ElectricBoogaloo

Man, all I could think when the dogs started barking was DO NOT HURT THE DOGGIES!!! When Buster took off, I was terrified that this fictional dog might get fake hurt. I can only imagine Hannibal cackling with glee when he realized that no matter who died as a result of that confrontation, he was still going to come out the winner.

Hannibal: Why don't you appeal to my better nature? Will; I wasn't aware you had one. Hannibal: No one can be fully aware of another human being unless we love them. With that love we see potential in our beloved. Through that love we allow our beloved to see their potential. Expressing that love, our beloved's potential comes true. Hannibal: Therapy only works when we have a genuine desire to know ourselves as we are, not as we would like to be.

Where do I begin? I suppose Crazy Swayze aka PeeWee. How in the world do you end up with not one but two horrible nicknames? Oh yeah, you encourage them and get tattoos of Patrick Swayze's headstone. Aside from marrying a 21 year old he met on the internet without ever seeing her in person before the wedding, he seemed like a nice guy. Then again, the bar has been set really low by this show. I expect most gypsy men who agree to be shown on camera to be ignorant assholes. In comparison, Crazy Swayze seems relatively normal. You know, for a guy with a tattoo of Patrick Swayze's headstone on his chest. So was Swayze being delusional/romantic by not wanting to meet Brittany until their wedding day? Or is he afraid that if she sees him in person, she will change her mind? Between the color andthe ruffled shirt, that orange tuxedo was horrifying. And telling Brittany that her wedding dress had to have orange was terrible! I mean, I love color but I wasn't about to have a brightly colored wedding gown. I felt bad that she had such trouble walking because she's never worn high heels before. Why on earth were the groomsmen all wearing pastel suits? And if their mishmash of colors wasn't bad enough, three of them had to accessorize with baseball caps. Classy! Swayze's mom is an abusive asshole. You should not be chasing your 27 year old son and trying to smack him. While I understand being apprehensive about your child marrying someone he has never met in person, saying that you will NEVER like her before you have even met her is a dick move. She clearly had no intention of ever giving Cassity a chance. And that's what really annoys me about many of the gypsies on these shows - they complain about gorgers judging them for being gypsies and being prejudiced but so many of them clearly have nothing but contempt and disdain for non-gypsies. They're such hypocrites - those people are so horrible for judging me and making assumptions about me but it's totally okay for me to do it! Anyway, his mom is a crazy bitch. When she was screaming at him about being an embarrassment, it was clear that this woman has no self awareness at all. When she later attacked Brittany, it was just ridiculous. First of all, Brittany was not to blame for Swayze saying that Lottie was an embarrassment. She wasn't even there when it happened. Secondly, when Lottie asked Brittany if Swayze tought Brittany's family was embarrassing, all I could think was well, probably not since they're not the ones screaming and making a scene at a wedding. Interesting that at the beginning of the episode, the narrator said Brittany was a single mom and showed her with one kid, but later in the episode one of the groomsmen said that Brittany had two kids and Swayze had one kid. Despite this, we never saw Brittany's second kid or Swayze's kid. Hopefully it's because the other parents wouldn't sign a release for their kids to appear on camera. The twins! Who in the hell names their kids Brittain and Bryceton? Those aren't names! I thought their sister got off easy until I saw that her name was spelled Cassity. Good lord. I felt bad for her because her brothers would not STFU while she was trying to practice. Quit hassling her and let her practice! I do feel bad for her brothers though. It's going to be rough for them when they realize that they're gay. This show is so fake though. The brothers can't even keep their stories straight. First they say they didn't know Cassity snuck out of the house to go to a party. Then the next day they say that they told her not to go to that "get together" and she didn't listen. To be fair, I think only of the brothers was being a bossy drama queen but I couldn't be bothered to keep track of their outfits so I could tell them apart. But it did seem like one of them was doing 95% of the complaining and drama queening while the other one mostly just sat there. On a shallow note, I hate their Bieber hair. I couldn't decide if it was sad or funny that the show kept saying that Cassity was competing to win a college scholarship and then they showed her with $54 cash and the voiceover lady said she was one step closer to a college scholarship. They made it sound like the rodeo competition had a scholarship as a grand prize, not that they were going to hand over a fistful of small bills.

