S07.E20: Unconditional Love

[kicksave]

On 10/14/2018 at 8:39 AM, Caracoa1 said:

Cate is so codependent on Tyler... it's so pathetic....and sad.  I think her PTSD comes from choosing a relationship with Tyler over keeping Carly.  He pressured her to give Carly up so they could have a future together...so she did...now that relationship is falling apart before our eyes on national television. She can't admit to herself that you gave away Carly to keep Tyler... She chose a man over her own flesh and blood.  I believe choosing adoption for Carly was the best thing those two ever did...but the havoc it's creating in Cate's mind is destroying her.  

I disagree...respectively. First off, she doesn't have PTSD. She has been diagnosed previously with bipolar disorder. She has depression, perhaps clinical depression and suffered from post partum depression. Tyler didn't talk her into giving up Carly...as I remember, they discussed it at great length and hashed it over with their adoption counselor for months. They made a mutual decision based on the volatile and dysfunctional home life Cate was in and the Tyler's drug addicted father. They BOTH agreed that bringing home a baby at their age at the time would be bad for the baby and  that they should give her a better life. I don't recall Tyler bullying at her at all. 

Their relationship started in middle school...they clung to each other as teens because they had similar issues going on at home. Now they're adults...their lives have changed, they've changed. Catelynn is very manipulative and guilts Tyler into staying with her...they need couples counseling on top of individual counseling. But instead, they are having another child. More post partum depression, more responsibility for Tyler if Catelynn doesn't step up and help him and co parent. There is so much wrong here with these two and especially Catelynn it's hard to watch sometimes. But blaming Tyler for her supposed PTSD is just not fair. He has stepped up to the plate time and time again and goes to great lengths to be a supportive spouse...she doesn't. 

[heatherchandler]

On 10/11/2018 at 9:21 AM, IDreamofJoaquin said:

@Pepper Mostly you are probably right.  If NuMatt wasn't there to drive her, she wouldn't be able to go anywhere.  It's def Blue Apron. 

No way is it Blue Apron - I use that and it is actual work!  I don't see her chopping, mixing or anything.  It has to be from Costco, and Andrew no doubt picked it up.  Or Kousin Krystal.

[IvySpice]

Smug hypocrite Bristol has been earning my contempt for ten years now. Dakota had to put in some real effort to make me like him even less than Bristol.

Dakota is a grown ass man. People with mental illness are still responsible for their choices. If you are too sick to function as a father and husband, then don't knock up your girlfriend and don't get married. It's not your wife's job to heal your incurable illness. It's your wife's job to be your wife, and none of her alleged wrongdoings sounded to me like her not being a wife. He kept saying she didn't "support" him. What does that mean? When he was yelling at her in the car in front of the children, nothing she said was going to make his anxiety go away, but he was going to blame her regardless. He has unrealistic expectations about how much better he'd feel if his wife would just take his abuse with a smile. And yes, it's cowardly to blame her for his suffering when she didn't put him in the Marines (that was him) or send him off to war (that was W) or shoot his buddies (that was the Taliban). If you're such a man of honor, own your mistakes when you have wrongly directed your rage at your wife.

"I wouldn't call you a bitch if you didn't drive me to do it" is classic abuser BS whether it comes from a MOH recipient or a garden-variety asshole.

Table for one re Catelynn and Dakota: Level of severity of PTSD symptoms doesn't have much to do with the objective degree of trauma. It has to do with the patient's underlying vulnerability and the quality and effectiveness of later treatment.  People can suffer from crippling, life-threatening anxiety disorders when they didn't experience trauma at all. We do not know that Dakota is in greater agony from his current psychiatric symptoms than Catelynn is from hers.

[MyPeopleAreNordic]

On 10/14/2018 at 7:39 AM, Caracoa1 said:

Cate is so codependent on Tyler... it's so pathetic....and sad.  I think her PTSD comes from choosing a relationship with Tyler over keeping Carly.  He pressured her to give Carly up so they could have a future together...so she did...now that relationship is falling apart before our eyes on national television. She can't admit to herself that you gave away Carly to keep Tyler... She chose a man over her own flesh and blood.  I believe choosing adoption for Carly was the best thing those two ever did...but the havoc it's creating in Cate's mind is destroying her.  

I 100% agree. 

I also think that the majority of Cate's childhood "trauma" isn't so much caused by her upbringing with addict April (& Butch).  The real "trauma" was giving up Carly to keep Tyler.

