Sir RaiderDuck OMS

Assuming she's from Eugene like Brandan is, it wouldn't be crack. It would be either methamphetamine, cocaine or heroin. And her teeth look real, so it likely wouldn't be meth (which notoriously destroys your teeth). There was also a TON of pot in Eugene even before legalization, but that wouldn't cause the addiction issues Brandan's mom had. (Disclaimer: I mostly lived in the Eugene/Springfield area from the time I was a toddler into my mid-30s. To the best of my knowledge, I never met Brandan or any of his family.) Her total bitchiness about Mary's family's house was beyond rude, though. Not every place is like America. She needs to chill the fuck out and actually Google a foreign land before she goes there. She was a shit mom whose son is a basket case, and therefore has ZERO right to criticize the way anyone else lives. Meanwhile, Holly looks more strung out than ever. Whatever she's taking is doing a number on her lymphatic system. Notice how swollen her neck was? And you're in your 40s. Quit with the daily Zoom chats with Mommy. Everyone in the TJ/Kimberly storyline continues to be awful except Kimberly's very nice parents. TJ has done a nice job gaslighting Kimberly about what her duties will be, and the fact that getting up at 5:30AM will soon be considered "sleeping in" for her. We'll all have fun watching when this blows up in his face. Danielle and Yohan are both terrible people. She's a manipulative liar and he's a gaslighting thief.

Anyone else find it obnoxious how people (such as, oh I don't know, CIRIE AND FELICIA) spend all season stabbing everyone in the back when it suits them, then whine about the "snakes and vipers" surrounding them and how they can't trust anyone? Pot, meet Kettle. I'm not sure, but I think that backlot street they were on for the comp is part of the Paramount Studios tour. Barring a major surprise in the next week and 1/2 (such as Bowie Jane winning the Final Three comp), we're looking at a Matt/Jag final two. As much as I loathed the thought of Cirie cackling her way to a victory with Jared and Izzy as her caporegimes, this is even more boring.

I figured out who Manuel reminds me of: A really bad impression of the wrestler Razor Ramon (aka Scott Hall). I showed my wife a Razor Ramon vignette on YouTube right after the ep and she agreed with the similarity. The difference, of course, is that Ramon was deliberately written to be arrogant and obnoxious. Manuel's just acting that way naturally. Does Devin seem a little...slow to anyone? Or maybe she's just really shy and self-conscious? Nikki's mind must be blown. In America, guys literally pay $500 an hour to have sex with her, but her boyfriend can't even pretend to be interested. Rob's sister was right: the child conversation should have been had a long time ago. So did Gino give Jasmine $4K or $10K for the wedding dress? They've said two different amounts.

I'm pretty sure GR has the chefs baste the cooking steaks with butter in a hot pan lifted off the heat for a minute or two (probably so the butter doesn't burn). His problem was Jason smearing cold butter on almost-cooked steaks. That may be the way Jason likes to do it, but it's not his restaurant. It's Gordon Ramsay's restaurant, and if you want to work as a chef in GR's restaurant, you're damn well going to cook steaks the way he wants. Methinks this is building up to a big throwdown where Jason tells Ramsay "I know better than you" to his face. I wouldn't be surprised to see him fired mid-service at some point (possibly with a Humiliation Walk through the dining room and out the front door, which GR has done before when he was especially furious with someone). Meanwhile, I would have saved the Punishment Pass for either Garbage Day, or the day when they have to lug boxes full of raw meat through the dining room and into the kitchen. And that Hotel Milo they visited should have been named Hotel Meh.

The eagle-eyed Mrs. RaiderDuck noticed that the "shampoo" was labeled "Palmolive."

I looked up the dish in Wikipedia using the Turkish name Sarper gave (which I have now forgotten) and it literally means "Raw Meatball." It's basically prepared the way Sarper was preparing it. There's also a vegetarian variety with scrambled eggs and a vegan option. But it's all mashed together and served raw. No thank you.

He's in love with the idea of marrying an American. Has he told her yet exactly what will be required of her (i.e. getting up before dawn to brew everyone's Chai, cooking all the meals, doing everyone's laundry, etc)? If she's this unpleasant now, wait until the other shoe drops. Shekinah's sister was awful, but that meal looked disgusting. Raw meat and grains mixed with someone's ungloved hand? Yecccch. Having said that, it obviously was deeply personal to Sarper and you see his growing frustration with the way he was being cross-examined. I'd be willing to bet Shekinah or her sister wouldn't want him dancing through their DMs (unless they'd already scrubbed theirs beforehand).

