S09.E19: Side Dishes Side Pieces

[RHJunkie]

51 minutes ago, WireWrap said:

It doesn't matter about the paperwork or her attorneys, she lied about filing and she lied that the divorce was done/finalized........she lied. If they were only separated, then say that and I have no doubt that Cynthia knows the difference between being separated, legally filing for divorce and the divorce being finalized.

Cynthia's lie was "televised" as well, the only difference is that Phaedra got caught lying on camera and Cynthia didn't. Just because Cynthia wasn't caught in that lie doesn't make her any less of a liar, Phaedra at least filed and the divorce was only stopped because Apollo stopped it. LOL

ETA, Phaedra's bad behavior should be called out but that doesn't negate Cynthia's deliberate lies. One doesn't cancel out the other.

That's what I meant, Cynthia's lie wasn't outed as a lie on TV.

And exactly - so there's no reason to bring up Cynthia's lie when people call out Phaedra's lie. People aren't obligated to give equal time to discussing each woman's lie and if people are willing to give Cynthia the benefit of the doubt and rationalize her divorce proclamation, they aren't obligated to give Phaedra the same benefit of the doubt when she's been on record of having lied or evaded truths many times. They aren't conversations that have to be discussed simultaneously - they are separate issues with separate circumstances involving different people with different personalities and histories. One lie doesn't cancel out another, but to that same effect, only discussing one lie doesn't mean that someone is refusing to acknowledge that the other lied to some degree as well. If the matter was between Phaedra and Cynthia, it would only be fair to discuss both their dishonesties but that isn't the case and people don't need to be reminded about Cynthia's lie each time they choose to discuss yet another lie that has been told by Phaedra and/or Apollo. It's a far more compelling discussion because it's so much more messy than Cynthia and Peter.

The only thing that should be fairly acknowledged in the discussion of Phaedra and her marriage/divorce/lies is to acknowledge that Apollo is not some innocent victim in all of this and is guilty of all the things he accuses Phaedra of. Cynthia has nothing to do with this and lends nothing to the conversation when talking about Phaedra lying. 

[WireWrap]

1 hour ago, RHJunkie said:

That's what I meant, Cynthia's lie wasn't outed as a lie on TV.

And exactly - so there's no reason to bring up Cynthia's lie when people call out Phaedra's lie. People aren't obligated to give equal time to discussing each woman's lie and if people are willing to give Cynthia the benefit of the doubt and rationalize her divorce proclamation, they aren't obligated to give Phaedra the same benefit of the doubt when she's been on record of having lied or evaded truths many times. They aren't conversations that have to be discussed simultaneously - they are separate issues with separate circumstances involving different people with different personalities and histories. One lie doesn't cancel out another, but to that same effect, only discussing one lie doesn't mean that someone is refusing to acknowledge that the other lied to some degree as well. If the matter was between Phaedra and Cynthia, it would only be fair to discuss both their dishonesties but that isn't the case and people don't need to be reminded about Cynthia's lie each time they choose to discuss yet another lie that has been told by Phaedra and/or Apollo. It's a far more compelling discussion because it's so much more messy than Cynthia and Peter.

The only thing that should be fairly acknowledged in the discussion of Phaedra and her marriage/divorce/lies is to acknowledge that Apollo is not some innocent victim in all of this and is guilty of all the things he accuses Phaedra of. Cynthia has nothing to do with this and lends nothing to the conversation when talking about Phaedra lying. 

I get what you are saying and why but to me the simple fact is that Phaedra didn't initially lie about this. She did file and it was almost granted/finalized when Apollo stopped it. I can see her Lawyer calling her telling her that it was approved and they were awaiting the Judges signature (or whatever they need from the courts at the end) when Apollo stopped it, which may have taken a day or 2 for Phaedra to find out about. I do think she found out he stopped it when they were in Hawaii and that is why she was so mad and left Kenya's party despite what she said about Kenya. That was nothing more than a very ugly deflection tactic so that she didn't have to admit the truth. The weird thing is, that I really believe that had she told them the truth, that Apollo stopped it at the very last minute, they would have supported her and she would have gotten the sympathy support from all of them, Kenya and Kandi included. It was stupid of her to lie and cover up the truth. I will also add that I think Apollo knew about the divorce long before he claimed he found out but waited to stop it as payback/punishment to Phaedra. That man hates her, really, really hates her and enjoys putting the screws to her.

IMO, Cynthia didn't lie "to some degree", she flat out lied about all of it when she didn't need to. And, my initial post was more about Cynthia's lie, pointing out that Phaedra wasn't the only one to lie about her divorce, because Cynthia's lie was/is more shocking, at least to me.

[RealReality]

I haven't known Cynthia to be a liar on the show, so I'd be interested to hear her defense/take on the situation.

[zoeysmom]

49 minutes ago, WireWrap said:

I get what you are saying and why but to me the simple fact is that Phaedra didn't initially lie about this. She did file and it was almost granted/finalized when Apollo stopped it. I can see her Lawyer calling her telling her that it was approved and they were awaiting the Judges signature (or whatever they need from the courts at the end) when Apollo stopped it, which may have taken a day or 2 for Phaedra to find out about. I do think she found out he stopped it when they were in Hawaii and that is why she was so mad and left Kenya's party despite what she said about Kenya. That was nothing more than a very ugly deflection tactic so that she didn't have to admit the truth. The weird thing is, that I really believe that had she told them the truth, that Apollo stopped it at the very last minute, they would have supported her and she would have gotten the sympathy support from all of them, Kenya and Kandi included. It was stupid of her to lie and cover up the truth. I will also add that I think Apollo knew about the divorce long before he claimed he found out but waited to stop it as payback/punishment to Phaedra. That man hates her, really, really hates her and enjoys putting the screws to her.

