S17.E11: Ross Matthews vs. Acting!

[davidcalgary29]

Our queens return to the Werkroom to gather and read Arrietty's farewell Mirror Message, where we find that Arrietty has departed from traditional comic tones to take a personal, and nasty, dig at Onya's undiscussed medical condition. The queens are all subdued by this turn of events, which really casts a shadow on Arrietty's otherwise fine run on the show. Why would you do that on an internationally-broadcast show? Why would you do that at all? After a few sombre beats, most of the queens remember to congratulate Lydia on her win and try to gamely move on with the show.

Everyone's in better spirits the next morning as the queens gather in the Werkroom to be greeted by Ru in a cropped houndstooth jacket that is an interesting variation on his usual Werkroom attire, but not really an upgrade from his usual full suits. It's time, he announces, for an acting challenge! The queens scream and clap over the news, as they have been instructed to do, although my smile would have quickly faded when Ru announces "...with Ross Matthews!" And I mean Ross has been fine as a skit host over the years, but an actor he is not. Will this maxi-challenge break that trend? SPOILER: No.

Scripts are handed out and the queens delight over it! I'm not sure what drugs they hand out to contestants to fake this level of enthusiasm, but it would appear to be a side-hustle for WoW worth pursuing if they can sell it to the general public. The general plot appears to be a pastiche of Reality TV tropes gathering at an Algonquin Luncheon setting, hosted by Ross as "Truman Capote", resulting in "comic mayhem" as The Human Condition is Revealed. We then get an awesome montage of the queens attempting to praise our long-dead Mr. Capote with platitudes, clearly revealing that they have no idea who he is. This is, actually, the funniest part of the entire episode, but I hated to laugh at the queens, as they're clearly trying to be respectful to someone famous they only know for being "flamboyantly homosexual". Well he was, at that, so at least they've got the basic premise. This is not the way to Teach The Children, Wow.

The queens are quickly ushered onto the set, where they're greeted by Cheyenne Jackson, who accepts their screams with grace. He's a fine looking man, but appears rather tired on this day as he slouches in his chair. Or maybe he's just tired of having to appear on lame comedy skits? But he, and the queens, press on. A number of queens appear to require ample coaching and takes, but it's all a red herring, and the flubs here make absolutely no impact on the final product. 

Back in the Werkroom, the queens prepare for the night's runway. As this season's been lacking weird drama since Hormona left the show, production has been left scrambling to find anything to capture the viewers' interest, hence tonight's "A" plot: Suzie Toot Versus The World! Suzie and Lexi are scene partners in their part of the skit, and there's some good-natured ribbing between them before Lexi begins to take everything seriously, and then spirals, and then enters her safety zone of The Inner Saboteur. The other queens heckle the two, adding fuel to the fire, in between expanding the "B" plot of the episode, which is making everyone seem lovable except Suzie Toot. I have no idea what they're doing with Suzie's edit, as she's too adorkable to be good villain material, and seems pretty far from winning the season at this point, but whatever. But seriously: Onya doesn't need anything more than her talent to help her, WoW.

It's the Main Stage! Ru enters the stage in an orange mishmash, continuing her trend of unflattering silhouettes on the runway. WHO is dressing her these days? We are joined by Michelle, Ross, and this episode's Special Guest Star, Sam Smith, who graces us all in George V cosplay. I like the look for them. The theme of tonight's runway is "The Black and White Ball", and while the queens do try their best, there's not much going on here. Sam opens with an overaccesorised checkered harlequin; Lana has a puffy-sleeved, polkadotted bodysuit; Onya is ugly in a black fusion of a ballgown and Bjork's swan dress; Lydia tries to give oversized sleeves more time in the spotlight, although that trend was played out five minutes after it started; Suzie is a Flappercat; Lexi appears to have forgotten half of her outfit in the Werkroom; and Jewels struts out in a graphic dress that's embellished like a Zoot Suit. "It belongs in the Smithsonian!" Michelle raves during critiques, summing up the judges' love for this look, but I'm not that impressed, and I don't like the hair that she pairs with it. Sam dislikes Suzie's Flappercat, claiming that it needed to be "cinched" in the waist. Well she wasn't going for an actual catsuit, was she SAM? I'd expect them to know their fashion references, at the very least. Whatever, Sam.

We're then treated to "Ross Matthews vs. The Ducks", and the best that can be said about it is that Onya's in it. All of the queens actually do all right, even though Lydia is too understated and stiff, and Jewels' closing monologue is paced flatly and not particularly entertaining. You can tell that they're all just doing the best they can with the material, though. Unfortunately, all of the queens' bits are separated by Ross' solo scenes, in which he attempts to channel Mr. Capote's wit and camp mannerisms into an effective performance. Despite Ru's generous laughs at his scenes, he fails. Why is WoW doing this to us? Have we not faithfully watched every season of this show? Fortunately, the skit is pretty short and we get down to judging.