I think this is the episode where I officially stopped caring what happens to any of these morons. Matt and Jeremy, both of whom I usually love, are not at all concerned that Tyler hasn't been seen or heard for at least a day? It's more likely that it's been longer since the previous episode ended but I know better than to try to use logic when it comes to the timeline on this show. And they know that the traveler knife is missing but they don't think to tell anyone else? Damon was right to call them Tweedledee and Tweedledumber this week. At least they obeyed his orders and stayed at home. Elena was totally useless again this week. Her only purpose was to serve as bait and angst some more about Damon. Bonnie waited THAT long to try to call/text Damon? I guess maybe she thought Enzo would get bored and just leave? The one thing Stefan did this week that I liked was not trying to sugar coat that he killed Enzo. I mean technically, he DID kill Enzo but it was definitely Enzo's choice. He could have hemmed and hawed when telling Elena what happened, so at least he was honest with her. But of course that was ruined by Stefan deciding to keep Enzo's death a big secret from Damon. His rationalization of "we just got him back" isn't a good enough reason to not only lie but to tell everyone else the truth and then swear them to secrecy too. When Damon said something to Liz about Enzo being his only friend, I was hoping the camera would pull back and show Ghost Alaric standing there shaking his head. Honestly, I'm okay with Bonnie dying, mostly because they haven't given her much to do this season anyway.

So how many push up bra corsets does Kenna have? I swear, every time they showed her in her bedroom, she was wearing a different one. Thank goodness there's a Victoria's Secret near the castle.

Francis: It's father. He's gone utterly mad. Catherine: Define "utterly" because this is a man who's ridden a pig through the throne room in nothing but his underthings.

I'll be honest - when I first started watching this show, it was a weird spiteful curiosity. I was mad ABC canceled Eyes (don't worry if you have no idea what I'm talking about because I'm probably the only person on the planet who watched that show) but they kept Grey's (which premiered the same season). Over time, it became a show I watched out of habit. Every fall, I say that I'm not going to watch anymore and then I end up doing it anyway. I don't hate it but I don't love it. It's in this weird middle ground where it's capable of making me laugh (like when Callie yelled, "Get out of my vagina, Kepner!") or making me want to stab someone in the eye (ghost Denny, Cristina and Owen's gross merry go round of fucking and then fighting about not having kids). But I feel like this is the episode where I turned the corner and almost everyone annoyed me. First, the parents were all driving me crazy. if I have to watch the mom of the three kids cry one more time, I may lose it. Part of me was so annoyed that the first criticized Cristina because of their kids' various states of ill health, as if it's somehow her fault, and then they wanted her to decide who to give the donor heart to. I am also over the bubble kid's mom getting hysterical while two feet away from the kid's partition. YOU KNOW HE CAN HEAR YOU, RIGHT? I understand that she's freaking out, but for fuck's sake, you are this kid's mother. Get a hold of yourself, woman! Do you think that it's good for your sick kid to witness you having breakdowns on a regular basis? How hard is it to lower your voice or just walk a few feet away if you're getting upset? But don't just stand right next to the plastic partition where your kid can see and hear you freaking out yet again. The various board members need to grow up and realize that Jackson is not being the foundation's lackey or tattletale. He is trying to HELP his coworkers but they act like he's sabotaging them. He is totally correct - the foundation asked for this information so he and the board can either make the decision and then try to steer the foundation in the direction or they can just let the foundation decide on their own. Either way, this is happening so the better option is not to bury their heads in the sand and hope it just goes away. April is back to her full on annoying self. If you want to obsess about your issues with Jackson, that's your business but you don't need to repeat the EXACT same thing over and over to the people who are kind enough to let you stay with them while you figure things out. The first ten times were probably enough. I also loathe when Shonda uses that lame "the patient's story parallels the doctor's story and somehow makes the doctor realize the truth" method of storytelling because it's lazy. So when April started going on and on during surgery until she started crying, I just wanted to tell her to STFU and act like an adult. Yes, it sucks that you're having problems with your husband, but you are AT WORK. Act like a professional and do your job without crying in the OR. The few times that I've seen Derek's sister on this show, I haven't liked her. This episode didn't change my opinion at all. The only thing I can recall enjoying about this episode was Meredith's tirades. Heh, Dr. Sucksalot.

Callie: Kepner, get out of my vagina!