IMO, Cynthia didn't lie "to some degree", she flat out lied about all of it when she didn't need to. And, my initial post was more about Cynthia's lie, pointing out that Phaedra wasn't the only one to lie about her divorce, because Cynthia's lie was/is more shocking, at least to me.

There are time limits to appeal or object to a judgment.  For the most part it is 30 days.  So claiming Apollo somehow extended the misery to punish Phaedra is just not valid.  I don't know why anyone would care whether or not Phaedra was divorced.  She certainly took her time filing it and of all people she had the best reason to divorce him.  To me it was all the crap with the shame and involving the church and wanting to have some sort of ceremony at the church to save everyone's souls.  She is just too much.  The Court doesn't just throw out a judgment because one party really hates the other.

We have no idea why Cynthia LIED.  My guess is no one really gives a rip.  Unless Peter objects and has it set aside.  It will be interesting to see if it even warrants a mention at the Reunion.  Over the past however many years Cynthia has been on the show her lack of honesty has never been an issue.  Compare her reputation to Phaedra who has been in the hot seat more than a few times for patently misrepresenting the truth.

I don't who gave Kenya the great idea that both parties were divorced.  Seemed a little callous with Peter being on the vacation.

[WireWrap]

2 minutes ago, RealReality said:

I haven't known Cynthia to be a liar on the show, so I'd be interested to hear her defense/take on the situation.

I would also love to hear why she lied, it just doesn't make sense to me.

[MsDiva2007]

Why these women think its their business if Phaedra is divorced or not? I mean goodness knows they all have enough business to mind of their own. Kandi certainly likes to keep Porscha's name on her tongue hmmm. Mean while Porscha gives Zero F's about Kandi and toddler and clan! This Apollo side chick looks a little on the slow side and bragging about being a side chick to a felon? 

[WireWrap]

3 minutes ago, zoeysmom said:

There are time limits to appeal or object to a judgment.  For the most part it is 30 days.  So claiming Apollo somehow extended the misery to punish Phaedra is just not valid.  I don't know why anyone would care whether or not Phaedra was divorced.  She certainly took her time filing it and of all people she had the best reason to divorce him.  To me it was all the crap with the shame and involving the church and wanting to have some sort of ceremony at the church to save everyone's souls.  She is just too much.  The Court doesn't just throw out a judgment because one party really hates the other.

We have no idea why Cynthia LIED.  My guess is no one really gives a rip.  Unless Peter objects and has it set aside.  It will be interesting to see if it even warrants a mention at the Reunion.  Over the past however many years Cynthia has been on the show her lack of honesty has never been an issue.  Compare her reputation to Phaedra who has been in the hot seat more than a few times for patently misrepresenting the truth.

I don't who gave Kenya the great idea that both parties were divorced.  Seemed a little callous with Peter being on the vacation.

Which is why I find this more interesting, shocking and puzzling than Phaedra once again spinning her lies in with some truth. LOL

And, I seriously doubt that anyone calls her out on the lie and if they did, I'm don't think it would make it past editing because Andy didn't challenge her on WWHL.

Edited April 4, 2017 by WireWrap

[zoeysmom]

1 minute ago, WireWrap said:

I would also love to hear why she lied, it just doesn't make sense to me.

It goes back to what her attorney represented to her and what she and Peter had agreed to.  In Hawaii they weren't divorced so something happened to make her believe or feel comfortable stating the divorce was final.  These were two people talking about getting divorced. 

[AndySmith]

Quote

Mean while Porscha gives Zero F's about Kandi

That is definitely not true.

[zoeysmom]

1 minute ago, MsDiva2007 said:

Why these women think its their business if Phaedra is divorced or not? I mean goodness knows they all have enough business to mind of their own. Kandi certainly likes to keep Porscha's name on her tongue hmmm. Mean while Porscha gives Zero F's about Kandi and toddler and clan! This Apollo side chick looks a little on the slow side and bragging about being a side chick to a felon? 

I think when Phaedra claims she is divorced and then does the big sob story about getting a divorce and blames others for the demise of her marriage it is kind of their business. 

I don't know what is worse being a side chick to a felon or marrying a felon and having children with them?  Tastes vary.

[WireWrap]

1 minute ago, zoeysmom said:

It goes back to what her attorney represented to her and what she and Peter had agreed to.  In Hawaii they weren't divorced so something happened to make her believe or feel comfortable stating the divorce was final.  These were two people talking about getting divorced. 

She/they hadn't even filed for divorce until after the season was over for several months! Cynthia isn't that dumb to not know the divorce application/papers have to filed in the courts before you can be granted the divorce! Talking about getting a divorce is not the same as filing for it or being granted a divorce. LOL 

1 minute ago, zoeysmom said:

I think when Phaedra claims she is divorced and then does the big sob story about getting a divorce and blames others for the demise of her marriage it is kind of their business. 

I don't know what is worse being a side chick to a felon or marrying a felon and having children with them?  Tastes vary.

Phaedra was out of line saying that, it was stupid/mean/untrue and IMO, she did it because she found out that Apollo blocked the divorce when she was in Hawaii and was embarrassed to tell anyone.

As for which is worse, IMO, it is getting with a married 2 time felon on his way to federal prison for 8 years! LOL

[zoeysmom]

52 minutes ago, WireWrap said:

She/they hadn't even filed for divorce until after the season was over for several months! Cynthia isn't that dumb to not know the divorce application/papers have to filed in the courts before you can be granted the divorce! Talking about getting a divorce is not the same as filing for it or being granted a divorce. LOL 

Phaedra was out of line saying that, it was stupid/mean/untrue and IMO, she did it because she found out that Apollo blocked the divorce when she was in Hawaii and was embarrassed to tell anyone.

