S01.E03: High School Is Wild Fire

[radishcake]

Jazz learns how hard high school will be for her when she attends a soccer conditioning clinic; Jazz sits down with her therapist to help deal with stress.

[AnnieGirl]

Damn, I thought this generation was more kind and accepting. Soccer girl scared me and I'm 30 years outta high school.

[calliope1975]

Man, this took me right back to my own adolescence, but Jazz has an extra layer to deal with on top of the typical insecurities at that age. I'm glad the high schooler didn't mince words, but I hope/think that Jazz has a good support system in her family and friends to deal with the pitfalls of high school. 

[VioletNevermind]

I'm so conflicted about this show.  First, Jazz is absolutely delightful.  She seems like a loving, caring, funny young lady with as much maturity as can be expected from a 14-year-old.  I was impressed with her poise when she began appearing in interviews several years ago and I remain impressed with her as a teenager.  My daughter is also 14 and I would be happy for her to have Jazz as a friend.  All of that being said, I have to admit that I'm unsure about whether or not this show will ultimately be a good thing for Jazz.  As a card-carrying lifetime member of the Duggar Hater Fan Club, I don't trust TLC at all.  There is no way in this world I would allow my family (particularly not my vulnerable teenage daughter, transgender or not) to be portrayed on TLC.  I also have some reservations about Jazz's mom, as some of you have mentioned.  There's something about her that seems to enjoy the fact that she's on TV a little bit too much.  Dad seems solid and the twins are adorable.  Grandma and Grandpa have some learning to do, but at their age, I tend to give them a pass.  At least they're trying.  Clearly (and luckily), Jazz has all of the family support she needs.

 

High school and growing up in general are mortifying enough at times without issues as sensitive as these being broadcast for the world to see.  The fact that the boys at Jazz's school who treat her badly are seeing this show makes me very uncomfortable.  When the girl at the soccer clinic said that "high school is wild fire," all I could do was shake my head.  That describes my high school days perfectly.  Some schools are absolutely ruthless and I went to one just like that.  If you were different in any way, you either kept your mouth shut and your head down or you got your ass kicked (and hoped that's all that happened).  All I can do is hope that Jazz's family/school support system are all over any issues that might arise at school.  We've certainly come a long way with acceptance of LGBT issues and transgender people, but there's a long way to go. 

 

I wish Jazz luck and a very happy life.  My heart goes out to her.

Edited July 23, 2015 by SuzyLee

[TomGirl]

Very well said, Suzy. I love Jazz and applaud her for taking this risk, but I agree that the show really puts her out there at a very vulnerable juncture in her life. I remember age 14, crying my eyes out in bed at night because a certain boy wasn't interested in me or liked another girl instead. And I had all my girl body parts.

[ItsHelloPattiagain]

The soccer girl is correct - High School IS wildfire - for all kids, even those without challenges. Particularly in the area where Jazz and her friends live - where girls routinely get boob jobs for their Sweet 16 presents (or the runner up, a nose job) 

[Human]

I'm also quite conflicted about this show.  I agree that TLC has a horrible track record.  I also don't think children should be portrayed on reality tv.  I have a strong desire for transgender people to become visible, to share their stories and there's always someone who needs to do it first.  It's just so hard when it's children because reality tv places a significant amount of additional stressors on them.  And of course, seeing Jazz having to traverse high school and adolescence, it's like we all know it's going to be sucky no matter what so adding on being transgender is just...I'm cringing from all my own memories lol.  

[jacksgirl]

Long time teacher here and even though I teach elementary, many of our friends are teachers/coaches/administrators. Yes, high school can be horrible for many. I did enjoy soccer girl saying that the soccer players stick together and will defend one of their own. For me, it seems like High school is still the place where you need to find your group. We have the band kids, the smart kids, the jocks, the preps, the goths, the stoners, etc. I realize this is such a stereotype, but there is truth to it, at least where I live. When kids gets to college or jobs, it seems like they have a lot more self confidence and can break free, but at 15, 16, 17, most kids want to just fit in. I hope Jazz continues to play soccer. Soccer girl will defend her with her great braid.

[Honey]

Love the show.  There was one thing I didn't like about this episode.  The family was sitting around talking about the boys moving back in to the same room together, when their sister comes home.  They were discussing redoing the boys room, and maybe getting some new furniture. 

 

That all ended when Jazz said that she wanted her room done.  She said they had promised for her birthday some time ago, and never did it.  So Jazz gets her room painted and redecorated, and the boys got nothing.

 

I wonder if this is a pattern in the family.  I did notice the boys didn't argue about it.  Maybe it's just something they're used to.

[Human]

I didn't get any sense that the boys got nothing.  Rather, I figured that there was either no filming of redoing the boys room or that it was cut in editing because it wasn't relevant to telling the story.  

[VioletNevermind]

I didn't get any sense that the boys got nothing.  Rather, I figured that there was either no filming of redoing the boys room or that it was cut in editing because it wasn't relevant to telling the story.  