I also think a  good deal of Cate's "depression," being a miserable log who drags Tyler down, leaving Tyler to care for Nova alone, and going off to treatment is (subconsciously) a way to punish Tyler perpetually for how he pressured her to place Carly for adoption in order for them to stay together.  Well, she placed Carly and they are indeed still together...but Cate's gonna make sure he's just as miserable as she is for the rest of their relationship to punish him.  They both resent each other so much but neither will say it (and they're having another baby). Ugh. 

Edited October 16, 2018 by MyPeopleAreNordic

[ava111]

On 10/11/2018 at 9:44 AM, Pepper Mostly said:

I'm telling ya, Blue Apron or one of those kits that they deliver to your house. You think Amber went to Costco? She'd have to go outside! (only half kidding here).

Actually Costco now delivers pretty much all food items and some basic household items like detergents and paper towels. I can get it within hour. 

[Birdee]

On 10/11/2018 at 12:31 PM, MyPeopleAreNordic said:

My husband & I refer to our son as "Bear" (it's his nickname) occasionally when talking to each other or to him & our daughter as "Birdie." 

Excellent choice in nickname. 

And wow, this show is really in the crapper. It aired two days ago and we're only on page 3. As much as I roll my eyes at most of the situations these girls find themselves in, Bristol's marriage implosion is just making me uncomfortable. I dated a Marine with PTSD in college. It wasn't pretty and fortunately for us, I figured out we weren't good for eachother and left. There's definitely some stigma attached to leaving a hero though, and I feel for Bristol there. 

This really isn't good TV, MTV. 

[druzy]

5 hours ago, Birdee said:

Excellent choice in nickname. 

And wow, this show is really in the crapper. It aired two days ago and we're only on page 3. As much as I roll my eyes at most of the situations these girls find themselves in, Bristol's marriage implosion is just making me uncomfortable. I dated a Marine with PTSD in college. It wasn't pretty and fortunately for us, I figured out we weren't good for eachother and left. There's definitely some stigma attached to leaving a hero though, and I feel for Bristol there. 

This really isn't good TV, MTV. 

@Birdee I hate to break it to you but this aired eleven days ago and we're only on page 3.

[Birdee]

Damn it, we're way worse off than I thought!

[kira28]

This is boring. Maci, Cate and even amber with a new baby are boring and stuck in the same place they have been for the last few years. I have no interest. I love Gary and Leah and little Emilie and Kristina and would watch a show just aboit them. Cheyenne is very pretty and the drama isn't bad and Corey is easy on the eyes. Bristol is evil. I can't Stand her. Not saying she should have to endure verbal abuse from Her husband but that poor guy is crying out for help. She can at least attempt to be compassionate and support him. She's so cold!! I think Zach is just a stand in to make Corey jealous. 

Cate makes me angry. She's such a worthless piece of trash. She makes me feel sorry for Tyler! He not so secretly hates her. I'm glad he finally admitted he's repulsed by her slug like behavior. I'm tired of these stupid doctors slapping a diagnosis on her just for forking over thousands of dollars. Tyler has to pick up the pieces that everyone in his life leave behind. They leave him to clean up the mess. Cate has No business bringing another child into her life that she will neglect. Tyler actually attempts to create structure for nova and big fat cate swoops in and out of novas life and when she's around she ignores Tyler's rules and routines for nova probably making it even harder on him and nova when she decides to pack up and leave for "therapy". Last episode when Tyler was venting about cate wants a pig she gets one, she wants a horse she gets one Tyler has no say but in sure when she's away Tyler has to take care of that horse that he never wanted. Heck I don't think he wants another kid. Cate doesn't have to be responsible for any if the choices she makes. She dumps all the repsonsibility on everyone else. While she slips her therapy to watch movies and eat all day. 

Amber is also a selfish pig. Leah does not want to come over because she knows she will be coerced into feeding and Changing baby james while amber sleeps and wants no part of that! That little girl has Amber's number. 

 

Edited to add i don't believe catelyn suffers from ptsd, just possibly depression and definitely laziness. Her issues only conveniently affect her when she doesn't want to do something (like parent her child, be an equal partner, take a shower or clean her house). She has no problem leaving rehab to go to red carpet events or getting out of bed for things she actually wants to do (that never involve Nova) If you have mental health issues they don't take a day off so you can fly halfway across the country to appear on a talk show. If it weren't for Tyler nova would be feral. 

Edited October 19, 2018 by kira28

[kira28]

Did anyone else think it was odd that Andrew left amber and his practically newborn son home alone and just took off to attend a friend's wedding? Wouldn't u take ur girlfriend and new baby with u? Or just not go because I'm sure a close friend would understand u just had a baby and can't take off on a whim to fly across country. Kind of cold to leave Amber alone with James when she couldn't even get out of bed to puke when pregnant