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S01.E02: Period


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I want to be friends with Sam/Pamela Adlon. The footage of her younger self in the opening credits kills me - I fondly remember her as the kid-sister Pink Lady wannabe in Grease 2 and as Jo's mini-me in one of the Edna's Edibles seasons of The Facts of Life. Is it weird that one of the (many) pleasures of this show for me is that I can pretend it's giving us a view of a grown-up Jo, what her life might be like now? (I mean, especially since Nancy McKeon chose not to do the terrible Facts of Life reunion movie...)

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I really love the opening credits. Its got the same weird kind of sad bittersweet feeling that the Transparent opening credits have. 

I really love everything with Sam, and her going about her life, and I loved the Period rant at the school, but OH MY GOD those two older girls are THE WORST. At least I guess the middle one gave her a hug at the end, even if it was followed with a typical "I hate you mom" crack. I just...is this really what real life Pamela Adlons kids are like? Are they watching this? What do they think about being shown as these teenage amoral monsters without an once of humanity in them? I know its only episode two, but if I am going to commit to this show, I would like to know that two main characters are not going to be pure awful all the time. 

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20 hours ago, tennisgurl said:

I really love the opening credits. Its got the same weird kind of sad bittersweet feeling that the Transparent opening credits have. 

I really love everything with Sam, and her going about her life, and I loved the Period rant at the school, but OH MY GOD those two older girls are THE WORST. At least I guess the middle one gave her a hug at the end, even if it was followed with a typical "I hate you mom" crack. I just...is this really what real life Pamela Adlons kids are like? Are they watching this? What do they think about being shown as these teenage amoral monsters without an once of humanity in them? I know its only episode two, but if I am going to commit to this show, I would like to know that two main characters are not going to be pure awful all the time. 

Her older two daughters are such assholes. My mother would have put me out and changed the locks (AFTER I cleaned every speck of her house until it gleamed) if she had trusted me when she was away, I trashed her house, I gave her ATTITUDE ABOUT IT, told her I couldn't/wouldn't clean it up, and had the nerve on TOP of that to demand that she drive me to soccer practice. And then Sam took the little shit to soccer, cleaned up and didn't make her kids do it? And didn't even punish them? Couldn't be me. 

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Yeah... I feel the same way.  I certainly was raised differently.  This is something that bugs me a LOT about TV teenagers. They can be complete assholes, and the parent(s) just cave.  I reeeeeaaaallllly hate that.

But I love Adlon, and will watch just for her. I can't get into any other comedies on television right now (I'm especially allergic to network sitcoms), so this is it for me, at the moment.

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Lazy writing, to make the kids as little monsters drive the plot, if that is what they're planning to do every episode.

Interesting thing is that she's paying alimony to the fictional ex-husband but she either paid alimony or a big divorce settlement in real life.

If they introduce the ex, is he going to be only painted as a loser asshole who takes her money and badmouths her to the kids?

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I don't think I can watch this show anymore purely because of the kids. Are there actual children that act like this? No, really, does this happen...somewhere...in...the...world? I would not be alive today if I ever once in my life DARED to speak to my mother these kids do. I wasn't even allowed to say I hate inanimate objects much less my own mother!

Beyond their attitudes, I don't think I can take another minute of one of them screaming "MAUHM!" at her. 

I seriously can hardly enjoy the parts I do like because these demon spawn cloud every minute.

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3 hours ago, JessePinkman said:

I don't think I can watch this show anymore purely because of the kids. Are there actual children that act like this? No, really, does this happen...somewhere...in...the...world? I would not be alive today if I ever once in my life DARED to speak to my mother these kids do. I wasn't even allowed to say I hate inanimate objects much less my own mother!

Beyond their attitudes, I don't think I can take another minute of one of them screaming "MAUHM!" at her. 

I seriously can hardly enjoy the parts I do like because these demon spawn cloud every minute.

I was in the bathroom in a train station and I heard a teenage girl screaming and cursing into her phone - she was actually in the hallway outside the bathroom but I could hear her clearly from inside the stall, that's how loud she was. I assumed she was having a fight with her friend; she was saying stuff like "You always fucking do that, GOD," and "You're acting like a total bitch right now." And then (I had left the bathroom by this point and she and I were walking in the same direction, into the main room of the train station) she said "Oh, whatever Mom, I'll do what the fuck I want" and my jaw dropped. Lots of people were around and heard her and their jaws dropped too, and a few of them made eye contact with me and we looked at each other like "HOLY SHIT, this child is a shepherd for the devil." So yeah, there are kids like this, unfortunately. I would never have thought of speaking to my mother that way, but if I had, I may as well have gotten on a train and made a new life somewhere else because I wouldn't be allowed back in her house.

