ivygirl

I heard one of them just broke up with a woman named Megan. Anyhoo, I wonder if Tom’s absence is causing Ariana anxiety because, subliminally, she’s wondering what he’s up to when he’s away. Kind of like a kiss that “never happened” (except, as we learned, it did) at the Golden Nugget.

I’m convinced that, had Dorit not run her mouth, this could have been the conversation: Teddi: Yeah, I thought it was weird that’s you left. Erika: Well, I felt weird leaving, so we’re even. Teddi (TH): it was super weird that she left. I said I didn’t mind if people stayed in a hotel. Erika (TH): So it was weird. I think she’s weird for caring. And then they could have dredged it up at the reunion.

I hadn’t had the bad fortune of seeing that dress before. It’s giving me Sexxxy Pink Disney Drum Majorette Realness.

I loved Kyle’s point re: that you may mention something about a friend to other friends and discuss it a bit, but you don’t then turn around and say “GUESS WHAT THEY WERE SAYING ABOUT YOU LAST NIGHT!” Because no matter who said what, Dorit had no need to go repeat it to Erika (and I agree, I’d be tempted to leave and sleep elsewhere if I were sick/not feeling well, too). And then that mess at the NYC dinner. She’s so uncomfortable to watch.

Regarding your friends as kings and queens is a noble sentiment. But is it really warranted when said friends are Lala, Scheana (both of whom seem to think of undies and furs as royal wear), and James?

It’s too bad Jax was such a douche to LVP last episode. Because I’d say World Dog Day is the *ideal* place for him to make an appearance. In other news: I used to think Sandoval was odd looking, but darn it if he doesn’t look super cute to me now. I wouldn’t DATE him (or anything else), but he’s cute. Even in a tuxedo shirt topped with a drapey sweater and adorned with a bow tie. And he’s funny. (Jax is going to miss out on “a lotta hot bitches” at the dog event. Hee.) Lisa looked 100% unimpressed. I loved the wide-eyed look of disbelief she shot towards Katie after Kevin Lee gave Katie the (probably leftover) flowers and “okay? Sorreeeeee?”

Judge you? I’m jealous! What I wouldn’t give to never have endured “Fly” in heavy rotation...

There’s a joke in here about faking enthusiasm for Ariana, but I’m too tired to come up with it...

The only Greyhounds she likes are the ones with four legs, not four wheels that run over her. ;) Dorit is shaping up to be a real peach, ain’t she? Last season I shrugged my shoulders at her; this season I cringe whenever she’s on screen. The only other HW I’ve switched opinions on so quickly was Peggy on RHOC. In the preview: Erika asks Dorit of all people to quote what Kyle “actually said”? Because Dorit has been a reliable witness since when?

Speaking of Big Brother... Google knows more about you than you’d ever feel comfortable with, and is more than happy to advertise to you based on that knowledge. I wish I were joking :p Anyway, I like to have BBAD on as white noise before bed. If it’s All Marissa, All the Time, then I’m not going to do that this time around...

Haha. Ad for coconut oil is showing at the top of the page. I’ve been watching for maybe 20 minutes, and about 19 of that has been Marissa talking. Ok, that’s an exaggeration, but it feels true. I wish they would show something else (other than the Ross/Brandi/Marissa conversation), at least for a while. The commercials are starting to feel like a relief rather than an intrusion.

I 100% co-sign Peggy’s angle as well. Skin care as woman’s ritual is spot on; and cold cream is not about putting something on for men to see (in fact, wasn’t the old joke that it freaked men out and was a turn off?), it’s about removing the residue of the day and transitioning to a period of relaxing and inhabiting your personal and private space once again. And your connection to the modern obsession with 10-step beauty rituals and such is a good one. No one knows that your face mask smells like watermelon or your moisturizer has a fun jelly feel or your cleanser has a cooling effect or that your makeup remover takes off makeup in one swipe or that you used 10 luxury products to take care of your skin... except you. It’s all part of the user’s enjoyment. You’re taking care of yourself, not putting something on to enhance your beauty or cover something up. Zit cream? Yeah, sell that by manipulating teenagers’ anxiety about their peers’ opinions ;) Anti-aging products, same deal. But Ponds (and the modern equivalent)—yeah, I see the “ritual” angle playing well. (And yes, Megan’s line about her mother only using water is 99.9% implausible. After seeing this episode for the first time, I googled to see if removing makeup with only water was possible—it is, sort of, but only if you use a special cloth... or if you’re willing to leave residue behind.) Also, back then I think young women were more likely to look to their mothers for beauty advice. (Even in my teenage years in the 80s and 90s, many ads for skin care products still talked about things like using the stuff your mother trusted.) Now it’s more about being on trend.