Stefan: Did I say Damon? I meant...George. Jeremy: Whose nasty ass boxers are under the couch? Matt: Not mine. I actually do my laundry. Damon: I've got two brain dead teenagers who didn't realize two plus two equals one hijacked hybrid. Well, what do you say? Field trip? I'm sure there's some salvage yard we haven't toured yet. I think it's a little too dangerous to let Tweedledee and Tweedledumber out of the house. Enzo: Too many witches under one roof makes me nervous. Damon: Whoa, Enzo, you have your murder voice on. Liz: Why the sudden interest in Mystic Falls history? Damon: You know when your brother kills your only friend's girl and you're stuck in the middle? Enzo: Whose side are you on? Damon: There are sides now?

Ginuwine: Lil Sebastian, this one is for you because you're my pony. Andy: I can't believe Michael Bay spent $1 billion of his own money to build [Alcatraz] for The Rock. Ginuwine: Damn, Donna. Why you gotta bring the Quackson Five into this?

Heh, I totally agree with Bourdain about EDM (and I say this as someone who used to work in a club). It's a lot of flashing lights and douchebags. I really enjoyed the segment at the bar with the retro singer. It's always nice to see something in Vegas that isn't just gambling, hookers, or partying. I liked the low key vibe.

ITA - he really is the only triple threat in the cast and he has been sadly underutilized. I'm glad he had an opportunity to show his singing and dancing skills in NYC. Jane Lynch really surprised me. I have learned to dread her musical numbers. She is enthusiastic, which I definitely appreciate, but she has demonstrated over the seasons that she is not a good singer or dancer. Her singing is usually overly autotuned and her dancing tends to be very stiff and tentative. Apparently being in Annie has helped her a lot because her singing has really improved. She still scoops too much for my taste, but I could definitely hear the difference in her voice. Her dancing is still not great, but she looks much more confident and she moves more easily than she used to. They still had to camouflage her dancing with the usual long shots and cut aways. On a related note, I love that the show is no longer even trying to hide Rachel's substandard dancing. It cracks me up that now they don't edit out her spazzy dancing. I could have done without Sue's entire storyline. I didn't find it interesting or funny at all. I love Dr. Leo Spaceman and he seemed like a nice guy but when your new lover is accused of being a horrible person who enjoys the suffering of teenagers and the entire room applauds, how can you honestly then tell your new lady friend that you don't think any of it is true? You've known this woman for how many hours? And you have a better idea of her character than kids who have been tormented by her for three years? Ooookay.

Sue: There's a scab on the face of America. It's an island. It's shaped like a dong and smells like hot pee. Sue: You said patron. Are you a sex worker? Mario: If I wanted to watch a show about an ugly duckling who gets dumped, I'd just watch an episode of Girls.

Skye: Police report out of Morocco, attempted murder. The victim says the guy appeared out of nowhere, disappeared into thin air. Koenig: Yeah, you just described every mugging ever. Koenig: Aren't you clever? Skye: Aren't you sneaky? Skye: Oh, I thought you were a comms agent, not agent of playing video games while hiding in a bunker. Skye: You can't choose to feel. Ward: Usually I can. It's different with us. Skye: Us is a strong word. I mean, I know I kissed you but to be fair I thought there was a 97% chance we were going to DIE. Ward: [specialists] are all cut from the same cloth. Skye: Black kevlar? May's mom: 500 miles and I don't even get a thank you. May: I was just about to- May's mom: It's too late. May: Thank you. May's mom: I said, "Too late."

