buttersister

That was somewhat painful. Awkward. And embarrassing. But WTF was with that "vote" for bachelorette? I heard tons of applause for Caitlan and a smattering for Britt with Harrison calling it too close to call, so here they both are! B and S. On a happy note, I won't be watching either way. I tuned in tonight because I learned I was two degrees of separation from Whitney--and nobody knew if she had the ring or not. So for that, I guess, good for her. And good damn luck living in the middle of wherever, driving the combine and cranking out the kids. At least she'll have built-in babysitters for when she wants to get away to ... see her peeps in Chicago.

I'm sure Lonnie thinks she's being clever. They took down the big Clear Bar sign and put a small Underground Wonderbar sign in the window. It's 18" square tops and seems to have lots of colors on it--surprise! Hard to tell because it's hard to see from across the street (and it's too cold for me to cross over to take a closer look instead of going inside). Before Jon showed up, the outside of the building looked like the Lowe's paint department barfed on her walls and Lonnie was mighty proud of it (requests for a whitewash were not entertained). It also looks like there's live entertainment--of a woman dancing around the stage in a red skirt variety. Maybe her special brand of bar worked wherever she was before River North (where not everyone is rich, just saying). I can't say if business is up since the do-over but I don't know a soul around here who went in there before.

Is it a bad sign that I was on the phone for 90% of the episode? Lizzie, I'll tell you what--I don't care about you anymore. (Let's be fair, I never did.) Oh, Red, go around the world and have adventures without the FBI. I'd watch that. Previews had me all WTF? now all lead characters of every show are being auctioned off? (And no cracks about "great minds" I don't think that's exactly what's at work here.)

I wanted to like tonight's Chicago ep--I wanted to like Mary just for looking like a normal person. But the phobia about a master bedroom being too close to the kitchen? What was that? (Besides producer shenanigans, of course.) Her allergies that would attack if she was anywhere near carpeting--mysteriously disappeared when they moved into the house with carpet downstairs. And Show, if people can afford a 500K house, please do not make me hate you by implying that carpeting can't be replaced. I did love the last scene, though, when MJ and Mary were entertaining in their fabulous new kitchen and MJ brings in a handful of hotdogs he grilled (without tasty grill marks) on his brand new shiny gas grill. There's nothing else on the counter--no buns, veg, nothing--maybe they couldn't afford anything else?

People's hunch it would be Steven was about the only reason I tuned in. Run from the steaming pile of poo, Steven! So I was kinda happy that Liv was channeling me yelling at Fitz about what a fucking loser he is. Because, true. And then a little bit of me is hoping she's had enough of him. Jake creeped me out (again, some more). Her poppa's gone fishing. Her mama's watching TV in the hole. So maybe Show becomes about Olivia the Fixer again. And she drinks her reds alone for awhile.

I kept wondering if he was making as much as Joe offered him. And I'm looking at a restaurant down the block in a location that was previously a revolving door for meh places. You do it right, right you are. Oh yeah, I thought that guy was going to have a stroke when Tim suggested they move to Oklahoma!

They improved the hell out of the outside of tonight's home. I missed the set up (dogs!) but my cable guide said the husband was a pastor--Church of the Hat? I understand different vernacular for different folks, but the youse guys has got. to. stop. Edited to ask if Jo has a warehouse full of farm sinks--cause they're probably not hauling those out.

Not a lot made sense. And Spader tilted his head so much I was forced to consider it's a good thing he doesn't suffer from vertigo. Or he does and wanted to see how dizzy he could get as a distraction from the script.

Too bad the realtor didn't show it to them before they bought their actual place? Small budget people with no imagination + producer's notes + delusion = low budgets and great big wishlists.

Sorry, Kim, can't go there with you. Fitz looks like the fucking piece of shit Shonda made him. To me, anyway. Huck is a low-functioning psychopath and Jake's all-business beheading puts him right there, too. Perhaps Shonda wrote this before the real-life beheadings started, but woman, WTF? Re-shoot! So what am I left with here? Mellie. Joe Morton's scenery chewing. Mellie and Poppa Pope Save the World? Maybe I'd watch that, but I don't think I can watch anymore of this. Not sure I can convert to a hate-watcher, either. (And I, too, after a few episodes, bailed on HTGAWM--no thanks.)

Bet her parents love having those grandkids around all the time. Smooth move, folks. Plus, two tasty restaurants in town where you can always get a table. Good for them.