Gotta disagree here. My wife works in B2B commission sales and spends a lot of time (i.e. over half the year and sometimes as many as 38 weeks out of 52) on the road. She LOVES that life, and when she's off and home, she doesn't have to worry about any work obligations. She's told me more than once that she'd hate having to go into the office every single weekday. Jovi may be be the same way. (Disclosure: We were together for years before we were married, and were friends before we began dating. She's had this career and this life the whole time, was very upfront that she's not going to change to a 9-5 career, and I would never ask her to do so. The fact that we're both only children and very independent people may have something do with the way we make it work.) Asuelu's no prize, but it is SERIOUSLY messed up for Kalani to skip out on Couples Therapy to have a one-night stand with her new boyfriend. She's treating both men dishonestly right now. Also: If someone cheats WITH you, there's a very good chance they'll cheat ON you. Dallas isn't in this because he cares about Kalani, but rather to say he banged her. All three are horrible people. Michael was in a no-win situation. If he tells Angela about being called from the strip club, she'll go ballistic. If he doesn't tell her, she'll go ballistic when she finds out from Ed or whoever. Yara is way better-looking than any of the strip club skanks we saw on this ep. What the F is Jovi's problem? Does he not understand how far out of his league he scored?

Why doesn't Jasmine simply train her dog to not go on people's carpets? Or, even better, just not have a dog in the first place?

Ramsay always talks up the "celebrities" who appear on HK. I've been a football fan for most of my life and while the name "Victor Cruz" was familiar, I'd forgotten what position he played until I looked it up. Mattias was a total screwup but he's at least taking everything seriously. Claudia appeared to be treating this as a lark, which is a guaranteed way to get on Ramsay's bad side. Raneisha was trying to play the Scolding Mom character, but a little bit of that goes a long way when you're dealing with twentysomethings who aren't related to you. As for the blue steaks, it's simple: YOUR GRILL TEMP IS TOO DAMN HIGH. After you've seared the outside, you need to turn the heat down. Continued cooking at high temps will give you what we saw: an outside that's well-done (or even slightly burned) with a near-cold interior. To get a more even heat distribution, you turn down the heat and cook it longer. That's why a lot of chefs will sear the steaks on the grill and finish them in the oven. It takes a little longer, but you get a great steak that way. Taking shortcuts when cooking thick steaks just doesn't work. On a slightly unrelated note: My wife and I recently bought some of the Hexclad pans they use on the show and GR relentlessly touts on social media. They're really, REALLY good pans, by far the best we've ever owned. They heat super-evenly, have a non-stick finish you can scrub if necessary without ruining it (the instructions say you can clean them with everything up to and including Comet and steel wool without ruining the finish), and they're dishwasher-safe and induction-compatible. Seriously: They're the bomb. (And no, I'm not getting any $$$ for posting this, but if the Hexclad people want to send us a free pan to expand our collection, we wouldn't turn it down.)

He probably does a lot of swimming and running for his exercise. Can't really do either in the house. I know the house has some exercise equipment, but using an exercise bike or running on a treadmill can be really boring, especially when you don't have a TV or something to take your mind off it. There's not much to do in the house except talk and eat. The stupid multiverse "twists" this season have all been lame and insulted our intelligence.

Maybe her stylist was cosplaying as Helen Keller again? It seems to happen once a month or so. At this point, I assume America is telling him what to wear. She personally finds it attractive, and Cory (who's smart enough to know how far out of his league she is) wants to please her. He doesn't give a damn what anyone else thinks. FWIW, I seem to remember Larry Dallas of Three's Company wearing a blue denim version of that same jumpsuit decades ago.

Zingbot/OTEV was as aggressively annoying as always. Cameron's not nearly as smart or popular as he thinks he is. Loved the DR quick cuts to everyone else agreeing with Zingbot's assessment of him as a "tool." Good on Felicia for getting out of a horrid DV situation by choosing to serve her country. And Cirie continues to be indignant that her master plan blew up in her face before she could claim the $750K she assumed was rightfully hers (and/or Jared's). Whatevs.

