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Well that, and the smile that she plastered on her face suggested that something wasn't adding up for a win. I wasn't really invested in any of the finalists, but should make it clear that I don't think that Nymphia is a poor choice for a winner: my problem is with the writers, and not her. She was so underwritten as a character during the season -- she was presented as schtick on top of Schtick -- that it's hard to remember any moment from the show where she wasn't self-produced or making fart noises. Something really went wrong with the writers, here, and I'd be sort of curious to know exactly what that was.

The Finale is finally here! Thankfully, WoW wisely decides to reward viewers for perservering through what has sometimes been a slog of a season by presenting us with a largely brisk, entertaining hour of celebration. After reintroducing all of the season's contestants -- Plasma in particular is sleek and sophisticated, and Amanda really needs makeup lessons -- each of our three finalists get high tempo numbers to showcase their branding. Nymphia is pretty good, and Sapphira is sophisticated and assured, but Plane gets saddled with a boring number which attempts to celebrate her basic fashion choices. She does not look happy about this, and I do not blame her. This time. Plane is quickly cut, and we get a surprise when both Xunami and Sapphira are crowned Miss Congeniality. "Cool!" I think. "The first winner also to get Miss Congeniality!". And boy am I wrong, as after Nymphia provides a zesty lipsynch to "Padam Padam"...she wins! Wow,was I wrong about the outcome on this, and it doesn't make much narrative sense in the context of the season, as she rarely was its focus. Still, her fashion was killer and she's absolutely got some stellar dance moves. Still: what happened, Miss Cristal?

All-cast lipsynch battles have emerged as some the most popular episodes on each of the seasons on which they're featured, for two very good, and two very important reasons: they're hard to fuck up, and production riggory (usually) takes a back seat to talent. This week's no different, giving us one of of S16's best episodes in the process. The process is similar to what we saw on Canada S4: a queen picks their opponent, who then chooses the song; the winner then moves on to the next round. They really should have just imported the Canadian scheme wholly by allowing all (or most) to pick their song and/or opponent, because that was a total blast. Here, results really are mostly good, although the best lipsynch -- a fiery matchup between Morphine and Geneva -- is in the first round, and an unexpectedly frisky Plasma gets unfairly eliminated because she's stuck in a clunky threeway designed to favour Mhi'ya. Still, everyone does well and Megami turns in a Silky-level series of lipsynchs that makes her the star of the night. She even probably wins her last battle, though it's also great to see Morphine get a great win. SPOILER: Amanda's makeup is still terrible, as she looked thoroughly botoxed, and, disturbingly, somewhat like a present-day Judith Light/Steven Tyler hybrid. Happily, she no longer looks like she's taken one of Hannibal Lecter's facial trophies and asked a couple of five-year-olds to decorate it with fingerpaints before trotting it out to the panel. Still, I forsee a long, and perilous, journey for our heroine before she escapes The Land Of The Busted. Next week: The Finale! Finally.

Bring back Salina and Marcia! Oh, wait -- wrong season.

Nymphia looked great for her cover, but that runway was not a winner for the category. Ru's laugh has replaced all other sound cues as a harbinger for success (or lack thereof). Yes, yes, Sapphira's great -- but her schtick is just not that funny. Whether she deserved to leave or not, Q's elimination just leached all remaing tension out of this season. Nymphia is not going to win -- nohow and noway -- and Plane has a shot only if Sapphira's tiny boobs decide to get their revenge and eat her Finale costume and makeup, forcing her to be styled by Amanda. Next week's lipsynch "smackdown" could be fun, but I hope we're not just heading to a $50,000 paycheck for Mhi'ya who -- despite her considerable skills in dance -- just didn't add much to the season.

As our contestants return from the last elimination, everyone pretends to care about Morphine, and the queens manage to think up some nice things to say about her. It's called caring, people! Meanwhile, Sapphira reminds everyone that the last five episodes have been pretty much pointless in altering the trajectory of the season, and that the writers have already written her into the Finale. Brava! A truly dumb mini-challenge segues into a listless maxi-challenge in which the queens are tasked with performing in a cute photoshoot to sell their autobiographies, which seems nice of WoW until we realize it's just a framing effort to flog Ru's new book. It's an okay concept, I guess, but S2's sister challenge was really a lot more fun. Despite some teases during some rather dull interviews with a rather blank Matt Rogers, we actually don't get any of the queens' anecdotes -- this could have been a spoken-word showdown! -- the episode trudges its way to a rather uninspired runway in which most of the queens miss their category, and Q makes the tragic mistake of reminding everyone of Sapphira's Raggedy Ann Schmatte from last week with an orange number that makes her look like a giant party favour. Nymphia is tossed a win despite presenting the most cliched and off-topic look, leaving a defeated Q and a blank Plane to squirm around the stage a bit. Q wins her lipsynch, and is promptly booted from the season, clearing the Finale of Sapphira's only real competition. Boo! I'll type it again: BOO. Next week: Nope, still not the Finale.

Scarlet really needs to adjust her paint or find a style that works better for her face. You wouldn't think that it's that hard -- she's that physically beautiful -- but i thought she looked better on S11 than on either of her subsequent appearances. I don't hold her sourness at her ouster against her. Hannah was fine this season, but I really haven't gotten over her subpar (and problematic) Down Under run.

Congrats to the winner! I have to say that I was NOT expecting that outcome, but am delighted with it.