As for which is worse, IMO, it is getting with a married 2 time felon on his way to federal prison for 8 years! LOL

If you read the disciplinary reports on attorneys you would be amazed at the number of attorneys who represent to clients they have filed or served papers on their clients' behalf and have not.

If Cynthia had spent the time working out a settlement agreement, which means she would have done the work regarding listing assets and liabilities is a far cry from just talking about a divorce.  There may be extenuating circumstances surrounding Cynthia and Peter's divorce and it may be as simple as Cynthia not wanting to talk about it under the advice of counsel. I could have sworn we saw Cynthia with her attorney earlier this season.

I can't imagine anyone wanting to marry Apollo and if I had a daughter who had count them FIVE college degrees I would be terribly disappointed she settled for a felon and felon who turned around and committed more crimes.  Neither woman is getting mush of a prize.  I just don't understand why Phaedra would care.

[RealReality]

1 hour ago, MsDiva2007 said:

Mean while Porscha gives Zero F's about Kandi 

 

1 hour ago, AndySmith said:

That is definitely not true.

Well, Porsha tried to give a fuck, but was denied.

[AndySmith]

Rimshot, please.

[RealReality]

6 minutes ago, zoeysmom said:

If you read the disciplinary reports on attorneys you would be amazed at the number of attorneys who represent to clients they have filed or served papers on their clients' behalf and have not.

If Cynthia had spent the time working out a settlement agreement, which means she would have done the work regarding listing assets and liabilities is a far cry from just talking about a divorce.  There may be extenuating circumstances surrounding Cynthia and Peter's divorce and it may be as simple as Cynthia not wanting to talk about it under the advice of counsel. I could have sworn we saw Cynthia with her attorney earlier this season.

I can't imagine anyone wanting to marry Apollo and if I had a daughter who had count them FIVE college degrees I would be terribly disappointed she settled for a felon and felon who turned around and committed more crimes.  Neither woman is getting mush of a prize.  I just don't understand why Phaedra would care.

Bolded is truth.  Not only that, I think if the process seems too hard to explain, an attorney might "simplify" it in a way that would involve them calling the divorce final.

Like I said, I don't know....but I'd be interested to hear her explanation before branding her a liar.  If only because dishonesty doesn't seem to be an issue with her.

[RealReality]

1 hour ago, WireWrap said:

As for which is worse, IMO, it is getting with a married 2 time felon on his way to federal prison for 8 years! LOL

LOL, its a real race to the bottom.

[Ubiquitous]

15 hours ago, Aging Goth said:

It didn’t quite work out that way as he didn’t really thing she would actually file for divorce.  Yes there may have been misspellings of his name on the papers but that was not on Phaedra as she was not the one who would draw up the papers, it would be her lawyer. 

I am not familiar with law, but wouldn't Pharisee Phaedra have to review those papers before signing off on them?
 

[Missmissie173]

22 hours ago, Ubiquitous said:

It's a lonnnng story I so I forgot all the details, but Sheree started construction on her own. Yeah, she's been pouring everything she makes into it, but she was dropped from the show b/c that was her only storyline and she's only been back for a season or two. At some point she appeared on a candid reality show with a "life coach" and she said she was trying to get more money from Bob (that she wasted on other projects) to fund the house instead of for her kids, claiming she was building it for them and not herself. The host called her out on that crap, ha ha.

Thanks so much.  These women get their lives in such pickles!

[ridethemaverick]

9 hours ago, Adeejay said:

But you have to understand, Cynthia isn't Public Enemy Number One, Phaedra is. 

Given all the venom being directed at her, apparently, I missed the scenes where she committed murder; swindled some elderly folks out of their home, social security and pension; burned down an orphanage; kicked some puppies and spat on a homeless person. 

She was "mean" to Kenya. 

[Yours Truly]

16 hours ago, RHJunkie said:

So is the more appropriate time to share a disagreeing opinion is when someone is absolutely sure of their decision? If someone is unsure, then I think a good friend would provide other perspectives to consider. I can't recall if Phaedra was unsure or if she had made up her mind at the time. If Phaedra had made up her mind, then I can see why Phaedra would feel upset and uncomfortable with Kandi's decision to bring her cousin around to meet her but if the friendship was as real and valued as they both said, how would you not know how to navigate the situation to put an end to Kandi inserting her opinion? I don't think for a second that Kandi was coming from a malicious place or trying to shame Phaedra for her decision. I think Kandi felt an emotional tie to the situation being someone who was raised without a father, someone who is raising a child without the father present and someone who has family members who were in the same situation as Aiden and Dylan. The reason why I defend Kandi here is not because I don't see anything wrong with how she managed the topic with Phaedra and not because I don't understand why Phaedra would have been offended or uncomfortable in the moment. I defend Kandi because I do think she had good intentions and for someone to whine as much as Phaedra about how real their friendship was and how Kandi basically ruined it, if that was the breaking point, that doesn't seem like something a true friendship couldn't overcome. If it were malicious, this would be an entirely different conversation and I would support Phaedra ending their friendship. 

Exactly! Bottom line for me. Every hiccup between Kandi and Phaedra was exploited by Phaedra in order to get sympathy, bring drama for the show and to get back at Kandi for not being a "Yesman" kinda friend. The different situations and missteps by Kandi were worth mentioning and/or addressing but Phaedra ran with that shit and assigned a ridiculous amount of malice and underhandedness to Kandi's sentiments and as time went on the slights became more and more "pearl clutching" in nature. 

Phaedra's the one that broke that friendship apart and while I think Kandi did their friendship no favors by being so damn lethargic about her role as a friend I truly believe that Kandi was blindsided with how voraciously Phaedra was to undermine their friendship to others and how quick she was to throw their friendship as a whole under the bus without too much hesitation.  I also don't think it was Phaedra's intention to completely kill the relationship but once she realized that Kandi wasn't going to play along she shifted gears and got even shadier towards Kandi. I saw it as her not wasting the opportunity. Friendship is dying might as well have this tension feed and apply to her storyline.

