Dean

[Cee23]

I looked for an adequate topic to post this in but I didn't see one (unless there's a sub forum or something). I'm still learning how to navigate around these forums! If there's a place to discuss this, feel free to have my post moved!

I just started watching GG and I love it. I just finished the episode where Rory wants a night to herself to do laundry and order Indian food and Jess and Paris and Dean end up coming over.

Am I the only one who hates Dean? He is a psycho! So clingy, getting mad at her for every little thing, his bad temper. If this was any other show, I would expect there to be an episode where he locks Rory in a basement and holds her hostage or something. I don't know if they wrote him that way on purpose but he's got the qualities of a controlling abuser.

I'd take Jess over Dean any day

[amensisterfriend]

Am I the only one who hates Dean?

 

Ha---rest assured that you are most definitely not alone! Like far too many GG males, he was jealous, sulky, temperamental, bitter, angry, etc. And unlike most other GG males, to me he had very few positive traits to counterbalance the flaws. Even at his 'best', he was just dully "there", an undefined bore who worshiped Rory but didn't seem to have any personality or interests of his own, especially beyond his first or second appearance. I mostly blame the writing, but it doesn't help that the actor, Jared Padalecki, seemed to play even the scenes where he's supposed to be happy with a faint pout or scowl (maybe that's just his "at rest" expression?!) I never really 'got' Rory and Dean or saw any chemistry or connection between them. And I never bought that the very independent Lorelai remained so pro-Dean even when he exhibited creepily possessive, angry, stalker-esque behavior that would deeply concern most parents. 

 

I'd take Jess over Dean any day

 

As you can probably tell by my newest photo, I agree with you there as well ;)

[junienmomo]

My position on Rory's boyfriends is that they were all too human. If anything they were a little too stereotypical. Dean was they boyfriend for the perfect prom picture, Jess the bad boy who was an actual criminal and liar, and Logan was the spoiled rich boy, also an actual criminal and liar. Dean did at least back off when told to, although his pity party was pretty long and sad.

One interesting irony that I appreciate the writers pointing out was Dean and Jess changed positions of power when Jess became the boyfriend. Dean made a comment one evening, Thanksgiving, perhaps, which indicated that he was going to play that up for all it was worth. Don't remember if he actually followed through.

For me, Logan had the best potential, but we saw the writing on the wall when he proposed in public, which was essentially an ultimatum. I hold out hope for him with Rory post-series, mainly because he proved himself capable of apologizing for bad behavior and could even change sometimes. I'm less sure Jess can do that, and Dean doesn't even make the post-series list.

[blueray]

When I first watched  the show (when it aired), I liked Dean. But since rewatches I agree he is a bit clingy. Like the episode with Paris and Jess coming over there really wasn't anything going on. Sure she could have told Dean that she was having friends over, but she has the right to have a life outside of him. And honestly Paris lie about liking Jess was a pretty believable story, seeing as the two were hitting it off.

 

Then of course, I'll put this in spoilers in case the original poster hasn't got this far in the series:

 

His character is ruined by him cheating on his wife and sleeping with Rory. And honestly he didn't really fit in to the story after that point. So they had those awkard dates until he finally ended it with Rory because he realized he didn't fit into her life anymore

.

Edited October 8, 2014 by blueray

[BC Mama]

I am a proud member of the I hate Dean club! I was just watching the episode with Dean's last appearance, and it only makes me more angry with his character. He appears as the carpenter for the Twickem House museum and initially gives Luke the cold shoulder. The two have a moment of alone and Dean tells Luke that he's going to have the same problems with Lorelai, as he had with Rory, in that the Gilmores are always going to interfere and Stars Hollow is too small for her! 

 

Bullshit! Rory wants to be an international reporter, and always wanted an ivy league education. Lorelai left Hartford, and chose Stars Hollow as her home, and built her business and life there. I hate Dean for putting that doubt in Luke's mind. To me, that is just Dean wanting to deny any responsibility in his failed relationship with Rory. 

[Jfer082887]

I agree! Dean was being a bitter jerk. I feel like he wasn't taking responsibility for his awful decisions. We are not supposed to feel sorry for you. You did this to yourself! Marrying too young while still pining for Rory, being a horrible husband, cheating, and then blaming others for his actions. And Rory? I can't believe she slept with him then defended her decision to her mother by saying that he was her boyfriend first. Yikes.

[HotForBacon]

As of now (S4) I like Dean.

 

Also. He left Stars Hollow and changed his name to Sam with a brother named Dean and hunted demons. So yeah. He's awesome :D

[Mulva]

I'd feel a lot sorrier for Lindsay if she hadn't been sitting on her keister while whining for a townhouse, while Dean worked two jobs, then whining that he didn't spend enough time with her.

I can't blame him for getting fed up, although he should have formally ended it with Lindsay before jumping into the sack with Rory.

