nosedive

Just sayin...

Another season of this crapfest, another season of my husband rolling his eyes that I watch. It's like picking a scab. We know we shouldn't be doing it, but just can't help ourselves. Some questions and observations: Was anyone else cringing for that poor piano that was being clumsily manhandled? Or should I say teen-handled. Aren't there specialty movers for pianos? I pity the piano tuner who gets stuck with that job. And who among them plays piano, anyway? Except for the circus that accompanies her, I would prefer Meri living next door to me over any of the others, if only for the reason she seems to take good care of her property. But then again, there would be the inevitable tight-yoga-panted, unshaven armpitted Moriah sightings. Never mind. I rescind my welcome. I'm no electrician, but it would have occurred to me that running three freezers off the same zone would more than likely eventually, and repeatedly, overload the circuit. Twelve-hundred pounds of rotting animal flesh. Meri's neighbors have no idea of the bullet they dodged. Who willingly jumps into BROWN water???? Are these people completely braindead? And what's with Kody's wonder and awe that a once-empty hole is now filled, as though God, Himself, performed this as a sign just for them. Brown water for the Brown family. Just like speaking to Moses from the burning bush. And speaking of which... What teenaged girl wants to see her adult brother or worse, her father, in his skivvies? And wet skivvies, at that? At least Gabe has gravity in his favor. Kody tells us he'll be keeping up the regular rotation. So every seventh night, he'll trek four hours to Las Vegas to give Meri her due? So now it occurs to Kody that leaving behind four unsold homes, purchasing a massive plot of land, buying or renting four very large homes without having finances secured might have been a harebrained idea? Kody, you're wasting your talents. NASA needs minds like yours. Whoever loans these grifters money shouldn't be surprised when this show ends and they don't recover a dime because the Kodsters have filed for bankruptcy. And then they'll file a suit against the manufacturer of The White Board, upon which this whole scheme was launched. Surely, it's their anti-polygamist conspiracies that are behind the failure of Kody's Perfect Plan. Next time you need a white board, Kody, make sure it's from a pro-plyg company. Phew! I feel better getting that off my chest. And sadly, I'm in for the duration.

Bwahahaha! Yuck... but not beyond the realm of belief.

Vicki is, and always has been, insufferable. If Andy doesn't set her straight during Reunion Three regarding her self-proclaimed role as originator of this series, I will be sorely disappointed (preferably, followed by dismissing her to the Green Room while the others remain). Kelly has her flaws, but if I had to choose between her and either Vicki or Tamra, she'd be my choice, hands down. At least she has a functioning heart, unlike the Dos Amigas, who surely have nothing other than black, shriveled up vestiges of decency in their chest cavities. Shannon would be wise to salvage what's left of her humanity and distance herself before those two emotional vampires succeed in re-creating her in their image.

Too bad Dr. Seuss isn't still around. I see a sequel to Green Eggs and Ham.

Or the three Abuelas.

Except Paul Lynde meant to be funny! He also reminds me of Liberace.

I’m baffled by how one person, namely Gina, can be so utterly vapid and boring, yet so irritating at the same time. Please Bravo, make her go away. Emily’s arm draped over Gina’s shoulder at the party was a strange posture, as if she were assuming possession of her. I don’t believe Tamra has one shred of decency in her. The only satisfaction I get from her continued participation in this show is watching her look more and more like her mother with each passing year.

I don't know where you're getting your information, but this is patently untrue.

Observations: Sonja and Barbara nearly touching noses during their convo. Apparently, they take personal space cues from Ramona. Luanne's necklace - precious, if it was a Mother's Day gift from a 5-year old. Otherwise, hideous. Either Luanne has a never-ending head cold and wipes her nose red or her sobriety is selective. Final Score: 0 for self-awareness. 6 for shrillness. 9 for hypocrisy. 10+ for increasing local economy in sales of booze and Allegra (you could practically smell the mold). Extra points for minimal Ramona.

If there were any lingering doubt about Teresa, last night proved she is unhinged and detached from reality, the latter, in my opinion, is by her own choice. Was Jennifer boasting about spending $40K on furnishings for her faux Opera House? That amount of cash is a pittance for a house of that size, even without purchasing high end stuff. High Def TV is no friend to facial pores.

LOL! Okay, I'll show mercy.

Now that we've pulled back the veil, we might as well totally embrace it.

So sorry!

To me he looks and sounds like Corey Feldman.

Everything about her is fake, inside and out. Why someone would "reinvent" herself into an utter twat is puzzling.

High School Dorit

Yes! Lady Elaine Fairchilde. The Real Housewives of Mr. Rogers' Neighborhood.

Regarding the alleged $325,000 paid to Teresa and Joe to appear on WWHL, wouldn't that be subjected to federal and NJ state income taxes, which must be close to 50%, given Teresa's income bracket based on her salary from the show alone? If that's the case, and I can't imagine why they wouldn't have to pay taxes on it (although, obviously, a new thing for them), plus FICA, etc., they'd walk away with less than half of that amount, I'm calculating in the $140,000s. Enough to make a dent in the $400,000 restitution due, but they'd still owe more than they earned from their WWHL gig.