Edited April 4, 2017 by Yours Truly

[Yours Truly]

11 hours ago, RHJunkie said:

That's what I meant, Cynthia's lie wasn't outed as a lie on TV.

And exactly - so there's no reason to bring up Cynthia's lie when people call out Phaedra's lie. People aren't obligated to give equal time to discussing each woman's lie and if people are willing to give Cynthia the benefit of the doubt and rationalize her divorce proclamation, they aren't obligated to give Phaedra the same benefit of the doubt when she's been on record of having lied or evaded truths many times. They aren't conversations that have to be discussed simultaneously - they are separate issues with separate circumstances involving different people with different personalities and histories. One lie doesn't cancel out another, but to that same effect, only discussing one lie doesn't mean that someone is refusing to acknowledge that the other lied to some degree as well. If the matter was between Phaedra and Cynthia, it would only be fair to discuss both their dishonesties but that isn't the case and people don't need to be reminded about Cynthia's lie each time they choose to discuss yet another lie that has been told by Phaedra and/or Apollo. It's a far more compelling discussion because it's so much more messy than Cynthia and Peter.

The only thing that should be fairly acknowledged in the discussion of Phaedra and her marriage/divorce/lies is to acknowledge that Apollo is not some innocent victim in all of this and is guilty of all the things he accuses Phaedra of. Cynthia has nothing to do with this and lends nothing to the conversation when talking about Phaedra lying. 

WELL SAID!!!!!

[RHJunkie]

9 hours ago, WireWrap said:

I get what you are saying and why but to me the simple fact is that Phaedra didn't initially lie about this. She did file and it was almost granted/finalized when Apollo stopped it. I can see her Lawyer calling her telling her that it was approved and they were awaiting the Judges signature (or whatever they need from the courts at the end) when Apollo stopped it, which may have taken a day or 2 for Phaedra to find out about. I do think she found out he stopped it when they were in Hawaii and that is why she was so mad and left Kenya's party despite what she said about Kenya. That was nothing more than a very ugly deflection tactic so that she didn't have to admit the truth. The weird thing is, that I really believe that had she told them the truth, that Apollo stopped it at the very last minute, they would have supported her and she would have gotten the sympathy support from all of them, Kenya and Kandi included. It was stupid of her to lie and cover up the truth. I will also add that I think Apollo knew about the divorce long before he claimed he found out but waited to stop it as payback/punishment to Phaedra. That man hates her, really, really hates her and enjoys putting the screws to her.

IMO, Cynthia didn't lie "to some degree", she flat out lied about all of it when she didn't need to. And, my initial post was more about Cynthia's lie, pointing out that Phaedra wasn't the only one to lie about her divorce, because Cynthia's lie was/is more shocking, at least to me.

Truthfully, whether Phaedra lied about being officially divorced or not was just a blip on my radar because it's clear that her intent is divorce and it's going to happen at some point.

I'm not sure you can have it both ways where you want to infer and rationalize Phaedra's circumstances to justify her providing a technically incorrect statement yet argue that Cynthia flat out lied. Phaedra is a lawyer, who should know better than her that no contract or agreement is official until both parties put ink on paper? Who would know better what kind of questions to ask a lawyer about your case than another lawyer? Phaedra is the last person to get a pass on a legal technicality when she's a lawyer and should certainly know the fundamentals to these cases that any non-lawyer citizen would know. Unless Phaedra's lawyer lied to her or she misunderstood her (none of which we've seen evidence of), Phaedra made an incorrect statement but she likely thought that they had finally gotten through to Apollo and he verbally agreed to sign and  that was enough to put her mind at ease and for her to be done with it up until Apollo threw another curve ball her way. At the end of the day, it was still an incorrect statement.

Before the show even aired and it was reported that Cynthia and Peter were getting a divorce, it was reported that both parties are working out a settlement before filing for divorce to avoid a battle in court. When Cynthia claimed to be officially divorced, she could have meant that her and Peter agreed on a settlement and the expectation was that it would be smooth sailing once they could do that so the moment she filed for divorce she considered it official even though technically it wasn't.

There are circumstances that can rationally explain both women's view on their divorce status and you can't really rationalize why one person lied more than the other. You can care that one woman lied more than the other, but I don't think it's a fair argument to suggest that one is more guilty of lying than the other. They both made incorrect statements and that's all there is to it.

[Yours Truly]

8 hours ago, zoeysmom said:

I think when Phaedra claims she is divorced and then does the big sob story about getting a divorce and blames others for the demise of her marriage it is kind of their business. 

I don't know what is worse being a side chick to a felon or marrying a felon and having children with them?  Tastes vary.

Phaedra likes to try to shame others to take the attention away of her shady and grimey behaviors. All of a sudden Kandi was this vicious, heartless friend who denied her a shoulder a kleenex a pity party, meanwhile Phaedra got time for sexual chocolate... Girl Bye!

Pheadra exacerbates things for that smoke and mirror effect. Heightens bullshit so that her "little" indiscretions pales in comparison to Kandi's lesbian encounters, Kenya Moore Whore, Todd rudely diving into Phaedra's couch for pennies, even the befriending of dumb Frick. Everything is so extra with her so that she can keep doing her underhanded dirt while everyone is distracted with circus of petty she brings to town.

Edited April 4, 2017 by Yours Truly

[Aging Goth]

7 hours ago, Ubiquitous said:

I am not familiar with law, but wouldn't Pharisee Phaedra have to review those papers before signing off on them?
 

Not necessarily as some just listen to what their lawyer says and just sign.  Most people just do not proofread legal documents as they believe their lawyers know what their doing.