[cheezwhiz346]

I'd feel a lot sorrier for Lindsay if she hadn't been sitting on her keister while whining for a townhouse, while Dean worked two jobs, then whining that he didn't spend enough time with her.

I can't blame him for getting fed up, although he should have formally ended it with Lindsay before jumping into the sack with Rory.

I can't either, but I also think the writing for Lindsay was symptomatic of the way ASP wrote a lot of the young female characters who were not Rory/Paris/Lane. I mean, like Jess's girlfriend Shane, or the girls Lane refers to as trollops, or the other girls Rory went to high school and college with. Characters who were not main characters were often pretty flat, and the stereotypes among young female characters were particularly sucky.

[HeySandyStrange]

I can't either, but I also think the writing for Lindsay was symptomatic of the way ASP wrote a lot of the young female characters who were not Rory/Paris/Lane. I mean, like Jess's girlfriend Shane, or the girls Lane refers to as trollops, or the other girls Rory went to high school and college with. Characters who were not main characters were often pretty flat, and the stereotypes among young female characters were particularly sucky.

 

Very, very true. Yes, Lindsay wasn't very sympathetic, but I'd I see why the writers did that. Once they went forward with the seeds of the adultery, they made sure she was as flat/spoiled as possible. If I remember right, in her first appearance Rory even said Lindsay was pretty sweet  but we saw none of that later. And they must have know that the adultery storyline would have been next to impossible to swallow if Lindsay was shown to be sweet, understanding, and working or going to school instead of sitting at home and complaining.

[readster]

Very, very true. Yes, Lindsay wasn't very sympathetic, but I'd I see why the writers did that. Once they went forward with the seeds of the adultery, they made sure she was as flat/spoiled as possible. If I remember right, in her first appearance Rory even said Lindsay was pretty sweet  but we saw none of that later. And they must have know that the adultery storyline would have been next to impossible to swallow if Lindsay was shown to be sweet, understanding, and working or going to school instead of sitting at home and complaining.

 

 The truth was that was what the writers did with characters. They were cheating, deserting people when they had to prove that having the affairs or characters getting together with another. They did it with Nicole and with Chris's ex. They were cheating and people who deserted their own children. Even Anna was a controlling bitch so that's why you wanted to feel more sorry for Luke when April showed up.

[amensisterfriend]

Exactly! You guys are so right. The cannon fodder love interests were generally depicted not just as dull, but often by the end as outright unlikable to make "our" main characters' behavior. Lindsay was a lazy, entitled, spoiled brat stuck in an another century to make Rory and Dean's affair seem a little more justified. Nicole cheated on Luke at the end so that Luke could finally bow out of that relationship as the wronged party rather than delving into his own "in it but not really" passive aggressiveness throughout the relationship. Digger suddenly became an unstable stalker to help pave the way for Luke/Lorelai pairing up later that episode. Shane was a promiscuous loser to make Rory (and Jess's) lack of respect for her seem understandable. And so on :) Dean himself was then made ridiculously bitter, dopey, alarmingly angry, etc. (and this is coming from someone who *always* found Dean bitter and dopey and angry!), first to explain Rory leaving him for Jess and then to explain why she wasn't too keen on him post-adultery and was wise to be with Logan instead.

It's a really lazy, frustrating way to whitewash our main characters IMO.

 

Then again, for me Dean was never likable or well defined to begin with---it just got worse as the series progressed :)  

LOL---readster, jinx! 

[HeySandyStrange]

Then again, for me Dean was never likable or well defined to begin with---it just got worse as the series progressed :)  

 

It didn't help that Dean was constantly changed to fit the plot, either. In the first season he was the cool new guy from the Windy City, who liked semi-obscure music and books. Then, once Jess came along to fill that spot plus add the angry rebel part to it, you'd think Dean was and had always been a step above country bumpkin.  Then he was the controlling, angry dope, then the pathetic whipped married man obsessed with his ex. Yes, you are right amen, the show did white wash characters a lot and like Dean, made them into a plot device rather then dynamic characters. To be honest, I am more of a Dean apologist out of annoyance of the lazy writing that I felt was insulting to the intelligence of the audience then actually liking the character himself.

 

I'll admit, I get a tiny kick out of the fact that Jared P. has done pretty well for himself. He has been on a long running successful show, which a decent achievement for a working actor, and so I've heard (don't watch Supernatural) he has improved as an actor. Considering early on I found him even weaker then Alexis Bledel, he hasn't done too bad for himself.

[Artsda]

I just finished season 2, but I don't think Dean was that bad. He seemed pretty easy going and smart in season 1. Then season he was written different with Rory cheating, sneaking around and lying to him. He tried to hold onto a little too tight because he didn't understand this distance he was feeling. In the case of the night Paris and Jess were over, had that been reversed and Dean said he wanted a night alone but instead was off having dinner with a girl that likes him and tried to sneak her out before Rory stopped by I would expect the girlfriend to get mad too. I can't blame him for being angry because he had reasons.