I don't pretend to know anything about Panamanian custodial law, but wouldn't the children's father have some say in this, especially if he and Jasmine have some kind of Joint Custody arrangement? Meanwhile, the problem with Nikki is not that she's trans. The problem is that she's taken the Darcey/Stacey route of surgically altering her face until she barely looks human. The pictures of her from 15 years ago show a normal-looking woman. Now? Not so much. Sophie's mom likes to say "Rob the Knob." I was totally waiting for her to call him a "wanker." I can't even deal with Witch Lady. I have a friend into this Tarot garbage too, and she will literally post stuff on Facebook like "What does it mean if one of my Tarot cards falls out of the deck while I'm shuffling it?" and her nuttier friends will respond with some hidden meaning the universe is trying to convey. No, it just means you're a sloppy shuffler. Not everything has deep significance. /rant

So many owners are obviously in this for a publicity boost and don't actually want to change anything. IIRC, Ramsay's stated reason for ending the original Kitchen Nightmares was his frustration at putting in the time and effort to turn things around, only for the idiot owners to ignore everything he said, revert all his menu changes, go out of business, then blame him. And I would have laughed in Chef Bobby's face the minute he came at me with his faux Tony Soprano shtick. The people who make a big deal out of being "tough guys" never are.

Methinks Ramsay was more than a little annoyed at Tad describing himself as "A professional Quidditch player." (Chef, please. Nobody's paying you to hop around with a broom clenched between your legs, pretending you're soaring around Hogwarts. And if nobody's paying you, you're not a professional. You just have an eccentric hobby.) Notice how when Tad waited a beat after elimination, GR sarcastically asked if he was waiting for a broom, then slammed Quidditch in his closing remarks. Jason is a byproduct of our litigious culture. Many employers are afraid of being sued for Defamation if they give a bad reference, so few even give references anymore (they'll give your starting and ending dates, but that's it). Without anyone saying "This dude's a total screwup who can't even poach goddamn lobster meat", his resume looks impressive, so he keeps getting hired until people figure out he's hopeless and can him. Rinse and repeat.

My daughter (born in the mid-1990s) was diagnosed with Amblyopia when she was a toddler. Amblyopia is NOT caused by weak eye muscles, although the crossed eyes (Strabismus) may be. Amblyopia is what happens when your brain starts ignoring the crossed eye altogether. If it goes on too long, your brain will eventually forget how to use that eye and you'll be more or less blind in one eye permanently. When my daughter was diagnosed at four years old, she couldn't even read the top letter (the huge "E") on the eye chart with her bad eye. Fortunately, patching and glasses worked wonders for her, and her vision with glasses is fine today. Remember that a lot of these entrepreneurs come onto the show both to find a shark to partner with, AND for the free 10-minute prime-time advertisement for their product. They win either way as long as the Sharks like the product. It sounds like Candace may be developing some kind of Lush competitor (i.e. high-end, all-natural body products). If so, this soap would fit in perfectly. As someone who's suffered from intermittent eczema for most of his life, I was interested in her story, but I don't use bar soaps. I agree with the other posters that Dr. Bronner's soaps are awesome.

In the early part of the season, we're being asked to keep track of a lot of people we've never heard of before. Men in Blue vs Women in Red is an easy-to-remember dynamic that doesn't require any additional mental effort from the viewers.

We could not believe how terrible Tara Reid looked. It seems much the same as last season, right down to the Staff having zero patience for anyone flaunting their egos. Methinks Brian Austin Green, Blak Chyna (sp?) and Reid will be the first to go: the first two for their attitudes and Reid because she's such a hot mess who gives up on everything before even trying.

IIRC, that's not what she said. She said Kelly never bought her a card or flowers, and made a snarky comment at some point during her convalescence. Several years ago, my wife was diagnosed with kidney cancer and had to have a kidney removed (which completely rid her body of the cancer, as it was still encapsulated in the kidney but would not have remained encapsulated much longer -- thank you, Mayo Clinic!). I absolutely helped her out in her recovery, but never once thought about buying her a card or flowers (for one thing, she doesn't even like flowers). Watching the latest ep, she was appalled at the idea that Molly would demand either from the man she was living with. And Kelly's alleged snarky comment to her could have been nothing more than irritation at Molly demanding Kelly do everything for her after what was likely an elective procedure. The first few days after a major surgery are stressful on both parties, and things are said that aren't necessarily meant in the moment. Molly should be bringing this up to Kelly himself, not whining about it to a bunch of near-strangers. This past-life regression stuff continues to bug. NONE OF THIS IS REAL! And none of it can be used to explain whatever personality defects you have here and now.