I am very grown. My mother and I have a good relationship and we enjoy each others' company - we spend time together socially doing similar things to what my friends and I do. I STILL don't speak to my mother as though she is a peer, because she isn't. She's never wanted to be related to that way. I know Sam has it hard taking care of three kids, but I think that's all the more reason to be tougher. People do what you let them get away with. Her kids have learned that they can wreck the house their mother works hard to pay for and they still get to go to soccer practice and not get grounded - why wouldn't they do it again the next time she goes out of town?

Also, she was putting her sixteen-year-old's laundry away? Do kids not have chores? My mother has done my laundry for me exactly one time since I was ten, and that was when I was recovering from surgery.

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Ugh, I know! I completely agree.  Why do TV writers create teenagers (and their accommodating/enabling parents) this way? Is that the norm, these days?  This is giving me bad "Dana Brody" flashbacks. <shiver>  First episode, Dana Brody berates her mother for "fucking Mike." Woah...  I get the willies from Paige on The Americans, too.  Is it that hard to make teenagers realistic, respectful and likeable anymore?

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On 9/19/2016 at 2:52 PM, JessePinkman said:

I don't think I can watch this show anymore purely because of the kids. Are there actual children that act like this? No, really, does this happen...somewhere...in...the...world? I would not be alive today if I ever once in my life DARED to speak to my mother these kids do. I wasn't even allowed to say I hate inanimate objects much less my own mother!

There are. Right here in the US. I see them at the grocery store, Starbucks, the mall, etc. And I never ever see the parents snatching them as they should, pluck the phone from their hands and lean in and tell them exactly where they heck they can take their stank attitudes and deplorable behavior, that they pay for their damn lives, and show some freakin respect. Instead, I see parents letting it happen and I've seen multiple times when teenagers storm off after saying something foul or disrespectful to their parents, only to have the parent start running after the kid to apologize. I especially knew something was majorly wrong when I started noticing this in public about 10 years ago. The worst was when I was at the grocery store (middle to upper class established suburb just outside of Philly) and I swear to you, this mom was talking to her about 15 year old daughter, who was uninterested and rolling her eyes and acting petulant, and was telling her something and the teenager yelled loudly "Bitch you get on my nerves!" and stormed out of the aisle and into the next. Her mother went scampering off after her saying "Sorry, I'm so sorry." WTF?!?! Me and this other woman nearby starred at each other with our mouths open, shocked that the entire exchange had occurred. I'd have been kissing pavement before my next breath was drawn and my shit would have been on the curb if I attempted to enter what would surely be my former home at that point. And that's exactly what I would have deserved had I spoken to my mother in that manner ever in life.

I don't get it, I'm endlessly shocked by what I see parents allowing their kids to get away with, and needless to say, I want to like Better Things because I've literally loved Pamela since her Facts of Life days, but I can't because of the motherhood angle. Just her cleaning up the trashed house alone was enough to tell me this would be my last episode. Why you cleaning the house, not grounding the girls, and not taking their phones to help drive home the point of how not okay this was and expecting better behavior in the future is a mystery that I won't be solving. If this was a show following the career of a middle age actress and the challenges that come with that, I'd be in 100% as I've liked just about every other scene on here except the ones with her kids and I think that would be a very interesting show. But because of her kids, especially the two older ones, I'm out.

Edited by JasmineFlower
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And her kids (well, the older two - the younger one seems OK. I laughed when Sam asked who hadn't gotten her period yet and the youngest daughter cheerfully shot her hand in the air) being assholes doesn't add to the story, even. What's the point? If it's supposed to be funny, it's not. If it's supposed to move the plot, it's lazy. If the point is to show that it's hard to be a single mother of three - and of course it is, I'm not saying it's not - they could do that without having the kids be horrible. If they're going to have the kids be horrible, at least make that a part of the story. Her mother lives across the street. Why not ground the kids and ask the mother to stay with them while she works? That's what that phone call to her mother could have been - "Mom, the kids are grounded, can you come stay with them? I have an audition. Make sure they clean the house, but don't YOU clean the house, and [middle child] is not going to soccer practice. She'll tell you I said it was OK; it's not."

