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S03.E03: Porch Lyfe


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As Tricia makes inroads with a very important country club member, Sam finally agrees to go to the doctor for the first time in years. Meanwhile, Joel and Brad attempt to make space for each other’s individual needs – together.

Premiere Date: November 10, 2024   HBO   10:30pm

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Gotta be honest - it gives me the willies when Joel talks about needing to “tee tee.”

I was glad that Sam finally unloaded about Susan’s BS. There was no way she could hold that in for long.

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I was like hmm, not much is happening in this episode. But I guess it was just building to the end. I really liked the scene when Sam was finally honest with Joel. I felt the emotions.

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Man, I feel for Sam. Her life is so painful right now. 

I could relate to that doctor visit. My health is pretty good. My weight isn't too bad, but I sometimes find myself answering questions just like Sam did. The drinking and the exercising. I'm sure doctors are used to patients lying or bending that truth like that. I loved how real that appointment was.

I had to look up 'Iceland's' real name. Vislundur. I could call him Vis, but I guess I'll just keep calling him Iceland. Anyway, I hope he and Sam get together. I think they'd be great together. I bet this show ends with Sam actually seeing Northern Lights.

I was surprised, but pleased, with how Mitch welcomed Tricia's business offer. I think in other shows he would snub her, so it's nice to see things work out. So far.

I also like what I think the show is doing re relationships. They're not perfect. Joel is having some issues adjusting to being with Brad. Fred is having some issues with Susan. But Joel loves Brad. Fred loves Susan. No relationship is perfect.

My favorite part of the show is seeing Joel and Sam together. Love Joel. "Lot of humanity in that bathroom." "He has such a deep voice. I can feel it in my tummy." The friendship fund. Seeing them together helps my heart.

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5 hours ago, peeayebee said:

My favorite part of the show is seeing Joel and Sam together. Love Joel. "Lot of humanity in that bathroom." "He has such a deep voice. I can feel it in my tummy." The friendship fund. Seeing them together helps my heart.

💞

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I had the same thought, that I'll bet Sam winds up going to see those Northern Lights, whether or not she's with Iceland. There's something really wonderful the way the show makes it clear that he does something to her. She's always so nervous and babbly in his presence. And it's not that she has a crush on him. I think he just represents a possibility for her she can't completely name. (I can feel it in my tummy!)

The arc of the show started with Sam feeling so alone and lonely after Holly's death, then she found happiness with community, and now she has to go back to being alone without being lonely. It's a good juxtaposition with the couples we see now, where Sam's friends are avoiding important issues just as much as she is--everybody does it.

It was a relief to hear Fuck Susie too. Fuck Susie!

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Why did Sam tell the doctor her parents are in Texas? Was this a cover for her mom being in a care facility? Surely those in her community would know her dad had died? I was confused by that. 

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5 hours ago, Juneau Gal said:

Why did Sam tell the doctor her parents are in Texas? Was this a cover for her mom being in a care facility? Surely those in her community would know her dad had died? I was confused by that. 

The actor who played the father died in real life, but the character is still alive.

Bridget Everett has said that they don't like the idea of killing the character off, and so they chose a happier ending for him where he's off on a boat in Texas. Presumably he moved his wife to a care facility there.

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I had completely forgotten that. I thought the character died, too. But isn't the mom in an assisted living home? Now I'm completely confused about what happened with the parents.

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13 hours ago, Juneau Gal said:

Why did Sam tell the doctor her parents are in Texas? Was this a cover for her mom being in a care facility? Surely those in her community would know her dad had died? I was confused by that. 

I think she's telling the truth and that's the way they're telling the audience that that's where they are. 

Sam's dad didn't die, only the actor playing him did. Sam's dad went traveling around, and I guess we're supposed to assume he eventually settled in Texas and the wife is there too. That's why the doctor asked how they were enjoying it--she did know they were in Texas because everyone in town knew.

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I thought the mom was in a nursing home. I also thought Tricia made some comment this season about needing to pay the home or else their mom would be thrown out. Am I remembering this wrong?

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38 minutes ago, peeayebee said:

I thought the mom was in a nursing home. I also thought Tricia made some comment this season about needing to pay the home or else their mom would be thrown out. Am I remembering this wrong?

You are correct, Tricia did say that. 

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19 hours ago, nameless slob said:

You are correct, Tricia did say that. 

 

5 hours ago, peeayebee said:

So then Sam DID lie to the doctor when she said her parents were in Texas?

I assumed that since last season, while the father was traveling, the mother was moved to a home in a different state, the father had just settled in Texas and so moved the mother to home near him in Texas.

I just can't see how Sam would either be lying or even have a reason to lie. Especially since, iirc, the doctor, who knew the family, was the one who brought it up.

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Did Trish make the comment about having to pay their mom's nursing home this season, or last season?  I remember conversations at the end of last season about that.  That would be a weird inconsistency for a rather simple show.

I don't really want Sam to get together with Iceland.  Sam's a mess.  Getting a boyfriend, or even just a fuck buddy, isn't going to help.  I'd be fine with them being friends, but there's a whole lot of weirdness going on there.  I also find it weird that you're renting your house to someone from Iceland, and you don't even say in the first conversation, "so, what brought you to Kansas?"