This may have been the most boring cliffhanger in years. Remember that this isn't the Return comp itself, but rather a pre-comp to determine which houseguest runs the (presumably timed) Return comp himself. Jared will want to do it himself if he has the chance, and Cameron, depending on what the comp is, may also opt to let Jared try it and hope he fails*. So this pre-comp may be totally meaningless. Gamewise, Cameron is handling things much better than Jared. Both were voted out unanimously or near-unanimously. Cameron (obviously the smarter of the two) understands he has to try to mend fences, while Jared is just stewing about how he was done dirty and generally being unpleasant. Even if Jared wins, Cirie's running interference for him may not be enough to keep him around. *I would assume the pre-comp winner will be shown the actual Return comp itself and told what the time limit is. Otherwise, their "choice" would be completely meaningless, as they would have no way of knowing which decision would be more advantageous.

Random observations: *Nicola's going to find it hard holding down a job in America with his "Being gay is a sin against God" BS. He might get a talking-to by HR once, but he'll be fired the second time he says it out loud. *Stapler's friend held her mouth exactly like Butt-head does, and was really nasty and judgy towards Dempsey. *After a point, it doesn't matter whether Violet is telling the truth, or there really is a baby, or the baby is Riley's. (For the record, my answers would be No, Maybe, No.) With this level of distrust on both sides, it's better if Riley and Violet cut the cord and never see each other again. *Amanda continues to falsely believe she's better than everyone else. *Not sure what value Stapler pinching a loaf outside added to the show.

Cameron's really arrogant and not nearly as smart as he thinks he is. Jared has a lot of the same problems, but Cameron doesn't have his mommy in the house running interference for him like Jared does. Cam's biggest mistake was trusting Jared over Red. He'll be kicking himself for that for a long time. You're not wrong, but whatever Izzy gloats about from her Loserville apartment does not concern me. She and Cameron deserve each other.

Oh, I'm sure we'll see Cirie and Jared on an Amazing Race before too long. Cirie's offering to fall on her sword to save Jared was genuine but pointless. Jared barely knows how to go to the bathroom without Cirie telling him. Whatever alliance she still has would disintegrate thirty seconds after she walked out the door. Speaking of Jared: I haven't been a Blue fan this season, but his treatment of her was just awful. Meanwhile, I loved the cutting between America and Cory's DR segments where they each hope the other one is left on the block next to Cameron. They DO make a cute couple and have a legit shot to continue on the outside, but business is business and they both want the $$$. Cameron continues to be an annoying know-it-all when he should be making alliances and acting at least a little humble. I'll be shocked if the vote tonight is not unanimous, and I'd love to see his reaction when he watches this season and realizes his supposed Ride or Die (post-Red) Jared was laughing at him to his face.

And this is partly why Shekinah, by her own admission, has a string of failed relationships: she's a shrill, demanding harpy who believes that if she personally doesn't enjoy an activity, nobody should do it. I'm a happily married man whose wife has no problem with me video gaming as a way to relax and blow off stress. Even if I were single, if I invited a woman back to my apartment and she started freaking out about my Xbox, I'd probably ask her to leave immediately. I have no interest in a relationship with someone who's going to judge how I spend MY own leisure time. I hope Brandan's OK with marrying Mary, because that's the only solution to the pregnancy her family is going to accept. Kim chews out TJ in front of her parents (which I'm sure he found humiliating), bullies him into a 2AM text argument even after he tries de-escalating the situation, then wonders why he finally decides he's had enough and breaks it off with her. Except for her parents, everyone in this storyline is awful. What is it with people who bring their dogs everywhere? (Note that I'm not talking about legitimate service animals, which Danielle's dog obviously wasn't.) Any adult who can't bear the thought of spending an hour or two separated from their precious little Fluffy should see a psychiatrist. You could tell the immigration lawyer was horrified by both the dog's presence and its relieving itself on Danielle, but didn't want to say anything.