 

Jess was rude, vandalizing, stealing, had no work ethic, was flunking out of school, getting into fights and yet Luke and Rory both glossed over all of it like oh well. Dean went to school, helped out when he could, held a job at the market, built a car from scratch (which they crashed and they didn't show any anger from Dean about). After seeing season 2, I felt bad for Dean and thought he deserved better. He deserved some truth too.

[readster]

 

Jess was rude, vandalizing, stealing, had no work ethic, was flunking out of school, getting into fights and yet Luke and Rory both glossed over all of it like oh well. Dean went to school, helped out when he could, held a job at the market, built a car from scratch (which they crashed and they didn't show any anger from Dean about). After seeing season 2, I felt bad for Dean and thought he deserved better. He deserved some truth too.

 

 Exactly! He went from those things to being a college dropout adultery who had to work several jobs while living back with his parents. I felt the writers just kept hammering away with the character to make everyone look better. I was very happy when Jared did finally get Supernatural and found success. I know he admitted a few years later, he hated where Dean went as a character and that he was happy that ASP had a spot for him when his other projects were not getting off the ground before SN. However, he hated what happened in the end.

[Delphi]

I'm doing a rewatch of the show and my unpopular opinion is that I like Dean.

That being said I understand why he and Rory broke up. They were young and naive.

But Lindsay was never likable to me, she seemed to always to be ungrateful or jealous even when she shouldn't be.

Season four made it worse and I see how Rory and Dean found their way back together. The affair was all sorts of wrong but had it been written differently I could honestly see Rory and Dean being end game in love at the end of the series.

[readster]

I'm doing a rewatch of the show and my unpopular opinion is that I like Dean.

That being said I understand why he and Rory broke up. They were young and naive.

But Lindsay was never likable to me, she seemed to always to be ungrateful or jealous even when she shouldn't be.

Season four made it worse and I see how Rory and Dean found their way back together. The affair was all sorts of wrong but had it been written differently I could honestly see Rory and Dean being end game in love at the end of the series.

 

 In the end, Lindsey wasn't a character, she was a plot device. She has to be written as not only naive but also flakey, lazy and not grabbing the basic concept of you have to pay bills before you party. Keep in mind, even when everything was out in the open it was Lindsey's mom who yelled at Rory and even Lorelai about what she did. Lindsey just stood there pouting like she wet her pants and momma had to speak for her because she was a little girl who was too upset. 

[Aloeonatable]

 

had no work ethic,

 

Jess was employee of the month at Walmart ;) When he wanted something he worked incredibly hard. 

 

 

built a car from scratch (which they crashed and they didn't show any anger from Dean about).

 

Dean was quite upset, I recall him kicking something when he read the letter from Rory. He had anger issues, somewhat justified, and it did bother me that he didn't break up with Rory sooner. He did admit on several occasions that he knew she liked Jess well before she admitted it. 

[readster]

 I completely agree, I think Dean would have brought things up sooner especially after the car crash. Then the break up would have happened sooner and I think Dean could have moved on easier. Instead you had him pitch a fit, break up, go with Lindsey and then the entire situation at the party and the fight. Then of course the disaster with getting engaged with Lindsey. Dean had anger issues but at the same time he didn't want to face reality when it hit him in the face until it was too late. Which really explains Lindsey, she figured if she asked for something she would get it. Never believed she had to work for it.

[Mulva]

I've known plenty of real-life Lindseys, both male and female, so I found her entirely believable.

I just think that Dean was a perfectly nice, normal boy who wasn't perfect, wasn't Rory's soulmate, who made mistakes like anyone else. I don't get the extreme vilification of the character.

[Delphi]

Agreed, I think a good half of my high school class was a lot like Lindsey. Which really explains why I don't talk to them.

I also think that they were all teenagers and prone to mistakes. I don't think anyone expected a marriage between two eighteen year olds to work out, except maybe Lindsey and her mother.

I'm completely perplexed by the parents of both Dean and Lindsey who thought that marriage was a great idea.

She wasn't pregnant and there is no way Dean was ready to be a husband.

I also can't get behind anyone thinking that it's okay for Dean to drop out of college because she wants a townhouse.

