S06.E01: Higher Love

[HerkyJerky]

The pods are now open. Contestants try to make love connections through a wall, and a romantic revelation causes a stir in the women's quarters.

[HerkyJerky]

Some interesting characters so far.  Matthew is a trip! I laughed out loud when he left the pod without saying goodbye when that woman was droning on.😆

[suzeecat]

Watching this show really makes me realize just how old and cynical I have become.  The giggling, flirting and coy banter is just so - Ugh!  I may just wait until some of the later episodes come out because that's when you see who these people really are.

[Bobcatkitten]

I didn't laugh when Matthew walked out. I thought it was rude as fuck and maybe why he has never found a woman yet. 

[HerkyJerky]

2 hours ago, Bobcatkitten said:

I didn't laugh when Matthew walked out. I thought it was rude as fuck

I guess I should clarify that I laughed because it was so astonishing rather than appropriate!

[Snapdragon]

I am so disappointed in Matthew!  I was feeling his and AD's little love story and thought his early awkwardness might be due to autism or something.  But that ending?  Where she found  out he was saying the exact same lines to the other chick?  My hat off to you, editors, because I did not see that coming!  What a jerk!  

I also felt bad for the guy who found out that Lady#1 that he'd been talking to had a kid and then right after finds out that Lady#2 had been married before (sorry, I can't remember any of their names).  I feel that he was so thrown by getting big news like that back to back that he was too emotionally exhausted to respond well to Lady#2, who will now probably end up with the big dude with the bad 80s haircut.

Good start to the season though.  Not sure how much love will be found but at least everyone's interesting, so far.

Edited February 17 by Snapdragon

[SummerDreams]

Poor AD, her and me both never saw that coming. I mean, he was not even discreet about it, he was just saying the same lines. Why is this man there, is he so desperate for some (bad) publicity or some cameras chasing him for a couple of months? Doesn't he respect that some people are actually there to find a spouse? I mean, even the guy who wanted to know how AD looked to decide if he would propose seems better in my eyes than this incinsiderate jerk. I hope he gets what he deserves from dates, from family, from friends and acquaintances now that his dirt has been revealed.

I don't like people hiding they have kids on the first dates. I mean, I have a dog and I consider it one of the most important things about me that would be first or second to say on a first date about myself. It's not fair to let someone get attached to you only to reveal that you have a kid later on. It's disingenuous as f. If I were that guy, I'd just stand up and leave, and I wouldn't care what America would think of me.

[Snapdragon]

45 minutes ago, SummerDreams said:

 

I don't like people hiding they have kids on the first dates. I mean, I have a dog and I consider it one of the most important things about me that would be first or second to say on a first date about myself. It's not fair to let someone get attached to you only to reveal that you have a kid later on. It's disingenuous as f. If I were that guy, I'd just stand up and leave, and I wouldn't care what America would think of me.

In my opinion, you shouldn't even be on this show if you have kids.  It's completely irresponsible.  If you as an adult want to roll the dice and marry someone after knowing them six weeks, then fine but dragging a kid into that?  No way.  Having a step parent is a major life adjustment and the fact that the kid will have zero time to adjust to the idea or really get to know that person before having to live with them?  How traumatizing is that?  And wouldn't you want to make sure the person isn't a creeper or at the very least actually gets along with your kid?  I'm a parent and there is no way on earth that I'd even do something so reckless and insensitive to my kids.

[Empress1]

6 hours ago, Snapdragon said:

In my opinion, you shouldn't even be on this show if you have kids.  It's completely irresponsible.  If you as an adult want to roll the dice and marry someone after knowing them six weeks, then fine but dragging a kid into that?  No way.  Having a step parent is a major life adjustment and the fact that the kid will have zero time to adjust to the idea or really get to know that person before having to live with them?  How traumatizing is that?  And wouldn't you want to make sure the person isn't a creeper or at the very least actually gets along with your kid?  I'm a parent and there is no way on earth that I'd even do something so reckless and insensitive to my kids.

Amen. I say the same thing about Married at First Sight. Further, if I were the ex/co-parent, I’d freak out. You met this person a week ago and they’re now my kid’s step-parent? Living in the house with them? Let me tell you what we’re NOT going to do. Her telling men she dates she has a kid should be the first thing she says, if her kid is “the most important part of [her] life.” It makes it look like she’s hiding it.

Poor Jimmy. He seemed totally beaten down. 

On 2/16/2024 at 10:26 AM, Bobcatkitten said:

I didn't laugh when Matthew walked out. I thought it was rude as fuck and maybe why he has never found a woman yet. 

