S2.E07: Shandon

[PrincessPurrsALot]

Original air date 2020.08.31

[IvySpice]

God, what a tragedy! I didn’t think the dad would stick to the bottom line, so I’m at least glad that he’s not enabling Shandon, but that was a daisy chain of pain if I’ve ever seen one. The mom would have been all of 36 when she died? And lung cancer is not a pleasant way to go or for loved ones to watch. What kind of denial does it take to watch your daughter’s tricks come and go at all hours and just “guess” what she’s doing to make money? Damn straight, life is not fair. None of that was fair to anyone.

[Empress1]

I felt so bad for Shandon. It was one of those episodes where you think, you know what? I get why you use. There was another Canadian fentanyl addict on the show whose name I can't remember, though I can picture her (she was emaciated, tracks all over her arms); she, too had had a hard life and was tricking to support her habit. It seems like when you get to fentanyl, you're pretty bad off.

10 hours ago, IvySpice said:

The mom would have been all of 36 when she died? And lung cancer is not a pleasant way to go or for loved ones to watch

I wondered if the family that had painted her as a woman who abandoned her kid made any kind of amends to her before she died, or apologized to her daughters for it. It sounds like no, given what the eldest sister said at the intervention - that the father continued to talk shit about both his wives. At least she died knowing her daughters knew the truth. I liked that her older sister said straight up that she'd been horrible to Shandon when they were teens - she owned her shit.

Watching Shandon turn tricks and bawl trying to find a vein in her father's place was really heartbreaking. With the amount she was doing, I'm surprised she was alive, to be honest.

On the superficial: the sister was coloring her hair dark (I could see her roots growing in, and she was blonde in childhood pictures), and I think that was the right call. I wanted to shave the father's head and start over.

[IvySpice]

56 minutes ago, Empress1 said:

the sister was coloring her hair dark

Her eyebrows, too. It looked good. Until I noticed the roots, I thought it was natural, and it enhanced her beauty. Shandon and Alana were both so pretty. I wonder why newlywed Alana's wife wasn't at the intervention? It seemed like Alana was doing pretty well (nice house, marriage, smart aesthetic choices).

When Alana said she wanted Shandon to care about herself, Shandon said something like, "Just don't worry about it. I don't." Yeah, Shandon, Alana isn't on enough fentanyl to kill an elephant! She has to feel her feelings.

[Empress1]

17 minutes ago, IvySpice said:

Until I noticed the roots, I thought it was natural, and it enhanced her beauty.

Me too. I thought "Oh, one blonde, one brunette sister" for most of the show until I noticed the roots at the intervention. It definitely looked good but it's probably a pain to keep up - I had a friend in college who went from blonde to black and she gave it up because it was too much to stay on top of, because you look like you're balding if you let the roots grow in too much. (I also suspect her hair was fairly destroyed, as she'd been bleaching it before she dyed it black. According to social media, she has stopped the coloring altogether.)

20 minutes ago, IvySpice said:

I wonder why newlywed Alana's wife wasn't at the intervention? It seemed like Alana was doing pretty well (nice house, marriage, smart aesthetic choices).

It seemed like the bulk of the family tragedy fell to Shandon. I don't think Alana was sexually abused or bullied (she WAS a bully to Shandon, by her admission), and while the mother's death and the sibling favoritism would have hurt her, it seemed like she was able to move past it. I wondered if the older two sisters were close to the younger one, given that they felt like their stepmother favored her over them. Youngest Sister said she wasn't particularly close with Shandon; I wondered if Shandon minded that.

[cynicat]

2 hours ago, Empress1 said:

I felt so bad for Shandon. It was one of those episodes where you think, you know what? I get why you use.

I was thinking the exact same thing.  Holy crap, she was sexually molested at 6 years old, and everyone completely ignored it because it "hurt too much to face it"??  That's fucking messed up.  And hey, kids are, and have always been very mean when they see someone who doesn't 'fit'.  But I can't imagine having to face that level of bullying in school, only to go home and get bullied there by her family too.  Shit, I'd be mainlining anything and everything.  She is so broken, I don't know if she can ever be repaired.

[OoogleEyes]

10 hours ago, Empress1 said:

I wanted to shave the Dad and start over.

What was UP with the dad's hair? I think that he's the source of a lot of this family's issues. Not wanting to talk these issues. 

This was a very sad episode. I wonder where Shandon is today 

[sara416]

I really with I could find an update on her since this was filmed in 2018. I wanted to crawl through my tv and do something to help her when she was sobbing and trying to find a vein. Why didn't her "friend" who brought her the stuff stay and help her? You could just hear how much pain she was in. She was one of those addicts where I could actually see through all the shit and see what other people were saying about her. I can see that she could be a kind and caring person, but because of all her trauma she hated herself so much. I really hope she was able to find some help. This one was rough. 

[pasdetrois]

Quote

I wanted to shave the father's head and start over.

I wanted to jerk him baldheaded. He is a worthless human being.

Childhood bullying is heartbreaking. We have experienced it with special needs family members. It doesn't stop at adulthood, either.

When Shandon's classmates tricked her into going to the wrong house for a party, then laughed and taunted her, I was reminded of a long-ago Intervention episode about a young man who was special needs. He invited friends to a restaurant and no one showed up. That was one of the few episodes where substance abuse was not involved. I have never forgotten him.

I guess the odds are high that Shandon will not survive street fentanyl.

