S14.E11: The Case of the Missing Phone

[PrincessPurrsALot]

Folks,

While the conversation did take a fun turn, civility matters.  Please keep the conversation civil.  You can disagree without disavowing the other poster's right to post or to use language they choose.  Posts have been removed. 

[Yours Truly]

On 9/26/2023 at 12:10 PM, ichbin said:

What a bunch! Although I find enough not to like about her I'm beginning to appreciate Sai most of all simply because of how mirrors my thoughts when she comes right out and says, "I don't care!" to some nonsense from one of the others.

TPTB got their diverse cast. Know what's not diverse? Their overall unlikeability. Bravo wanted a group of women who more accurately reflected the city...instead they got a group who more closely demonstrate the stereotype of rude, self-centered, and nasty well-to-do New York City residents.

The original cast may have shared some of the negative attributes but at least they showed some actual fun and humor. 

While I do appreciate this about Sai I don't like it when she does it to shut a conversation down AFTER she's participated and said HER peace. 

I’m all about minimizing a conflict or argument that’s gone on too long or needs to be squashed but sometimes she likes to do this in a mean girl “nobody cares” kinda way and that’s when it bugs me. It also takes a slight condescending tone making whoever is invested in the conversation seem simple and ridiculous.

Again, some of these interactions deserve this sort of an attempt at moving on but she sometimes does it in a disrespectful way.  It also bugs when she chimes in with this tone from the outside when other parties are trying to hash out their shit that has nothing to do with her. I get that sometimes it’s beating a dead horse but popping in with an eyeroll and a “who cares, whatever” approach annoys me.

I still think Sai is OKAY for now and as long as she doesn’t go too far over the line with her little condescending tendencies then I can stay on board with her. Sometimes she can pull it off and lightens everyone up to shift the energy and sometimes she comes down hard with it in a nasty way. So we will see what her percentage is with regards to how often she does either. Mean girl, or fun friend trying to deescalate from a merry go round discussion and move on. Hmmmmm.

 

Edited September 27, 2023 by Yours Truly

[Yours Truly]

22 hours ago, ZaldamoWilder said:

 

I wish dafaq I would call one of my parents with:  so and so snatched my glasses off my face because I pulled a prank on her.  My daddy would've said and she ain't baldhead yet?  That move was wild as shit.  I understood Ubah being pissed, but the physical escalation that followed when Erin said she heard her name, was begottamyond.  In the culture (and I know that whether she gets the phrasing correct or not, she's been here long enough to understand colloquialisms) when you physically advance on someone in a move that cannot be interpreted as anything other than hostile, that's referred to as a run up.  Now, as a general principle, en masse, culture of origin notwithstanding, black folks have a very Newtonian, reciprocal philosophy about the initiation of conflict1   We've even got an all encompassing description for it:  Consequences and Repercussions (capitalization intented).  To whit, the proper and complete conclusion of that phrase is:  say it with me congregation:  Run up...get done up.  That should be self explanatory, but if not, the basic tenet is:  for every action, there is an equal and similarly grimy reaction.  Try me at your own risk. 

 

 

 

ALL. OF. THIS!!

Especially that last part!! LOL

Meanwhile my explanation AFTER I handled that mess would have been "Don't start none, won't be none" with a simple shrug of the shoulders. 

 

[JohnnyU]

On 9/26/2023 at 10:15 AM, MaggieG said:

n the one hand I can kind of understand Ubah's point

As I have said in the past mostly when watching, I don’t follow as closely as I should and I may have missed something but imagine you losing your phone that has passwords in it and whatever kind of photos etc. etc. and you’ve lost it and you’re looking frantically for it and it’s not really merely “lost” but someone knows you’re looking for it for 45 minutes and they don’t give it to you until THEY feel like it.   Did they enjoy that shit?

that would piss me off, but maybe I did not Follow what happened exactly correctly….also maybe I just detest Erin because of qualities I think I see in her (still trying to give her the benefit of the doubt for now tho) that have caused me much torture and heartache over many years.