[amensisterfriend]

Interesting points! IMO, for all of GG's progressiveness in certain areas, they had some weirdly outdated ideas about dating and relationships sometimes. In the GG-verse, marrying really young even when there was no pregnancy involved was still presented as common and even the norm (Lane/Zach, Dean/Lindsay, even Logan 'needing' to propose the second Rory graduated etc---I realize that's only three examples, but it's more than half of the show's main young characters!), when in reality that generation generally marries later than the ones preceding it. We get Lindsay stuck in the '50s for no apparent reason other than to try to make the audience sympathetic to Dean/Rory's affair. We have a lot of characters with 'surprise' pregnancies, which doesn't happen nearly as often now as it did several decades ago since people today are so much better informed about birth control and more open to discussing sexuality. We have no openly gay characters. Men getting angry and jealous is still considered acceptable and even endearing on this show while the women are forever apologizing. And---well, you guys get the point :) 

 

Anyway, my main issue with Dean isn't even just the sulky, jealous, bitter and possessive thing since, as alluded to above, that applies the vast majority of GG's male characters. It's that he was just so undefined, dull, and given so few consistent, positive or even interesting qualities to balance out the negative ones. Chemistry is so subjective, but I just never saw any real connection between him or Rory. I can't even imagine what they used to talk about. 

[Artsda]

Rory was the only sane one flipping out when she heard about Dean dropping out for a townhouse. Dean's parents should have slapped him upside the head. It was good Lindsey overheard Rory ranting and asking what she does all day and saying she should get a job, but it  did nothing to make her see the light. She still showed up at his work throwing a fit because she was bored all day at home and wanted to go out.

 

Dean marrying was just stupid and made no sense especially when he didn't really love her.  There was no need for it with him just out of highschool and going to a 4-yr college.

Edited March 25, 2015 by Artsda

[Aloeonatable]

 

Anyway, my main issue with Dean isn't even just the sulky, jealous, bitter and possessive thing since, as alluded to above, that applies the vast majority of GG's male characters. It's that he was just so undefined, dull, and given so few consistent, positive or even interesting qualities to balance out the negative ones. Chemistry is so subjective, but I just never saw any real connection between him or Rory. I can't even imagine what they used to talk about.

 

I remember when he was referred to as CuteDean on another site. I never saw that even early in the Rory/Dean relationship. 

[readster]

Rory was the only sane one flipping out when she heard about Dean dropping out for a townhouse. Dean's parents should have slapped him upside the head. It was good Lindsey overheard Rory ranting and asking what she does all day and saying she should get a job, but it  did nothing to make her see the light. She still showed up at his work throwing a fit because she was bored all day at home and wanted to go out.

 

Dean marrying was just stupid and made no sense especially when he didn't really love her.  There was no need for it with him just out of highschool and going to a 4-yr college.

 

 That's was exactly it! Everyone was like: "OMG, let's pick out dresses!" Even Lorelai was happy for him. I just remember going: "Huh? What? You're 18 and barely together a few months!" I know the real reason was originally it was AS-P and company's way to write out Dean due to his working on a TV pilot that never went anywhere. Same reason why Jess was turned into mister stupid skipping school dropout so her Spin-off series could happen. The entire GG world had a very strange and very 50s marriage idea. I even remember in The Damn Donna Reed Show how Rory gave Dean's his thoughts on how his dad worked and his mom stayed home to raise the kids was outdated. Dean kind of saw it too but still wanted to do that. Well, look what he got. Not to mention if I was Dean's parents I would have been knocking him over the head about dropping out of school or thinking Lindsey could just stay at home. I mean what year did they think this was? It was also post 9/11 and while not 2008 yet. How did these two think of financially supporting each other? Let alone just Dean. I know it was to get the affair storyline front and center but wow! Getting there was horrendous and these people acted like they never lived in the real world. Even if they had smartphones and internet.

[HeySandyStrange]

 

 That's was exactly it! Everyone was like: "OMG, let's pick out dresses!" Even Lorelai was happy for him. I just remember going: "Huh? What? You're 18 and barely together a few months!" I know the real reason was originally it was AS-P and company's way to write out Dean due to his working on a TV pilot that never went anywhere.

 

 

Surely they could've found a better way to write Dean out of the show then a nonsense teenage marriage. Say perhaps have him go to an out of state school, join the military, or go back to Chicago for a job opportunity.  Even if the marriage had been the last we had ever seen of Dean&Lindsay, it still was a pretty absurd story line.

 

I actually see nothing wrong with wanting to have a modern Donna Reed type household/marriage, if both parties want that and, more importantly, can realistically support that lifestyle. Obviously, Lindsay and Dean were too young and dumb to ever be able to pull that off.

Edited March 25, 2015 by HeySandyStrange

[Artsda]

 

Surely they could've found a better way to write Dean out of the show then a nonsense teenage marriage. Say perhaps have him go to an out of state school, join the military, or go back to Chicago for a job opportunity.  Even if the marriage had been the last we had ever seen of Dean&Lindsay, it still was a pretty absurd story line.

Exactly it was so dumb, it was like they thought tunnel vision to "oooh affair" they didn't think of the fact it would have been smarter and better to just write Dean out by going to school. He could have easily still gone to Southern Connecticut State, stayed in a dorm and not be seen. He then could have had the same storyline with Rory on the episodes Jared did appear in. He could have worked at the Inn or come to town randomly. He could have ran into Rory around New Haven. They could have done the same thing without the marriage. 