Judging is pretty perfunctory here: Onya had the only good performance, and everyone else was fine, or worse. Ru desperately tries to inject some excitement in the proceedings by trotting out that ol' Drag Chestnut, "Who Should Leave...And Why?". Why, we were just discussing that in the comments last week! The timing is impeccable. But the results here are a dog's breakfast, because almost everyone thinks Suzie's a threat, and largely name her over more sensible and obvious choices. Except maybe Sam, who just seems to hate her.  Well, that one came out of left field. "Oh come ON", Suzie moans in confessionals. "I don't deserve to leave THIS EPISODE", and she's entirely right, which is why this segment is lifeless, and pointless, and largely dumb. The panel pretends to be interested in the answers. 

The Judges decide to throw Sam (who was fine) a bone and into the top, delaying her execution until they announce Onya's unquestioned win. Brava, Onya! Despite Ru's ominous warning that "the only thing to do is eliminate Suzie Toot", she's declared safe with Lexi. Lana, Jewels, and Lydia are thrown in the bottom, and Ru ultimately decides to save Jewels, who probably gave the flattest performance.

Lydia and Lana are forced to lipsynch to "Unholy", an alright song that I sort of enjoyed a few years ago, while being watched by George V and the rest of the panel. Both of the queens appear to do all right for a moment, until Lydia literally gets tripped up by her outfit and pauses her routine to extricate herself. At that moment, it's all over, and while I'm not really a fan of what Lana's doing on stage, there's no coming back for Lydia. Lana stays! Lydia gracefully exits the competition. 

Next week: it's time for monologues. With dancing! I am crossing my fingers that the queens will have to interpret that fine Canadian classic, The Regina Monologues, but am not holding out much hope at this point in the season. But since monologues are one of Suzie's self-declared strengths, I predict more dickery at the hands of Production! We are nearing the end, after all, and the path must be cleared for The Winner.

 

Edited March 15 by davidcalgary29

[Fake Jan Brady]

Thanks for your recaps @davidcalgary29; they're always entertaining and save me from watching the episode.

[ashleytylerjohn]

I can see the George V and hadn't thought of that ... my brain went straight to "channelling Edward Gorey illustration."

[Starchild]

  On 3/15/2025 at 4:22 AM, Fake Jan Brady said:

Thanks for your recaps @davidcalgary29; they're always entertaining and save me from watching the episode.

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@davidcalgary29 is a treasure!

[davidcalgary29]

Aw, thanks for the kind words, guys. I really do these "Weecaps" as a homage to the much-missed Television Without Pity, which had some really talented writers (where are you, Potes and Miss Alli?) and was always a blast to visit. The loss of that site was like a cultural lobotomy.

[Madding crowd]

I thought the skit was a fun spoof of the Capote Vs Swans show on FX although I knew who the swans were and don’t know the celebrity housewives. Suzie is still my favorite and it made me sad so many of the queens voted her as the one who should go home. Not a fan of Lexi and her everlasting angst. I thought Jewel’s runway was fine but didn’t get the extreme fawning over it.

[Shinyshiny778891]

  On 3/15/2025 at 12:58 PM, davidcalgary29 said:

Aw, thanks for the kind words, guys. I really do these "Weecaps" as a homage to the much-missed Television Without Pity, which had some really talented writers (where are you, Potes and Miss Alli?) and was always a blast to visit. The loss of that site was like a cultural lobotomy.

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I miss the days of TWoP recaps, thank you for your recaps.  My favorite line of this week's is "We're then treated to "Ross Matthews vs. The Ducks", and the best that can be said about it is that Onya's in it." 

[Ananayel]

  On 3/15/2025 at 12:58 PM, davidcalgary29 said:

Aw, thanks for the kind words, guys. I really do these "Weecaps" as a homage to the much-missed Television Without Pity, which had some really talented writers (where are you, Potes and Miss Alli?) and was always a blast to visit. The loss of that site was like a cultural lobotomy.

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Miss Alli (Linda Holmes) writes for NPR and hosts the podcast Pop Culture Happy Hour https://www.thisislindaholmes.com/

Sars runs an online bookshop and occasionally writes about true crime https://www.realityblurred.com/realitytv/2025/03/read-handed-gypsy-rose-michael-stewart-and-sisters-of-mercy-true-crime/

Dan Kois (Dan Kwa) writes for Slate and writes books https://slate.com/author/dan-kois

Pamie and Stee are more into the film/tv production now https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stephen_Falk

Heather and Jessica run GoFugYourself and have written some books. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Go_Fug_Yourself  They also have a Substack called Drinks with Broads https://drinkswithbroads.substack.com/about

There are a few more out there, but I'm old and can't remember. I miss that site so much.

 

On topic : What are the odds the top two are Onya/Sam, with Suzie Toot third? 