Never mind

It’s entirely possible that I’m seeing more than what’s there—I certainly just thought of the scene as evidence of Pare’s mediocrity the first several times I saw this episode—but I guess it was the juxtaposition of Betty being “improper” (drinking the raw milk straight out of the bucket) and vulnerable (wondering to Henry if her kids really loved her) against Megan, deteriorating as an actress out in LA, probably wondering if *Don* really loved her... that speech seemed like something she’d mentally rehearsed and was just waiting to say at the first hint of criticism or other negative comments/behavior from Don directed at her. Again, I’m no fan of the Megan character or of Pare in the role... just saw something differently, and it struck me as interesting.

Caught the last third of “Field Trip” today on Audience. While I generally love the episode, I did happen to catch Megan’s “This is how it ends!” speech and it had all the emotional resonance of her soap opera acting. Was that purposeful? To show us that Megan really did lack real emotional range and that’s why she kept failing at getting parts? Especially compare to Betty’s strong reaction to Bobby and the sandwich—her feelings seep through the screen. Really? More real feelings over a sandwich (of course deeper than the sandwich) than the end of a marriage? It’s funny; I don’t care for Megan in general, and I don’t think Jessica Pare is a wonderful actress, but for some reason I kind of wondered if we were supposed to see something rehearsed and inauthentic in her at that moment. I dunno. Maybe I drank the Weiner Kool-Aid. (Wait. Ew.)

So says Lydia. And I mean, she’s right. She brought a lot of negativity to the season. Hers towards Shannon. Not to mention, many viewers’ negativity towards her. ;)

Seriously. The cashier who accidentally gave me a print receipt rather than an emailed one was more apologetic last night than was PK.

Geez. LVP, Dorit, and Kyle were all different shades of ridiculous at that dinner. Dorit, the most: Late; playing LVP and Kyle off each other; her ridiculous co-signing of Kyle’s “jelly” moment; and, well, that wig. Kyle, for doing the “jelly” thing, and overreacting. And being late. LVP for just stomping off. And all of them for continuing that stupid argument from PK’s boatday. I guess if I were to side with anyone, it would be LVP, because Dorit and Kyle are feeding off one another, and Dorit LOOOOOOVVVVVVVEEED being Kyle’s twu bestie. And LOL “LVP is unloved by her parents and that’s why she needs all that attention.” As if Dorit is some shy violet who hides in a corner and drives a green Camry instead of a Rose-gold Bentley or whatnot.

You’re welcome. And if you ever need to laugh until you can’t breathe, check out the Gallery of Regrettable Food. Plenty of weird American recipes ;)

Hey, one of my dad’s favorite stories of growing up was about someone who served jello salad with... whole cloves of garlic. He was so excited (he loved jello salad), and that quickly turned to disgust because: garlic in jello salad. He choked it down to be polite, and then the lady said “Oh! Here’s some more, since you loved it so much!”

Right. Even if it is just to say “See? SHE recognizes my pain and doesn’t blame me!”

Aww, poor Jax Jason. I think this is his biggest acting role yet. And it’s a shame that the Reiki person is falling for it.

Oh no. Jax apparently has the same kind of watch that Dorit owns.

“If you wanna bring your DJ gear, your wiki-wiki, your boyfriend...” Slick and shady, Stass. I do question the wisdom of LVP for putting Stassi and James in charge of... anything that her reputation hangs on. ETA: Grumpy Cat Ariana’s attitude was just stank. Things fall apart? You suck it up and deal. Even if it sucks. Stassi shouldn’t have left Jax in charge of something so important, but at the same time: JAX was the flake. You’re so worried? Being a backup of anything you think you’ll need. I’ve had to make do so many times that I have very little sympathy for Ariana and her janky disrespect. Even if it is directed at Stassi. I guess there’s a new coven in town.

That attitude seriously puts me off, and it kept me from liking Kyle for several seasons. The sing-songy “jelly” stuff is immature and not a good look for someone who’s nearing 50.