Edited March 26, 2015 by Artsda

[Aloeonatable]

 

They could have done the same thing without the marriage.

 

There was more drama in the marriage plot. 

 

 

He then could have had the same storyline with Rory on the episodes Jared did appear in.

 

What story line? 

[Artsda]

There was more drama in the marriage plot. 

 

 

What story line? 

Dean showing up at Yale on errand from Lorelai, Spring Break drunk call and calling back,  Rory calling Dean to pick her up from her pub crawl bad date. Jess showing up at Yale same time Dean was, all the phone calls,  the first time, the running off the Europe, the letter.  All of it could have been done with Lindsey as a girlfriend or even fiancee and it still would have been cheating. They could have done it without Lindsey all together too. 

 

Them being married just made the majority of them look stupid, it wasn't necessary and the fact the entire town didn't think they were insane to marry (except Rory)  made the town look nuts too.

Edited March 26, 2015 by Artsda

[Aloeonatable]

It was much more dramatic that Dean cheated on a wife instead of a girlfriend. 

 

 

They could have done it without Lindsey all together too.

 

Not to any great effect. Rory was single at the time, so Dean and Rory getting back together would not have been that big of a deal, even with the sex. 

[readster]

Dean showing up at Yale on errand from Lorelai, Spring Break drunk call and calling back,  Rory calling Dean to pick her up from her pub crawl bad date. Jess showing up at Yale same time Dean was, all the phone calls,  the first time, the running off the Europe, the letter.  All of it could have been done with Lindsey as a girlfriend or even fiancee and it still would have been cheating. They could have done it without Lindsey all together too. 

 

Them being married just made the majority of them look stupid, it wasn't necessary and the fact the entire town didn't think they were insane to marry (except Rory)  made the town look nuts too.

 

 Right but as also said, it wouldn't have been as "dramatic." However, the way they had Lindsey disappear and then Dean's one episode stupid yelling at Luke situation, it fell very flat. We get that Dean screwed up his life by doing all of those things but Rory and even Jess ended up pretty happy with their lives in the end. They made their mistakes, finally learned from them and grew up and moved on. Dean, last we saw, complete college dropout living with his parents while his sister was about to go to college and he was bitter and mean. Instead of realizing he made a mistake, should have tried at least going back to school and moving on with his life. Of course the fall out between Paris cheating on Jamie with her professor I thought was poorly handled and kind of stupid too. Yes, it was a bit of a different situation but then the fallout was poorly handled and months later. No one cared much like Dean until he showed up that day because Luke knew about Dean's drunken confession before the wedding and wasn't that surprised the affair happened. I get Luke didn't say things because he felt it wasn't his place. However, situations like this happen because someone doesn't want to speak up when they should. Sadly, happened to me with my ex, I had three people that saw my ex at the time cheating on me but didn't know how to say things. Then I found out by accident because her diary fell. He reasons for cheating? She was bored with me and thought I was a little kid. Dean and Lindsey, because the were too young to be making that kind of commitment and had no idea how the world worked and Stars Hollow instead of going: "Hey!" "Shouldn't you think about this first?" They went: "Oh Happy Days!" 

[HeySandyStrange]

It was much more dramatic that Dean cheated on a wife instead of a girlfriend. 

 

Not only that, but the thing is, the adultery story might've even been pretty good had it been handled better. It could have opened some character growth up for both Dean and Rory. However, I felt the writers didn't really consider the implications of what they'd get into with subject matter as heavy as golden child Rory cheating with her married ex. Adultery stirs a lot of emotions and most of them not good. But instead the actual drama of the cheating got swept under the rug, and other then Lindsay's mom yelling at Rory in the town square, no one seemed to care or comment on the situation.

 

There were quite a few missed opportunities. Rory for once could've dealt with people in town being mad or disappointed in her, Dean could have started getting his life back together and realized the mistakes they made, they both could've realized they had romanticized their relationship in the first place and parted ways in a mature fashion. Instead, it just meandered off into nothing.

[Aloeonatable]

 

There were quite a few missed opportunities. Rory for once could've dealt with people in town being mad or disappointed in her, Dean could have started getting his life back together and realized the mistakes they made, they both could've realized they had romanticized their relationship in the first place and parted ways in a mature fashion. Instead, it just meandered off into nothing.

 

 

 

As good as the writing was on this show, at times it really failed to address some very serious issues in depth. 

[readster]

As good as the writing was on this show, at times it really failed to address some very serious issues in depth. 

 Exactly. I mean the end of the relationship was Dean: "I have no place in this world do I?" Rory nods and then goes and has fun with Logan's friends and a bit tipsy and that's all she wrote. Flash forward almost a year and then put in Dean's stupid yelling at Luke and him going: "He has a point." Which Luke should have said: "Because you don't want to move on in your life?" So many missed stories and good drama instead of just going: "Oh well, hey let's make a rift between Lorelai and Rory." 