 

[janeyjay]

  On 3/15/2025 at 3:29 PM, Ananayel said:

Heather and Jessica run GoFugYourself and have written some books. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Go_Fug_Yourself  They also have a Substack called Drinks with Broads https://drinkswithbroads.substack.com/about

Drinks with Broads is wonderful and H&J often recap shows like Severance and The White Lotus -- plus they have live chats during big events such as awards shows. 

 

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On topic: I want to like Lexi because I find her charming when she's not getting in her own way. Onya is still my fave but Sam is growing on me (in a good way -- not like a fungus)

Edited March 15 by janeyjay

[TiffanyNichelle]

The way all the queens are so obsessed with Suzie being the biggest competition when really Onya is running away with the competition. She's never been in the bottom, yes, but she's usually more safe than in the top. Ru and the judges adore Onya and everything she does and yet they keep sleeping on her. Do they really not see her as a potential winner? Lexi should be worried about Onya more than Suzie.

Lydia should have keep hopping around the stage in that tight skirt because that scissors fail really took her out. I think that even if she could barely move around the judges would have eliminated Lana because it really was her time, imo. I think Lana goes home next week for sure. I can't see her making top four by accident.

Edited March 15 by TiffanyNichelle

[Starchild]

  On 3/15/2025 at 6:46 PM, TiffanyNichelle said:

I think that even if she could barely move around the judges would have eliminated Lana because it really was her time, imo.

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And Lydia was really doing better, her face was selling. She would have won if she just help hobbling around with those hilarious expressions.

[davidcalgary29]

  On 3/15/2025 at 6:46 PM, TiffanyNichelle said:

The way all the queens are so obsessed with Suzie being the biggest competition when really Onya is running away with the competition. She's never been in the bottom, yes, but she's usually more safe than in the top. Ru and the judges adore Onya and everything she does and yet they keep sleeping on her. Do they really not see her as a potential winner? Lexi should be worried about Onya more than Suzie.

 

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Two things: first, I think that some of the other queens are really reacting more to Suzie's unflagging self-confidence more than anything else: in the middle of a semi-scripted televised competition, it would probably be very jarring for some competitors (translation: Lexi) to see and hear someone seemingly brush off every stray piece of criticism and stay true to her own ethic when you're drowning in self-doubt.

Second, I don't think anyone's sleeping on Onya, really, but she's so far out in front that Suzie presents as the only real viable should the unthinkable (ie. being exposed as the Mastermind behind Ru's Evil Fracking Empire) happen to Onya at this point. Onya really hasn't shown any challenge weaknesses, but Suzie has a lot of flaws as a potential winner, and the other queens can smell blood in the water. 

[Kaboom 2.0]

I found this episode boring other than Onya's Big Fupa channeling Bob during Bob's Cookie Lyon character back on Bob's season of Drag Race and seeing Jewels' runway look. 

I think Onya loves the other queens' obsession with seeing Susie as the bigger threat to them, Onya can just skate on through the episodes, racking up wins and being fabulous. 

I feel bad for Lydia, those scissors took her out during the lip sync. I thought both she and Lana were slowly improving but if it weren't for those damn scissors, I thought Lana would have been sashaying away, not Lydia. 

[Red Bridey]

  On 3/17/2025 at 3:54 PM, Kaboom 2.0 said:

I found this episode boring other than Onya's Big Fupa channeling Bob during Bob's Cookie Lyon character back on Bob's season of Drag Race and seeing Jewels' runway look. 

I think Onya loves the other queens' obsession with seeing Susie as the bigger threat to them, Onya can just skate on through the episodes, racking up wins and being fabulous. 

I feel bad for Lydia, those scissors took her out during the lip sync. I thought both she and Lana were slowly improving but if it weren't for those damn scissors, I thought Lana would have been sashaying away, not Lydia. 

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She wasn't smart enough to make her wardrobe adjustments during the break, as it was a dead certainty she would be lip syncing. But I guess that's the downside of optimism! Or she could have just stood there and you know, acted the song. It didn't require a lot of those ridiculous acrobatics the queens like to toss in. 

[SemiCharmedLife]

I love, love, loved Jewels' runway look.  So unique and stunning.  

The queens naming their biggest threat as who deserves to go home is a no-no.  Mama Ru was not happy about their evasive answers.  It is strange that they see Susie as the threat when Onya and Sam are doing just as well or better.

[Absurda]

I'm guessing they either like Susie less and would prefer her to go or they see her as an easier target than Onya or Sam. 

I'm not a Susie fan but I will say her only weakness seems to be her belief that she's a comedy genius and everyone else is just too stupid or low brow to appreciate her humor.  Even if she's not in the top, she's not in the bottom either.

Onya's weakness has been design challenges, she always does poorly in those.  Sam has only recently started showing herself to be something other than a pretty face and great outfit.

[bluvelvet]

I have ONE thing to say *lip smack*
 

Lexi needs a therapist STAT!!