Rude as fuck! I thought he was so cold and unfriendly, although I did laugh when he told the story of him telling his therapist he was doing the show.

I like AD a lot - she seems like someone I’d be friends with. I hope she finds someone good. When Matt said he’d been thinking about her all the time I went “aww,” but THEN. Same lines verbatim?!

Clay. Sir. What show do you think this is? Get on Tinder and keep it moving.

Not a lot of bras! Also I keep hearing my grandmother’s voice saying “take your feet off the furniture.”

[SummerDreams]

9 hours ago, Empress1 said:

Her telling men she dates she has a kid should be the first thing she says, if her kid is “the most important part of [her] life.” It makes it look like she’s hiding it.

It's obvious that she is there to get some short term reputation. Her saying "i don't want to say it from the start because I want someone to know me for who I am" is bizarre and offending for herself and her kid. Isn't your kid a part (the most important one) of who you are? Why are you hiding it then? Are you regretting having it maybe? Thoughts are coming to mind with her behavior.

A truly sincere person who is there to get married would say this from the very start "hi, I'm X, I'm that many years old, I work as a __ and I have a kid who is that many years old". Hiding it makes her desperate to be chosen just for the trip and the reputation.

[Chicago Redshirt]

1 hour ago, SummerDreams said:

It's obvious that she is there to get some short term reputation. Her saying "i don't want to say it from the start because I want someone to know me for who I am" is bizarre and offending for herself and her kid. Isn't your kid a part (the most important one) of who you are? Why are you hiding it then? Are you regretting having it maybe? Thoughts are coming to mind with her behavior.

A truly sincere person who is there to get married would say this from the very start "hi, I'm X, I'm that many years old, I work as a __ and I have a kid who is that many years old". Hiding it makes her desperate to be chosen just for the trip and the reputation.

I think single moms are in somewhat of a catch-22 situation. I can appreciate a woman thinking that a man will jump to conclusions based on the single motherhood status (desperate to get married, easy lay, or whatever) and not fairly give the compatibility and potential of the relationship a fair shake. I think honesty is the best policy but I wouldn't want to be ruled out from the jump because I had a kid, or to have a date think that he is has a path to get some by doing X or doing Y.

Now coming on a show where you're dating 15 guys, drinking a lot, and everyone's cursing...I think that it's probably a weird thing for singles, but it's probably a particularly poor idea for someone who already has a kid. I imagine that in 5-10 years her kiddo will be embarrassed as hell when people have seen her mom laying out a thirst trap for a dude on Netflix.

[nlkm9]

I always thougt fillers and botox were for people who wanted to look younger. These are very young people, and the fillers actually make them look older, the mom of the 10-year-old is actually very pretty, but the fillers are harsh.

Color me shocked with the reveal at the end about Matthew,sheesh

[SummerDreams]

4 hours ago, Chicago Redshirt said:

I think honesty is the best policy but I wouldn't want to be ruled out from the jump because I had a kid, or to have a date think that he is has a path to get some by doing X or doing Y.

My way of thinking always have been, be totally honest and whoever leaves because of your truth, you just dodged a bullet way sooner.

[Chicago Redshirt]

1 hour ago, SummerDreams said:

My way of thinking always have been, be totally honest and whoever leaves because of your truth, you just dodged a bullet way sooner.

100 percent agree. But that is easy from my perspective. May not be as easy in the midst of a streak of jerks who bailed at the first mention of a kid, or even a single seemingly nice guy where that became an issue or a long time solo, etc etc, In general in the middle of dating, it is hard to have perspective that many more times when things didn't work out it was a blessing.

[Chicago Redshirt]

I will also say: while I can imagine doing this experiment as a 20-30something guy and proposing to a woman sight unseen, I don't think I would consider proposing to a single mother without knowing substantially more about the child than it is possible to find out here. In this case, all your info comes from a biased source who has every incentive to portray her as the greatest kid in a few millennia. You can't know whether the kid will be too clingy, has developmental issues, psychological scars or straight up won't like you.

The pods allow you to test your chemistry with a possible spouse. There's no way to test your chemistry with the child, or to know how the baby daddy fits in. In the Real World, I would tend to think most mothers would not even introduce a date to their child in the first few weeks of dating. In this show, you're supposed to get married in that time.. That would just be too soon to test whether there's a potential bond there. And for those cases where the relationship results in "walking away forever," I think it would be extra harsh on a kid. At least with the adult heartbreak that happens, you can say that the participants agreed to take  that risk. A kid can't.