As soon as they showed Elijah after the bomb, the first thing I thought was nooooo, the suit! At this point, I almost expect him to have a spare suit with him at all times. He and Barney Stinson could bond over their love of suits. When Hayley just walked into the vampire lair by herself armed with only one stake, I thought what are these chicken shit vampires doing? Why are they just standing around? There are way more of them than there are of her. Surely they could each grab one limb and restrain her! But no, they just let her manhandle Diego and then walk away. If that's what they're like without Marcel or the Mikaelsons, no wonder they require strong leadership. I'm so glad Josh is still around. Watching him compel the doctor was the funniest compulsion scene in five seasons of TVD and one season of this show. I love that he is still learning how to use his vampire powers. One thing that annoyed me was the doctor claiming that electroshock therapy is dangerous. It's not 1950 anymore. It's also not painful when it's done by a doctor. Patients are given anesthesia and muscle relaxers. I hate when tv and films perpetuate the myth that it's painful and dangerous. I totally cracked up when Hayley demanded Oliver take off his shirt. If we're going to be stuck with this werewolf storyline,then I agree - at least have the dudes take their shirts off once per episode. Jackson can eat a big bag of dicks. After Elijah spent the better part of the day helping the injured werewolves, Jackson then has the nerve to ask, "Is this the peace you promised us?" Dude, you are the one who went behind his back (knowing that Hayley had already signed a blood oath) to make a deal with someone else. If your pack isn't going to adhere to the peace treaty, then why should the other parties? You're the only one who's allowed to strike dirty deals under the table? Poor uncle Kieran. I kind of wish they had let him transition and become a crazy hexed vampire priest because he would have been good at it and it would give us something more interesting than watching people sign treaties and threaten each other but never doing much. I did not feel sorry for Oliver AT ALL when he said that he didn't agree to the massive destruction that resulted from his deal with whoever (I'm assuming it was Francesca based on what Marcel said). You agreed to let someone attack your family members in their homes to get them riled up so you could take over, but oh no, it was more than you bargained for? Boo hoo, you psycho. If Oliver becomes the leader, does that mean I don't have to listen to Jackson's flat froggy weird voice anymore? Because I'd be willing to make that trade. Klaus was kinder than usual with Cami and Kieran. I'm guessing we won't see that again for a while. Although I'm not a Cami fan, I'm glad that both Marcel and Klaus were willing to put aside their differences at the beginning and end of the episode to help her through this. It's hard to imagine that Klaus knows what it's like to deal with the death of someone you love. He just daggers his family members and carts them around until he's ready to let them out. When Kol was killed, I felt that Klaus was more concerned with his indigation about "how dare you insult my family this way?" than actually mourning the loss of his brother.

Doctor: What the hell? Josh: Oh, okay, yeah, totally seeing how we a crime scene vibe happening here. Just don't freak out, okay? Klaus: Think very carefullly before you speak. The sound of your voice is likely to make me forget what mercy I've shown thus far. Marcel: Yeah, yeah, I know I'm on your who's been naughty list. Doctor: I'm going to have to let the authorities know what the hell is going on here. Cami: Josh? Josh: Oh, right. Dude, be cool. It's just a priest hexed by a witch because of some vampires. Accept that these things are real, then forget them. I mean later. You forget them later. Crap, let me start over. Hayley: As fun as it is to imagine Klaus changing dirty diapers, I'm pretty sure that I'll be doing this alone. Elijah: Pardon the interruption. I wonder if I might have a quick word with the conspirators of a supposed uprising. Hayley: Give me your shirt. NOW! Hayley: Since I don't see any genius mastermind types around here, why don't you just tell me where Marcel is and we can both get on with our day? Elijah: Unfortunately in troubled times, people do not look for the best but rather the loudest.

What I love about this show is that the most absurd things are totally realistic. Even though I don't work in tech or Silicon Valley, I still appreciate the true to life aspects that they depict - the insanity of a google-esque workplace, insanely high property values that force grown men to be roommates, the hierarchy within the employees with the bullying programmers, realizing that having your own company requires a lot of things that most people don't know how to do on their own, etc. This week I liked the storyline with someone else already having the same businses name. I work in a small industry where this happens all the time (people using the same names, not the negotiation part) so it always drives me crazy when people who don't understand trademark law get their panties in a bunch out of ignorance. Prime examples: (1) people who sided with One Direction when it came out that a small band in California had already been using the name and (2) the people who said the owner of Blue Ivy boutique should just be glad that she was getting publicity from Beyonce and Jay-Z applying to trademark the name Blue Ivy in just about every category possible. Gabe once again proved that he is good at business. The first thing you do when you choose a business name is check to see if anyone else is already using it. That's before you file any kind of paperwork, print business cards, make shirts, etc. You can check the trademark registry but you also need to just google the crap out of it and see if there's anything similar (words reversed, alternate spellings, that kind of thing). I see so many people who completely skip this step and then have the nerve to be outraged and upset that someone else had THE GALL to use this name before they did. It's called due diligence and you didn't bother with it, so you can't really be mad that someone else came up with the same name before you did. I liked that Richard's solution was the simplest and most forthright: drive down to Gilroy and talk to this guy. But I also liked that later when the farmer showed up at his house, he took a few steps forward on the asshole scale (per Ehrlich's instructions) and refused to pay the higher price. But I do think that if he had used his previous tactic and just talked to the guy when he asked for $250K and said that he was not an internet billionaire who could afford that kind of money for the name, that he was just starting out and couldn't even cash his "big" check or afford to move out of a house he shares with five dudes, the farmer probably would have responded more cooperatively. I wasn't sure how I would feel about this show, but at this point I'm in for the whole season!