[amensisterfriend]

There were quite a few missed opportunities. Rory for once could've dealt with people in town being mad or disappointed in her, Dean could have started getting his life back together and realized the mistakes they made, they both could've realized they had romanticized their relationship in the first place and parted ways in a mature fashion. Instead, it just meandered off into nothing.

 

As good as the writing was on this show, at times it really failed to address some very serious issues in depth.

 

Amen, sister friend(s) :) I feel like by the end of S4 the writers were uncomfortably torn between a compulsion to amp up the drama and conflict and a craven unwillingness to ever show their leads as being culpable and therefore in need of real growth. So from the end of S4 through most of the rest of the series we got a lot of Rory, Lorelai, Luke, etc. being frustratingly immature and often just plain wrong in myriad ways without usually acknowledging said mistakes and learning from them.

 

I couldn't agree more that the affair with Dean was a great opportunity to illuminate and ultimately deepen and grow Rory's character: Was she clinging to him for comfort because he reminded her of the comparatively easier pre-Yale days when she was so universally adored? How would someone like Rory deal with being reviled by many as 'the other woman'? How would what she did change her perception of herself? How would she seek to make things up to everyone involved and ultimately forgive herself? (And I mean forgive herself after processing the situation, not just ignoring it ever happened immediately afterwards like we saw on the show!) Would Dean take responsibility for his own actions or, subconsciously or otherwise, 'blame' Rory for breaking up his marriage to the point where the resentment precluded them from dating again?

 

Instead, we got a vague 'well, Rory's moved onward and upward and can't quite relate to a townie like Dean anymore...'  resolution which, as others have pointed out, could have been really interesting and relatable if done well (but wasn't!) and executed just as effectively, if not more so, if Dean hadn't been married when they reunited at the end of S4.  

[solotrek]

No one cared much like Dean until he showed up that day because Luke knew about Dean's drunken confession before the wedding and wasn't that surprised the affair happened. I get Luke didn't say things because he felt it wasn't his place.

 

Luke was going to say something to Dean the morning after the bachelor party, but Dean interrupted him and left ASAP. It seems like Luke would have said something to Lorelai but he ended up running into Rory instead. And then probably felt it was best to say nothing after the marriage happened. To be fair to Luke, he never really was able to tell anyone anything important when it mattered and then just got angry about it later.

 

What were Dean's parents thinking though?

[Artsda]

 

Instead, we got a vague 'well, Rory's moved onward and upward and can't quite relate to a townie like Dean anymore...'  resolution which, as others have pointed out, could have been really interesting and relatable if done well (but wasn't!) and executed just as effectively, if not more so, if Dean hadn't been married when they reunited at the end of S4.

 

Exactly, him being married didn't really add to the story. It still could have been done exactly with them reuniting and realizing they are in different places/going in different directions without Lindsey.

 

 

It was much more dramatic that Dean cheated on a wife instead of a girlfriend.

Fiancee would have still worked, could have paralleled even since Richard had a fiancee who he dumped/cheated with Emily, she was the other woman. Dean's cheating wasn't even that dramatic. They slept together, Lindsey threw stuff out the window, her mother yelled at Rory&Lorelai in the Town Square and that was it. Rory and Dean went on in public together after that with no scrutiny from the town, movie date, kissing at Lane's concert. There wasn't any dramatic fall out for Rory other than a small fight with her mom and getting to go to Europe. The town didn't shun them or anything, there wasn't any dramatic fall out really.

 

 

No one cared much like Dean until he showed up that day because Luke knew about Dean's drunken confession before the wedding and wasn't that surprised the affair happened. I get Luke didn't say things because he felt it wasn't his place.

I think him telling Rory not to go to the wedding was him getting involved. He may have thought it wasn't his place, but then he shouldn't have told Rory not to go. May be Rory going would have made Dean remember what he said and he would have had doubts going through with the ceremony. Rory going could have set off a different chain of events and may be prevent the affair. 

 

Luke also treated Dean horribly that double date they took with Rory/Lorelai,  whileDean fit in with them. Even explaining to Luke  how they did the movie night and decoding their reasons for going to eat at the bad food place and Luke was just an ass the entire evening because of the confession. 

Edited March 26, 2015 by Artsda

[readster]

Luke was going to say something to Dean the morning after the bachelor party, but Dean interrupted him and left ASAP. It seems like Luke would have said something to Lorelai but he ended up running into Rory instead. And then probably felt it was best to say nothing after the marriage happened. To be fair to Luke, he never really was able to tell anyone anything important when it mattered and then just got angry about it later.

 

What were Dean's parents thinking though?