[sara416]

6 hours ago, pasdetrois said:

 

When Shandon's classmates tricked her into going to the wrong house for a party, then laughed and taunted her, I was reminded of a long-ago Intervention episode about a young man who was special needs. He invited friends to a restaurant and no one showed up. That was one of the few episodes where substance abuse was not involved. I have never forgotten him.

 

That was John C. He was diabetic and not taking care of himself. Unfortunately, he passed away in 2014. I remember that scene too, it was heartbreaking. 

[Starchild]

On 9/1/2020 at 11:06 AM, IvySpice said:

I wonder why newlywed Alana's wife wasn't at the intervention? 

She was there, I saw her, she even had a letter in her hands. For some reason they didn't show her saying anything.

[mythoughtis]

Shandon’s Dad is one of those type B people that don’t want to deal with anything that is unpleasant and therefore doesn’t deal with it.   Wouldn’t be an attentive dad to his children, but didn’t want Mom to have custody.  Didn’t get his abused daughter help.  Didn’t stop the bullying.  Won’t put down rules for his drug addict daughter.  And whines about how rough he had it as a dad. Exactly what did his current girlfriend see in him? 

Shandon  sure loved showing off her ‘assets’ even in situations where it was only her family present.  

 

Edited September 4, 2020 by mythoughtis

[IvySpice]

Quote

Shandon's classmates tricked her into going to the wrong house for a party, then laughed and taunted her

I have worked with a young man on the autism spectrum who was bullied like that in COLLEGE. He ended up expelled from college because of what they tricked him into doing. It was like some middle school nightmare from an after-school special. So...I can believe some real dark shit happened to Shandon.

[hookedontv]

Oh Shandon, what a sad story about a girl who at 6 years old was essentially abandoned emotionally by her Dad who said it was "too painful" to talk about her molestation. Excuse me? That is just one teeny sliver of pain compared to what your little girl went through and continued to feel her entire life. I agree with y'all - I want to cut that stupid hair off and slap some sense into him. I had to rewind it when Shandon had a trick at her house -- and then I realized she lived with her DAD and they weren't at some motel.

The family BBQ was very cringy. I can see both sides of things -- the family is probably sick of pretending that nothing is wrong, so they say things like "eat something.... we are SO happy to see you... your arms look terrible..." That just puts Shandon in the hot seat, being the center of attention, and she probably just wanted to shrink under the table with everyone looking at her. It's uncomfortable all around. I've been at family functions where we try to ignore that the addict is completely high, and don't say anything. It's surreal. Then the next time we all say something and again it's surreal for different reasons. It's not easy. 

And, the drug dealer comes over to sell her drugs because she's sick - and the Dad thanks him. THANKS HIM for selling drugs to his daughter. It must be horrible to see your daughter so dope sick but come on dude, that is NOT the way to help her.

Alana's wife was at the intervention (for those of you who didn't see her.) Her younger sister (Brooke?)  -- I usually don't mind body piercings but oy, those lip piercings looked painful and awkward to me. 

Random thought about Maureen the interventionist - I find her distracting. I swear she has a glass eye or something, they only film her from one particular angle and I keep staring at her left eye. Totally superficial I know, but there you have it. This is the kind of stuff I pick up on. 

[mythoughtis]

34 minutes ago, hookedontv said:

Her younger sister (Brooke?)  -- I usually don't mind body piercings but oy, those lip piercings looked painful and awkward to me. 

I thought so too.  I also really wondered where all the tears came from at the intervention. She already said  on camera that she wasn’t very close to Shandon and didn’t seem to care  one way or the other up until she read her letters 

[Angel03]

I'm so over how people use the excuse of childhood problems! I was molested, my mother gave me away bcuz she'd rather be with the molestor, then when I grew up and found her she killed herself bcuz she was more afraid of harboring him a fugitive than be with me. If more people would use there childhood pain as, a motive to have a better life instead of an excuse to do drugs or hear people say ohhhh poor baby this world would be a lot stronger! Stop letting others control ur life! Everyone has had an unfair life it's what YOU make it that counts! 

[TVbitch]

On 9/1/2020 at 5:02 PM, OoogleEyes said:

I wonder where Shandon is today 

From her sister from FB...

Weirdly they missed and didn’t air a lot of stuff. They focused primarily on her prostitution, and my mom leaving, my dad ect... but missed all the screaming, slamming doors so hard they almost broke off the hinges.Or all her mental health issues... the fact she was taking drugs for illnesses she didn’t even have. How she’s bipolar.That everyone in our family abandoned her.Or the fact on my honeymoon I had to call Shandon multiple times a day trying to convince her to stay. So much. But other than that it was well done. Very hard to watch. I bawled like a baby. Shandon now is part of a medical program, and is doing so well. This show changed my families life.

[mythoughtis]

2 hours ago, TVbitch said:

Weirdly they missed and didn’t air a lot of stuff. They focused primarily on her prostitution, and my mom leaving, my dad ect... but missed all the screaming, slamming doors so hard they almost broke off the hinges.Or all her mental health issues... the fact she was taking drugs for illnesses she didn’t even have. How she’s bipolar.

They only have about 38 minutes of air time after you subtract commercials.  Part of that is devoted to the pre-intervention, the intervention and the journey to the rehab.  So they can only show so much film.   Most of the viewers are already aware that many addicted are self medicating for mental issues.  
 

Good to know Shandon ended up in a program.