I need a reminder... what was Sam doing for a job before being a bartender?  Didn't she work with/for Trish?  Why is she so broke?  How does Trish have so much money?  Yeah, I know, she got money in the divorce, but she's bought a Cadillac SUV and now a fancy country club membership?  She and her husband weren't that wealthy.

I'm glad that Fred is openly bitching about Suzie.  Can't even have a Diet Coke???  That's so not a good sign for that relationship.  I'm glad both Sam and Joel were open about not liking Suzie, too. 

 

 

 

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9 hours ago, peeayebee said:

I was wondering about the spelling "Lyfe" in the ep title. What's the significance? 

I think "lyfe" is kind of a hip-hop spelling of "life," and so it's meant to be ironic. Just a guess, though!

Re: Sam's parents - I think the writers were always more interested in the father than the mother. We barely saw the mother last season, and I'm guessing they don't want to spend time on her this season. It looks like she was moved to a care facility in Texas so she could be closer to her husband, and maybe Trish and Sam are helping out with the cost.

Re: Trish's money - apparently she's making a fortune off of the obscene pillows. You would think she would throw some more of it to Sam, as Sam seems to be helping her with them a lot.

Sam used to work at that office where she met Joel. Now I guess she divides her time between tending bar and helping with the pillow business.

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2 hours ago, chaifan said:

I don't really want Sam to get together with Iceland.  Sam's a mess.  Getting a boyfriend, or even just a fuck buddy, isn't going to help.  I'd be fine with them being friends, but there's a whole lot of weirdness going on there.  I also find it weird that you're renting your house to someone from Iceland, and you don't even say in the first conversation, "so, what brought you to Kansas?"

 

I could be wrong, but I feel like the point of Iceland is more role model than romantic possibility. He's very okay with himself alone with his dog and he's very calm, which makes Sam even more nervous around him, it seems. And if he can come to Kansas, she can visit Iceland and see those northern lights. This isn't a guy who spends time thinking about all the things wrong with him.

I've heard the actor playing him is very well-known in Iceland and he filmed all his scees at once. (I'm going to feel silly if I actually heard that on this board!)

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3 hours ago, chaifan said:

Did Trish make the comment about having to pay their mom's nursing home this season, or last season?

You may be right. Maybe when this season started there was a recap that included Tricia saying that.

 

36 minutes ago, sistermagpie said:

I could be wrong, but I feel like the point of Iceland is more role model than romantic possibility. He's very okay with himself alone with his dog and he's very calm, which makes Sam even more nervous around him, it seems.

I feel that way, too. He seems to have a great attitude and outlook. I get the sense that he's pretty content, though who knows. Anyway, I think she'll learn from him more than get sexually involved. I kind of leapt to that assumption (that they'd get involved) because he seems to like Sam, and she needs some happiness. But it would be better (and more keeping with the show) if she finds her happiness within.

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36 minutes ago, sistermagpie said:

I could be wrong, but I feel like the point of Iceland is more role model than romantic possibility. He's very okay with himself alone with his dog and he's very calm, which makes Sam even more nervous around him, it seems. And if he can come to Kansas, she can visit Iceland and see those northern lights. This isn't a guy who spends time thinking about all the things wrong with him.

I like that theory.  But with Sam's financial situation, I can't see her putting what little money she has left to a trip to Iceland.

1 hour ago, Blakeston said:

Re: Trish's money - apparently she's making a fortune off of the obscene pillows. You would think she would throw some more of it to Sam, as Sam seems to be helping her with them a lot.

I was also wondering why Sam wasn't getting paid for her work with Tricia. 

 

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On 11/13/2024 at 5:20 PM, chaifan said:

Did Trish make the comment about having to pay their mom's nursing home this season, or last season?  I remember conversations at the end of last season about that.  That would be a weird inconsistency for a rather simple show.

If I remember correctly, in the S3Ep1, Tricia needed Sam to go get the rent check from "Iceland" because it needed to be deposited by the ?th of the month to pay for the home or mom would get kicked out.

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Right now Joel seems like Sam's only ally. He cares so much for her. The problem is that he is just a cheerleader which isn't always good. Maybe right now that's what Sam needs but at some point she will need someone to be straight with her and help her try to find happiness in her life.  Tall order. But making some changes to her health would be a good place to start. It doesn't seem like she has any girlfriends which is unusual for someone her age, but maybe Joel is her "girlfriend." I hope Sam would be open to some constructive criticism since she would do that for Joel and probably will when his relationship with Brad goes south.

Sam being on a positive course to happiness would be a welcomed ending to the show.

 

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On 11/13/2024 at 8:01 PM, Blakeston said:

It looks like she was moved to a care facility in Texas so she could be closer to her husband, and maybe Trish and Sam are helping out with the cost.

They are renting out the farmhouse on behalf of their parents, and using the rent money to pay the assisted living home where their mother lives.

On 11/13/2024 at 8:01 PM, Blakeston said:

Sam used to work at that office where she met Joel. Now I guess she divides her time between tending bar and helping with the pillow business.

Joel rented out his house and paid Sam some money to live with her, sleeping on her couch.  That's why Sam has less money now; Jowl is living with Brad.

On 11/13/2024 at 9:01 PM, sistermagpie said:

I could be wrong, but I feel like the point of Iceland is more role model than romantic possibility.

"Iceland" is definitely interested in Sam.  He came all the way to the bar to give her the check as a pretense to see her.  He didn't even want a drink. 

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