 

That was my takeaway, too.  TLC is well-known for their creative editing (that's putting it politely). 

[Honey]

I didn't get any sense that the boys got nothing.  Rather, I figured that there was either no filming of redoing the boys room or that it was cut in editing because it wasn't relevant to telling the story.  

I guess I was just more interested in seeing what the boys would do to their room.  Those boys are so cute and they seem like good kids.

[ItsHelloPattiagain]

 

The soccer girl is correct - High School IS wildfire

I was at the doctor's yesterday and read a story about a girl in the same area where Jazz lives who was an honor student and soccer player - a girl who had everything going for her - great family, etc - who hung herself in her closet - the parents found her and she had written "I'm Sorry" all over her legs with marker.  

[radishcake]

I was at the doctor's yesterday and read a story about a girl in the same area where Jazz lives who was an honor student and soccer player - a girl who had everything going for her - great family, etc - who hung herself in her closet - the parents found her and she had written "I'm Sorry" all over her legs with marker.  

God that is so sad and horrifying. My heart breaks for her family. 

[walnutqueen]

TLC is possibly the worst venue for this topic - EVER.

 

That is all.

[Human]

I initially thought that.  After all, TLC has been known to be almost joyfully supportive of some heinous anti-LGBT activism.  But I can't help but think it's sort of a good thing if the Duggar leghumpers are seeing a well-rounded child who happens to be transgender and are maybe thinking she's a human worthy of respect and dignity and maybe they start wondering if their efforts to prevent her from using the bathroom is sort of not worth it.  I mean, if just one person changes their mind, that results in a potential domino effect.  

 

I just hope it stays a docuseries that ends after the last episode and doesn't turn into a recurring series.  Maybe a year hour update special, but nothing beyond that.  

[Fostersmom]

I have seen commercials for this show, but never caught it until today. I'm watching this episode right now. I have to say, I about died when the twins were being interviewed about their (fake) "work out" regime and the one asked the other if he even lifts. My oldest nephew just turned 20 a month ago, and I can't even tell you how much of a topic that is for him and I've heard the same exact words come out of his mouth so many times that I want to choke him… or at least slug him with a weight. 

 

I read the responses for the other episode I was watching, the bowling one, and I saw a couple things about mom. I can see why people aren't sure of her motivations. Mom seems very into the camera. And for the love of all that is holy, someone please take the makeup gun down a few thousand notches and break all the glasses she's wearing. 

 

Jazz is adorable and seems to have a good head on her shoulders, but she and Mom need to be less obsessed about her lack of boyfriends. It's going to be tough to find a 14 year old boy who is confident enough in himself to date a transgendered girl, let alone one who is hauling a camera crew behind her. It may be mean, and unfair to Jazz, but teenaged kids aren't exactly overly confident in themselves or their relationships and that's if no one else is questioning it. Hell, you know how many boys wouldn't talk to me or even dare to look at me as a potential date because I was fat? 

 

 

[Scarlett45]

Jazz is adorable and seems to have a good head on her shoulders, but she and Mom need to be less obsessed about her lack of boyfriends. It's going to be tough to find a 14 year old boy who is confident enough in himself to date a transgendered girl, let alone one who is hauling a camera crew behind her. It may be mean, and unfair to Jazz, but teenaged kids aren't exactly overly confident in themselves or their relationships and that's if no one else is questioning it. Hell, you know how many boys wouldn't talk to me or even dare to look at me as a potential date because I was fat?

I think Jazz and her family are handling it okay. 1. It's a storyline for the show, and 2. Discussions of sexuality and gender identity often go hand in hand.

Often young girls are told "don't think about boys" "don't be boy crazy" etc (and for good reason), but as a 29yrs old cis heterosexual female, hearing that sometimes came off as "sexual desire is wrong", "it makes you weak", "it's not important".......I think Jazz's parents want her to know she can have a life just as fulfilling as a non trans person, and that its okay to ask these kinds of questions. I would think parenting a kid who's trans, you have a fear if they keep things "inside" that would lead to depression etc......

[possibilities]

I wish they lived somewhere that she wasn't the only one (or the only one who's out). Being a teenager is hard if you don't fit in (I was a cis female lesbian teenager in the 1970s/80s and there were definitely no dating prospects in high school). But at least she knows that she's not the only one IN THE WORLD and that she can live somewhere more tolerant, or that's more of a hub for community-building, when she moves out on her own, if she wants. Some high schools actually have LGBT (and allies) clubs, lots of colleges do, and some cities have LGBT youth groups, where teens can make friends and find dates outside of school. I grew up somewhere that wasn't happening, but I used to visit a friend in NYC in the 1970s/80s, and we went to a meeting like that downtown somewhere, even though she wasn't out to her parents at the time. Nowadays there are more and more groups like that, in more and more places.