 

 I always wanted more on Dean's parents. His brief appearance of his mom when Rory came over after the end of the marriage was just... weird. I get she didn't know how to handle or say things but there really needed to be more to it. It was just so... flat. How about Dean's dad or his younger sister who was also friends with Lindsey? Nothing and I mean NOTHING was ever addressed about that fallout. Or how about even when Dean admitted he was stuck at home since everything before his yelling with Luke in his final appearance. Was it meant to be constant or anything? There was nothing else but: "Dean hates his life and the 'rich' Gilmore World." Well... who contributed to it? Look in a mirror you tall moron! 

[HeySandyStrange]

So much good sense going on here. Maybe we should have been writers? LOL If I had had things my way, Dean would have broken up with Rory for good back at the end of season 2 and the character could've had a more dignified exit then how it was dragged out for ages. Especially since it was obvious from pretty early on that the writers had no intention to flesh out Dean's character past his role as Rory's first boyfriend, unlike Jess and Logan, both of whom did exist at least somewhat outside of Rory. As you said, readster, we didn't even really get to meet his parents during the time he was on the show, nor were they mentioned much.

[readster]

So much good sense going on here. Maybe we should have been writers? LOL If I had had things my way, Dean would have broken up with Rory for good back at the end of season 2 and the character could've had a more dignified exit then how it was dragged out for ages. Especially since it was obvious from pretty early on that the writers had no intention to flesh out Dean's character past his role as Rory's first boyfriend, unlike Jess and Logan, both of whom did exist at least somewhat outside of Rory. As you said, readster, we didn't even really get to meet his parents during the time he was on the show, nor were they mentioned much.

 

  The problem was, meeting Dean's parents would have meant that the writers would have tried to make them bitter and viewing the world on their own terms as we got with Jess and Logan's parents. It was like Tristan, sure CMM was going to his own show but really outside the "bad boy" who really has more to him. We never met his parents or family. Same with Paris, I really would have liked to know more about her parents but that would have meant, you know actually fleshing out new characters or existing characters. That was a No No on Gilmore Girls or when they did try to flesh out characters to add more layers. Its was like Professor Flemming's family with Paris. They got mad that he left things to her even thought Paris was just a string of young college girls he had relationships with. No: "Dad!" "Enough with sleeping with your students!" or "You were just one of many young girls he was with after our mother died, we are his children!" How about if Logan really would have gotten into trouble after yacht gate. Where the judge would have told Logan and said: "You can't keep doing this Mr. Hutzburger and just because your lawyers get you off, you have yet to learn. I'm sentencing you to 500 hours of community service and don't think about leaving the state." Would have been great seeing Logan and Rory bonding with Logan coming to realize he couldn't keep doing this and expecting to get off. It wasn't well done.

Edited March 26, 2015 by readster

[Artsda]

 I always wanted more on Dean's parents. His brief appearance of his mom when Rory came over after the end of the marriage was just... weird. I get she didn't know how to handle or say things but there really needed to be more to it. It was just so... flat. How about Dean's dad or his younger sister who was also friends with Lindsey? Nothing and I mean NOTHING was ever addressed about that fallout. Or how about even when Dean admitted he was stuck at home since everything before his yelling with Luke in his final appearance. Was it meant to be constant or anything? There was nothing else but: "Dean hates his life and the 'rich' Gilmore World." Well... who contributed to it? Look in a mirror you tall moron! 

 

They showed the sister the one time I think when Rory came over to Dean's house for a date night. The sister was very excited to see Rory, hugged her and said something about not ever liking Lindsey. Sister was definitely TeamRory. I think that was the only time we saw the mother and the father we never saw, he stayed in the basement. They supposedly came from Chicago didn't they? Just bizarre that from a mega city like that their mentality was for Dean to marry right out of high school and before going off to a 4yr college.Or maybe they moved to a small quirky town like Stars Hollow because they were so "small town" in their beliefs. His parents seemed to be more Stars Hollow and not very Chicago, it would have made more sense to just say they were always from there. 

 

I also didn't understand why the writers didn't have Dean go back to school after the marriage was done. What was Dean working 3 jobs for when he was living with his parents? Then he moved to be roommates with that guy with the hook. But couldn't he have just gone back to school? The marriage was over, Lindsey and he were done, but Dean was still doing 3 jobs instead of going back to the plan he had before Lindsey wanted new cars and a townhouse. 

 

One good thing they kept consistent with Dean and I admired was his work ethic, even if it made no sense.  

 

I wonder if the writers kind of resented all the guys going onto other shows as leads. Chad was only recurring, but left for OTH, they had Tristan go off to military school and being a jerk. Milo they wanted for that spin-off which failed badly and he went off for Heroes, Jess was epic jerk when they wrote him off. Jared had got Supernatural during the cheating/aftermath writing of season 5 writing him off not well either.