Edited February 18 by Chicago Redshirt

[DearEvette]

7 hours ago, SummerDreams said:

It's obvious that she is there to get some short term reputation. Her saying "i don't want to say it from the start because I want someone to know me for who I am" is bizarre and offending for herself and her kid. Isn't your kid a part (the most important one) of who you are? Why are you hiding it then? Are you regretting having it maybe? Thoughts are coming to mind with her behavior.

I think it is a "it depends" sort of thing.  The timing in the pods is on the show is always a little deceptive and they play with continuity.  We know that the first few dates are very, very short.  And they get longer as you start to weed out people you don;t vibe with.  It makes no sense for her to say anything on first date which might be all of 10 minutes and then the second round which only goes to 30 minutes.  So I get it that she might wait to see who she likes and they get into the longer dates where she'll disclose.  It felt like it was pretty early in the process when she told Jimmy.   We have no idea who else she was dating or might like since her storyline was clearly the love triangle with Jimmy and Chelsea.

Reminds me of the discussions we had about Carlton and Diamond about when he should have disclosed he was bi to her.  At least Jess told Jimmy before a possible proposal.  LOL.

I am sooo disappointed in Matthew.  Man. what a rollercoaster.  I went from thinking... what an asshole.  To thinking... maybe he is neurodivergent and just can't handle a deviation from a prepared script in an unfamiliar situation (I had a boss like this and it was ... interesting).  To thinking... ok maybe he's not so bad he and AD are really great together.  To thinking.... well, damn.  He really is horrible.  I wish he had stayed the guy we sw with his first interactions with AD, because I am not feeling Clay for her.  He seems to lack the understanding of the whole purpose of the experiment. And he's annoying.

[SummerDreams]

34 minutes ago, DearEvette said:

It makes no sense for her to say anything on first date which might be all of 10 minutes and then the second round which only goes to 30 minutes. 

Why? Isn't it a part of herself? She is a mom, this defines her among other things like she is a teacher or she is divorced or she has 3 siblings etc.

36 minutes ago, DearEvette said:

It felt like it was pretty early in the process when she told Jimmy. 

But he said "how come we haven't discussed this all this time?" or something similar.

[Empress1]

8 hours ago, SummerDreams said:

My way of thinking always have been, be totally honest and whoever leaves because of your truth, you just dodged a bullet way sooner.

Especially when it comes to kids. You don’t want someone in your kid’s life who doesn’t want to be there. Kids/no kids is a fundamental compatibility issue and should be treated as such. I’m someone who likes to talk about the big compatibility issues very early - before the first date, in some cases, if we’re talking about apps (I screen out certain things). 

[Irlandesa]

I don't have kids so I can't speak to how realistic this is but one reason I've seen that single mothers don't disclose their child immediately is to avoid predators who target single mothers.  And we know this show doesn't do a lot in terms of background checks. 

I think arguments can be made for disclosing on the first date and for waiting until the second.  It does sound like she waited too long, though. 

 

[JenE4]

What an emotional roller coaster—and we’re only on episode 1! AD is the protagonist I’m rooting for here. Unfortunately she went from two solid options to zero in a flash! Matthew seems to be on the Autism spectrum and had some tough starts, so it was really touching seeing him learn to open up to AD and be very sweet with her. His therapist would be so proud! This was in stark contrast to the smooth operator, Clay, who is probably the player type she warned us she always falls for. We got a little foreshadowing that I only saw in retrospect when they had AD tell us everyone was being coy and keeping their matches close. I nearly fell off my couch when Amber gave us a line-by-line reading of the exact same pre-proposal and escape plan! I even tried to justify it—could it be neurodivergent Matthew just got confused and thought this other Amber was our Amber Desiree, AD?!?! Unfortunately I don’t think that makes any sense, but, nooooo, AD, you don’t deserve this!!!

[Lindz]

What a weirdo!!!! How's he gunna present a list of questions then run when they're asked back?!!! That's a conversation!!! He really didn't seem like he actually wanted to give anything a chance & ran to avoid being rejected. 🤷‍♀️ I'm shocked he finally stopped running & talked to AD. Don't appreciate his other Amber dates not being shown.

[Lindz]

Clay's another weirdo. How dare he basically require her to describe her looks. WRONG SHOW!!! He shouldn't have been allowed on the show! That middle part in her hair ain't it.

[HorrrGoodnight]

I'm late to the party, started binge watching season 6 after I came across a viral spoiler. I found out that the walk out scenes from Matt were edited, so that made me feel a teeny tiny bit better about it 😄