I personally would be offended if my husband treated me like a six year old who had just misbehaved but YMMV. I wouldn't want to be scolded or patronized by the person who is my life partner and my equal. I'm not looking for things. They just keep throwing their terrible behavior around for me to see.

This is the most accurate and succinct summary of Glee. I sometimes find myself watching a new episode and asking, "What the hell happened?" It's like finding out that a nice friend from elementary school became a drug dealer and is now in jail for murder charges. How did you get from here to there? And then there's the sadness of knowing that something good and sweet with so much potential has turned into this unholy mess that you barely recognize.

Dave and Connor need to understand that there is a difference between not helping someone and actively sabotaging someone. In regular life, it's nice to be nice. But when you are competing for a buttload of money, your fellow competitors are not obligated to help you. That doesn't make them mean or bad people. The blondes are totally useless. I loathe women who love to perpetuate the helpless female stereotype. We're terrible at navigating! We can't do these puzzles! Help us! Ugh. Learn to stand on your own two feet, you nitwits. If you are racing around the world for the second time, you KNOW that you will have to drive yourselves at some point. Practice. Learn. It's a great life skill to have so that you don't have to sit in the passenger seat your whole life saying, "My husband does all the driving, tee hee!" What really annoyed me this week is that they didn't even have to navigate. They just had to follow Dave and Connor and they couldn't even do that correctly. And even then they still didn't have to navigate much (meaning read a map). The guy at the hotel printed written directions for them so all they had to do was read them and follow them and they couldn't do that either! As if their total incompetence wasn't bad enough, once a truck got between them and Dave/Connor, their first instinct was to assume that the guys deliberately tried to ditch them. Talk about paranoid bitches. Rachel and Brendon raced smart but they're still annoying. "I'm an artiste!" STFU! And Brendan loud whispering encouragement to her during the calligraphy was totally annoying. I had to pause the episode to tell Mr. EB that if we are ever in that situation, he'd better not do that. Brendon crossed the line to offensive when he made Rachel repeat what he was saying. What kind of a man treats his wife like a child? I mean, she acts like one but still.

ITA - the bickering can be fun to watch on a tv show when there are witty writers behind the banter (see: S1-2 of Moonlighting) but constantly arguing and a pregnancy scare should not be signs that point to "GET MARRIED."So the baby shoes are the Warehouse version of the Harry Potter pensieve? There was too much time spent on Claudia and her sister, and it was really weird for them to spend all this time talking about her family and showing family flashbacks without a single mention of Joshua. If he wasn't available to film, that's fine, but they couldn't throw in one line from Claudia like, "Joshua needs to know that our sister is alive" or "I just called Joshua in France and he's freaked out too"? I hate the Myka/Pete shipper anvils anvils. While I know it's definitely possible for two friends to suddenly realize that they're perfect for each other, that should be a show me, not a tell me. I don't want Myka and Pete to think oh hey, those other partners fell in love so maybe we're totally in love and we just don't know it! Blech. Please let them just stay friends. If they want to be BFFs who have a baby together, I don't have a problem with that, but I don't want some contrived romance.

Pete: What about me? Myka: Pete? Right. See? I already have a child. Pete: No, I mean you could have kids with me. We could totally do it without even having sex. Myka: That's...enticing. Pete: How about this? If in ten years, neither of us has found anyone- Myka: Oh, a murder-suicide pact. That's a great idea! Ted: After the whole museum thing, guys at the office had a pool going - hook up or kill each other. Pete: Neither one so far, but I wouldn't rule out both. Myka: I liked it better when you just stared at my boobs. Myka: You know, I am so glad that we have boundaries. Work is work and personal is personal. It's much better that way. Pete: Boundaries, yup, we work together every day and live next door to each other in a B&B.