As noted, I had it at Tom: Best dessert I ever ate on this show. While I would have been good with either one of them winning (because I thought they'd done well all season), I was a little surprised at how happy I was for Mei's win. Of them all, her dishes were the ones I looked forward to seeing. (As well as Doug, who I hope shows up for an all-star appearance.) I'll give it to M. Volt for his mighty fine reaction to her phone call (you're the chef now). Can Blais go away now? Yes, Ripert inhales aromas, but he's Eric Fucking Ripert and Blais is not. in. the. same. league. His comments don't add anything, his hair is distractingly stupid, and his attitude sucks. Plus, he's taking up space that used to go to Ripert or Keller or somebody interesting. Otoh, he doesn't threaten Tom's dominance, does he?

Okay, I watched Jon make the announcement and now there's an awful lot of fluid streaming down my face. My Jon love continues.

Nooooooooooo. Crap.

If there's no French-style bakery nearby, but there is a Trader Joe's, look for frozen kouign amann--requires hours of rising, but then, that may be the reason they turn out. I was pleased to see Richard get his mojo back.

Looks like Mary double owes Anna--she burned the damn ticket and it's her cunning device. Hope that's a new talkin' 'do, Mar, cause you're going to have to undo some shit.

Perhaps these douches/judges are the cooking-show equivalent of the house buyers on HH--following a script? Only instead of wanting granite counter tops and ss appliances, they don't want red onions or un-transformed dried fruit?

Boyd backed into a corner? Dillahunt anywhere, anytime? Evil Elliott? Raylan's eye on some prize (Boyd? Death? Hanging it up?)? If this has to end, this is the way to do it. (Good luck, Ava!)

Ha, Patti, fess up, dear, to the difference between "celebrities" and "TV famewhores." You, surfer dude and Manzo Basement Denizen are the latter. Not that two out of three of you give a shit. I have a hunch that not-gettting-any-younger Chris would just as soon keep his boring self to himself. Mom looks like she's been keeping a lot of procedure appointments if her current look can be compared with Original RHoNJ. Was there a "financial adviser" caption over Max? LOL! I do miss the old assistants, though--they were a constant reminder that this was a comedy show.

I may have already walked--have only seen bits and may pass On Demand--Fitz is accepting casualties to save Olivia? That's Cheney/Halliburton-level evil. He was a POS before this, how is his character at all redeemable now? How is this show?

Food slicer woman reminded me of the Diane Keaton character in Baby Boom---a classic over-achiever who came up with something to Get Herself Back In--without a Sam Shepard to mellow her cray. Glad she got what she wanted if only because she WANTED IT so much and was going home to those kids.

The Power of Spader got me to watch this live, mostly. Looks like they're traveling Bauer-time, but since I had no idea why they were in Alaska, I didn't care. Lame agent Keen is my problem--imagine how much more powerful those scenes with Red would have been with a better actress. She was even boring in her head with herself as a little girl. Otoh, I've always like Straithairn, so between he and all of other actors (minus whatshername), we'll see how this goes.

Removes any suspense the elves woefully try to create. As much as I like Doug, he was asleep at the wheel when the ingredients were being grabbed and got the short end. Since I have no idea what ant eggs taste like--nor am I ever likely to--it's hard to say if their true taste coming through would have seemed to him to be a good idea (as opposed to trying multiple preparations of said eggs). I thought his egg to the egg power was clever, sorry it didn't work out for him. It seemed like one of the guest chefs (I'm not counting Blais) "got" what Mei was getting at with her avocado. Happy that she made it and think that the Mei-Gregory battle could be a really strong one.

Well, good for her if she can get those prices (I'm pretty sure I've seen some of that--or close to it--at both Marshall's and Home Goods). I guess I should have figured that the homeowners' $$ didn't extend to her decorating, but it's such a relief not to see holy trinity entitled asses wandering through homes with their stink faces on that I put away my critical hat. ETA: Occasionally.

I noticed tonight that the y'alls came out when a "can we go over budget" phone call got made. So now I couldn't help but wonder what was up with all of the bedrooms and bathrooms in the growing family's house. And Jo's carpenter custom made those cute bar chairs to match the mantle, but all I could think when Jo was talking about them is that she was doing a nice job of selling them! I like these guys, sts, but there was an awful lot of filler shtick, so I'm hoping that's not how the whole season is going to go.