability to defend himself and/or his family. Ainsley found out she can and will kill to protect herself and her family and now has to figure out what to do with that knowledge - was it just normal self-defense, or the beginning of something darker and deeper?

I SWEAR TO GOD I WILL STOP WATCHING THE MINUTE CERBERUS IS OUT. No Cerberus or Brock? Pfft, that's all I'm watching for anymore. You want to use him as a ham-handed segue into Jason being too old and PTSDy for this? Fine. Better not follow-up on it, though.

If the gun is untraceable, they can make a case for Endicott threatening Malcolm and Ainsley attacking him out of fear for their lives.

"my business trades in the science of the human body. That's helped me realize that there's one form of leverage that trumps all the others. So I use it." Wouldn't be surprised if Nicholas managed to get DNA samples from the whole family and synthesize it in his labs. I think the missed opportunity was after Martin was arrested and while Gil was helping mentor Malcolm as a kid. She didn't feel worthy because of the whole 'dating a serial killer / not trusting love' thing. I assume the latter because that was his serial killer moniker before they knew who he actually was.

Actually Bald Guy decided he "ain't goin' back!", grabbed a gun and ran right towards a SWAT guy. Didn't make it - I remember them zipping up his body bag.

Oh thank christ I'm not the only one wondering when I missed them ruling that out. I'm neither a medical professional or a mother and I know about using cervical cerclage to keep the baby in and was wondering why they were all sitting around. Maybe she was in danger of abrupting, so they didn't want to seal her up yet? I wish they would have explained the delay.

Jason Beghe gives a PSA for All In Illinois. I did not know that's how his last name is pronounced.

Well, that'd put a wrinkle in his relationship with Eve.

I thought she was alive in the box and then once Malcolm saw her, Martin took both of them "camping" to get rid of her and see if he could get Malcolm to kill her / kill Malcolm if he couldn't get him to keep quiet.

But not for those big-ass puffy 80's sleeves on everything this episode. Isn't there supposed to be some kid-in-a-well thing happening? We've been seeing teasers for it for weeks.

Alessa, you BEAT that man's head in! Go, girl! You get 'em down, you make them STAY down. Eff some 'one smack and then turn your back on the guy while you check on Bright' BS some other minor female character might have tried. You know the score.

Bellamy Young just looks good then because she and Michael Sheen are 50 and 51 respectively. Tom Payne is 37 and Halston 26. Technically, the parent characters should probably be older than the actors are, given that Martin would have been such a famous surgeon and Jessica had a ten-year-old child twenty(?) years ago when Martin was caught. They would have had to start their family while Martin was still in med school probably?