I LOATHED that they used "Royals" during Lola's wedding reception. I thought it was cute when Gossip Girl had the freshman girls sing "Glamorous" accapella way back in S1. I even liked it when The Vampire Diaries used an instrumental version of "How to Save a Life" at Tyler's dad's funeral. I'm not opposed to the CW using songs in a new way (and I even liked the way A Knight's Tale used contemporary music) but for some reason, I hated the use of "Royals" in this episode. I can just imagine the producers sitting around a table giggling about how funny and clever it would be use a song called "Royals" on a show about royals and patting themselves on the back. I will concede that the choreography in that scene was MUCH better than the dance scene in A Knight's Tale though. I agree that somehow Bash and Kenna are interesting together even though I didn't like them individually before they got married. It's some sort of witchcraft! Poor Nostradamus. He will never be free. Penelope was fun at first but she quickly became a one note villain, so I have been bored with her for the last few weeks. I'm glad that Catherine and Kenna ousted her, but it seems stupid that all they did was send her back to the kitchen. How do they know she won't try to retaliate? She could try to poison their food or pay one of the other servants to get revenge somehow. I don't think that the show will allow Bash and Kenna to leave permanently so I wonder what kind of complication they will come up with keep them at court. I don't think they will let Lola just run off forever either, so I'm sure they will have to create a reason for her to stay and have the baby be around Mary and Francis indefinitely. I suspect that Lola's husband is probably broke and he's hiding it from her. Both of his rich wives dying makes me fear that Lola will be next. I was also afraid that once he found out she delayed approving the dowry transfer, he would turn into a crazy violent lunatic. As always, Catherine and Henri are the best. They always amuse me, even when they're creeping me out. I love that despite their differences, Catherine knows him well enough to know exactly how to get to him. Edited because these line breaks are still killing me!

When Dee let Catherine borrow her coat, I thought for sure that there would be backlash against the Presidential candidate's daughter wearing fur and that it might be part of the SNL skit. I loved JLD's intentionally terrible acting during the SNL skit too. I know that there has been some debate about everyone crapping on Jerry on Parks & Rec but on Veep, it is universally accepted by every character regardless of their affiliation or loyalties that Jonad is THE WORST and we as the audience have seen multiple examples of why people hate him, which makes it so enjoyable when a character who is normally slimy and loathsome like Leon is more than happy to agree to Amy's request to hit Jonah in the head with a fire extinguisher. I'm not always a fan of Catherine being included, mostly because it's sad to see her be disappointed for the millionth time, but I really liked that her pep talk to Selina was essentially "I put up with your crap and neglect for all these years so make it worth my fucking while by getting your shit together and achieving the ultimate goal!" I know that certain aspects of this show are not realistic, but how realistic would it be for a divorced single woman to run for President? I have no issue with it, but it seems like they would want her to have a husband in order to present a family friendly image. Always lovely to see Tracie Thoms, who will always be Majandra from Wonderfalls to me!

Amy: Okay, great pee! Dan: I want to know who's responsible for that sketch, you cock--- tail napkin. Yeah, you heard me. Senator Doyle: I have a meeting scheduled with the Vice-President right now and it is right now right now. Senator Doyle: Do I look like I rode in on the last fuck truck? Selina: What's a fuck truck? Senator Doyle: Oh, so we can say anything now? All right, we can say we can heal the sick. We can turn water into blow jobs. Senator Doyle: Put the AARP on those steps. Seniors vote. They've got nothing else to do. Selina: You want me to be some kind of party puppet? You can stick your hand up my ass and work my mouth? Senator Doyle: Yes, please! Selina: And what were you bobbleheads doing while I was just getting ear fucked by Father Time? D: No, the D don't stand for anything. That's like me asking you what does Mike stand for? Mike: It stands for Mike kind of guy. Selina: What in the wide world of fuck do you think you're wearing? Leon: Amy, what is this bushel of fuck talking about? Amy: Leon, would you mind smashing his head off with a fire extinguisher? Leon: I wouldn't mind. Ben: I see you've found it - the room of regret. Mike: I'm fucked, Ben. I'm fucked. Ben: Well, there's a remedy. It's an ancient technique and it's been plied by lovable losers since way back. It's called begging. Mike: Jonah? That fucking lowlife? Ben: That fucking lowlife? You gotta go lower. You gotta go lower than the lowest lowlife. You gotta dig and dig and dig until you wish you were dead. And that's base camp. Catherine: How long has she been like this? Gary: Forever. Dan: Fifteen minutes. Sue: This is your beauty pageant of the nearly dead.