 

Edited September 28, 2023 by JohnnyU

[hoodooznoodooz]

2 hours ago, JohnnyU said:

As I have said in the past mostly when watching, I don’t follow as closely as I should and I may have missed something but imagine you losing your phone that has passwords in it and whatever kind of photos etc. etc. and you’ve lost it and you’re looking frantically for it and it’s not really merely “lost” but someone knows you’re looking for it for 45 minutes and they don’t give it to you until THEY feel like it.   Did they enjoy that shit?

that would piss me off, but maybe I did not Follow what happened exactly correctly….also maybe I just detest Erin because of qualities I think I see in her (still trying to give her the benefit of the doubt for now tho) that have caused me much torture and heartache over many years.

 

Oh, no! You had an Erin in your life? 
 

Did she dish it out, but couldn’t take it (and would start crying)?

No sense of humor? 
 

I hope that she is no longer in your life.

[JohnnyU]

10 hours ago, hoodooznoodooz said:

Oh, no! You had an Erin in your life? 
 

Did she dish it out, but couldn’t take it (and would start crying)?

No sense of humor? 
 

I hope that she is no longer in your life.

Gaslighting, taking zero accountability, cruel on purpose, blames everyone else, emotionally and mentally abusive (not sure if Erin is), causes you to walk on eggshells, plays the victim, believes they are superior to everyone while also having a deep sense of self-loathing (again, not sure of Erin), etc etc.

still in my life.  For now.

Edited September 28, 2023 by JohnnyU

[Yours Truly]

I get Erin's reaction in the pool when she started tearing up. Ubah was being hella childish and even if I was on her side about all the valid reasons why a missing phone is not a fun experience (I left my phone in an Uber the night before I was leaving vacation early the next morning and my ID, credit cards and of course all other conveniences like my electronic boarding pass saved on my phone) but Ubah was really trying to get the other girls to be mad at her. I mean Ubah wants to torture Erin that's her decision but the way she kept trying to get the other girls just as mad at Erin as she was was really going too far. I don't like that shit. It's like she was truly trying to get the other ladies to start attacking Erin too. 

I don't think I like Ubah to be honest. She's a bit too full of herself in a stank way. I am all about being fabulous. Hell I used to defend Luanne ALL. THE. TIME cause Luanne WORKS it! I love that Luanne isn't gonna let other people tell how she has to act, that she can't be extreme and that she has to dim her shine. I get how Luanne was a bit much at times but I loved her presence. I loved how, for the most part she at least always wanted to have a good time and not be so damn serious. Luanne had a personality that warranted the reception she received not to mention looks but with Ubah, she seems to walk into a room expecting admiration instead without giving off much warmth. 

Ubah just walks around as if she's owed admiration. I have no problem with Ubah speaking her mind and voicing her issue with the Erin but what I cant get behind is 1) the aggressiveness. It was aggressive and unacceptable FULL STOP. 2) Her trying to justify her aggressiveness and reassigning it as something else.  3) Her continuing to harp on it in such a rude and immature way throughout different portions of their daily activities. 4) Her need to deliberately create an uncomfortable environment for Ein AFTER Sai asked repeatedly for her to let it go because she didn't want it to continue to disrupt the group as a WHOLE. 

Even though I've mentioned that Sai shutting down a conversation with her whole, I'm tired of it and I don't want to hear it anymore can be problematic for me she was right in doing so in this instance. She probably would have been better served by saying "okay Ubah you monopolized the day with you negative energy long enough, I for one don't want to continue to suffer for Erins mistake so we need to stop making this a group problem and shift it into a you and Erin problem. I'm done with you hijacking our whole outing with this and holding us hostage so take that energy somewhere else or drop it!" 

Sai making it about herself (you see, Sai deciding SHE is done with it can be received negatively) gave Ubah the opening to tell Sai well then don't get involved. Cause that's how I feel about Sai inserting herself. Girl, I ain't talking to you so keep you opinion to yourself. However, in this instance Sai had a right to shut it down cause Ubah had been dragging out her tantrum and I'm with Sai. Bitch, shut up already, you're making the WHOLE table uncomfortable you self centered brat! Get a grip already!