Edited March 26, 2015 by Artsda

[readster]

 

I wonder if the writers kind of resented all the guys going onto other shows as leads. Chad was only recurring, but left for OTH, they had Tristan go off to military school and being a jerk. Milo they wanted for that spin-off which failed badly and he went off for Heroes, Jess was epic jerk when they wrote him off. Jared had got Supernatural during the cheating/aftermath writing of season 5 writing him off not well either.

 

You do have to wonder sometimes. I mean with Milo at least it was from the same creator for it crashed and burned before it started or with the Bradford Diaries before he moved to Heroes. I have known shows to utterly destroy their characters because they wanted to leave for other reasons (Grey's Anatomy, 7th Heaven, The OC, Threes Company). I mean there is being professional and writing them off with grace or a major shock value to then tell aftermath stories. However, with Gilmore Girls the only one that seem to have any good send off and then forced him down our throats again with stories was Chris Sutcliff when he went to ABC for "I'm with Her." Not to mention shows like Judging Amy that had actors leave for other reasons but they brought them in and out under much better written and acted reasons. It was like two of the characters during Bunheads during the final season. I think the actors knew the show was going to end and were looking for new work and AS-P really ham fisted their characters towards the end. Don't get me started if you want to leave a Shonda Rhymes show, its a death sentence for your character. 

[JayInChicago]

Lindsey was Dean's rebound. He realized he had to move on from Rory and to him the best way was with another girl. Marrying her was just an attempt to prove to himself that he was over Rory. He apparently was never actually over Rory. He was more than a little creepily obsessed with Rory. It's odd, even though he was played and embodied as the strong, tall, silent type, he allowed himself to get so played by Rory. I have to wonder how Jared himself saw the extended "rory falling for jess, Dean gets paranoid and possessive yet doesn't just break up with her"--did it seem plausible? 

 

I don't know, the more I watch(ed) the less I liked Dean. Cute!Dean or whatever made sense on the first watch, but it doesn't really hold up.

[readster]

 We knew that Lindsey was Dean's rebound but as many of us had pointed out. To go from rebound to engaged in that short of time, especially at 18 was really ridiculous. I also have to wonder what Jared's thoughts were on the "longing for Jess" when it first came up. I think he got Tristan but then it was almost an exact repeat but with more sexual attraction and more "moron bad boy" with Jess. That he probably thought: "Wouldn't Dean get that apparently Rory can't stop looking at other guys who aren't like him?" Because that's how it came off. Yes, I have this great boyfriend but outside of mad I didn't say: "I love you" back. As soon as I see a guy who is a "rebel without a cause" I need to long after him. It was like with Paris cheating on Jamie with Fletcher. "I finally have a great boyfriend who was my first everything but I need to go sleep with a man who is almost 50 years older than me because HE's A MAN!" Then I'll sleep with my coworker because I can't do better than either of them ever again. Yeah, huh?

[Aloeonatable]

I don't think Dean felt threatened by Tristan. He knew Tristan liked Rory, but knew Rory didn't like Tristan. At the end of LDAT it was a misunderstanding when he saw Tristan and Rory together at Chilton. With Jess, it was a definite threat to his relationship with Rory. He saw the way she looked at Jess in Bracebridge and when she went with Jess on the lunch date, he should have broken up with her at that time. He even admitted it to Lorelai that she "likes Jess," but he still wouldn't break up with her because (1) he was in love with her and (2) she kept sending him mixed messages. 

[readster]

I don't think Dean felt threatened by Tristan. He knew Tristan liked Rory, but knew Rory didn't like Tristan. At the end of LDAT it was a misunderstanding when he saw Tristan and Rory together at Chilton. With Jess, it was a definite threat to his relationship with Rory. He saw the way she looked at Jess in Bracebridge and when she went with Jess on the lunch date, he should have broken up with her at that time. He even admitted it to Lorelai that she "likes Jess," but he still wouldn't break up with her because (1) he was in love with her and (2) she kept sending him mixed messages. 

 

 Very true. There is a big difference but there was the point he admitted to Lorelai that he knew. She should have responded: "Then you know what you have to do." That would have done it instead of the horrible makeout war at the danceathon later on. 

[GreenScreenFX]

Lorelei never would have said that to her daughter's boyfriend.

[readster]

Lorelei never would have said that to her daughter's boyfriend.

Lorelai learned to not say a lot of things over the course of the show when she should have. 

[GreenScreenFX]

And that is a good example. Lorelai never would have said that.

[Aloeonatable]

 

And that is a good example. Lorelai never would have said that.

 

Why don't you think that Lorelai wouldn't say that to Dean? I know she liked Dean and would have hated to admit to anyone that Rory was falling for Jess, but as Dean had confided in Lorelai about Jess before (ATAT) wouldn't she give him some advice. She at least should have encouraged him to confront Rory about her feelings. Though, now that I think about it, Rory really got upset with Lorelai when Lor talked to Dean at the bid-a-basket.