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The middle daughter is obnoxious in the typical teenage girl eye-rolly "Moooooooom!" type way, but at least she appears to care about school and has interests like going to soccer practice. The oldest daughter just seems like a delinquent. She smokes pot, hangs out with a bunch of deadbeats without her mom's permission, and trashes their house throwing a party when her mom leaves town.  It's going to be really hard for them to ever make her a likeable character in my eyes. 

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On 9/16/2016 at 3:37 PM, tennisgurl said:

I really love the opening credits. Its got the same weird kind of sad bittersweet feeling that the Transparent opening credits have. 

I really love everything with Sam, and her going about her life, and I loved the Period rant at the school, but OH MY GOD those two older girls are THE WORST. At least I guess the middle one gave her a hug at the end, even if it was followed with a typical "I hate you mom" crack. I just...is this really what real life Pamela Adlons kids are like? Are they watching this? What do they think about being shown as these teenage amoral monsters without an once of humanity in them? I know its only episode two, but if I am going to commit to this show, I would like to know that two main characters are not going to be pure awful all the time. 

Most kids act like that. Now multiply it by 30 and add a dozen parents who insist it didn't happen and you have a typical teacher's day. I think Sam needs to wake up--her kids aren't just rude and disrespectful to her, she's unleashing these little beasts on teachers, babysitters, etc...and rolling her eyes when they complain because...why? She knows they are like this, but she never believes a caregiver who complains or appeals to her for help.

On 9/20/2016 at 7:10 PM, Empress1 said:

If they're going to have the kids be horrible, at least make that a part of the story. Her mother lives across the street. Why not ground the kids and ask the mother to stay with them while she works? That's what that phone call to her mother could have been - "Mom, the kids are grounded, can you come stay with them? I have an audition. Make sure they clean the house, but don't YOU clean the house, and [middle child] is not going to soccer practice. She'll tell you I said it was OK; it's not."

It's just how kids generally are.

I get why she didn't call her Mom. Her Mom is an absolute narcissist, which is why she waited til she had a very long time and needed to clean, to talk to her Mom. She got the entire house cleaned while her Mom talked about herself. The whole time.

Edited by Hecate7
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I get that teenagers throwing parties while their parents are out of town is a real thing. But to have no consequences?

In the first episode, I felt for Sam because she seemed exhausted from doing everything it takes to raise three kids on her own. But she lost a lot of my sympathy in this episode because she is not raising her kids to be responsible. The basic rule in life that people need to learn is that they are responsible for themselves (their words, their actions). If you make a mess, you clean it up. You don't leave it for someone else to clean up. If you have a party, not only do you clean up the ridiculous mess your friends made, but if you get caught, you get in trouble.

And then I just shook my head at Sam putting away all the clean folded laundry into her daughter's bureau. When I was ten, my mom said, "If you want clean clothes, the washing machine is over there. If you want unwrinkled clothes, the iron is over there." I was allowed to ask questions or ask for help (like the first time I tried to iron a shirt with buttons and a collar), but I was told that MY clothes were MY responsibility (as were the sheets on my bed and the towels in my bathroom). I was also given chores (washing the dishes, vacuuming, cleaning the bathroom, etc). When I got in trouble, I was grounded. Sam's daughters seem to do absolutely nothing to help out around the house and there seem to be no consequences when they royally fuck up and that is all on Sam.

On 9/17/2016 at 10:49 AM, Empress1 said:

Her older two daughters are such assholes. My mother would have put me out and changed the locks (AFTER I cleaned every speck of her house until it gleamed) if she had trusted me when she was away, I trashed her house, I gave her ATTITUDE ABOUT IT, told her I couldn't/wouldn't clean it up, and had the nerve on TOP of that to demand that she drive me to soccer practice. And then Sam took the little shit to soccer, cleaned up and didn't make her kids do it? And didn't even punish them? Couldn't be me. 

I KNOW! My parents would have told me that I wasn't goiong to soccer practice or ANYWHERE until the entire house was back to its original pre-party condition. Then they would have grounded me for at least a month.

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