Ubah's need to drag the women on her side like a 12 year old child really lost her points with me. Not to mention that she again advanced towards Erin in an aggressive manner when they were in the pool. I get being unhappy with someone but Ubah's way of handling conflict seems to be to agressively bully them relentlessly until they scream uncle and that tells me that Ubah hasn't fucked around and found out with the wrong one yet. Just sayin' .

Edited September 28, 2023 by Yours Truly

[adore]

On 9/27/2023 at 7:06 AM, wallies said:

Tired of Jenna bowing out of filming to work. Conference calls and spreadsheets do not make exciting TV. What happened to actual "housewives" on this show?

I wish I could upvote this a million times. I want to watch housewives! 

[kristen111]

I just noticed.  Erin FAKE laughs a lot.  She pretends to have a good time, but really does not.

[kristen111]

Why did no one call Ubah’s phone?  I doubt Erin put it on mute.

Edited October 2, 2023 by kristen111

[tvfanatic13]

16 hours ago, kristen111 said:

Why did no one call Ubah’s phone?  I doubt Erin put it on mute.

Kristen111- why do you apply logic to these shows? LOL

[Dibs]

Maybe I'm missing something because I don't own/use a "smart" phone myself (I don't wish to become one of the zombies forever staring at it and compulsively scrolling through it day and night), but if she NEEDED to call her family, she couldn't borrow someone else's phone?  They're all constantly in their hands like an extra appendage.  I took it to be more the overreaction of an addict losing her fix.  As for forgetting it in the vehicle (twice), I call producer antics.  See: like an appendage.

Also, I like Erin.  Guess I'm the only one?

[Dibs]

23 hours ago, kristen111 said:

I just noticed.  Erin FAKE laughs a lot.  She pretends to have a good time, but really does not.

I wouldn't, either!

[heatherchandler]

On 9/27/2023 at 1:48 PM, Yours Truly said:

While I do appreciate this about Sai I don't like it when she does it to shut a conversation down AFTER she's participated and said HER peace. 

I’m all about minimizing a conflict or argument that’s gone on too long or needs to be squashed but sometimes she likes to do this in a mean girl “nobody cares” kinda way and that’s when it bugs me. It also takes a slight condescending tone making whoever is invested in the conversation seem simple and ridiculous.

She’s a mean jerk.  She brings something up to make someone look bad, then when that person has a reasonable explanation, she SCREAMS “who cares???!”  Ummm you do.  And she can’t just shut everything down with that!

 

On 10/1/2023 at 6:23 PM, kristen111 said:

I just noticed.  Erin FAKE laughs a lot.  She pretends to have a good time, but really does not.

She is so fake.  I’m surprised someone (her sister, Abe, friends?) hasn’t let her know that it’s a bad fake and she’s not fooling anyone.  She thinks she brings the fun.  Uugh 
Everything about her is inauthentic.

Edited October 3, 2023 by heatherchandler

[ZettaK]

On 10/1/2023 at 8:07 PM, kristen111 said:

Why did no one call Ubah’s phone?  I doubt Erin put it on mute.

They wanted to create fake drama.

[hoodooznoodooz]

23 hours ago, Dibs said:

Maybe I'm missing something because I don't own/use a "smart" phone myself (I don't wish to become one of the zombies forever staring at it and compulsively scrolling through it day and night), but if she NEEDED to call her family, she couldn't borrow someone else's phone?  They're all constantly in their hands like an extra appendage.  I took it to be more the overreaction of an addict losing her fix.  As for forgetting it in the vehicle (twice), I call producer antics.  See: like an appendage.

Also, I like Erin.  Guess I'm the only one?

Most likely, Ubah didn’t write down their phone numbers anywhere else.

 

I applaud your decision to abstain from a “smart” phone!

I like Erin very much when there’s no conflict.

[hoodooznoodooz]

On 10/1/2023 at 8:07 PM, kristen111 said:

Why did no one call Ubah’s phone?  I doubt Erin put it on mute.

Yes, one of them should have called an Ubah. 🙃