[balisticnikki]

16 hours ago, WireWrap said:

So why do you think Cynthia lied about filing for divorce, that it was finalized and she was/is a single woman when none of that was true? Most here have no problem calling out Phaedra for her lie that her divorce was finalized but few are calling out for Cynthia lying about all of it.

 

I wasn't talking about Cynthia. Both Cynthia and Phaedra appear to be lying. But that was not what my comment was about. My comment was only a response to what Aging Goth wrote, offering reasons why Phaedra was not actually lying. And none of it made sense to me; Phaedra was lying. (Or maybe I am missing the point of what Aging Goth was saying?)

[balisticnikki]

9 hours ago, RealReality said:

Bolded is truth.  Not only that, I think if the process seems too hard to explain, an attorney might "simplify" it in a way that would involve them calling the divorce final.

 

No attorney is going to tell a client, "you're divorced" when the divorce has not been finalized. LOL Then you'll have ppl running off and getting remarried, etc.

When you get divorced, a copy of your stamped divorce decree is immediately filed with the courts as a public record. Anyone can check it, as early as the day after the divorce is finalized.

There is no gray area with a divorce. You either are or you aren't. No one is going to be mistaken about that and no attorney is going to lie to their client about it. It's not that hard to explain; "sorry, it's not final yet...no, he hasn't signed...we're still waiting on the judge...there has been a delay...he requested a continuance...the judge is requesting another document..."

[Yasmine]

My opinion on this episode after just watching it is the same as it always is.

I like all the women, Porsha & Phaedra are both liars but they are hilarious. I don't believe they will be friends for long.

I like Kandi, she is one of my favorite housewives of all time. I'm really glad her and Phaedra aren't friends anymore. & I like the industrial feel of the restaurant actually.

Cynthia has never been a liar so I'm really interested to find out why she lied especially to Noelle. I like Cynthia a lot. 

Kenya goes in and out of love and hate with me.

I love Sheree also but she is trying to fake the funk .... there was nothing wrong with that damn condo & she does not need a house that big.

I actually don't mind the guys (well Peter & Todd) I think they just genuinely don't like Phaedra so any way to get to her they take. 

Apollo's fiancé is a bird. & I'm glad all the girls shaded her. I understand Kandi not wanting to be involved with this bullshit that Apollo is bringing. 

Edited April 4, 2017 by Yasmine

[zoeysmom]

51 minutes ago, balisticnikki said:

No attorney is going to tell a client, "you're divorced" when the divorce has not been finalized. LOL Then you'll have ppl running off and getting remarried, etc.

When you get divorced, a copy of your stamped divorce decree is immediately filed with the courts as a public record. Anyone can check it, as early as the day after the divorce is finalized.

There is no gray area with a divorce. You either are or you aren't. No one is going to be mistaken about that and no attorney is going to lie to their client about it. It's not that hard to explain; "sorry, it's not final yet...no, he hasn't signed...we're still waiting on the judge...there has been a delay...he requested a continuance...the judge is requesting another document..."

Attorneys do say things like, "it is all done," meaning there is nothing further for the client to do.  I agree it would be awful if a client relied on a representation by their attorney they were done and they ran out and got married.  Hopefully, Cynthia before remarrying would get another pre-nup.   

In my jurisdiction it is common they actually have a form for a Nunc Pro Tunc dissolution.  So it is not all that rare that there are mistakes and unintentional misrepresentations.  http://www.nolo.com/dictionary/nunc-pro-tunc-term.html 

[RealReality]

1 hour ago, balisticnikki said:

No attorney is going to tell a client, "you're divorced" when the divorce has not been finalized. LOL Then you'll have ppl running off and getting remarried, etc.

When you get divorced, a copy of your stamped divorce decree is immediately filed with the courts as a public record. Anyone can check it, as early as the day after the divorce is finalized.

There is no gray area with a divorce. You either are or you aren't. No one is going to be mistaken about that and no attorney is going to lie to their client about it. It's not that hard to explain; "sorry, it's not final yet...no, he hasn't signed...we're still waiting on the judge...there has been a delay...he requested a continuance...the judge is requesting another document..."

Like I said, I'll wait to hear Cynthia explanation before branding her a liar.  If there is anything I've learned studying law, it's that its rarely as black and white as the layperson thinks.

Maybe Cynthia lies, maybe someone lied to her, or maybe there is a much more nuanced explanation.  

1 hour ago, Aging Goth said:

Not necessarily as some just listen to what their lawyer says and just sign.  Most people just do not proofread legal documents as they believe their lawyers know what their doing.

As an attorney Phaedra would know better.  I can extend Cynthia some benefit of the doubt based on her demonstrated history of lying, and the fact that she is a trained attorney who knows how to research the process and should know to read legal paperwork.

[Petunia13]

1 hour ago, balisticnikki said:

No attorney is going to tell a client, "you're divorced" when the divorce has not been finalized. LOL Then you'll have ppl running off and getting remarried, etc.

When you get divorced, a copy of your stamped divorce decree is immediately filed with the courts as a public record. Anyone can check it, as early as the day after the divorce is finalized.

There is no gray area with a divorce. You either are or you aren't. No one is going to be mistaken about that and no attorney is going to lie to their client about it. It's not that hard to explain; "sorry, it's not final yet...no, he hasn't signed...we're still waiting on the judge...there has been a delay...he requested a continuance...the judge is requesting another document..."

That is interesting you say that. I think in drawn out or messy divorces they must be very specific of the status, for that reason, so bigamy doesn't occur. My mother and father's divorce took 4 yrs and when it was finalized she got married immediately again at a justice of the peace. Had the attorney been vague at all she would have had 2 husbands for years. 