Because RuPaul can't leave well enough alone, we get a second hour-long advert for WoW's Vegas empire! This time, our queens are tasked with making over a group of dancers from Drag Race Live! On the plus side, all of our sacrifices are willing and able and they all have similar builds, so it's a pretty even playing field. The downside: they're all willing and able, so tension is essentially nil. Ru tries to sweeten the pot by suggesting that those who endure this drudgery are actually trying out for a spot in the Vegas Live Show, but the queens just laugh nervously at the concept, thinking of their already onerous contracts. Overall, it's a pretty subdued reaction to what seems to be a steady gig. Rehearsals are fairly straightforward, but Plane attempts to spice up the Werkroom by promising to reclaim her Inner Bitch and leave the idea of emotions to robots such as Brooke Lynn Hytes. She then throws that concept away by chatting and bonding with her dancer. Stick to your plan, Plane! You only have a week before the finale. The results are all fine, although Plane is a clear top, and deserves her win. Sapphira does the worst, and knows it, but is infuriatingly smug as she knows that she can just squat on the Main Stage and she'd still stay. And that's exactly what she does in a completely subpar lipsynch with Morphine, who channels her frustration into an effective performance. Morphine leaves, surprising only those who have never watched the show, and seems angry and defeated but only because she probably didn't read the last page of her script. You did try, Morphine! Next week: sorry, but it's not the finale.

I've enjoyed Scarlet's Drag Race journeys, so I was somewhat sad to see this one come to an end tonight. Any regret was tempered by the success of Tia, who continues to provide the light and joy of this season -- it would just be something of a slog without her. I hope she wins it all at this point, although it looks like we're being set up for a Marina win. That would be fine, too, but a Tia win would just be the perfect cap to the season. This has not been the right venue for LGD, who hasn't been able to showcase her true excellence. Did I say that we need AS:France, before? We need it!

I don't think that anyone has a problem with a Sapphira win. The problem for viewers at this point is that the writers have leached all the fun and tension out of the season by underlining the fact that she is the only viable winner: Q is getting the Bitter Betty edit, Nymphia is...Nymphia, and, because I enjoy writing it, I'll type it again: Plane is not winning the season. WoW just hasn't learned anything from AS5 and AS8: Sapphira has the stuff to win it all cleanly, but it looks like they've decided to rig the end of the season for her anyway, which would lead to an unsatisfying ending for a wholly worthy queen. Just let them compete!

In this his week's mini-challenge, Ru tasks our beloved contestants to recreate her groundbreaking paint from her iconic Project Runway appearance! Ru then pays homage to Darienne's newest side gig (after 0:30, if you don't want to watch it all) by making the queens spread their joy all over the Pit Crew, making no one uncomfortable in the least! A satisfying (for her) win leads Plane to a carefully choreographed Journey Through the Secret Life of Plants Emotions, leaving her momentarily discombobulated and discomfited. She explains that she doesn't want to show emotions in a carefully-controlled emotional breakdown, leading to the audience to collectively appreciate their sense of irony -- and a group hug! It's a smart pivot, but she's still not winning the season. A less successful maxi challenge seeks to recycle AS4's fun nightclub challenge -- with a trip to the bathroom! Most of the results are ugly and/or unfunny, and Dawn is unfairly sent to the bottom after she presents, with Nymphia, what is clearly the best product with a clever concept and skillful execution. But Sapphira (and Plane) win again, because WoW wants to flush all the tension out of the season. Wins are meant to be spread around, people! Also: VELOUR IN A TOILET. After a runway that feels awfully familiar, if only because Morphine recreates an-above average Melinda Verga lewk in gold, Ru leans into late-season tropes and boots Morphine and Dawn to the bottom with little sensible reasoning. Morphine cleans the main stage with Dawn and lives to move on to what will probably be her last episode, and departure from the season! Goodbye, our little elf! I can't explain the results either. Next week: chaos ensues at makeover time when all the remaining queens are tasked with transforming Amanda Tori Meating into a runway-ready drag queen using only Silky's Sharpies! Plane struggles to assimilate Data's Emotion Chip into her orbitofrontal cortex.

Crave FINALLY uploaded S2, so I've been binging. I have to say that I'm enjoying this quite a bit more than S16 -- and Tia is more than half the reason for this. Marina's probably going to win the whole thing, but I wouldn't continue to watch if it wasn't for Tia's confessionals. She really is a true delight to watch. I want her to host the regular UK season!

It's interesting to compare this with Manila's problematic performance on Snatch Game in S3 which, while also handled poorly by the panel, at least hinted at a broader discussion about how the gay community often plays a part in enforcing stereotypes we should be trying to eliminate. It's been a detriment to this show that the panel has moved from pointing out contestants' problematic attitudes -- however obliquely -- to studiously ignoring them at all points. The panel's deliberate refusal to discuss or confront racism on Down Under has been especially infuriating. I'll also say that this trend has led to chaotic and impenetrable judging. Nymphia was "so much stronger" than Morphine...but was only deemed to be "interesting"? Nymphia was a "powerhouse" in the performance but the panel won't explain why they felt that way even though she leaned on stereotypes to do that? I call bullshit.

After Dawn trolls Plane into a volcanic rage in what turns out to be the best and most successful comedic bit of the episode, and a fun mini-challenge, RuPaul devastates the queens and viewers by announcing that it's time for the most dreaded challenge of the season: team panel challenges with topics chosen to vex the contestants and try the patience of the audience! Fortunately, Plane and Q bring plenty of Dad jokes calculated to make Ru cackle, and do the best in the challenge, so of course they don't win. Congratulations, Sapphira! A largely fun runway leads into an inevitable lipsync between two queens the franchise had given up on three episodes ago, and an even more inevitable elimination that also should have happened three episodes ago. Goodbye, Mhi'ya, our flipmaster! No one can say you didn't give your all for five minutes every episode.