[zoeysmom]

25 minutes ago, RealReality said:

Like I said, I'll wait to hear Cynthia explanation before branding her a liar.  If there is anything I've learned studying law, it's that its rarely as black and white as the layperson thinks.

Maybe Cynthia lies, maybe someone lied to her, or maybe there is a much more nuanced explanation.  

As an attorney Phaedra would know better.  I can extend Cynthia some benefit of the doubt based on her demonstrated history of lying, and the fact that she is a trained attorney who knows how to research the process and should know to read legal paperwork.

I am be wrong about this but I was under the impression Phaedra had already copped to intentionally using an alias to avoid press scrutiny.  How many people file a legal document with not only their first initial and middle name but the responding party's first initial and middle name followed by a misspelled last name?  Phaedra as far as I know goes by Phaedra Parks, not P. Whatever Nita.  Apollo has always pretty much been identified as Apollo Nida not A. Whatchmacallit Nita.   

[BloggerAloud]

Quote

Why these women think its their business if Phaedra is divorced or not? 

If these women ever minded their business about anything, there wouldn't be a show.

[RealReality]

1 hour ago, zoeysmom said:

I am be wrong about this but I was under the impression Phaedra had already copped to intentionally using an alias to avoid press scrutiny.  How many people file a legal document with not only their first initial and middle name but the responding party's first initial and middle name followed by a misspelled last name?  Phaedra as far as I know goes by Phaedra Parks, not P. Whatever Nita.  Apollo has always pretty much been identified as Apollo Nida not A. Whatchmacallit Nita.   

Well that would certainly kill the "well Phaedra didn't even file these documents so she didn't know the name was spelled wrong!" theory.

Although, the fact that she knew, and that it was later called a "material misrepresentation" makes me think that someone is onto her game of trying to avoid having to serve Apollo.

It seems like a very Shady Phaedra move.  Give the attorney the wrong name,, give them the address for the prison and pretend like its Apollos home address and then seek default when he doesn't respond because he never got the papers.  I wonder if she even put the address for the right prison on the paperwork.

[RealReality]

1 hour ago, Petunia13 said:

That is interesting you say that. I think in drawn out or messy divorces they must be very specific of the status, for that reason, so bigamy doesn't occur. My mother and father's divorce took 4 yrs and when it was finalized she got married immediately again at a justice of the peace. Had the attorney been vague at all she would have had 2 husbands for years. 

A friend of mine did her divorce through a paralegal (which I personally feel is the unauthorized practice of law).  Anyways, apparently he messed up the paperwork, but not enough for the clerk to notice.....until she tried to enforce the alimony agreement.  At which point, they realized that she wasn't technically, officially divorced.

She hasn't tried to remarry, nor has her "ex" husband so it hasn't really come up.  But both would tell you honestly tell you they are divorced.  Or they wouldn't consider it a lie.

So, I don't think its always a black and white situation.

[WireWrap]

1 hour ago, zoeysmom said:

I am be wrong about this but I was under the impression Phaedra had already copped to intentionally using an alias to avoid press scrutiny.  How many people file a legal document with not only their first initial and middle name but the responding party's first initial and middle name followed by a misspelled last name?  Phaedra as far as I know goes by Phaedra Parks, not P. Whatever Nita.  Apollo has always pretty much been identified as Apollo Nida not A. Whatchmacallit Nita.   

I haven't read this, I have read where bloggers have speculated that she did something like this but nothing directly from Phaedra herself.

[luckyroll3]

3 hours ago, Yasmine said:

Apollo's fiancé is a bird. & I'm glad all the girls shaded her. I understand Kandi not wanting to be involved with this bullshit that Apollo is bringing. 

I wish one of these ladies was classy enough to toss her pieces of bread.  Kenya might, if she thought she came up with the idea herself.  Maybe there and be a L&HH crossover.....

[RealReality]

5 minutes ago, luckyroll3 said:

I wish one of these ladies was classy enough to toss her pieces of bread.  Kenya might, if she thought she came up with the idea herself.  Maybe there and be a L&HH crossover.....

These women have their titties pushed up so sky high I'm not sure where they would hide the bread.

[AndySmith]

Quote

I wish one of these ladies was classy enough to toss her pieces of bread.

I'm surprised none of them said "Girl, I know you must be thirsty, the bar is over there..."

[Yours Truly]

19 hours ago, RealReality said:

Like I said, I'll wait to hear Cynthia explanation before branding her a liar.  If there is anything I've learned studying law, it's that its rarely as black and white as the layperson thinks.

Maybe Cynthia lies, maybe someone lied to her, or maybe there is a much more nuanced explanation.  

As an attorney Phaedra would know better.  I can extend Cynthia some benefit of the doubt based on her demonstrated history of lying, and the fact that she is a trained attorney who knows how to research the process and should know to read legal paperwork.

Yeah, I'm guessing there's more to it. Either way this is one detail that doesn't have any true negative ramifications to anybody cause I would think the immediate people involved have enough information to make any appropriate decisions with their lives moving forward. 

[Aging Goth]

Interesting news.... Apollo has been cited for criminal fraud while inside the jail!!  He might end up spending even more time in prison for this latest crime.

As for Porsha and Phaedra's friendship, it is still going strong and Phaedra is on line thanking Porsha for have a private party for her and that she did not go to the OLG opening

21 hours ago, balisticnikki said:

No attorney is going to tell a client, "you're divorced" when the divorce has not been finalized. LOL Then you'll have ppl running off and getting remarried, etc.

When you get divorced, a copy of your stamped divorce decree is immediately filed with the courts as a public record. Anyone can check it, as early as the day after the divorce is finalized.

There is no gray area with a divorce. You either are or you aren't. No one is going to be mistaken about that and no attorney is going to lie to their client about it. It's not that hard to explain; "sorry, it's not final yet...no, he hasn't signed...we're still waiting on the judge...there has been a delay...he requested a continuance...the judge is requesting another document..."

Actually that is exactly what I was told and I thought my marriage was done until I found out my husband contested (which I found out he can do up to three months after a divorce is finalized) and we STILL  haven't actually divorced even though this took place in 1981!!!  He has lived with three different women since we separated and was using our "marriage" to avoid marrying them.  Hence why I tend to believe Phaedra.

[Aging Goth]

Quote

As an attorney Phaedra would know better.  I can extend Cynthia some benefit of the doubt based on her demonstrated history of lying, and the fact that she is a trained attorney who knows how to research the process and should know to read legal paperwork

When it is such an emotional situation as a divorce, both are on the same level. Phaedra under any other circumstances may have known better but this was HER going through a divorce and emotions are very raw.  All she may have wanted was to get it over with so whatever the lawyer said, she believed.  Training has nothing to do with the emotional aspect of getting a divorce.  Cynthia, on the other hand, is totally at odds with divorcing Peter and She actually confessed that the whole divorce part of this season was producer driven for a story line. 

[RealReality]

2 hours ago, Aging Goth said:

When it is such an emotional situation as a divorce, both are on the same level. Phaedra under any other circumstances may have known better but this was HER going through a divorce and emotions are very raw.  All she may have wanted was to get it over with so whatever the lawyer said, she believed.  Training has nothing to do with the emotional aspect of getting a divorce.  Cynthia, on the other hand, is totally at odds with divorcing Peter and She actually confessed that the whole divorce part of this season was producer driven for a story line. 

I don't buy that Phaedra was all that emotional over the divorce to begin with.  She has made cold and calculating decisions, that let me know she is not "So emotional" that she didnt read a legal document. 

She gave the wrong name for Apollo and made it sound like he could attend the divorce proceedings which would be the basis of the material misrepresentation in her case.  She obtained the divorce through default because Apollo couldn't reply because he didn't get the paperwork.  Those decisions are cold and calculating.  Phaedra can try to blame some clerical error, but material misrepresentation is more than that.

Oh, and in spite of all this "emotion" that rendered Phaedra powerless to read legal documents in her own divorce she had the ability to counsel Johnnie on the law, deal with the legal ramifications of a client with a grenade who wanted to kill her, and cover her part in the kandi drama.

LOL @ the idea that Phaedra was "So much more emotional" over her divorce than cynthia given that she had been talking to another guy as it was going on.  

Even those who maintain Cynthia lied about the divorce recognize that she has filed.  So whatever "emotion" accompanies a divorce was just as bad for her. 

I already pity Phaedras clients when she is doing her best.  If she was "too emotional" to read documents in her own divorce, her clients, such as they were weren't even getting her at her shitty best.  Sad.

[Jamie Satyr]

5 minutes ago, RealReality said:

I don't buy that Phaedra was all that emotional over the divorce to begin with.  She has made cold and calculating decisions, that let me know she is not "So emotional" that she didnt read a legal document. 

She gave the wrong name for Apollo and made it sound like he could attend the divorce proceedings which would be the basis of the material misrepresentation in her case.  She obtained the divorce through default because Apollo couldn't reply because he didn't get the paperwork.  Those decisions are cold and calculating.  Phaedra can try to blame some clerical error, but material misrepresentation is more than that.

Oh, and in spite of all this "emotion" that rendered Phaedra powerless to read legal documents in her own divorce she had the ability to counsel Johnnie on the law, deal with the legal ramifications of a client with a grenade who wanted to kill her, and cover her part in the kandi drama.

LOL @ the idea that Phaedra was "So much more emotional" over her divorce than cynthia given that she had been talking to another guy as it was going on.  

Even those who maintain Cynthia lied about the divorce recognize that she has filed.  So whatever "emotion" accompanies a divorce was just as bad for her. 

I already pity Phaedras clients when she is doing her best.  If she was "too emotional" to read documents in her own divorce, her clients, such as they were weren't even getting her at her shitty best.  Sad.

Phaedra the "phony!" Who would hire her as a notary for a buck? Not me! ;-(

[balisticnikki]

2 hours ago, Aging Goth said:

Interesting news.... Apollo has been cited for criminal fraud while inside the jail!!  He might end up spending even more time in prison for this latest crime.

As for Porsha and Phaedra's friendship, it is still going strong and Phaedra is on line thanking Porsha for have a private party for her and that she did not go to the OLG opening

Actually that is exactly what I was told and I thought my marriage was done until I found out my husband contested (which I found out he can do up to three months after a divorce is finalized) and we STILL  haven't actually divorced even though this took place in 1981!!!  He has lived with three different women since we separated and was using our "marriage" to avoid marrying them.  Hence why I tend to believe Phaedra.

That is nuts!

My ex-husband and I were always very involved. We always had something to do - appear before the judge, participate in mediation, sign something, submit something, etc. We always knew what was going on and what steps remained...tho he did everything to drag his feet and complicate the process.

A few weeks after my divorce was final, I was looking through the paperwork and found two mistakes. I told my atty and she told me basically, too bad! I wish I would have appealed after the stamp!

But how come you don't finalize it now?! None of my business, sorry. LOL But I would not want to be tied to anyone that long.

I am still very surprised nothing has stuck to Phaedra...and Apollo is getting hit from every direction. How can she be totally blameless in this? That's why I think she is happy to delay the divorce. As long as she acquiesces to some of Apollo's demands, he can't be made to testify against her.

[Aging Goth]

Quote

I am still very surprised nothing has stuck to Phaedra...and Apollo is getting hit from every direction. How can she be totally blameless in this? That's why I think she is happy to delay the divorce. As long as she acquiesces to some of Apollo's demands, he can't be made to testify against her.

It may not have "stuck" because there was nothing to stick.  She might have suspected he was doing something illegal (as she suspected he was cheating) but with no proof there was nothing she could do but keep her and the kid out of it.  However, when the FBI got involved, I'm pretty sure they were thorough in their investigation and if Phaedra was in any way involved she would have gone down with him.  Also with his abject hatred towards her, he would have dragged her down with him to save himself.  After all, he was and is still doing things to either belittle, discredit or hurt her to this day.

As for the divorce, it cannot be so easy to just break from the father of her children but in this case, she had to do it.  Apollo is getting hit because of APOLLO.  He committed the crimes and he is now probably going to be in jail even longer because even in jail he is committing the SAME CRIME!  He just got caught in a fraud scheme he mastermined (using that term loosely) and is up on charges that will more likely extend his forced vacation from freedom

[RealReality]

21 minutes ago, Aging Goth said:

It may not have "stuck" because there was nothing to stick.  She might have suspected he was doing something illegal (as she suspected he was cheating) but with no proof there was nothing she could do but keep her and the kid out of it.  However, when the FBI got involved, I'm pretty sure they were thorough in their investigation and if Phaedra was in any way involved she would have gone down with him.  Also with his abject hatred towards her, he would have dragged her down with him to save himself.  After all, he was and is still doing things to either belittle, discredit or hurt her to this day.

As for the divorce, it cannot be so easy to just break from the father of her children but in this case, she had to do it.  Apollo is getting hit because of APOLLO.  He committed the crimes and he is now probably going to be in jail even longer because even in jail he is committing the SAME CRIME!  He just got caught in a fraud scheme he mastermined (using that term loosely) and is up on charges that will more likely extend his forced vacation from freedom

I dont think that Apollo feelings toward Phaedra would per se make him testify.  I believe that he had no interest in the mother of his children going to jail and leaving them having to stay with relatives.  And with her unable to make money.  Even on her worst day, she makes more money from drug dealers in a parking lot than Apollo could at a legit job.

Phaedra was a board member in Apollo companies, was she unable to read legal paperwork then too?  Or is she just rendered incompetent by divorce.  Or is she just incompetent as a general rule?  Because Apollo nida is no criminal mastermind no matter what juvial time sector he is operating in.  So that he hid his criminal enterprise from his wife, a board member in his company and trained attorney, who knows he is an ex felon seems like a big stretch to me.

Pffft at Phaedra is so emotional.  Again, she has made very calculated decisions to try to slither into a default judgment.  She is cold and calculating enough to make a concerted effort to avoid serving apollo.....enough to the point where the judge calls her moves "material misrepresentations" but she was so emotional about the divorce that she couldn't read a document to make sure it was final?  LOL.

[halkatla]

I like Phaedra, sure she´s got flaws but at this point in time I would love for her to get her own show with her friends.

[balisticnikki]

3 hours ago, Aging Goth said:

It may not have "stuck" because there was nothing to stick.  She might have suspected he was doing something illegal (as she suspected he was cheating) but with no proof there was nothing she could do but keep her and the kid out of it.  However, when the FBI got involved, I'm pretty sure they were thorough in their investigation and if Phaedra was in any way involved she would have gone down with him.  Also with his abject hatred towards her, he would have dragged her down with him to save himself.  After all, he was and is still doing things to either belittle, discredit or hurt her to this day.

As for the divorce, it cannot be so easy to just break from the father of her children but in this case, she had to do it.  Apollo is getting hit because of APOLLO.  He committed the crimes and he is now probably going to be in jail even longer because even in jail he is committing the SAME CRIME!  He just got caught in a fraud scheme he mastermined (using that term loosely) and is up on charges that will more likely extend his forced vacation from freedom

Then I just can't figure out why she got with him. She knew he was racketeer and felon. And I'm sure she suspected he might continue. She is an officer of the court and a "southern belle"; there isn't anyone more poorly suited for her than Apollo! Of all the men she could have gotten pregnant with and married, why him??? If she wasn't trying to get in on his hustle (or even know about it), why was she with him?

Or was it just the ooops pregnancy that made her agree to marriage?

Edited April 5, 2017 by balisticnikki

[balisticnikki]

On ‎4‎/‎4‎/‎2017 at 0:41 PM, Yasmine said:

 

Cynthia has never been a liar so I'm really interested to find out why she lied especially to Noelle. I like Cynthia a lot. 

 

I like Cynthia too. She seems like a good person. So it still strikes me as odd that she hooked up w/ Peter, who has always seemed super shady to me and not especially nice. (Odd pairing to me, like Phaedra and Apollo.)

[Aging Goth]

15 hours ago, balisticnikki said:

Then I just can't figure out why she got with him. She knew he was racketeer and felon. And I'm sure she suspected he might continue. She is an officer of the court and a "southern belle"; there isn't anyone more poorly suited for her than Apollo! Of all the men she could have gotten pregnant with and married, why him??? If she wasn't trying to get in on his hustle (or even know about it), why was she with him?

Or was it just the ooops pregnancy that made her agree to marriage?

The one thing I found out when dealing with the psychology of relationships is that love don't care about what the person does but how one feels. The main victims of fraud are rather intelligent professional women who think with their hearts instead of their brains.  This is classic Phaedra.  I have seen so many "Phaedras" come though our offices, all wondering why they chose the person, even knowing their past.  None ever figure out why or how they were duped or why they chose to stay with an abusive criminal.  It is the "bad boy" syndrome that keeps them with these individuals.  And, yes.  For a Southern Bell type, the pregnancy out of wedlock was an embarrassment and had to be resolved.  The lie about the due date is just a standard in these cases.  Or they use the other lie where they go the country; have the baby; and their mother comes back with their new "sister/brother" that they seem to take a lot of care for.